35. Rosalie

THIRTY-FIVE

Rosalie

T he knock at the door startles me, even though it is not the first to have come in the middle of the night. I was not sleeping, just sitting by the fireplace remembering.

It has become a dangerous habit lately, to sit and remember the way things used to be instead of thinking about the way things are now.

As soon as the battle was over, and the sky returned to normal, it was tempting to feel as though we were safe.

Mira brought word from the city. When she told me what Alana had done, I could hardly bring myself to believe it. And yet, somehow, I was not surprised. It felt as though, maybe, everything had always been leading up to this.

I saw Alana the way I had always seen her in my mind's eye, but then I saw her through a different lens. One that showed every slice of pain that was ever inflicted on her, showed her tossed and turned in the wind of others' wants and fears.

She didn't stand a chance.

And neither did we.

I am only pleased Kayan is not here to see what became of her. Because it would break his heart the way it breaks mine.

When I reach the door, I hesitate, my hand hovering over the handle.

"My lady?" a small voice pipes up behind me. I turn to see Lily, the blue-eyed child who arrived on my doorstep just days ago, seeking sanctuary with her friends. "Should I hide?"

I smile reassuringly at her. "No need, little one. Stay close, though."

Taking a deep breath, I open the door, expecting to see more orphans or waifs or strays because Mira has been passing word that our home is safe.

Whether it truly is or not, I don't know. But for now, Alana seems to be leaving us alone.

I waver and steady myself on the doorframe.

I turn back towards the inside of the house, wondering if I'm somehow walking in my sleep. Dreaming while awake.

I physically pinch my arm and wince at the pain.

"Kayan?" I whisper. "Kayan?" I repeat his name like a prayer.

He smiles at me. His hair is the same, his lips, his eyes, his cheeks. But he is different somehow. His skin has a blueish tint to it and his wings... I have not seen them like that since before Alana took his powers.

Beside him, Maura, Raine, and Pen smile at me too.

"It is very good to see you, child." Maura moves forward and wraps me in a tight embrace.

But my focus is entirely on Kayan. Without thinking, I move aside from Maura and reach out to him.

"Are you really here?"

"Not really," he says. "I'm . . ."

"A spirit," Raine offers. "From what we can work out."

"How?" I move my fingers towards him.

To my shock, my hand doesn't pass through him. Instead, I feel the solid warmth of his chest beneath my palm. A jolt of energy passes between us, like a current of pure emotion.

Kayan inhales sharply. "I feel you," he breathes.

"I feel you, too."

"Rose." Kayan's eyes soften.

Unable to hold back any longer, I throw myself into his arms. He catches me, his embrace as strong and comforting as I remember. Tears stream down my face as I cling to him, breathing in his familiar scent.

"How are you here?" I whisper, picturing the torn remains of his portrait. Still in my dresser upstairs.

Kayan's arms tighten around me. I still feel him, and I have no idea how. "It's complicated," he says softly. "But I'm here now. And we're here because we need your help, Rose. Luminael isn't safe for us. Can we stay here?"

"Of course, you can."

A shadow passes over Kayan's face. "Things have... changed, Rose. Alana's not the same person we knew. The power she's gained, it's..."

"I know. I've heard the stories."

"She flooded the city." Lily, the tiny Shadowkind girl, speaks up from behind me. Her blue eyes glisten. "We nearly drowned."

"You poor child." Maura steps towards Lily and places a kind hand on the girl's shoulder. "But you made it out and made it here. Well done."

"A lady helped us," she says. "A lady called Briony. She was kind. She had black hair. But she died."

Kayan and Maura exchange a look that tells me they know exactly who Briony was.

I want to ask them about it, but now is not the time.

I straighten up, wiping my tears away. "Come in," I say, stepping back to allow them entry. "All of you. Tell me everything."

As the group files past me into the hall, my hand finds Kayan's again. Our fingers intertwine, and that same spark of energy passes between us. I'm not letting go of him again. Never. Not ever.

"Was it you?" I ask as we walk slowly down the hall.

He looks down at me.

"Did you drown my husband, Kayan? And did you visit me in my bed? And by the fountain?"

He does not smile, but nods at me, holding my gaze. "Yes. The answer to all of those questions is yes."

I breathe in deeply, remembering his touch, and the way it felt when I woke up and learned Cassius was dead. As if a guardian angel was looking after me. "Thank you."

"I would do anything for you, Rose."

"Don't ever leave me again."

"I promise."

In front of us, Lily is leading Maura and the others into the kitchen and offering to make them tea, and fetch them food, and find clean clothes. She looks at Raine's arms and gasps when she realises she's holding a baby.

Raine sits down at the table, and her entire body seems to relax.

"For now, they are safe." I keep hold of Kayan's hand.

"For now," he says. "But I don't know how long we have. Alana can't be trusted. She has too much power, now. And the empathy she was born with? That was supposed to save us? It has turned to ice in her veins, Rosalie."

"Do you think she will come for us?"

He squeezes my hand tighter. But he doesn't answer me.

He doesn't need to.

I already know the answer.