Chapter 11

Amber

I stare in the direction Rico disappeared and turn back to his mom. I shake my head. "Hockey players are a special breed, aren't they?"

Rico's mom laughs. "Yes, they are."

"My brother-in-law, Aiden, is like that. He'll be sitting with us one minute. The next, he's heading downstairs to work out or to escape; my money's on the latter."

Maria smiles. "Yes, I can see that with Aiden. He's not really a people person."

I practically snort at that because he's the furthest thing from a people person. "You seem to know him pretty well. Do you know all the guys on the team?" Curiosity gets the best of me.

"Between the games and seeing the guys coming and going from here, I've gotten to know several of them over the last few years, I guess. They're good boys."

I laugh at that. "Boys?"

"Well, that's how I see them, at least. But you're right; they're men. Good men. Well, most of them anyway. The debate's still out on that Sebastian."

"I'm totally telling him you said that."

She gives me a look. "Like that will bother him."

"He's getting much better now that he married Stephanie," I admit.

She sighs. "That boy is so head over heels in love." We're both quiet a moment, and I hate the now somber atmosphere.

"Did you..." I regret the words.

"Did I what?" she pushes.

"Did you ever feel that kind of love with Rico's dad?"

She takes a deep breath. "I thought I did." I nod because I feel those words in the depths of my soul.

"Do you ever wish he stayed?" Part of me can't believe I'm asking these questions of almost a complete stranger, and yet, I feel a connection with Rico's mom. These are the questions I want to ask my own mom, but I've been too scared to. And yes, I realize I'm a coward.

"It wasn't him that walked out the door." I stare at her as she continues. "Marriage is supposed to be forever. I believed that when I got married, and I believe that now. But I also don't believe a woman should stay with a man who is abusive—whether that's physical or emotional. When a woman has to protect her children from their father..." she shakes her head. "That's not how it's supposed to be. I've seen far too many women stay when they should have left, and it cost them their children and sometimes almost their very lives. My friend almost didn't make it out of the house the night her husband set it on fire." She swallows hard. "That's not okay. That kind of a man doesn't get to be with his wife or his children."

It's absolutely silent after her revelation. "Is that how Rico's dad was? Abusive?"

"Never obviously. But he didn't come home at night, would get calls all hours of the night, didn't have explanations for where all our money disappeared to. Then he would have the audacity to boss me around and tell me all the ways I was a failure as a wife. He would demand that we have sex; it was my duty." She laughs but it's not humorous. "He would have bouts of anger where he would throw things or punch his hand through a wall. I knew it was a matter of time before it was me or one of the kids, and I wasn't going to wait around for that to happen. I told him; I gave him chance after chance. It was always the same—excuses, empty promises. It was time for me to leave. I packed up what little the kids and I had and walked out the door and never looked back. We made our own way."

I swallow down the emotion in my throat. "I think you're the bravest person I know."

She smiles. "Not really." She studies me. "Did you leave him, or did he leave you?"

The scene I walked in on flashes before my eyes, and I shake my head. "I walked in on him with another woman."

"And you left him for good?" she presses.

"Oh yeah. I'm never going back with him, not even if he begged me."

She pats my hand. "Then I don't think we're that different. You're brave too, Amber."

Tears hit the backs of my eyes, and I groan. "Pregnancy hormones. I never cried before I got pregnant."

She laughs. "I remember those days well. But I meant what I said. It takes courage to leave a man. You're pregnant and alone, and yet you're not running back to him. You're the bravest person I know too."

I stare at her. "You really think it's brave?"

"I do." I let her words sink in for a moment and lean back in my chair. My stomach isn't trying to empty itself for the first time in forever. Maybe it's that, or maybe it's that I feel really comfortable with Rico's mom; but I feel myself opening up. I blow out a breath. "I don't wish I wasn't pregnant, because I know this is a gift. It's just kind of hard to see that right now. Does that make me a terrible person?"

Rico's mom puts her hand over mine. "No, Honey. Not at all. You're just being honest. It's a lot—being pregnant and on your own. I'm not going to sugarcoat it for you. You have a rough road ahead of you." I drop my head. "But you're up to the task, Amber."

I meet her eyes. "How do you know?"

"Because you're strong." I huff at that; if only she knew how weak I really was. "You are. I've only known you for a little bit, and I can already tell that. And you're going to make it. This little one growing in your belly isn't a mistake, Amber. Oh, the circumstances surrounding the birth I'm sure feel like a mistake; but it's not. There are plenty of women out there who want to get pregnant and can't. What you have in your belly is a miracle."

Her words make me stop and think. "I never thought about it like that before. Even if I made a mistake in getting pregnant in the first place? I should have never been with him in that way. I wanted to wait like Brielle. I just...I don't know. I guess I got carried away in what I thought we had. I thought maybe if I gave in, he would want me more." I shake my head. "Even I can hear the idiocy in my words." I shake my head in disgust. "I am such an idiot."

"What's done is done. All the self-loathing won't change it. Now, it's time to focus on your baby. But—" she pauses. "You do know what went wrong, so you don't end up in this predicament again, right?"

Tears immediately well up. "I do. I'm pretty sure I'm never going to date another guy again," I say trying to lighten the mood.

"No, don't say that. You just have to wait for the right man for the next time, Amber—a man who will love you and worship the ground you walk on, who will want to be with you and have you at all his games."

I huff out a laugh. "Oh, I'm not dating another hockey player again or any other sports player for that matter. I learned my lesson the first time. Whew. No professional athletes for me."

Maria gives me a small smile. "Never say never."

I lean forward and put my other hand over her hand that's covering mine. "Thank you for talking to me. I can't tell you how much better I feel."

"It's the soup; it works wonders," she says with a smile.

"Yeah, that too; but seriously, thank you for talking to me."

"Of course. Anytime you want to talk, you make my son bring you here. I loved talking to you, and it gets lonely in my empty house."

I look around. "You don't live here?"

"No. I have a small house on the back of this property. Rico built it for me before he moved in here."

"He wouldn't allow you to live here?" I ask, trying to piece together the nice-guy I know with what she's saying.

"Oh, he offered so many times. But someday, he's going to bring home a wife and then fill this house with babies. He doesn't need his mother in the way."

"Oh, okay. Well, as long as he was being kind to you and didn't kick you out. Otherwise, I would have to talk to him," I tell her.

Her eyebrows raise and her eyes twinkle. "Would you now?"

"Of course."

"I think we are going to get along just fine. You tell my Rico to bring you over again soon, okay? When you do, just walk on the path on the side of the house. It will take you to my house. Or better yet, come on a Tuesday night. That's when Rico and I have dinner together if he's not playing that night."

"I will; thank you." I stand up and stretch. "I need to head to the bathroom and then I'll head out."

"Give me a hug, Dear." She gives me a tight squeeze, one I can't help but return. "Don't be a stranger." She heads towards the door.

"Do you need me to walk you over?"

She waves me off. "No. I'm perfectly capable. Bye, Amber."

"Bye, Mrs. Garcia."

"Oh, none of that Mrs. Stuff. It's Maria."

A door opens behind us, and I turn and stop. Rico comes into the living room with his shirt thrown over his shoulder instead of wearing it. He's sweaty from his workout and...I whirl around, feeling my face heat up. "Are you leaving?" he asks his mom, and I step away to give them privacy.

"Bye, Amber," she calls out one last time.

I turn around and regret it immediately. "Bye."

"Go take a shower," his mom says, pushing him away. She leaves, and he closes the door behind her.

"Hey, I'm going to take a quick shower. I'll be out in less than five minutes."

"That's fine," I say waving him away without looking at him. I head back to the comfy couch and settle against the pillows and berate myself. Being attracted to good-looking hockey players is what got me into the mess I'm experiencing in the first place. It's just hormones. I push away the image and any kind of thoughts of Rico's muscular, tan chest, with not one but two, maybe even more tattoos on it. I grit my teeth. Not helping. I pull out my phone, needing a distraction. When I realize how late it is, I decide to just put in for an Uber. I need to get home; I still have some studying to do before tomorrow. I've barely finished booking it when Rico comes out.

"How'd things go with my mom? I hope she wasn't too much in your business," he says as he settles in the armchair across from me.

"No, she was really great. We had a good talk." I keep looking at my phone, mostly because I'm scared to see if he's put on a shirt or not. I've sworn off men, and with how my hormones are acting right now, it's really best I'm not around any attractive men right now. No, not attractive men. Just men. I stand to my feet. "Well, thank you. I really appreciate it. Have a good night."

He steps into my path, immediately blocking. "Whoa, where are you going?"

"I'm leaving. My Uber gets here in—" I check my phone. "Soon." It's still fourteen minutes out, but I'm not going to tell him that. He'll feel like he has to entertain me until then.

"Amber, you're not taking an Uber home. If you're ready, I'll take you home."

"Oh no. I'm fine. It's already on its way."

"Well, cancel it then."