1. Massimo “Max” Giraldi: Christmas

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MASSIMO “MAX” GIRALDI – CHRISTMAS

W hen can I get the fuck out of here?

I spent the last nearly two months guarding Gia. I provided support and enacted plans that helped Nic usurp his father and take over as Don of the Nardone Family. I’ve done my job, and now I want to return to Las Vegas and live my life as I’ve lived it the last five years, running the Nardone crime syndicate in Nevada and not having to think of how I betrayed Nic and my vow to Gia’s mother.

Around me, everyone is in a festive mood. Gia’s four-year old twins, Daniella and Dario, are playing with one of the bazillions toys they received this Christmas morning. Nic is gushing over his young bride-to-be, Bella, whom he knocked up, and this morning, proposed to. I’ll be honest, I never saw that coming. Not that Bella isn’t a nice woman, but Nic was as committed to bachelorhood as I’ve been. Women just complicate everything. A lesson I learned the hard way five years ago when I fucked Gia Nardone.

I shake my head of the memory that haunts me, even more so over the last few weeks I’ve been forced to protect her. I focus my gaze out the window, watching our men guard the premises, wishing something would happen so I'd have an excuse to leave.

“Unless there’s a specific threat, you need to join us to celebrate Christmas,” Nic says as he joins me by the window.

“Ever since you became Don, you’re bossier.” I hate that I sound like a jerk, but my nerves are coiled tight. After two months, I’m about to come apart and I don’t want to do that. I want to go home and put Gia behind me again.

“I earned it,” Nic says with an arch of his brow.

I glance at him. “With my help.” I was the one who sent men to ambush Paulie and Tommy at the airport when they captured Nic and prepared to deliver him to his father. I’m the one who networked within the family to solidify Nic’s rise to power in anticipation of Nic killing his father. I’m the one who ferreted out those who opposed Nic. And I did it all the while keeping an eye on Gia and her kids even as it gutted me to do so.

Nic pats my shoulder. “I’ll never forget that you saved my ass. That’s why I’d like you to enjoy life a bit.”

I roll my eyes. Love has made Nic a putz. “Ever since you found Bella, you think more about that?—”

“I’ve learned life is more fulfilling with a woman.”

I step away from the window and down my bourbon. It’s time I left. “I want to go back to Las Vegas.” It’s not the first time I’ve told him this, and I’m annoyed that he’s not sending me home.

“No. I want you here. Second in command. Vegas is running smoothly with Dominic.”

My jaw tightens. My gaze flits to the living area where Gia is talking to Bella while the twins play games. I’d be happy to stay and be Nic’s second, except being in New York means being around Gia.

“You don’t need me. Leo would be great as underboss?—”

“I want you. Unless you can give me a good reason that you have to go.”

“Fucking hell, Nic. I like it there. I do good for the business there.” I wince at my outburst. At least I didn’t tell him that being around Gia is making me crazy. Maybe I should. Maybe he’d send me away. Or maybe he’d kill me. Right now, I’d be okay with either.

He studies me. “Why do I feel like you’re running from something instead of toward something?”

I look down into my empty glass, wishing for a refill. “What does it matter why?”

“Because it does. You’re not just my most trusted friend, you’re my brother. I’m not out of the woods in getting the business straight. In keeping Gia and the kids safe. But I also care about you. If there’s something going on?—”

“If you care, you’ll let me go.” I stare at him, wanting him to see how serious I am.

He nods. “What if I need you?”

“Then call. But I need to get back there, Nic. Don’t make me stay, Don Cardone.” I use his official title, not out of respect but because I’m a dick.

He looks like he wants to punch me. “Okay. If you promise to come if I need you, then okay.”

I nod. “Thank you.”

“Now, come enjoy Christmas with the family.”

I check my watch. I have no place I need to be, but I need to get out of here. “Actually, I need to go.”

“What the fuck, Max?”

I shrug and give him a coy smile. “Hot date.” The lie comes easily because it could be true. In fact, if I can leave and go to the club, maybe I’ll find Denise. She’s always good for a solid night of fucking. Or at least she was five years ago.

No, if I can get out of here, I’m heading to the airport and flying home. I’ve got plenty of women to choose from to deal with the constant hard-on I’ve had since returning to New York to guard Gia.

“Don’t lie to me,” Nic snaps.

I look down, feeling the shame from lying. “I just need to go.”

“You can go after you help Gia do the dishes.” Now he’s the one being a dick.

“Fine.” I start to walk away, but Nic stops me.

“I love you, man. Please, tell me what’s going on?”

“Nothing. I just want to go home.” That’s the truth, even if I don’t reveal the reasons. I look down where his hand is holding my arm. “I’m going to do the dishes.”

He releases me, and I go to the kitchen to do as my Don ordered. The dinner dishes are already in the dishwasher. It’s just the big pots and pans soaking in the sink that need to be washed. My sleeves are already rolled up as I turn on the water and start to scrub.

“Would you like another drink?”

I stop short as Gia’s voice cuts through the sound of the water.

I don’t look up but instead resume scrubbing turkey bits from the pan. “No. Thanks.” Please leave runs like a mantra through my mind.

“Did I do something to make you mad?”

Inwardly, I swear, feeling even shittier that I’m making her think she’s to blame for my assholishness. “No.”

“Max, I’ve been trying to find time to talk to you but?—”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” I rinse the pot and set it on the counter.

She’s quiet, and I can picture in my mind’s eye the hurt on her face that I’m acting like five years ago didn’t happen. That I hadn’t given in and fucked her. That I hadn’t fallen for her. That I hadn’t turned around and left her to marry that fucker Aldo Cantore instead of saving her from an abusive, loveless marriage arranged by her father. The only silver lining from that is her kids. I can see how much she loves them. She’s a wonderful mother.

“It’s important?—”

“How can it be? It’s been over five years.” I quickly finish the last two pots and dry my hands on a dish towel hanging by the sink. “I’ve got to get going.” Then like the coward I am, I leave the kitchen. Once again, I walk away from Gia Nardone.

“I’m heading out. Dishes are done, Boss,” I announce to Nic. He looks at me like he doesn’t know who I am.

“Bye, Uncle Max.” The kids rush over to give me a hug. I try to guard against the pang of sadness that fills me. If life had been different, these kids could have been mine. If Nic weren’t my best friend. If I weren’t Gia’s Godfather. If Gino Nardone didn’t tell me he’d kill Gia if she didn’t marry Aldo… If, if, if.

“Be good to your mom,” I say to the twins. I glance over at Bella sitting on the couch. “Merry Christmas, Bella.”

“Merry Christmas, Max.”

Nic rises from next to Bella and walks me to the door. “Last chance. What’s going on?”

I shake my head. “I’m going home. That’s all.” I smile, wanting to change the mood of this parting moment. “I know it’s not my place, but I’m proud of you. I know your mom and Gia’s mom would be too. You’re going to be a great Don.” And it’s true. Nic is ruthless, but he’s not a homicidal maniac with depraved sexual tendencies like his father was. He’ll be a good Don. He’ll help everyone make even more money. And because he’s a lawyer, he’ll do it while keeping everyone out of jail.

“Travel safe, brother.” He gives me a hug, and then I hightail it out of Gia’s front door.

Free. At last.

I say goodbye to the men outside who I’ve been working with since my return to New York. I have one of them drive me to the airport, calling for a pilot so I can lift off and head to Las Vegas ASAP.

Once in the private plane, flying west, thousands of feet from the ground, I let out a breath. It feels like I’ve been holding it since the moment Nic called me two months ago and asked me to come home to protect Gia. I hadn’t wanted to do it. But how could I get out of it? I’d made a promise to her mother all those years ago.

At seventeen, Gia’s mother, Nic’s stepmother, asked me and Nic to protect her infant, Gia, if anything happened to her. As her brother and heir to the family, Nic would be able to assert his power to make decisions for Gia. Me? I was just a soldier with no real connection to the family, so she made me Gia’s godfather.

At the time, Nic and I had agreed to her request because we liked her and figured she’d live a long time. But she knew something we didn’t. Gia was barely a year old when her mother vanished. We both knew it was Gino’s doing, but we couldn’t prove it. So Nic followed through, making arrangements for Gia’s care and always being on guard to protect her from Gino or whoever else wanted access to her.

I was around Gia off and on. My work was in sticking close to Gino, keeping tabs on any plans he made for Gia.

I turn to look out the plane’s window, the sky dark, starless as the plane hurls west. Memories of Gia flood back, memories I’ve been trying to repress. Like when she came home from boarding school at eighteen and for the first time I saw her as a woman, not a child. She was stunningly beautiful, with long, honey-blonde hair like her mother had, her green eyes alight with mischief and life. I was thirty-five years old and revolted by my reaction.

She was tired of Nic’s overprotectiveness, so he asked me to take over the duties of keeping an eye on her as her father prepared for her marriage to Aldo Cantore. Spending time with her was like being around the sun or daisies. All perky brightness. Effervescence. Joy. It was intoxicating.

I’d done my job and kept my old man perversions to myself.

And then she asked me to fuck her.

At first, I was sure I misunderstood. That my sick fantasies had me hallucinating. But no. She was clear. She wanted me to fuck her.

I said no, of course.

“Why?”

My mouth was dry. “Well… let’s see… I’m your godfather?—”

“Oh, please. You’re not a father figure.”

“I’m like a brother.”

She shook her head. “To Nic, maybe, but not me.” She tilted her head to the side. “Do you see me as your sister?”

I remember telling myself to say yes. Instead, I told the truth. “No. But you’re engaged?—”

“That’s why I want this. Aldo is going to lay on top of me and do his thing.” She made a face of disgust. “But I know it can be something nice. I want that. Just once, at least.”

God, how I wanted to give that to her. But I wasn’t an idiot then, just like I’m not now.

“First, that’s risky, but second, I’m sure there are other young men who?—”

“I want someone who knows what they’re doing. Someone I can trust. I want you, Max.”

I close my eyes as that moment plays out in my head yet again. The tug of war of doing what was right versus what she wanted, versus what I wanted.

Wrong won out in the end. I fucked her. To this day, I can hear the sweet sounds she made each time I made her come. When I jerk off, I can remember how her tight pussy felt pulsing around my cock. And on cue, the guilt and shame come on as strong now as they had then.

I knew she loved me. I knew she wanted me to save her from Aldo and her father. And oh, how I wanted to. I’d even tried to figure out how to make it happen.

A week later, Gino called me into his office. He told me Gia had a crush on me. He said my vow to his late wife—a hint that she was dead, not just missing—was commendable, but that it put Gia in a compromising position.

“If she’s not a virgin?—”

“I would never.” I remember praying he couldn’t see the lie.

“Doesn’t matter. Gia’s behavior is unacceptable. If Aldo thinks she tainted, then she’s useless to me, just like her mother was.”

I understood the threat.

“I can’t have her making goo-goo eyes at you, Max, and ruining everything. I’m sending you to Vegas. Do well there, and I’ll reward you handsomely.”

I didn’t care about going to Vegas then, but I went because I knew Gia’s life depended on it. And since then, I’ve made a life. Gino, for the asshole he was, stuck to his word, and within three years, I was heading the business in Las Vegas. Gia had to marry that fucker Aldo, but he gave her two kids and then Nic, or I presume it was Nic, killed him. Everything turned out.

And as long as I stay in Las Vegas, life is copasetic.

As the plane begins its descent into Las Vegas, I take in the lights and push away everything from New York, just as I did five years ago. I breathe out a sigh of relief to be home, to cleanse Gia from my mind. If only I could purge her from my heart.