Chapter 16

The ride to the castle was tense and silent. When we entered the courtyard, Sigurn slid from his borrowed horse and stalked into the castle. Around the courtyard, the youngest among the stable hands and squires gaped at him. Any human in Ishulum would have caused a stir, but Sigurn was a startling sight wherever he went.

Liria watched him go, a series of emotions rushing through her eyes. Disbelief. Confusion. Anger. Hurt. When she dismounted and faced me, only anger remained.

"Has he been here before?" she asked.

"No." I held onto my temper, which urged me to ask her just how many fucking times she'd met Sigurn Brighthelm and why, even with distance between us, I smelled him on her.

She was silent a moment. Then she huffed. "I don't believe you."

I turned to one of my captains, who'd taken the myriad surprises of the day in stride. "Follow Sigurn Brighthelm. Have the steward find a room for him." I started to turn away, but as a muffled shout of surprise drifted from the castle, I swung back. "And make sure he doesn't try to kill anyone."

"Yes, Your Majesty," the captain said, jogging to obey.

Liria bristled at the title. With a final, scathing look in my direction, she spun on her heel and followed Sigurn inside.

I summoned one of the squires who lingered in the courtyard. "Find Lord Estalar. Tell him to wait for me in my chambers."

The squire nodded. "Right away, Your Majesty."

Steeling myself for the storm to come, I followed Liria. She ignored me when I caught up to her, but the anger in the air around her intensified.

I stayed a few steps behind, my boots loud on the flagstones. The corridors were empty, the castle seemingly deserted, but I knew that was far from the case. Within the hour, every noble at court would know I'd returned from Andulum with Liria and a human in tow. Gossip would flow like wine. The lords of the Winter Council were a separate and more pressing problem. But I'd taken the scepter. Hopefully, Estalar could persuade them it was in everyone's best interests to maintain peace. So far, he'd proven himself to be a trustworthy ally.

Ahead, Liria's hair swished around her hips as she climbed the staircase leading to her chamber. She reached the landing and walked faster, outrage practically warping the air around her. When she reached her room, she swung through the door and tried to shut it in my face.

I stuck my foot between the door and the jamb.

"I don't want you in my room!" she cried.

"I'm aware, but we need to talk." I pushed enough to step past her.

She stumbled back, then slammed the door and turned on me. "I have nothing to say to you or your human pet."

"Sigurn isn't my pet."

"I mean it, Ronan. Get out!"

"I'm not going anywhere until you've heard what I have to say." I stepped toward her, the anger I'd held in check threatening to slip its restraints. "And you're going to answer a few questions."

Her green eyes shot sparks, and a little vein appeared in her forehead. "You're in no position to demand answers from me."

I moved without really thinking, my hands closing over her shoulders. "You smell like him," I grated, jealousy roiling my gut. "You slept with him."

She thrust her chin up, looking me dead in the eye. "I told you, Glesso. Sticking your dick in me changed nothing between us. You don't own me." Her voice dropped to a hiss. "But to answer your question, no, I didn't sleep with Sigurn. I fucked him. And I loved every second of it."

A red haze descended over my vision. Between one breath and the next, I hauled her onto her toes, my fingers tight on her arms. "You play with fire, little girl. I could marry you and then send you North, where you'll have nothing but wind and glaciers for company. I'll visit you once a year to get an heir."

She thrust her face into mine, and her voice shook with obvious rage as she said, "Try it, and I'll greet you with a knife."

"No, you won't," I growled. "You'll be spread and waiting, eager for the dick you clearly can't get enough of."

She swung, but I was ready for her, and I caught her fist and twisted it behind her.

"What did I tell you the last time you hit me?" I demanded, my blood pumping harder.

Her breasts heaved as she fought my grip. "More threats, Ronan? Will you beat me now?"

"If you think me capable of putting my hands on you that way, you don't know me at all." I released her and shoved my fingers through her hair, dragging her head back so she had no choice but to see the truth in my eyes. "Na-tesku," I rasped, the ancient words ripped from my soul. I love you. "Na-tesku."

Liria froze, the blood draining from her face as the magic of the Old Language sparked around us. "You risk obsession."

A bitter laugh rose in my throat. I let it out, my breath teasing the little hairs around her face. "It's too late. I'm already obsessed." I splayed my hands around her head, my fingers tight against her delicate skull. "You've driven me to it, Liria. You drive me mad."

For one long, tense moment, neither of us moved. We stayed like that, locked together as power curled around us. Her green eyes were huge, and her pulse fluttered in her neck.

I lowered my hands and stepped back. "I've kept things from you. I shouldn't have, but I can't change the past. All I can do is ask you to listen to me now."

She wrapped her arms around her midsection. After a second, she gave a tiny nod.

"When I swore to be your guardian, I also swore to raise you to take the throne. That was always my goal. You were meant to rule. I was going to make it happen. For ten years, I did everything to prepare you to be queen in your own right."

"So what changed?" she demanded, stormclouds in her eyes.

"Haluven spoke to me in the Crypt just before he died. He told me your magic will never be strong enough for you to wield the scepter. Your father knew this from the time you were named in the Winter Forest. That's why your parents kept trying for another child. I begged Haluven to rise and tell you this himself, but he refused."

She gazed at me, her eyes two huge green pools of devastation. "You're lying."

"I'm not." Unable to help myself, I stepped into her and cupped her jaw. I stroked my thumb over her cheek, my heart aching for the little girl who'd been ignored and pushed aside by the people who should have loved her regardless of her gifts—or lack of them. "I never wanted to take anything from you, Liria. I'm not lying to you, my love."

"Don't." She squeezed her eyes shut. Shook her head and shrugged out of my grip. I let her go, and she backed up and pinched the bridge of her nose, her head bent like she was trying to block me out. Or maybe block out the things I'd told her.

I stood silently. Helplessly. Waiting for what came next, whatever it might be. Because I wasn't going anywhere. Just when I considered reaching for her again, she lifted her head.

"Vow it," she said. "Say it in the Old Language."

"Na-sessni,"I said at once. "I visited Haluven in the Crypt the day you and I argued about suitors coming to the castle. Your father spoke to me for the first time in ten years. He told me you would never wield the scepter. I didn't know before, Liria, I swear it."

A tear streaked down her cheek. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I should have. I was going to the night your mother died and we moved your father upstairs. At first, I hesitated because I worried you wouldn't believe me. That it might drive you away or into another man's arms. And now I know it did."

Anger leapt into her eyes. "You mean it drove me into your frostbound servant's arms."

"Sigurn isn't frostbound. He's frost-touched."

Her brows snapped together. "What's the difference?"

She might have known if she'd studied more. But now wasn't the time to revive that old argument between us. "Sigurn and I have an agreement. He spends short periods in Ishulum, which lets him draw power from me and carry it back to Nordlinga, where he can use it to protect his people. In return, he anchors me in Andulum, which allows me to retain my magic when I cross the Covenant. Our bond is temporary. We can end it whenever we wish."

Comprehension dawned in her eyes. "You did this so you can hunt the descendants of the men who killed your father."

"Yes."

She studied me, the frown reappearing between her elegantly arched brows. "I understand what you get out of it, but why would Sigurn take that kind of risk? The elfkin are despised in Andulum. If his people discover he's working with you, they'll kill him."

"Risk is relative. Without power over ice and snow, he could lose his kingdom. Nordlinga is a frigid place. So far, he's been able to use the gifts he borrows by hiding in plain sight."

Silence fell, and I could see her thinking it over—turning my words this way and that in her mind. I'd taught her to be skeptical. To look for weaknesses and deception.

"If the bond is temporary," she said, "why does he bear your sigil? Why did his eye change when he crossed the Covenant? Those are the signs of a frostbound human."

Naturally, she'd identified the sticking points I didn't want to answer. Pride stirred in my chest, even as I knew her line of questioning wasn't going to end well for me. "Humans can't stay frost-touched indefinitely. Every moment Sigurn spends steeped in the magic of Ishulum, it's more difficult for him to return to Andulum. If he lingers on this side of the Covenant too long, he'll eventually lose his ability to cross the barrier. If that happens, our bond will become permanent."

"And you'll control him forever." She frowned again, and she spoke almost to herself as she added, "Sigurn would hate that."

From the look on her face, she would hate it. Did she care for him? A dark and complicated well of emotions stirred within me. Jealousy rose to the surface. "You're quick to champion him," I said tightly, "but the bond is far from one-sided. Trust me, Sigurn has derived plenty of benefit from being frost-touched. Without access to my power, he probably couldn't have turned the tide of war in favor of his father. Erland would have died in exile, and Sigurn with him."

Liria's eyes widened. "You've had this arrangement since he fought for his father's crown? That means you've known Sigurn for?—"

"Ten years," I said, "and I should have told you. But you were young, and…I was scared."

"Of what? Did you think I would disapprove?"

"Maybe. Of course, I had no idea you were following me to the Covenant." As pink tinged her cheeks, I brushed my knuckles down the delicate line of her jaw. "I'm your guardian. I'm supposed to set a good example, not break the law in front of you. Then again, I've done more than break the law when it comes to you."

Her blush deepened, and a hint of desire stirred in her eyes. But doubt swam there, too. "Ronan…" she began.

"I want you to be my wife. Rule by my side. I can keep the cold, Liria, but it's meaningless if I can't keep you. Do you understand? Nothing terrifies me like the thought of losing you. I'm in love with you. How many times do I have to say it before you believe me? Because whatever that number is, I'll exceed it."

She stayed quiet, her demeanor as hesitant and watchful as the fawns that played along her collarbones.

"I want to please you," I said. "I'll never stop trying to make you happy."

Another shivering moment passed. Then she stepped out of my reach once more, her shoulders stiff. "What about Sigurn?"

It took effort to keep my voice neutral. "We can put what happened today behind us."

Her gaze hardened. "Maybe I'm not ready to do that, Ronan."

Panic flared in my chest. "What does that mean?"

"I don't know!" She moved back a step, and an agitated air fell over her. "You've dumped this…revelation on me. Now you want me to say yes to you, but you've kept things from me, including your bond with Sigurn. I don't even know how that makes me feel. I need time to think."

Disappointment was a bitter taste in my mouth. I wanted nothing more than to plead my case—to start over from the beginning, listing all the reasons why marriage made perfect sense and any alternative was unacceptable. I'd told her everything.

But, of course, I hadn't. Not quite.

"I won't pressure you," I said. "But I want you to think about everything we've discussed."

"I just said I would." She hid her hands in the folds of her skirts—one of her tells. "What have you done with my father's body?"

"Haluven rests in the Crypt beside your mother. I wanted to leave the funeral arrangements to you, so you can honor your parents however you wish."

Liria wrapped her arms around her midsection. "Kind of you, Your Majesty."

"Don't do that," I said softly. "I'm mourning, too. Haluven was my best friend for close to two centuries."

She dropped her eyes to my shoulder. "So what happens while I decide whether I accept your proposal? Am I a prisoner?"

"No. This is your home. It'll never be your prison."

"The night my mother died, I heard the guards say you ordered me confined to my chamber."

Gods."Someone twisted my words, Liria. I couldn't find you. I told the guards to hold you in your chamber because I wanted to speak to you. I was going to tell you about Haluven."

She looked at me, her green eyes inscrutable. "Well, you've done that."

Dismissed.Even slightly bedraggled in the same black gown she'd worn when she sat beside her father, she'd never looked more like a queen.

I went to the door and opened it. Just before I stepped through, I looked at her over my shoulder. "I love you. Let that count as the first toward whatever number it takes to convince you I speak the truth."

She lifted her chin. "What if I don't know how long it'll take?"

"As I told you once, I have the advantage of time. I can wait."