Chapter Five

CHAPTER FIVE

BEAU

R ain on a wedding day is supposed to be good luck. A loud crack of angry thunder rushes through the house just as we finish getting dressed for the wedding. Summer in Florida can guarantee about two things—rain in the afternoon and oppressive heat with humidity that resembles a dip in a swimming pool. Either way you’re getting wet.

“That doesn’t sound good.” Trevor comes out of his bedroom, dressed in a beautiful navy-blue suit, hair loose and just barely brushing his shoulders. His beauty stills me, just for a moment, until I force myself back into action.

“It’s good luck, isn’t it?”

Trevor smirks, eyes crinkling at the corners. “I’m not sure that’s actually true.”

My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I let out a frustrated huff. Andy’s harsh cries filter through the phone speakers, causing emotions to ricochet through me. Trevor winces and comes to stand beside me in the kitchen. His presence calms my already alert nerves.

“Beau.” Andy sniffles a few times. “It’s ruined!”

“It’s not, Andy. The wedding is in two hours, it’ll be over by then.”

“But the chairs will be all wet!”

“Trevor and I will come wipe them down. Don’t you worry about it. Stop crying, Mom will be so upset if your makeup looks bad.”

“I don’t have any makeup on yet.” Andy cries harder into the phone.

My sister crying has always torn me to pieces. I look helplessly out the window at the angry storm clouds in the sky. If only I had the power to make them disappear. Brothers should have that power.

“Andy, I promise. We’ll figure it out. Trevor and I will leave now, and make sure everyone’s got a plan B. You don’t worry about it at all.”

Andy’s sniffles soften, until she’s just barely hiccuping. “Okay.”

“I’ll see you soon. Stop worrying.”

I hang up with a sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose hard. Jesus.

Trevor slings his suit jacket on a hanger, then wrangles me out of my own to hang it up as well. He aims one of his comforting, sweet smiles at me.

“Let’s go save the day.”

And that’s what we do. The rain ends just as we arrive at the farm. The day is hazy, a mist hanging overhead, but the rain clouds look like they’re gone as we get to work. An hour passes us by as we wipe down every single chair until they’re mostly dry for the guests.

The trees drip moisture as they sway in the wind but I’m placing my bets on us finishing our task before the wedding starts in an hour. Thirty minutes until people start arriving to take their seats. It’ll work out. It has to work out.

Trevor and I hustle back to the truck to slide on our suit jackets. He carefully helps me into mine, fingers lingering along my broad shoulders as he brushes his hands over my chest to straighten it out. Next, he fixes my tie so that it’s lying flat. His baby blues flit up to my gaze. With a nod, he clucks his tongue approvingly. Something in his eyes makes my knees go just a little weak.

“You look perfect,” Trevor tells me, voice warm and low.

I swallow, my mouth suddenly dry. “You too, sweetheart.”

Trevor chuckles softly before pulling away, his gaze far away despite being right in front of me. “Let’s do this.”

After helping Trevor to his seat, I leave him in the capable hands of Harper. To the back, the little barn has two sides, one for a bride and one for a groom, so I make my way into the bride’s suite. I shield my eyes as I enter so I can’t see the ladies half-dressed.

“Can I look? Everyone dressed?”

A round of laughs echo around the room.

“You can look, Beau,” Mama says from the other side of the room.

With a bashful smile I remove my hand from my eyes to survey the room. A few of my female cousins and Andy’s friends wave at me from where they stand in their blush-pink bridesmaids dresses.

But my gaze lasers in on my beautiful little sister. Her hair falls down her back in soft waves over the ivory lace body-hugging bridal gown. I remember when she gripped my hand tight before jumping into the springs, when she had no front teeth, and when she was impossible to find while playing hide-and-seek. She’s all grown up now. Lost to me.

“You look beautiful, Andy.”

Andy’s smile is watery. “Don’t make me cry, Beau.”

“I won’t.” Kissing her warm cheek, I steel myself against the tears wanting so badly to fall. “Everything’s all ready for you. Are you ready?”

The bridesmaids around the room sigh dreamily for Andy. We all help her get outside, avoiding the wettest spots around the farm. I squint to make sure that Ethan is already waiting with his groomsmen, and when I see he’s there, I hold on to Andy’s hand and wait for her bridesmaids to walk ahead of us.

Dad stands from the chair in the back row we’d saved for him. His breaths are a little short and pained as he takes Andy’s hand. I kiss his cheek but let him take over for Andy. I run up the outside of the row to join Trevor at the front.

“She’s all good?” Trevor whispers against my cheek as he kisses me.

“Perfect.”

I take his hand in my own, twining our fingers as the wedding march floats through the trees. Everyone stands to watch my beautiful sister walk down the aisle. I do my best to hold back tears, but I’ve never been really good at keeping them from falling. My face is a mess by the end of the ceremony. Thank God I had the forethought to bring a handkerchief. I roughly wipe at my face as Andy and Ethan kiss.

“Top ten best weddings I’ve ever been to,” Trevor says, voice a little raw.

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. So much love here.” Trevor places a hand over his heart, eyes misty. “I can feel it. You guys are a real family.”

“What about your family?” I ask because I’m curious to know about him.

His face shutters closed. “My family is nothing like this.”

“I’m sorry.”

Trevor’s face transforms to hide every ounce of sadness. I can’t explain why but that sends a pang of my own sadness through me. To know he’s hiding from me, pretending. He might just be my fake boyfriend, but all I know how to do is care for people. The urge to pry him apart, know his tells, know what could ever make him sad, is so great that it almost threatens to boil over.

“Now we party,” I tell him.

Another earth-shattering grin is aimed my way. My heart does a little skip in my chest. I try to ignore it, but it’s hard to do that when Trevor is so perfect. But I do my best to remind myself he’s being paid to be perfect.

I love my family, but they’re loud and obnoxious. Even more so at events like a wedding where there’s an excuse for loudness. Probably why I’ve spent much of my life on the outskirts, always being the helper, because after a few hours with them, my head pounds. It does now too, but everything’s a little better with Trevor by my side. In an unexpected turn of events, Harper and Trevor might actually be becoming friends.

Which is dangerous if Harper finds out what Trevor does for a living. Because Harper cannot keep a secret. That boy has looser lips than a bullfrog on a lily pad.

Trevor’s deep laugh breaks me from my reverie. He’d wandered to the bar to get us both a beer, but he was stopped by Colby. I use his distraction as a chance to take Trevor in when he’s not keen to my assessing gaze. Suit jacket off, on the seat beside me, so his strong shoulders are on display. Trevor’s not short, probably average height for a guy. He’s muscled too, the kind from the gym. And his smile is wide and sure in a way that says it doesn’t take much to fake being a nice guy.

Sensing my stare, his warm gaze slides over the crowd to meet mine. My heart does another one of those traitorous rolls and bursts in my chest. His eyes soften, and he bites his lip, then hurriedly ends his conversation with Colby. All to come back to me. To take a seat beside me with a tired release of breath.

“Weddings are so much work,” Trevor informs me, sliding me a still-cold beer despite him being waylaid by Colby.

Leaning back in my chair, I take a slow sip. People are eating and mingling, but I know the dancing will start soon. My sister is a family girl to the roots, so she used our distant cousins' bluegrass band for the reception. Notes from the guitars and banjos waft over us, easing my discomfort from all the people around me.

“How are you doing?” Trevor asks softly.

His fingers come up to play with the hairs at the nape of my neck, sending jolts of lightning throughout every one of my extremities. Touch has always been a double-edged sword for me. At times I crave it, but at other times it makes me uncomfortable. Probably why I’ve never been a one-night-stand type of guy. A stranger's touch usually makes me feel like I’ve lost something. But Trevor’s touch is a steadying pressure, dancing along all the good nerve endings in my brain.

“I’m alright,” I whisper back.

Trevor tips his beer back to take a taste, showing off the arch of his elegant throat. He carefully surveys the crowd, then zeros in on the dance floor. “What are the odds of getting you on the dance floor with me later?”

“Pretty good after one or two more beers.”

“Good to know.”

“So, you’re in school. What do you want to do?”

“I’m getting a psychology degree.”

“That’s a lot,” I admit honestly.

Trevor kicks me softly under the table, lips tilting up in a smile. “Sometimes. And you? You’ll run the farm until you retire?”

I nod as I take a sip of my beer. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted. It’s what I know.”

“Nothing bad about that.”

Humming softly in agreement, I push my beer away from me. Angling my head towards him, faces only inches apart, I easily hold his gaze. From this close, I can clearly hear the sharp intake of breath from Trevor, like my proximity can still shock him. A stray lock of his hair tickles my chin. The golden strand twists easily around my finger, so soft, like the silky petal of a sunflower. I tug gently, then move it away, tucking the strand back in with the rest of his hair. Softly, and slow enough so he can track my movements, I skim my fingers down the length of his arm, coming to rest at the curve of his elbow.

“Trevor,” I say softly, an edge of need in my voice.

“Oh boy.” A shiver rolls through him, and he squeezes his eyes tightly shut. “You said no sex.”

“We can do a lot of things that bring pleasure without having sex.”

Trevor’s pupils blow wide at my words, swallowing up his gorgeous baby blues. Deft fingers twitch in my hair, grip tight, then tug me close enough that our lips are only a whisper apart.

“Beau,” Trevor murmurs, lips softly grazing mine. An almost kiss. A blink-and-you-miss-it kind of kiss. An I need more, just the hint of a kiss.

“Hiya,” a voice says loudly from behind us.

I don’t pull away from Trevor. Instead, I just turn my head to take in Harper. The man doesn’t look remotely guilty for interrupting us. Actually, he looks pleased-as-punch. The brat.

“They’re going to cut the cake soon,” Harper announces with a knowing grin.

“Okay,” I tell him, hoping he’ll disappear.

Harper wiggles his fingers at me in the imitation of a wave. “Just thought you’d want to know.”

I stare daggers at Harper's back as he disappears towards his edge of the table. Trevor’s wearing a teasing smile as his gaze follows Harper through the crowd.

“You look so familiar.”

I turn my gaze to the other side of the table to find one of Ethan’s family members standing, gaze calculating where it falls on Trevor.

Trevor swallows, but his smile is pasted on. “I have one of those faces.”

The man cocks his head. “No, I’ve definitely seen you before. What’s your line of work?”

“I don’t work. I’m in college,” Trevor says, voice cold and distant. I’ve never heard his voice like that before, not sure I ever want to hear it again.

“Wait… aren’t you?—”

“I think that’s enough,” Trevor interrupts, eyes full of fire.

The man’s gaze pings between me and Trevor again, taking in Trevor’s fingers in my hair, the proximity of our bodies. A mean smirk curls the man’s lips to the side, but I stare at him with every ounce of fuck off my body can muster. He holds up his hands in defeat and backs away towards the table at the other side of the barn.

When I turn back to Trevor, his eyes are closed tight. His fingers drop slowly from my hair. An ache the size of a canyon opens inside of me just at the loss of his sweet touch. He firmly cups the bottle of beer in both palms and returns his calculating gaze to the wedding guests.

“Trevor,” I plead, needing to have his attention back on me.

He shoots me a half smile. “It’s okay, Beau.”

The problem is that I can already somehow see through his carefully constructed defenses. A little hitch to his voice tells me that for a second, he was vulnerable, and he didn’t really enjoy the feeling. A little furrow forms between his brows, his mouth twitches at one corner as he attempts to fake a painted-on smile. But I know and maybe that’s enough for now.

Time ticks by slowly. I mingle with my annoying family since I’m the epitome of a good southern boy. Trevor gives everyone his most award-winning smile while plastered to my side. But something changed after the interaction with that man earlier. I wish I could go back to before Harper interrupted us. I wish I could go back. The band switches to a drowsy love song, once everyone is winding down for the night. I take that as my chance.

I find Trevor happily chatting with Harper at the edge of the barn. Holding out my hand, I patiently wait for him to slip his hand into mine. His eyes flit from my hand and up to my eyes in question. One of those sweet smiles tilts the edges of his lips up, and his eyes sparkle just enough to make me smile in return. When he slips his hand into mine, I feel like I could spin the earth backwards like Superman.

We bump into a few dancing couples as I guide us through the swaying bodies on the dance floor, until we’re at the very center. I tug him into the cage of my arms so that he’s flush against my body. No place we don’t touch, but it’s still not enough.

His hair is a little sweaty from the heat inside the barn, curling up slightly where it brushes his shoulders. Suit jacket abandoned long ago; his shirt sleeves are rolled up to show his forearms. He’s achingly beautiful, perfect for me.

Swaying off beat to the calming wedding music, I tug him closer with a tight grip on his slim hips. His skin is warm even under his dress shirt, burning against the warmth of my palms. He fits so easily against me, like he was made for me. Such a dangerous thought.

“Beau,” Trevor says my name like a dreamy sigh. He loosely loops his arms around my shoulders, fingers tangling together against the nape of my neck.

I’ve always been a big guy, in size, and in nature. People count on me. They know that I’m going to take care of them and get things done. Call Beau is the motto I’ve heard most of my life. And I wish for just a moment that Trevor felt he could call on me. That he could count on me. I bet every guy that gets him for even a moment feels the same way.

Song after song, we stay silent, just basking in the moment together. So wrapped up in Trevor, in his soft gaze, I don’t even realize the barn is slowly emptying.

“Andy and Ethan are leaving,” Colby whispers, seemingly ashamed for interrupting us. I shoot him a shaky smile to let him know the interruption is fine.

Keeping Trevor’s hand tight inside my own, I lead us outside to watch my sister drive off with her new husband. Andy gives me a sweaty, and too-tight hug. Kissing her cheek, I give her the same wink that used to make her giggle as a toddler. But she doesn’t giggle, she just shakes her head at me before disappearing into the badly decorated car. The headlights disappear down the dirt road and a weird pang of loss reverberates through me.

“Take me home?” Trevor asks quietly, fingers still gently holding on to mine.

“Anything you want, sweetheart.”

The drive back to the house is silent. I keep Trevor’s hand in mine the entire way, resting our joined hands against my thigh. Every now and then I swipe my thumb against his knuckles, and Trevor lets out a soft sigh at the sweeping touch. I wonder how often he’s touched just for the sake of being touched. Do people make him feel pleasure because his pleasure means more to them than their own? I doubt it.

In some unspoken agreement, Trevor quietly follows me to my room once we’re back home. Tenderly cupping his face in my palms, I press a lingering kiss on his forehead as he grabs my wrists so tight that ripples of pain course through me. I trail kisses down his face, finally nudging his chin with my nose so he tips his head back, giving me better access to the beautiful expanse of his throat.

And that’s the way it goes. Finding and kissing every inch of skin I can will be my night's mission. Slowly, I unbutton his dress shirt, and watch as it falls to the floor in a puddle of expensive fabric. Trevor’s chest heaves once he’s down to just his boxers. Bare to me, every glorious inch of perfect skin for me.

“Take a shower with me?”

Trevor blinks syrupy slow at me, caught in the haze of desire. “Is sex on the table now?”

I shake my head. “Nope. Follow my lead.”

“Alright,” Trevor whispers, a little unsure, with a hint of color on his cheeks.

When I go to take my clothes off, Trevor pauses me with a hand on my stomach. His stormy eyes freeze me. My heart does somersaults in my chest as I watch him carefully undress me, cautiously, like he’s afraid to cross some unknown line. Once I’m down to my underwear, his eyes take me in, before trailing slowly back up to meet my gaze. The moment is fraught with tension, sizzling with heat that I need to dial down to survive the night I have planned so carefully in my head.

I guide him into the bathroom with a hand on his naked back, his skin burning hot against my own. Steam fills the room quickly, ratcheting up the heat rolling from us both in waves.

“Naked or with underwear on?” I ask him softly, trying to give him the upper hand.

Trevor aims a wry smile my way, but it doesn’t quite reach his baby blues. “We can be naked without jumping one another, right?”

“I think so.”

Slipping out of our underwear, we keep our eyes firmly above shoulder level like we’re in the locker room. The shower is perfunctory. We take turns under the water, washing our hair, then finally our bodies. Afterwards, I wrap a towel around his shoulders with another kiss to his forehead. His wet hair hangs around his shoulders, with a few knots, so I gently run my fingers through the fine golden strands. His eyes fall closed at my touch, lips tilting up slightly at my devoted attention.

My feet follow Trevor to the bedroom of their own accord. He drops the towel, leaving him naked for my viewing. He’s beautiful, just miles of flawless skin, and an absolutely wicked smirk that leaves me all sorts of breathless. With a grin so wide my cheeks ache, I lift him up, and toss him onto the bed. A breathless little laugh leaves him as I tuck us under the pile of quilts. I pull him to me, bare skin against bare skin, then sweetly tangle my fingers in his damp hair.

“Can I kiss you?”

“ Please kiss me,” Trevor begs, every word filled with intent.

Begging is always my greatest undoing. I press my lips to his gently at first, learning the weight of his lips, the softness of his mouth. His fingers bite into my back as he inches just a bit closer to me, close enough I can feel his hard cock against my thigh. Fucking him would be amazing, but it’s not my mission for the night. I want to show him what I want, what I need, and that’s simply just to kiss him, to hold him through the night. I’m a simple man.

Trevor whimpers into my mouth as I trail my fingers over his overheated skin. A deep shiver wracks his body when I softly dance my fingers right back up the slight curve of his spine. I keep up the swirling dance of my fingers during the slow slide of our lips. Softly flicking my tongue against his lips, he easily opens up for me. I reach up to pinch his chin, angling his head to deepen the kiss so I can taste all of him. He tastes like wedding cake and beer and something else that’s entirely Trevor. Something spicy, but sweet at the same time.

I soften the kiss again, until our lips are just barely grazing each other. A gentle press of my mouth to his own. Trevor’s an amazing kisser. Just the right amount of tongue, right amount of tease, the right amount of everything. Time loses all meaning during our endless kiss. The kiss continues even as he rolls on top of me, strong thighs bracketing my waist, his hands gripping the headboard so tight that his knuckles turn white.

He pulls away from my mouth with trembling thighs and I grip them tight, letting my thumb dip into the curve of his abdominal muscles. His skin is perfectly soft under my hands. Resting his forehead against mine he releases a slightly panicked laugh.

“You’re gonna kill me,” Trevor whispers.

His words carry an odd sense of relief.

I lean up to kiss him again. “Nah. Want to stop and go to bed? Kiss some more? Whatever you want, it’s yours.”

Trevor doesn’t answer with words, instead he just presses his sweet mouth back to mine. Chest to chest, his heartbeat wild against my own. Our hard cocks slide together, the friction delicious and almost unbearable. Shocks of pleasure race down my spine, urging me to seek relief.

But we both ignore our desire because that’s not the focus of our kisses. The focus is the sweet molasses-slow intensity of kissing someone just to kiss them. No rush, no urgency, just lips sliding against lips. Only the tender onslaught of want and need and the decadent knowledge that, even if only for a moment, our mouths belong to one another.

His kiss grows softer as he rests heavier against me, half asleep from our lazy kissing. Pulling away, I tenderly rain kisses over his cheeks, his forehead, his closed eyes. Rolling him over, I pull him against my side until his head is safely tucked into the crook of my neck, his thigh thrown haphazardly over my hip.

Warm gusts of his breath tickle my neck as he seemingly breathes me in, his fingers play with the hair just below my belly button, causing sparks of pleasure to dance along my skin. All tangled together is how we fall asleep, slowly and then all at once. And I try to pretend that my heart isn’t galloping away at the idea of letting him walk away in the morning.