8. Rachel

CHAPTER 8

RACHEL

I wrap my fingers around my coffee mug and smile at Lani. I’m so glad she could meet me today. She’s been so busy with classes and her dissertation, she hasn’t had much time to spare. But when I told her I was in town, she offered to meet me for coffee.

We’ve managed to secure the corner couches at Java Jeans, and even though I’m only twenty-four, I’m feeling ancient as I watch these college students traipse in and out the door.

Lani smiles and waves at a few of them.

“Students,” she murmurs before sipping her coffee, then breaking off a piece of muffin. “So, how’s the adoption thing going?”

“Well, we’ve started the process.” I bulge my eyes. “I had no idea how much paperwork there was to deal with. So many forms, plus interviews. They really vet you hard.”

“Any hiccups?”

“Everything has mostly gone okay. We got an adoption grant, which covers two-thirds of the cost.” I grin, a thrill buzzing through me over how easily that all came together. It was like a little miracle. Like the universe was telling us we’re on the right track. “We had a home visit the other day and their only big concern is our living situation. I don’t think they’re too keen on us raising a baby on the top floor of a bed-and-breakfast.” I frown. “I know it’s unconventional. Liam and I are trying to figure out what to do. We can’t really afford to buy a house yet. I mean, we could find a little rental somewhere, I guess, but?—”

“Why don’t you move into the pool house? It’s got that cute little yard out back, and now that Baxter’s finished the renovations, it’s plenty big enough for a small family.”

“But you and Asher live in there.”

“We can move upstairs. That way, you’re in a separate living space, which is way more conventional, and it’s farther from the guests.”

“That’s true.” I tip my head. “You sure you wouldn’t mind that, though?”

“Not at all. The noise doesn’t travel up there too badly, does it?”

“No, I tend to put couples on the floor just below us and families go below them, so things are usually pretty quiet on the top floor, and I trust you and Asher not to crash around and disturb our guests…” My expression crumples. “I just don’t want to inconvenience you guys.”

“It’s really not a big deal.” She grins, and I love her more today than I did yesterday.

“Thank you so much. That would be amazing.”

“I’ll obviously double-check with Asher, but I’m sure he won’t mind. Are there any other factors that are making the adoption agency hesitant?”

I take another sip of coffee, draining my mug before setting it down on the coffee table. “I think they’re also worried about me working long hours while trying to raise a kid. They know that Liam’s a police officer and I manage the villa, plus run the kitchen.”

“Yeah, but you’re not in sole charge. Plus, you could hire someone to make the team a little bigger. You could also ask Alonso if he’d be willing to be on call sometimes so it’s not always on you. That way, when Liam’s on night shift, you can focus solely on the baby and not have to worry about it. That’s no big deal at all.”

I purse my lips, thinking it through. “Alonso only lives five minutes away. That’s a really good suggestion.”

“Plus, Asher lives on-site, and you know how much he loves to jump in and help when there’s an emergency.” She winks and laughs, obviously loving that about him.

“You’re probably right about hiring another person to help in the kitchen, though. That would definitely lighten my load.” I wince. “Although, I’ll need Asher’s help in picking someone. I totally screwed up with my last hire.”

She gives me a kind smile, reaching forward to pat my arm. “That’s because you have such a gentle heart.”

“I couldn’t bring myself to fire her.” I cringe, then tip my head back. “Thank God she quit.”

“Yeah, well, maybe she could see the writing on the wall.” Lani bulges her eyes, and we both end up laughing.

Relief pulses through me at how I dodged that bullet. Conflict is so not my forte. I wish I had some of Mikayla’s fire or Lani’s ability to put people in their place. She has this way of being so elegantly cutting when she wants to be. I would love to be able to stay that composed and assertive at the same time.

She really is a phenomenal woman. All of my friends are wonderful. I never thought moving to Nolan would expand my friend group this way, but Mick and I have found such a home with these people, and each new person who came into Hockey House just seemed to fit.

My eyes dart to the coffee table as I think about Caroline and how I haven’t spoken to her since she announced her pregnancy. Shit. I am such a bad friend. I totally ghosted her back in January. Even after guilt got the better of me, I couldn’t find the courage to return her call, and since then I’ve been busy with the adoption stuff. I need to get over myself and check on her.

Chewing my bottom lip, I wrinkle my nose and glance at Lani.

“Hey, um… how’s Caroline doing?”

Lani gives me a gentle smile. “She’s good. Things are busy with the kids and…” She hesitates and I nod, gripping my mug and willing myself to ask.

“And the pregnancy?”

“Baby and mama are both healthy.”

“Cool.” I bob my head, then stop when I notice Lani’s pained expression. “What?”

“They’re having a girl.”

“Really?” I sit up with a smile. “Wow, she must be so happy.”

“She is.”

“Then why are you frowning?”

“I just feel bad that… she didn’t tell you. I mean, she wanted to, but she’s so aware of your situation, and she hasn’t wanted to upset you.”

Guilt simmers through me. “I get it. She’s been so understanding, and I’m grateful. I need to… call her or something. I’ve been a terrible friend.”

“No.” Lani reaches for me, shuffling on the couch so she can sit closer. “Don’t say that. She understands, and she’s not mad at you over it. She just wishes this could be happening for you too. She knows how badly you want kids. She gets that her accidentally getting pregnant must be a punch to the gut for someone who has been trying for so long.”

I blink, unbidden tears quickly rising. I fight them off as best I can.

“I’m sure she’d appreciate a phone call from you when you’re ready. Maybe you could tell her about the adoption and stuff.”

“Who knows how long that’s going to take,” I murmur, not wanting to be a pessimist but also trying to be realistic.

“Yeah, well, good things take time.” Lani squeezes my wrist.

I glance at her, loving how caring she is and needing to end our coffee catch-up on a better note. She has to go soon, and I can’t have us shuffling out of here all down in the dumps.

How can I brighten things up?

Changing the subject is a must, but…

“What’s going on?” Lani frowns at me.

“Huh?”

“You have this look on your face like you want to tell me something, but you’re not sure if you should.”

“Oh. No.” I shake my head with a soft laugh. “I was just wanting to end things on a better note and was scrambling to think of a subject change.”

Her brown gaze softens with understanding. “It’s okay to be sad. We can share that together. I’m here for you… whatever mood you’re in.”

“I know.” I grab her hand in appreciation. “But I don’t want to walk out of here with a gray cloud hanging over me, so let’s talk about something uplifting, like… weddings or… proposals or—” I quickly swallow, silently cursing my stupid mouth.

Lani gives me a questioning frown. “Proposals?”

Of course she was going to pick up on that. I couldn’t have just shut up after saying the word weddings ? We could be talking about Baxter and Tammy right now, about how we’re both bridesmaids. We could be planning another bachelorette party for our friend. But no, of course I had to say proposals , and she had to notice that I said the P-word, and now she’s wondering who I’m talking about and?—

“How did you know I was thinking of proposing to Asher? I haven’t told anyone.”

“What?” I whip around to gape at her. “You are?”

“Ye-ah.” She drags out the word and points at me. “What are you talking about?”

“Nothing,” I squeak.

“Rachel.” Lani’s teacher voice is just a touch scary, and I end up swallowing.

Then I quickly blurt, “The fact that Tammy told me that Baxter told her that Asher wants to surprise you with a proposal.”

Lani goes still, blinking for a second, before crossing her arms with a sly smile. “Does he now?”

I gasp, my eyes bulging. “I’m so dead if he finds out that I let it slip! You can’t tell him that you know!”

Her smirk grows a little bigger, her eyes gleaming. “He’s trying to surprise me, huh?”

“Yes.” I wince, then grab her wrist. “You can act surprised, right? Just pretend I didn’t say anything.”

“Or I could surprise him first.” Her sharp gaze zeros in on my face. “Do you know when he’s planning to propose?”

I shake my head, panic coursing through me at what I might have just started. Why did I say anything?

Ugh!

Lani’s eyes are sparking with determination as her phone dings. She checks the screen, then jolts from her seat. “I’ve gotta run. A student is waiting to see me about his assignment. But I’ll catch you again soon.”

“Okay.” I give her a nervous smile. “You won’t give away the fact that I told you about Asher’s surprise?”

“No way.” She grins, lightly kissing my cheek. “I’m grateful.”

“But…”

She walks away before I can say anything else.

Crap.

Slumping back in my seat, I frown at my empty coffee mug and close my eyes. All I can hope is that I haven’t gone and rocked too many boats with my little slipup.