19. Luke

19

luke

By the time I met up with Joel and headed into the city, River had already texted us that the crisis had been adverted and to meet them at an entirely different bar about a fifteen-minute walk from where they were supposed to be.

That was not even close to enough information on what the fuck had happened, and both Joel and I were on edge by the time we crossed into the city.

“He didn’t tell you anything?” Joel asked for the hundredth time.

“No,” I snapped. “Just like the last time you asked. That’s all I know.”

I winced at my tone, but my nerves were as shot as Joel’s, maybe even more so because it was both River and Cameron, and I had no idea how to manage my worry for my son and my . . . lover? Boyfriend? Fuck, we needed to talk about labels at some point.

“Sorry,” Joel said after a moment of silence. “I know you told me everything you know. It’s just . . . after the last month or so, I can’t help but assume the worst.”

“Trust me, I know.”

Joel reached over and squeezed my hand. “Right. Of course you do. I didn’t mean to imply otherwise.”

I sighed. This wasn’t getting us anywhere. “What are we? Like, the three of us?”

It wasn’t the question I’d meant to ask, but it was out there now, so I had no plans on taking it back.

Joel didn’t answer immediately, which I appreciated. “Well . . . you and I are boyfriends, or mates if you want to use that term. The same for Cam and me. You and Cam, I think that’s a conversation the two of you should probably have, but I personally feel like we’re all together in a relationship.”

I nodded as I tried to find an open parking garage. “Yeah, I think I feel like that too, or we’re at least getting there.”

“We are. We’re good together, the three of us. Don’t you agree?”

“I do. I would never have thought so, but we work.”

“Good. Then you should probably talk to Cameron, especially if you want to have some kind of label. I’m not sure if he’d ever push for that.”

It probably shouldn’t matter what we called ourselves, but despite all the changes that had happened recently, there was still a part of me that was a traditionalist and wanted a word to attach to how I felt about these men. I wanted to be able to call them something when talking to people without always stumbling over titles. It was important to me.

We finally parked, and all that was pushed to the side now that I was close to seeing Cameron and learning what had happened. The tension was back in Joel too, and we were both quiet as we walked the few blocks to the bar.

I noticed that Joel was limping, but I didn’t say anything about it. I didn’t think he’d appreciate the reminder that he was infallible right about now. I was still concerned though. It seemed like he’d been struggling with his back for weeks now, since he’d carried Cameron, and ignoring it wasn’t helping. I gave myself a mental reminder to ask about it tomorrow, once whatever this was had been settled.

We both paused in front of the door of the bar or club—I honestly wasn’t even sure what it was, but I could hear the pounding bass of the music from out here. Still, there was no line, just one bouncer checking IDs, and a bored looking woman in tiny shorts and a long-sleeved crop top taking payments, so whatever it was, at least it probably wasn’t crowded.

“Why do I feel like we’re going to be old enough to be most of these kids’ grandparents?” Joel asked from the side of his mouth. I snorted. He wasn’t wrong.

The bouncer didn’t seem bothered though, probably just happy he didn’t have to scan our IDs, and the woman only cared that our money was good. Soon, we were inside, and yeah, I’d never felt older in my life.

“Riv said they’re by the bar in the back!” I shouted to Joel, who tilted his head in acknowledgement, and we started to make our way there.

It was less crowded back here, and the music wasn’t as loud, probably why they’d chosen this place. I smiled when I saw them, the knot in my gut unfurling once my eyes were on them. Cameron’s back was to us, but he was moving his hands animatedly as he talked, his fruity drink sloshing a bit from the movement. He didn’t look hurt or even upset. River was leaning against the bar facing us. He was smiling at whatever Cameron was telling him and also looked unscathed.

“They seem fine, right?” I asked Joel hopefully, wanting him to confirm.

“Yeah, they do.”

River noticed us first, obviously. He must say something to Cameron because he whirled around, his face lighting up when he saw us. It wasn’t just for Joel, either. I saw when his gaze landed on me, and he was just as happy about me being there as Joel. It made me feel all fluttery inside, like I was teenager again about to ask Sharon Johnson to prom.

He bounced away from River and launched himself at both of us. Standing on his tiptoes, he kissed me and then Joel. “You came!” He seemed genuinely surprised, which pissed me off. When had Joel and I not come when he’d asked for us.

“Of course we came, caro ,” Joel told him, clearly having the same train of thought. “We will always show up for you.”

Cameron tilted to the side, like he’s trying to comprehend this. Then he finally smiled “I’ll always be here for you guys too.” He waved his drink at us. “These aren’t as good as the ones at the first place,” changing the subject, “They don’t even have pineapple, but they’re strong as fuck. C’mon, you have to try one.”

He led us back to the bar, and before I could ask what was going on or greet River, Cameron leaned over the bar and asked for two more of whatever sugary crap he was drinking.

He was so excited for us to try them that I didn’t have the heart to say no, and apparently neither did Joel because we both took a sip at the same time. River started to crack up.

“Damn, I guess you really are gone over Cam. Never in my life did I think I’d see you drink anything but beer and straight whiskey.”

I made a face at my son. I didn’t want him to hurt Cameron’s feelings, even if he was right. Cameron either didn’t hear or care because he grabbed Joel’s hand and started to drag him away from the bar. “C’mon, Daddy, let’s dance so River can talk about all the serious crap.”

Joel wanted to know the serious crap too, but instead of pushing, he tipped Cameron’s head up and looked in his eyes. Whatever he saw must’ve satisfied him because he just wrapped an arm around him and kissed the side of his head. “Okay, lead the way, baby boy.” He shot a look over his shoulder at me that said fill me in later .

“Don’t be too long, Luke! I wanna dance with you too,” Cameron shouted, and I tried not to grimace. He did not want to see me dance. No one did. But I’d already learned that it was nearly impossible to say no to Cameron, so I’d likely be dancing for the first time since my wedding.

River was laughing so hard, he almost spit out his beer. “Oh my gods, I am so recording this and showing Lake and Essie. They’ll never believe me otherwise.”

I knocked him with my shoulder. “Cut it out.” River pulled out his phone and shoved it in my face, showing me a picture he’d already taken of me drinking this blue crap. How had I not seen him doing that?

“Think of it as practice for my and Lake’s weddings.” I was not dancing at either of those, so he could forget it.

“You gonna tell me what’s going on or just make fun of me?”

That sobered him up real quick. While this part of the club was much quieter than the front, it still wasn’t conducive to serious conversation, but he gave me the quick and dirty details, enough for me to understand that fucker Riley had shown up and tried to undersell the severity of what he’d done. It made me want to storm back to the other bar and find him, but the boys had already handled it. I had to be patient, follow Cameron’s lead, and wait till the cops finally had enough evidence to arrest their asses.

“Thanks for getting him out of there,” I told River.

“Yeah, that was almost as much for me as it was for Cam. I would’ve killed the asshole if I’d stayed.” I understood that feeling.

I didn’t have a chance to talk more about it, though, because Cameron was back and dragging me and River to the dance floor, where Joel was waiting for us in amusement.

Dancing was low on my list of things I wanted to do. Dancing with my son? Even lower, and I was pretty sure River felt the same with the way he kind of hovered over to the side. He probably was wishing Cooper were here, or at least someone else to act as a buffer. Still, Cameron looked so fucking happy to have us all there that there was no way in hell I was leaving.

He kept things a lot more PG than I’d expected, probably for River’s sake, but I was still a man, so when Joel came up behind me and held me close so that my ass was right up against the bulge in his jeans, my own dick began to take notice. When Cameron wrapped his arms around me so I was sandwiched between us, yeah, it was hard to get it under control.

I gripped Cameron’s hips low and just grazing the top of his ass. Maybe that drink had been stronger than I’d thought because I sure as hell felt drunk as I attempted to sway to the music. I stared right into Cameron’s eyes, the moment heady as he stared back. I dipped my head, wanting to taste his lips. A hand gripped my shoulder.

River was watching me with a mixture of amusement and that look kids gave their parents when they were about to do something embarrassing. It had been a long time since any of mine had given me that look, though Ro was a fucking master at it.

“I’m gonna go. I ordered an Uber. It’ll be here in a few minutes.”

I frowned. “Shit, Riv, I’m sorry. We crashed your night.”

He waved the apology away. “Nah, it’s fine. You guys need this. Plus, I’m exhausted. I can’t hang anymore.”

“You realize Joel and I are a lot older than you, right?”

“Yeah, but you two don’t have a baby that hates sleep.”

True. “As long as you’re good?”

He smiled. “I am. Have fun and be safe!”

I rolled my eyes again. Had he always been such a smart ass? “You be safe too. Text me when you get home.”

“I will. Love you, Dad.”

“Love you too, kid.”

It was pretty shitty, but once River was out of sight, it felt like all our inhibitions disappeared. It didn’t matter that we were still surrounded by people—it was only the three of us.

I’d been right about Cameron keeping things PG for River’s sake because as soon as he left, all bets were off. He was pressed so closely to me, if he were any closer, we’d probably meld into one person. My hands drifted lower so I was cupping his ass, and Joel began moving in a way that his dick kept dragging up and down along my ass.

Joel dipped his head down so his lips could brush against my neck. Cameron must’ve liked the idea because suddenly they were both working their magic lips up and down my throat and jawline, and I was losing my damn mind.

Cameron was grinding along my front, which was not helping me tame my erection at all, and I had a feeling he was well aware of that fact.

“Fuuuck. Cameron . . .” Joel sunk his teeth into the soft spot where my neck and shoulder met and I was a goner. We needed to leave and soon or I was going to embarrass myself.

Why had I ever been scared of this? It was hard to even remember all the things I’d been worried about when this all had started. I’d had concerns? I was sure they’d been valid, but at this point it could have just been nonsense. None of them would be enough now for me to give this up, not ever.

It was like Joel was in my head because just as the words crossed my mind, he shouted in my ear, “I love you, Luke! I think I’ve loved you for a long time.”

Somehow, Cameron heard him before I even registered it because he looked up, a combination of shock and excitement across his features. “I love you too, baby boy. I love you both so fucking much.”

Neither of us responded. I wanted to, but I kept choking on the words. Based on the way Joel held us tight and kissed us both, however, I could tell he understood.