Chapter 4

Chapter

Four

Autumn sat in a recliner on Aiden’s spacious Gulfstream, trying to ignore the huge presence of one Jarom Love seated far too close for her peace of mind. Of course he and her pilot friend Paul had hit it off at first handshake, talking about planes and flying.

Jarom was a pilot and a rock climber? She hadn’t known those impressive tidbits, and she thought she knew far too much about him. He’d started with shipping ventures like his father but then gained a huge social media following because of how charming and handsome and filthy rich he was. He’d ventured into men’s clothing, with himself as the designer, succeeding famously, and even had his own line of cologne. She’d smelled that delectable cologne when she tackled him in his closet. Faint wisps of it were drifting over her now.

It was too much. He was more than she’d bargained for, and she’d been prepared for an ultra-handsome, enticing charmer. How to stay strong? She hadn’t been prepared for a brave, mesmerizing, and caring Jarom.

Even though Paul had instructions to take his phone to Aiden’s tech team, Jarom charmed him into committing Aiden’s people to forward all contacts and communication to Autumn’s phone so he could deal with ‘business fires’.

Jarom enamored everyone, men and women alike. He reminded her of Aiden, but Aiden had the warrior angle and was as tough and battle savvy as he was world-famous charming. Jarom had pretty boy muscles and had proven himself brave, but unless he was hiding more than the rock climbing and pilot skills to his followers worldwide, she doubted he had combat training. She would have to defend him. She didn’t mind. It was a heady rush to be the woman protecting and defending a man the ilk of billionaire heartthrob Jarom Love.

But oh my, the way it felt to touch him, see that teasing glint in his eyes directed at her, hear his charming lines, banter with him, have him use endearing terms on her, gawk at those pretty boy muscles and blue eyes in real time… She caught herself before she fanned her face. Would she ever get the image of him shirtless out of her mind?

She gritted her teeth. Gah. How had he gotten under her skin so quick? Yes, she’d fan-girled about him, followed him on social media, thought the media was right and he was the hottest, kindest, and most eligible and charming bachelor in the universe, but what did that matter to her? She didn’t do relationships. She was tougher than most men in a fight, and more hardened emotionally than anybody she knew. She was closed off and didn’t let down her guard. Most people assumed her tough act was a front, but it was the flirting and teasing that was a front. Paul knew she’d had a rough childhood but not much more. Aiden, Paul, Nick and the others would be there for her, but nobody knew how cold and distant she was inside.

What if Jarom chinked through the iron surrounding her heart?

Deep breath. It wouldn’t happen. She needed to get back to teasing and taunting. Jarom knew she would never have a relationship, and he easily admitted he was a player with no interest in anything serious. What he’d suggested was an ideal set up. If only she could convince her heart to be relieved she had no chance with him.

“I should warn you that Easton Coleville has a huge crush on me, so you’d better lay off the flirtations when that tough, perfect bull rider is around.”

What was she saying? Taunting him to flirt more. Ridiculous … but far too thrilling.

Jarom turned toward her in his seat. “I absolutely thrive on a challenge, my love.” His smile came easily, but the effect on her heart was terrifying. “Easton is the cowboy I need to best for your heart? A bull rider? How fascinating.”

Oh, how she wished Jarom could fight for and win her heart. She’d gladly hand it to him. On a platter.

No. A player like him would pulverize her worse than Charles had.

“Nobody wins my heart,” she said. “I thought I explained earlier that it is encased in iron.”

“Ooh. Iron, is it? That sounds awful, my love. How do you survive?”

She purposely stiffened when she wanted to melt. She wasn’t his love. Was he not listening or was she not keeping up? She always kept up. They’d agreed to flirt and tease and not get invested. Right? How many times did she need to draw up parameters in her own mind?

“No gate or chink in that iron that I can pry open or melt with the blow torch of my fabulous wit and charm?” He pumped those perfect eyebrows.

Why did he have to look like a male model at all times? He was more appealing than any model. Jarom was real. Flesh and blood. She’d felt that flesh under her fingertips. Gripping her hands together, she barely restrained herself from reaching out.

“No gate. Solid iron. Impervious to blow torches.”

He studied her. His blue eyes were full of concern … for her.

Concern? Could she be reading that right? Concern from an accomplished flirt and womanizer? She thought the world of her bodyguard buddies but they learned quickly to treat her like one of them. She gave them a hard time and they responded in kind. After knowing her for a few months, they didn’t get in her way on jobs or express concern for her. Paul was the exception, but they had a long-standing friendship, and he was engaged. No threat.

But Jarom? Jarom was a threat.

She wasn’t around accomplished playboys often. That could be the problem. The other problem was that, despite being a womanizer, Jarom was genuine in his benevolent nature. How could that be? An ultra-wealthy, ultra-handsome, sought-after charming gentleman like him? He should be as conceited and uncaring as anyone in the universe, but he wasn’t.

“What happened to encase that beautiful heart of yours in iron, love?”

She could only stare at him. Her heart seemed to soften at the invested look in his brilliantly blue eyes. What was happening to her?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing could happen to her or between them. He was only messing with her, teasing her. She could not allow any barriers to crumble. She was the one who instigated the flirting and left men longing for her, not the other way around.

“Okay, Jarom, my friend. I thought you defined this, but you have to understand the parameters.”

“Do I now?” That smile played at the corners of his lips, and she’d never wanted to kiss someone so badly.

“Yes.” Desperation clawed at her insides. He had to not bring his blow torch to her iron heart or she’d be liquefied and reshaped before she knew what had happened. “I am a tough, sassy female bodyguard. I tease and flirt with everyone, but nobody gets past my wall. You are a handsome, charming, wealthy player who goes through multiple women per week. We both know who and what we are. We already committed to meaningless flirtations and no commitments. I will treat you the same way I treat every man. You will have no expectations of me falling for you, and I will return the favor. Savvy?”

She glared at him, silently daring him to contradict her.

Jarom simply raised his eyebrows. Then he casually reached over and took her left hand between both of his. She gasped in protest but didn’t pull away. Why didn’t she pull away? Because he was only flirting. It meant nothing.

He lifted her hand to his lips, turned it over, and pressed a heated kiss in the center of the palm.

Autumn quivered from the intensity and allure of that kiss. She all but melted into the seat. What made it worse was the intense and determined look in his blue eyes as he gazed at her from over the top of their joined hands.

“We’ll see,” he said .

Her eyes widened. She should pull her hand away and punch him. Hard. Her defense mechanism whenever she felt threatened.

He threaded their fingers together and rested their joined hands on his muscular thigh, gently trailing his thumb across the back of her hand.

Autumn found herself unable to breathe properly. She couldn’t think of a reply. She had no sass in her. She was a puddle of longing for this man who was as off limits to her as any man had ever been. He was even more charming and enticing than Charles. Jarom would melt the iron around her heart, waltz in, and then he’d destroy her when he realized how dark and ugly she was inside.

Holding her hand as casually as if they were dating, Jarom somehow made the experience feel comfortable and provocative and like a commitment all its own. She’d rarely held hands with a man. Sometimes a kiss at the end of a date, a hug, or a man would escort her with his hand on her lower back.

Why did holding hands with Jarom feel more significant than any other man’s touch? There was nothing threatening in his touch that would dredge up childhood fears as sometimes happened when men touched her. With Jarom, it was sheer pleasure but more meaningful. Holding hands with him blew past their non-commitment barriers and she didn’t even protest.

Her heart thrummed out of control as they soared toward Montana.

“Tell me all about Autumn Cardon.”

She stiffened and would’ve pulled her hand away, but he continued the tantalizing motion with his thumb moving across the surprisingly tender skin on the back of her hand. She couldn’t bring herself to miss out on the experience.

“Where did you grow up?”

“Detroit,” she murmured, the only thing she’d admit about her childhood. “What about you?” she asked, though she already knew far too much about him. Only child. Raised by loving billionaires. Had homes in Aspen, Spain, Playa Del Carmen, and Boca Ratan.

“Colorado Springs,” he said. “Is your family still in Detroit?”

“No idea,” she admitted.

Jarom’s blue eyes looked too perceptive. “What is your favorite part about your childhood?”

“That it’s over.” Her stomach turned over, and she yanked her hand free and clutched it with her own hand, trying to ignore the warm tingles he’d produced.

His eyes widened and he nodded. “Positive memories from your teenage years?”

Nothing positive. She had fought to stay off of her mom’s boyfriends’ radars, do good in school, and not have anyone notice the bruises her mom regularly left on her face, arms, and abdomen. Her mom regularly beat Autumn because her sleazebag boyfriends noticed her and a long list of other reasons that were always somehow Autumn’s fault.

“I had a neighbor who was an ultimate fighter. He taught me how to fight.” Jed had died of a brain aneurysm five years ago. He’d never been warm with her, but she still loved him more than her own mother. She’d never forget his kindness hiding her at his apartment and standing up for her when she couldn’t reach her safe space in her closet, and most importantly, teaching her how to protect herself. Her mom had stopped coming after her because of Jed. That had been one of the best days of her life. Mom had taken a swing at her. Autumn had caught her fist, spun her around, and slammed her into the fridge. ‘You’ll never touch me again,’ Autumn had said coldly. Her mom never had.

Autumn stuck out her chin, unsteady at what she was revealing and the memories. This was much deeper than any conversation she allowed with men. Even Paul and Aiden didn’t know how she had gotten her start.

“What did you enjoy in high school?” she asked, hoping to redirect.

“Dating,” he admitted. She thought he’d give her his usual sly smile, but he seemed disturbed by her omission. “And I was brilliant at water polo and mountain biking.”

“Water polo, mountain biking, and rock climbing? Some of the toughest sports out there. Makes sense why you’re built like Adonis or maybe Hercules.” She could’ve bitten her own tongue off. The grin that covered his face was too much to resist.

In her defense, they’d agreed to flirt and tease. That was all she was doing. She simply couldn’t let it mean anything.

“Thank you, love. Your beautiful face and shape put Aphrodite and Athena to shame.”

She smiled. “I always wanted to be Athena.”

“I can see that. She isn’t nearly beautiful enough for your angelic magnificence, but with your superior warrior skills she is an ideal fit. I’ll call you Athena if you like.”

“I’m not angelic.” Before he could protest, she went on, “You are the king of pet names, aren’t you? Where did you get that habit from? Just knowing it would entice women into falling for you?”

“I was a Casanova from day one. My mom says I claimed to have hundreds of girlfriends and would drop lines on girls and older women alike.” His lips lifted in an appealing smirk. “Also, my mom is the queen of pet names. ‘Sugar, sweetheart, pumpkin, darling, lovey, honey …’ The list goes on.”

Autumn smiled back at him, though her stomach turned over uncomfortably. Of course his mom was a sweetie and adored him. Even if they hadn’t set the parameters that they were only flirting and there was no chance of developing a relationship, she could never be the woman for a man like Jarom. He came from wholesome, happy, and inspired from heaven above. She came from evil, misery, and gunning for eternal torment. His mom would instantly dislike her just like Millie Coleville did.

“Tell me about how you became interested in the career of a female bodyguard,” Jarom insisted when she didn’t comment on his mom and pet names. “Because of your MMA neighbor?”

No way could she tell them how she’d dreamed of righting all the wrongs she’d seen and experienced during her childhood and teenage years. She’d done a lot of good, but it never seemed like enough.

“Yes, he started the seed. Then I was able to get into University of Michigan-Dearborn and they have an incredible law enforcement program.” She continued talking through being hired with the Detroit Police Department and then the FBI, working her way up before Aiden had stolen her two years ago after they’d worked together on a case. Of course the famed security expert had been impressed with her and had begged her to be on his team. Jarom didn’t tease her about that. He agreed with a complimentary smile on his face.

She told him more than she’d told anyone in her life. What was it? The comfortable airplane, nowhere to go, he was a good conversationalist, the captivated look in his blue eyes as if she was the most impressive and special woman on earth? Or was there something special about Jarom Love, a connection she could not explore?

“Aiden Porter. What a phenomenal mortal, eh? Well, some aren’t convinced he is mortal.” He grinned. “I’m sure he’s thrilled to have an exceptional female bodyguard on his roster. When you stood in for Lieutenant Hays West’s sister and Benjamin Oliver’s men captured you …”

She nodded; she remembered that op.

“I watched from the other side as Benjamin claimed his men would kill you to manipulate Hays and Elizabeth, but you …” He grinned. “I’ve never been so amazed. You looked half the size of your captor, but you winked at the camera, showed us your unbound hands, and took your kidnappers out. The camera unfortunately went haywire so we didn’t see it all, but we could hear it. You are simply incredible, my love.”

She basked in his praise and had no desire to tell him he couldn’t call her his love.

That was nuts—she’d never be his love, and she received high-level praise all the time. She was only twenty-eight and had career and field experience most in law enforcement and security only dreamed about. She knew part of her opportunity and success was her gender. She was a unicorn and criminals the world over had underestimated her, and upright law enforcement and security icons like Aiden competed to have her on their teams. Sutton Smith himself had contacted her, with Aiden’s permission, and explained he had a place for her if she was ever so inclined. She revered the legendary Smith, but she was loyal to Aiden.

“Thank you.” She looked him over. He was luscious to look at, but there was a lot more under the surface than she ever would’ve guessed with her celebrity crush. “And you played the part of Elizabeth Oliver’s fake fiancé that evening, standing up to her horrific father.”

“I did.”

“That was very brave of you.” And had ultimately led him to this situation.

His blue eyes reflected his gratitude, but she could tell he didn’t like being on the receiving end of too much praise and seriousness. Leaning closer, he gently touched her cheek. “I’m incredible at the fake fiancé ploy,” he said. “You and I could try it, my beauty. For my protection this time?”

She laughed. Unsteadily, but still a win for her. She would give up her molar teeth to be engaged to Jarom Love. And she had to pretend she didn’t long for a commitment with him. Keep it light just as they’d agreed.

“Good one, handsome. But I already told you I’m going to be flirting with you and Easton Coleville. There will be no cameras around so no need for the fake fiancé tactic.”

“Disappointing, angel. Very disappointing. The offer is always on the table.” His gaze trailed over her face and he seductively trailed his fingertips along her cheek and just under her bottom lip. “Always,” he added huskily.

Longing swirled in the air between them. Autumn was entranced by him, surprised by the manly huskiness, and completely in his power. She leaned toward him as his hand smoothly cupped her jawline and tilted her head up. Their lips were centimeters apart and she’d never wanted any kiss like she craved Jarom’s.

“Buckle up for landing, please,” Paul’s voice said over the intercom.

Autumn jumped and her nose knocked into Jarom’s. She pulled back, cupping her stinging nose and hoping it wasn’t bleeding. She didn’t feel any moisture, just a bit of pain.

“Paul.” She said her friend’s name like a curse word.

He had cameras up there in the cockpit. Did he see they were close to a kiss and he wanted to interrupt? That didn’t fit her thoughtful buddy. Paul liked to tease her, but he was in love with the swimmer Shay Cannon. They were adorable together and both wanted Autumn to find ‘happily ever after and her faith in Jesus’. She had to remind them often that neither would happen. Miracles. Faith. Love. Trust in heaven or another human. Not for her but nice for other people, she supposed.

“You all right?” Jarom asked, tilting her chin to look at her nose.

“Fine. You?”

“Just disappointed.” His nose looked a little red. “That was almost a perfect moment. We’ll get back there soon.”

His words were a promise. Her heart raced and she had to look away, out at the dark sky and a few pinpricks of light in the small city after midnight.

Paul’s interruption stunk, but it was for the best. She flirted and teased and sometimes allowed a handsome and appealing man to kiss her, but if she kissed Jarom … She shook her head. He was too entrancing, and there was a connection between them she had to break. No kissing him, even if they both knew they were ‘players’ and had no hope of a relationship or a future together. That might fly for him, but she couldn’t stay strong if she kissed him. He’d know he was her heart’s desire and she’d become even more invested.

Clenching her hands into fists, she knew she’d have to redouble her efforts to flirt with Easton and somehow keep her heart detached from Jarom.

She glanced askance at him. He was studying her with a mixture of concern and smolder that made her stomach hop. He was too good. She was an accomplished flirt, but Jarom took it to epic levels. He’d never commit his heart to her, though, and she only had a heart of iron.

Stay strong , she begged herself. If only God loved her like He did so many of her friends.

She’d been strong on her own for so many years. Sometimes it would be nice to let down her guard and rely on a higher being or a strong man.

No. She had this. Autumn Cardon was a one-woman army. Though she didn’t mind Aiden’s backing and Paul’s friendship, she needed nobody but her own strength.

She definitely didn’t need a pretty-boy, billionaire bachelor.

Even if she longed for him.