24. Powerful

24

Powerful

Emma

We’ve been back in New York for a few days now, but I’ve been avoiding Auston as much as possible. I still don’t know where I stand in the romance heroine department, and the less I see of him while I figure it out, the better. Because whenever I’m with him, I’m ready to surrender and let the author dictate my every move toward my happily ever after. Which is dangerous. Very dangerous .

If only Hayley and Alice were here. I may have shrugged it off and pretended our relationship was still fake when they asked about it, but I’m not s o sure anymore. I wish they could help me sort this out.

I just need to stay away from Auston for a few more days, that’s all.

And I need coffee. I risk a glance through the window and see that everyone is talking and moving stuff around, which means they’re not shooting.

Tiptoeing downstairs, I glance around. Once I’m sure Auston isn’t here, I hustle across the street to Rise & Grind.

Of course. Why didn’t I think of them before? Maybe Mari and Beth can help me.

I push open the door of the coffee shop—which is thankfully empty—and they’re both chatting behind the counter.

“Hey!” Mari says with a large smile. “Already? Weren’t you just in here two hours ago?”

I roll my eyes. “You sound just like Auston. Shouldn’t you be thrilled that I’m back? I’m a loyal customer. We don’t shame you when you march in and buy stacks of books by the dozen.”

They both laugh. “She’s not wrong,” Beth says.

Mari raises her hands in surrender. “Hey, I’m just looking out for you.”

When Beth turns around to make me my coffee, I lean on the counter. “Speaking of Auston, there’s something I wanted to ask the two of you.”

“Sure,” Mari says, a crease forming on her forehead. “Everything okay?”

“Um, it’s kind of complicated, but I really need some guidance. Just promise me you won’t say a thing about this to anyone.”

“Of course.” Mari nods, very serious.

“Absolutely,” Beth chimes in, placing a steaming cup of coffee in front of me.

“Well, first of all, you need to know that—”

“Auston!” Mari exclaims, peering over my shoulder. “Coffee?”

“Hey, Marissa. Beth.” His deep voice sends a shiver through my body. “No, thanks.”

I wheel around, and his gaze falls on me. Instantly, I’m hit with the warm and fuzzies. Really? “I knew I’d find you here.”

Maybe he’s right. This coffee addiction really is getting out of hand.

“Um, can we talk?” he asks, cocking his head to the side.

I shoot the girls a purposeful glance, grab my coffee, and follow him outside.

“Have you been avoiding me?” he asks, leaning one shoulder against the brick wall.

I scrunch my face, shaking my head. “What? No. Of course not. I just had a lot to do after being away for a week, you know? Cleaning and stuff.” As if. Why would the place need cleaning if no one was there?

He arches an eyebrow. “Cleaning?”

“Uh-huh. So, what’s up?”

His shoulders sag a little. “Well, I have the premiere for my latest movie tomorrow, and I wanted to ask if you’d come with me.”

“Um.” I bite my lip.

“Unless you’re still avoiding me.” He crosses his arms over his chest, making his biceps bulge. Dang it. That shirt perfectly highlights all of his muscles. I hate it. Especially now that I know what they look like underneath.

“Of course I’m not. Sure, I’ll come with you,” I say, then drop my voice to a whisper. “I am your fake girlfriend, after all.”

He stares at me for a second, then nods. “Exactly.”

I force a smile. “Perfect.”

“Robyn says you already have a dress, so I’ll pick you up at five. Oh, and I’ll drive.” He winks.

My throat goes dry. “Great. See you then.”

Crap. Why does this keep happening to me? And why am I still watching him as he walks away?

Without thinking twice, I scurry back into the coffee shop and lock the door behind me. “I need your help. This can’t wait.”

Mari rushes out from the backroom. “Are you okay?”

“No.” I hesitate, wondering how to phrase this. Maybe I just need to say it out loud. Then, I’ll hear how ridiculous it sounds, and the feeling will go away. “I think I’m falling in love with Auston.” There, I said it. Darn it. The butterflies are still there.

“Oh! That’s great,” Beth says, shaking her blonde hair.

“Yeah, why is that a problem?” Mari asks. “Isn’t that the point of dating?”

“Ugh.” I lean my elbows on the counter. “Maybe we should sit down. I’ll tell you everything.”

“Wow.” Beth breathes out once I finish recounting my long and complicated history with Auston.

Mari frowns, nodding, like she’s been doing for the last few minutes. “Okay. Okay.”

“I know.” I grimace.

“So, fake dating is actually a thing?” Mari asks, a curious sparkle in her eye.

I take her hand. “Girl, focus. What do I do? I can’t be in love with him. He’ll ruin me again.” Just when I finally figured out how to protect myself from being hurt. Letting someone in is a breach of protocol. One that could lead to pain and misery. Abandonment.

“Calm down,” she says in a soothing voice, squeezing my hand. “We’ll figure this out.”

“Besides, how can you be so sure he’ll break your heart?” Beth says. “From what you told us, he’s been great, taking care of you when you were sick, and so on.”

I glance at her. “Have you seen Auston Buckley? The man’s a walking red flag.”

“She’s got a point,” Mari says, wincing. “Not to mention, all that history is hard to navigate. And you two live very different lives.”

“Exactly. We live on opposite coasts. I already know it’s a bad idea and that it wouldn’t work out. On top of that, he probably doesn’t even have that in mind. He’s just being friendly and—okay—a little flirty, but that doesn’t mean he’s feeling what I am. I don’t need help getting him to reciprocate my feelings. I need help getting over him. Help me, please.”

“Oof,” Beth says. “That’s tricky. And I’m not sure I’m the right person to give out relationship advice. I’ve been so on and off with Lucas so many times, I don’t even know where we’re at.”

I grimace. Exactly the reason why I don’t do relationships. I don’t need this kind of drama in my life. Except, it’s too late. I cast a desperate glance at Mari, who looks lost in thought. Hopefully, she’s cooking me up a speech that will make me fall out of love with Auston.

“Well,” she says, “I’ve got nothing either. Love is a pretty powerful feeling. More powerful than reason.”

I let out a sigh. “Seriously, you guys! That’s all you have for me? I need to go with him to a big premiere tomorrow evening. What am I going to do?”

“Relax,” Beth says. “Just keep calm and pretend you’re the lead actress in a movie. Like, it’s not really you. You’re just acting a part.”

Mari rubs her chin. “Or you can think about all his faults.”

I let out a huff. “What faults? The man is perfect!”

“Right,” Mari says, shaking her head. “That was dumb. Plus, I just tried, and it doesn’t work.”

“Wait. What?” I frown.

“Um, nothing. Do what Beth said. Hers was good advice. That’s why she’s one of my best friends.”

I glance between the two of them in disbelief. That’s hardly any advice. I don’t know how these girls even go through life at this point. But I guess their ideas will have to do. Hayley and Max are in a remote village, and Deacon and Alice are hiding away in some random mountains in the heart of France, so I’m on my own here. Maybe Beth’s advice isn’t that bad. I’m good at pretending. And I just have to remember that this is what Auston is already doing. We’re both playing a part, and my heart will just have to get on board with that.