Chapter Fifteen

The water was crystalline, the current enigmatic in its need to pull me along. It was leading me somewhere and was clearly excited about whatever destination it had in mind. It moved me faster than I could've managed on my own, which was pretty damn fast if I did say so myself. A school of brightly colored fish broke apart in a discordant rush as I swam past, reforming their rows and columns once the waters had settled. A familiar dolphin swam up beside me, amusement clear in her countenance. She, too, knew where the water was leading me. Impatient, I packed on a burst of speed, arcing over a reef and through a me-sized opening in a rock formation.

There, around a thick bunch of sea kelp, I was greeted by a warm smile, dark hair, and azure eyes that crinkled at the corners, warm arms reaching out to embrace me…

The haze of my dream faded into the lilac dawn. A thin sheet covered me just above my hips, and the sea breeze blowing over my exposed skin made me shiver and shrink further into the human heater at my back. Kai's arm was slung across my stomach, the other playing with strands of my hair, running them across my nipple. My skin pebbled, heat pooling low despite the many times we'd made love throughout the night. We'd only stopped about an hour ago, collapsing in a gelatinous, sated puddle of limbs and shared breaths as the last of the stars winked out of the sky.

I was surprised to hear the sounds of soft purring somewhere near my feet. Kai must have let him in, but Otto didn't even like sharing the bed with me most nights, never mind a stranger.

I pushed my arms out, the stretch tingling its way down to the tips of my toes, then turned over my shoulder with a lazy grin. "Good morning."

His lips brushed my forehead. "Did you know you make little mewling sounds in your sleep?"

"I do?"

"It was adorable, like a baby dolphin."

"I was dreaming about dolphins. And you," I added as an afterthought.

"Oh?" He sounded amused. "And what was I doing in this dream of yours?"

Another sharp gust of wind, and I snuggled in close to him, "We were swimming together. And you were kissing me."

"Good. That means I was doing something right."

As he pulled me flush against his body, my thigh brushed against his hard length, and I hummed my appreciation. "You've been doing a lot of things right tonight." I agreed.

"Maren," he said slowly, pulling me from my lustful train of thought. "Have you often had dreams like this?"

I shrugged. "Off and on my whole life. Comes with the territory of being an ocean geek." They had picked up frequency since the aquarium, but it didn't take a genius to figure out why. "And now that I've slept with a merman, I suspect they'll be much more risqué."

"And how about-" he began, but something on his wrist caught my attention. Or rather, the lack of something.

"Your watch. It's gone." I said, pointing to his hand.

He raised it to his face, just noticing the band was missing himself. He frowned. "It must have come off in the fight."

He looked so crestfallen that it was almost adorable, "I'll ask Johnny if he found it," I assured him. Assuming he ever wanted to talk to us ever again after the trouble we'd given him. The bar was his whole life, and we'd done a fair amount of damage…

"I'm sorry I caused you trouble." he said sincerely.

I shook my head. "Dennis started it. You were just trying to protect me. I only overreacted because…"

"Because you were frightened."

I nodded. I still was. What happened between us didn't change anything…other than absolutely everything. I'd thought myself perfectly capable of ignoring my very real, very visceral attraction to Kai, and failed epically. Granted, it was one of the best failures of my life, but as the euphoria of the night faded, I had the unmistakable urge to leave our lover's nest and dive into the ocean. The subconscious desire that had influenced last night's dream grew stronger as the salt air caressed my back. But then Kai reached down to caress the dimple at the base of my spine, and all my thoughts short-circuited.

I fit into him perfectly, like two halves coming together. Our shuffling greatly offended Otto, who jumped off the bed and sauntered out with a disgruntled meow. I knew he'd be back as soon as he wanted breakfast. Kai turned us, hoisting me on top of him, the slates of the rising sun streaming over his chest like nature herself was blessing our union. I moved over him, tracing my lips against the scuff of his chin, and ran my hands through the dark, silky strands of his hair, envious that it was untangled while mine resembled a crow's nest.

He groaned, and I never heard a sexier sound in my life. His own hands were busy as well, focused on kneading my breasts, cupping my ass so I rubbed more closely against him.

"Tell me again," I whispered. "What you told me last night." I bit gently on his collar bone, nibbling over the spot until it turned maroon, "Tell me you're mine." It was possessive, even a touch animalistic, but I needed to hear it.

He cupped my cheek, rubbing it with his thumb. "I am yours, little star. I think I always have been."

I lifted myself onto him, unable to stand the pressure growing within me, the tightness in my chest. I sighed as I rocked against him, a ship drifting towards a safe harbor. And there he was, right behind me, waiting to welcome me in.

For however long we had left.

We didn't leave my room until the sun rose, and only because I was in desperate need of a drink. And a swim,came the urgent afterthought. Fresh water first. I slipped out of Kai's arms, my body buzzing. Ironic that he was the one with electricity running through his veins, but I felt supercharged. Some of it must have rubbed off, because when I reached for the door handle, there was a brief flash accompanied by a sharp sting to my palm. Note to self, get wood floors.

I walked down to the kitchen to find yet another surprise waiting for me. "Dad? What are you doing up?"

He held a steaming cup of coffee in his hands. Hands that weren't trembling. He gave me a small smile as he inclined his head out the window. "The sun is up, so should be all of nature"s non-nocturnal creatures."

He was always full of odd sayings like that, ones I never thought I'd hear again. In fact, the moment was such a rarity that I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn't still dreaming. I started rummaging through the cabinets for any kind of breakfast, my search fruitless. "Where's Becca?"

"She ran out on a few errands."

"And she left you alone?" And you made coffee?

"I am a grown man, starfish." he said, amused. "We saw you came home last night and wanted to make sure we had enough food for our new guest." he said, motioning to the empty cabinet I'd just closed.

"Guest?" I asked, praying he meant Cee just as Kai walked into the kitchen, wearing silk boxers… and nothing else. He'd found one of my hair ties, hot pink, which held his unruly hair against the base of his neck. Fading pink lines and a few deliberately placed hickeys littered his abs and upper chest. All in all, he looked thoroughly sexed up… and I was thoroughly mortified.

Dad narrowed his eyes curiously. "Hello again, son."

I would give anything for a hole to open to the center of the earth and swallow me right now.

Kai had the common sense to look bashful, but he unflinchingly met Dad's stare. "Good morning, sir."

"I assume you have clothes around here somewhere?" He took a casual sip of his coffee while my face brightened to the color of a stop sign.

"Yes sir. I'll just go get them." Kai rubbed his neck, one of the more human gestures he'd picked up, and made as graceful an exit as possible. I stood there, my feet glued to the tile.

Once he'd retreated up the stairs, dad turned to me, "Well, that wasn't the guest I was expecting." I gulped, but his stern expression melted into an amused grin. Then he started laughing.

"Dad!" I complained. "That's so not funny!"

"On the contrary, I haven't had this much fun in years. Are there going to be any other handsome young men making an appearance in our kitchen this morning?"

"Ugh!" I buried my face in my hands. "This is so embarrassing."

"Tell me about him," he invited, gesturing to an empty chair. "I believe he's come around here before."

I was surprised he remembered, but it seemed that whatever magic Kai worked on him was making more of an improvement than any trial drug he'd tried in the past. Thankfully, he didn't seem to recall knocking me over, and I was glad. I didn't want him carrying the guilt of something he couldn't control. I absently rubbed my chin as I sat beside him.

"He's Cee's cousin." I began, sticking with the same story we'd given the others, "She'd invited him to help her with her photoshoot."

"Yes, I saw the pictures."

My eyes widened. "You did?"

"Cee emailed them to Becca. You weren't going to tell us?"

"I was just helping her with a project. It wasn't anything special."

"It was," he insisted. "You helped her pursue her dream. And I assume this is how you met Kai? I recall him saying something about you saving his life."

"He tried surfing when he first got here." I lied, thinking on my feet. "Got caught in a sleeper wave, and I pulled him to shore."

Dad grinned knowingly. "Well then it's no wonder the boy is so taken with you. He didn't take his eyes off you in those photos." He looked out over the water, taking a slow sip of his coffee. "You look just like your mother."

I stiffened, preparing for the darkness to swallow him. But his eyes remained clear, albeit a bit wistful. I said carefully, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, about the photoshoot, I mean. It's been a crazy few weeks," That was the understatement of the century.

He waved a dismissive hand, "You're a busy adult in the working world. And you've clearly had your hands full." he said with a wink towards the door Kai disappeared through, "Will we be seeing him around?"

His question was innocent enough, but it soured my mood all the same. I tried to stop it, but my voice trembled as I whispered, "I don't know."

I was so tired of everyone in my life leaving me, even if it was through no fault of their own. It was ironic that someone who'd spent her whole life studying the ocean was afraid of change when it came to my own life.

Dad put an arm around my shoulder, and I leaned my head against him like when I was a little girl, and he comforted me after I'd scraped my knee, pouting and miserable after the peroxide and bandage. There was no gauze to cover up this wound.

"He's a fool if he thinks he can walk away from someone like you. Just say the word and I'll drag him under my boat."

I snorted. If it wasn't at the bottom of the ocean, Kai could've probably tugged it with one hand and used the other to cover a yawn. "Thanks, Dad."

"Have you seen your mother?" He stopped rubbing my shoulder, his hand falling to his side. His eyes focused out the window again, towards the water like he always did when he drifted off. "I could've sworn she was…"

Hesitantly, I stood to move in front of him, blocking the view, and waved a hand in front of him, "Dad?"

He shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose, "Sorry, Starfish. Lost my train of thought there."

"It's okay." Whatever mojo Kai had done, it looked like it only worked to a point. Still, it was the most lucid I'd seen him in years.

"My research, that's what I meant to say. Have you seen my research?"

"You've got to be more specific, there's a shit ton in your office." I pointed out.

"Language." he frowned. "It was something I set aside years ago, inside of a metal lunchbox with a lock." He held his hands apart, estimating the size for me.

I thought back to the day I'd organized the office after the midnight rampage he'd gone on. There hadn't been any box, just mountains of loose paper and folders. "Doesn't ring a bell. Did you check where Becca and I put everything?"

He nodded absently, "I'll have another look. There was a name on it too… I'm sure I'll remember it at some point. It held some very important research. I need to make sure everything's in order."

"I'm sure it'll turn up." I assured him.

Kai walked back into the room, "Ah, he owns clothes after all!" Dad cheered. Kai had even donned the sandals he'd kicked off in the hallway.

"Dad," I groaned, but I was glad for his teasing, if it meant he was here with us.

"You're too old for me to forbid you from bringing boys home, my only option is to embarrass them into never coming back."

"Kai's not easily embarrassed." He would need insecurities for that, and he hadn't been around humans, or the internet, long enough to develop any. But even as I said the words, I was surprised to see a flush of color bloom on his cheeks.

"My apologies, sir. That was a less than proper introduction."

Dad waved a hand, and I knew all was forgiven. "Come and sit, I'm sure I can scrounge up a few eggs."

"Do you want me to do that?" I checked.

He shook his head. "I've been cleared for small tasks. Besides, Becca thinks it will help keep my mind on the present."

I nearly swayed in my seat. He knew what had been happening to him these last few years? I put a hand over my chest as an arrow of guilt pierced clean through it. I cleared my throat, my mouth suddenly dry. "I'll just get changed, then."

Back in my room, I sat gingerly on the rumpled bed sheets. Otto had curled up on Kai's side of the bed, purring happily in the tangle of covers. I shouldn't be thinking of him having a side of the bed when there was no guarantee he'd be coming back to it. He'd only been in my life a few weeks and he'd thrown everything into chaos. Glorious, sexy chaos, but too wild to temper the demands of the real world. I was distracted by my curiosity, which I was foolish to believe was purely scientific, then learning about him, his world, and showing him mine. That it wasn't just full of people hell-bent on torture in the name of progress. And he adapted extremely fast, every new thing in this world an enticement rather than a hindrance. But none of those novelties, not even me, could keep him from his true home.

It was time for him to leave, I knew it. I could feel the tides changing, an instinctual response that settled in the pit of my stomach, the pain manifesting into a stomachache that made me wrap my arms around my midsection.

It's fine, he said he was yours, he'll come back. But when? And what if I wasn't here when he did?My breathing became erratic, my throat tightening as panic flooded my veins. My eyes flew in every direction, trying to settle on something, anything that could pull me out of the spiral. They landed on my balcony, settling on the synodic tides. I forced myself over there, letting the wind cool the sweat beading on my neck. I began timing my breath to the pulses of water, like I was preparing for a dive, until the panic receded back to manageable levels. I couldn't erase it entirely, not when there was still so much left to do.

My phone vibrated on my nightstand, and I rose on shaky legs, the panic zapping my energy. I could've crawled back in bed and snuggled up with Otto for the rest of the day if it wasn't for the text Cee sent me.

‘Looks like he forgot to lock me out after all. Help me get my shit out before the staff calls the cops?'

Just the distraction I needed. It was a little after nine, and knowing how much she had in her room, the fabrics alone…

‘Your partner in crime is on her way.'

The dress from the aquarium was ruined, but it was still one of my favorites, so I gently folded it and left it on top of my dresser. I would ask Cee if she could fix it once she got settled. It was her design after all. I dressed in loose shorts and a tank top, threw as many of my curls into a ponytail that would fit, and went back downstairs for my flip flops.

"...I know." I heard Dad say from the kitchen. I paused, but their conversation was too low to hear from where I was. But like last night, I couldn't help but inch closer. "She's never been good at hiding her emotions. But I'm sure you understand the consequences of…"

My ears strained, but to no avail, I missed the end of his sentence, and the beginning of Kai's response.

"...will not be an issue."

"Good, otherwise I'd be arrested for murder."

"... in line behind Cee." Kai chuckled, and Dad joined him. It had been too long since I'd heard him laugh like that. I crept closer, picking up more of their conversation.

"She's a spitfire. I think Maren would've ended up a recluse if not for her."

"Your daughter is the bravest person I know. I wouldn't have survived this long without her."

I felt a fluttering in my chest at the reverent tone of his voice, and quickly smothered it, gripping onto my steely resolve with sweaty palms. Straightening, I walked into the kitchen. "We've been summoned." I showed Kai the message.

Dad scowled, reading it over his shoulder. "I've never liked that man. For all the money at his disposal to be happy and do some good in this world, he is a miserable, self-indulgent sod. Cee can stay as long as she wants."

"You know, if you hit another stride in your research he may invite you to his next ‘charity gala'." I said, using my fingers to air quote. They got more flamboyant and strayed further from the point of the charity with each event. Now it was just a cause the attendees could say they donated to as a write off on their taxes. "They brought back marine conservation this year."

He snorted, echoing my thoughts. "I wouldn't go even if those aristocrats paid to further my research out of the fraction of altruism in their black hearts. Even the scientists they invite are insane, and I should know what that looks like."

"You're not insane, Dad." I said, thinking of Reinhardt, and the casually cruel way he'd tortured Kai. The memory of him bleeding and screaming on that table would haunt me for years.

"Not recently. And hopefully not anytime soon." Dad stood, coming over to hug me. "Give Cee my best. I'm going to head up to the office and see if I can't track down that box." Then he turned to Kai and clapped him on the shoulder. "You take care of her."

Kai nodded solemnly, "I will."

Dad gripped his arm then, his eyes sinking into the past. "Above all, keep Ironheart away from her. He can't get to either of them."

"Dad." I said, sharper than I intended. He jerked back, releasing Kai's arm and shook his head to clear the fog.

"Sorry. I should probably take my sanity pills."

I glanced at Kai, "Would you be able to help him again?"

His wince was contained to a barely perceivable grimace. "I'm afraid I've done all I can."

I was about to ask him to elaborate, but Dad started for the kitchen door. "Are you sure you don't want us to stay until Becca gets back?" I pressed.

"She called while you were upstairs. She's on her way now. I'll be fine, you get Cee out of that prison."

I listened carefully as he climbed the stairs, scarcely breathing until I heard the study door close.

"Hey," Kai said softly, brushing his fingers against my arm, and I jumped. "He's okay."

"I know, I just…I'm trying not to get my hopes up."

He frowned, his eyes straying towards the kitchen window…out to the sea. "Maren, I have to talk to you about something-"

I squeezed my eyes shut and held my hands out, shaking my head. "Later please. Let's get going."

Kai wove his hand through mine, a perfect threading of our fingers, then tugged me close, leaning in to kiss the top of my head. I shied away, dropping it to rub my shoulder. He didn't say anything, but there was a soft crease in between his brows that persisted as we trekked across the toffee sand.

Cee's sardonic smile faded as she took us in. My bruises and scrapes were gone thanks to Kai's magic, but the emotional rollercoaster of the night was visible in the dark circles under my eyes, and the defeated slump in my shoulders.

"You look like crap. Rough night?"

I raised a brow. "Other than being molested by my ex-boyfriend?"

She winced, "Shit. Forget I said anything. Come in before I put my foot further into my mouth." She opened the back door for us, and we followed her through the kitchen and up the stairs. "We've got a few hours before the staff stops being nice to me."

"I thought they liked you?"

"They do," Cee replied. "But they like being employed more. Can"t say I blame them."

She was uncharacteristically happy for someone who'd just been disowned. I knew it was the calm before the storm. The unbothered act would only go on as long as she had something to focus on. Once it snapped, her rampage would be one for the ages.

The hallway looked like a Cee-sized tornado had swept through it. Boxes of clothes, swaths of fabric, pillows-even her mattress- had been dragged into the hallway. There were suitcases full to bursting with designs and scrap fabric, a mannequin head with a wig pinned to its head and three sunglasses overlapping the slim nose. Kai saved me from falling flat on my face when my foot got caught on the edge of a lamp post that was missing the shade.

If the hallway was a tornado wreck, the room itself was a detonated bomb with Cee at its center, muttering to herself as she tallied the things she'd already packed.

"Where's Allie?" I asked.

"She went to get Sean's truck and hook the trailer on." Cee shook her head, a rueful smile pulling her lips. "I swear that girl must love me."

"You know she does. Is all this coming to my house?" I asked nervously, gazing at the mannequin heads in particular.

"Some of it. I figured I'd split the wardrobe and could leave the workshop in Allie's guest room." She glanced at me quickly. "That is if Becca doesn't mind."

"She gave the all clear." I bit my lip, "So did dad."

"No shit?" Cee gasped. "I know he came to the ceremony, but…"

"Seems he's finally coming through."

"That's… wow, that's incredible." She tossed an arm around my shoulder. "I'm really happy to hear that."

"Yeah, me too." I said, glancing under my lashes at Kai. I could feel him watching me, but with a bomb of my own counting down, I didn't want to face him. I turned away. Cee frowned, looking between us. Kai shrugged, just as clueless to my inner breakdown.

"Okay, I was thinking we could start here…"

We spent the next half-hour in restrained silence, Cee tossing things in the general vicinity of the bag she wanted them packed into, me organizing everything so it would actually fit, and Kai bringing the bags to the foyer. I watched him work, unable to keep from acknowledging his presence, so warm and familiar, but I whipped back to my task each time before he caught me staring. On his next trip down the stairs, two suitcases in one hand- the showoff- Cee came out of her room, placing her hands on her hips as she surveyed the remaining damage.

"I think we're almost there." she sighed, reaching up to fix her disheveled ponytail.

"I'm taking the boat out today." I blurted.

She dropped her hands, hairdo forgotten, and her honey blonde locks tumbled around her wide eyes. Her questions came rapid fire. "What are you talking about? Whose boat? Where do you want to go?"

"Not me, Kai."

"What about me?" he said, coming back up the stairs.

"Maren says you want to take a boat out?"

"I do?"

"Apparently."

Tugging at the ends of my hair, I groaned. "Cee, do you want to come with us or not?"

She threw up her hands, "I don't even know where you're going! Are you feeling okay? You're shaking."

I snapped. "Dammit Cee, can you just give me an answer?!"

She paused, hurt coloring her eyes for a moment before steely resolve took over, and she grabbed my hand. "Excuse us for a moment," she said, tugging me down the stairs. Her grip was near bruising, but I didn't fight her. We made it to the garage door, just off the kitchen, before she whirled on me. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

I winced, covering my ears. "You know this room echo's, right?"

"I don't care if my parents hear me from London! I know last night shook you up, but you're not acting like yourself." Her face softened and she took both of my hands in hers. "What happened, M? You're starting to scare me."

I shook my head, the shiver cascading down my body. "I- I can't…" I could feel the anxiety creeping back in, chilling me down to the marrow. She saw the signs too, because in one breath she'd pushed my ass to the ground, sticking my head between my knees.

"Deep breath. Good, and again." Cee was on her own planet most days, but she'd also helped me through many a panic attack, the worst being the night of Dad"s accident. At this point she was a gold medalist in the ‘Calming Maren the Fuck Down' Olympics", which was good, because I felt two steps away from the cliff and poised to jump.

"H-he's leaving," I stuttered when I felt like my lungs started responding to the air I was inhaling.

"Who? Kai?" I nodded. "Well, you're the one insisting he get on the boat…"

"No, last night. He told me the sea is calling him back, and I… I told him to leave."

"I'm guessing he said no. And judging by your blush and the self-satisfied glow surrounding him like a fucking halo, you two finally had sex."

"Somehow I thought you'd be celebrating that news with champagne." I replied glumly.

"Not when you're clearly upset. Was it bad? Your right, stupid question. So, what then?"

"He's leaving Cee." I repeated, not caring that I sounded like a whiny child, "And he should. He has a life down there. Friends, family. I can't keep him from that. And I have a life I need to start living. The two of us, I knew from the start it was never going to work. I knew it, I fucking told myself over and over, but…"

She slid down the wall next to me, her eyes fixing on the gilded wall sconces across from us, shedding a buttery glow on the teal walls and checkered floors. "But you love him."

I jerked my head towards her, eyes wide and tear bitten.

"Don't deny it, I've never seen you this happy. Plus, it's not like it's hard to love him. He's only been my cousin for a few weeks, and I love the guy, platonically of course. He's perfect for you, he even has that awkward side that only a nerd like you would consider a turn on. I've been trying to tell you from the beginning, you've got it bad."

"And that's exactly why I wanted to keep my distance! He's a merman Cee, there was no way we can work." The last word came out hoarse. My throat felt as dry as sandpaper, but I didn't feel like I was going to cry again, I just really needed a drink.

"Has he said any of this to you, or is this ‘Anxiety Maren' talking?"

I coughed, clearing my throat. "He told me he was feeling the pull of the ocean, and then this morning he said he wanted to talk." No doubt a long-drawn and painful goodbye.

"But not that he didn't want to be with you?" she sighed. "I'm not trying to be the powdered sugar in the recipe of shit you're baking, but I'm going to give you some advice that future Maren will appreciate."

"And that is."

"Grow a pair of tits and talk to him."

"That isn't going to help my anxiety."

"Neither is living under the assumption that everyone in your life is going to leave you."

"Damn, Cee."

"I'm just being honest."

"And I love you for that, I think." I picked at the edge of my tank top, searching for non-existent fraying edges.

She sighed, then placed a hand on my shoulder and gave me an affectionate squeeze. "Tell him how you feel before you never get the chance to." Cee said. She stood, walking across the hall to the garage door. "You've got an hour before Allie and Sean get here."

I nodded, but still didn't move for a good five minutes after she left. How could I bare my heart to Kai and then watch him leave?

Sorry Cee, I'm not nearly as brave as you think I am.

I staggered to my feet, wandering back down the labyrinthine hallways, stopping in the kitchen for a much-needed glass of water, and I eventually ended up in the ballroom. Like ghosts of memory, I could see the first time I set foot in here, a scared little girl in a shimmering dress clinging to her dad's pant leg, my fear dissipating as I spotted another tiny figure, with glittery fairy wings, and followed her into the kitchen. I saw the night of the last gala, sulking after my first day as a janitor and Cee chatting up any rich billionaire she could find to launch her line. So much had changed since Kai came into our lives. I saw him now, sliding around in fuzzy socks and dancing in the middle of the ballroom like we were the only two people in the world.

Like my memories called him to me, Kai appeared in the entrance to the foyer. The deafening silence spanned between us, and as much as I wanted to know what he was thinking as his gaze roamed across me, I was too scared to ask, never mind try to bridge the mental connection I'd kept firmly shut since this morning.

He walked into the ballroom, closing the distance. "Maren."

"What are you doing?" I said, backing away.

"Looking for you. We have to talk."

"I'm not up for talking." My throat was dry again, the sandpaper feeling turning into a low burn that even draining the rest of the water in my glass didn't soothe. The stress making me physically sick would just be the cheery on top of that shit-filled sundae. I started to turn, but my back was to the wall, and then Kai was there. His arms loosely braced on either side, giving me room, but not enough to maneuver around him.

"You're avoiding me." he said brusquely.

"I'm not…" I hedged, fiddling with my empty glass.

"You're trying to get me to leave." His eyes were filled with hurt and accusation.

"I'm not trying to do anything. You said the ocean wants you back, so I'm helping you. Like I've been helping you."

"You're still a bad liar, little star. You weren't saying this last night."

"Last night was a mistake."

His face darkened, and his magic pulsed into the room, like a seismic wave upon the earth. "And this morning, was that also mistake?"

My breathing was erratic, each inhalation felt like daggers slicing into me, through me. I forced my next words out through sheer will. "W- we shouldn"t have slept together. It confused everything. I don't have any claim to you, and you can't stay here much longer." Please, go before you take the rest of my heart with you.

"This is the same argument we've been having, little star. And I still don't believe you when you don't believe yourself."

"Kai," My voice was fuzzy as it hit my ears. My shaking hands lost their grip on the glass. As it shattered, my body crumpled, daggers of pain moving from my stomach, my head, my heart.

This wasn't a normal anxiety attack. My thoughts weren't racing. In fact, I couldn't think at all. Everything was fading into a distorted blob of pain and senselessness.

Kai released a colorful string of curses and scooped me into his arms before I landed on broken glass. He was screaming, or maybe I was. I wasn't sure, but the room was spinning, and I was following its rotations with detached interest as the edges of my vision darkened. When did I get on a carousel? I didn't know you could ride a horse sideways…

The horses raced off, and I was left floating in darkness, suspended in a jelly that I could push through, but I didn't go anywhere, not when my feet were tied together.

Cool air brushed my skin, my bare skin, and some small semblance of awareness came back. We were outside, Kai standing with his toes over the pool.

"...not ideal, but it will do." He might've looked at me. Were those tears in his eyes, or sunlight? "Stay with me, little star."

I hummed, my consciousness fading again as Kai talked to the stars. Wasn't it daytime? Why were the stars making an early debut? I hope they twinkled for him, I would.

I felt a rush of air, and a splash before water closed around my head. Then every nerve ending I owned fired to life, searing with electricity that burned them to a crisp, revitalized them, and started the process over again. I was definitely screaming now, a muffled stream of bubbles, and I couldn't stop myself from instinctually inhaling once I'd emptied my lungs. Salt water invaded my blood stream, turning every cell blue and briny. My thrashing increased, forcing me from Kai's arms. The only thing that registered was more pain. The skin split along my neck and beneath my ribs, giving the water somewhere to escape from. The jelly feeling returned, concentrating in my hands, the tops of my thighs, and the bottoms of my feet. The bones of my ankles had kicked together when we'd fallen in, and now refused to separate, bound with a familiar coat of slime. The more I tried to struggle, the tighter I was bound. Webbing spread up to the knuckles of my fingers, little filaments weaving together and solidifying, and when I lifted them, I could see an opalescent shimmer to my skin, spreading down my forearm.

Not skin. Scales.

I gasped, then held my breath, but water wasn't entering my lungs, at least, it wasn't getting stuck there. It flowed in and out, siphoning oxygen from the water without filling my lungs. Something heavy thumped against the floor of the pool, and my eyes shot to it, widening in horror. A large tail of deep indigos and blues spread out across the tiles. Black markings spread from the tips of the fluke and wove in delicate patterns up my waist. The same smattering of dark scales wove over my hips and over my breasts, around my gills.

My gills…

As the last dregs of agony finally gave out, all that remained of the husk of my body was pure shock that froze me in place. I sank to the floor of the pool. Kai hovered in the deep end, his hands balled into fists as he watched me suffer through the transformation. The same one I'd white-knuckled through with him dozens of times.

"W- what just happened?"I could tell the instant Kai heard me, and precisely how far I had to push for the message to reach him. My telepathic communication with him had changed as well. It was stronger in this form.

He was transfixed, his eyes haunted yet endlessly curious. It was a look I was familiar with, the scientist"s gaze, and a guilty conscience. I could feel it, feel the heat of his gaze all the way to the tip of the fluke.

"I told you we had to talk."