Chapter 23

Twenty-Three

"There you are, Fall Doll."

Her voice sent shivers down my back. I let go of Valentine's hands and I stood up because, whether I liked it or not, Mama Si had taken us in. She'd taken Grey in—and Valentine, too. She could have easily turned them away when they brought me here, but she didn't.

And I was going to remember that.

"Hello, Mama Si, Assa," I said with a nod, and Valentine stood up, too, coming to stand beside me.

"You look well rested. Was your breakfast to your liking?" she asked, her eyes moving fast from my face to Valentine's and back again. I had rarely seen Mama Si uncomfortable, but right now was definitely one of those times. Valentine made her uncomfortable, and with reason. The way this guy looked like a completely different person when we weren't alone, the way he promised you with those dark eyes that he could watch you burn in front of his feet and enjoy it, was indeed scary.

"It was, thank you," I said, then cleared my throat. "Valentine, do you mind?"

And the bastard knew exactly the effect he had on people, so the way he smiled could send you running the other way. I almost rolled my eyes.

"Of course. Please, excuse me," he said, and then lightning fast, he kissed my forehead.

He did this on purpose, too, just to piss me off.

I wanted to shout my guts out at him for getting me frustrated, but I couldn't, not in front of Mama Si—and he knew it.

But finally, he moved around her and Assa and disappeared through the door on the deck together with Shadow, who had barely moved from his shoulder.

"Thank you for taking us in, Mama Si," I said in a rush because I needed to get that out of the way first.

"Well, I couldn't just leave you out there to die," she said, waving her hand at the ocean, and she was already feeling more at ease.

"Thank you," I said again. "I won't forget it."

"Really? You're not going to tell me that I owe you?" she said, smiling sneakily, her eyes already glistening with excitement.

"You kind of do because you did steal my life from me, but still."

She laughed. "Oh, you're so funny, Fall Doll," she told me, moving to the ledge where Valentine and I were sitting just now. "Funny—and as good as dead."

Goose bumps rose on my forearms when I joined her, probably because I knew she was right. Assa stayed behind to give us a moment, as silent as always.

"I assume you heard."

"Oh, yes. Your Evernights told me plenty," said Mama Si, throwing me a look. "Is it really true that she's dead? Really ?"

"It is," I confirmed.

"Did you see the body with your own eyes?"

If she only knew… "There was no body. She turned to ashes."

Mama Si smiled. "Well then, this is a glorious day for the Seven Isles, doll."

Laughter burst out of me. "Believe me, Mama Si, it isn't. Worse monsters than Syra are still on the loose." The monsters that started it all.

"Yes, yes—but they're not nearly as powerful as she was," Mama Si said with a wave of her hand. "Even so, Fall Doll, I hope you understand that when they come for you, I will have no choice but to give you up."

My stomach twisted and turned. "I understand."

"And I will also tell them that I was forced by the Evernights to keep you hidden. It's the only way they'll let me live," she said.

"You can do whatever you want, Mama Si," I said through gritted teeth, mad at myself and at her, but mostly at the sirens. "I'll be leaving the Burrow as soon as I can, anyway. You might not have to lie at all on my account."

As soon as I spoke to Grey and Valentine, we'd come up with a plan. We'd figure out a way to hide from the sirens forever. The world was vast, the possibilities endless.

But…

Words Valentine said just now came back to me in a rush. Was that really the life I wanted to live for the rest of my days? Running and hiding from sirens who would probably stop at nothing to get to me?

Was that really the right thing to do?

"Don't rush, Fall Doll. There's no telling what's ahead of us now. They're not here yet, and maybe they'll take a day to find you," she said. "Congratulations on your baby, by the way."

It was like she'd fucking ripped my soul right out of me.

Nobody had said that to me yet. Nobody had congratulated me about my baby.

My hands closed over my stomach instinctively, even though I still couldn't tell a single difference.

"Thank you," I whispered, and I thought, no. No—I didn't want to live the rest of my days running and hiding from sirens, especially if I was going to have a baby soon. No way in any hell.

But then Mama Si said, "It shouldn't be long now. It's already been over two weeks."

Surprised, I turned to her. "What?"

"The end of the world, dear. The one the stars told us about."

If she'd have slapped me, it would have shocked me less.

Mama Si must have recognized the look on my face. "Don't tell me you forgot about it."

"I didn't forget," I whispered—and I hadn't. I hadn't forgotten at all. I'd been into the Nella Lexis myself—I'd seen the stars.

"I wonder how it will happen now, though," Mama Si continued. "I was so sure it would be Syra to bring it about." She turned to me. "I thought for sure it would be the same as it had been then, but now…now I think it's them. They will be the ones to do it."

"The sirens." My own voice sounded strange to my ears, and I kept shaking my head. "But…but what if it isn't true? What if the stars are wrong?"

This time, she was the one laughing bitterly. "Don't be silly, Fall Doll. The stars are never wrong."

I looked out at the ocean and the sky as the sun continued to set, but I didn't really see anything. In my mind, Syra's face was everywhere, blood dripping out of her mouth. In my mind, the stars spoke to me, whispered like the trees in the Woods used to do—mocked me.

You thought you were saved from Syra? You thought it was over?

You thought you were free?!

But I knew I wasn't. Since the moment Syra died and her body turned to ashes, I knew in my bones that something was wrong. I knew it wasn't over—far from it.

And once again, my gut feeling was proving to be perfectly true.

"Or maybe…it's you ?"

My head whipped to the side so fast my neck could have snapped if I were human still.

Again, Mama Si threw her head back and laughed. "I'm kidding, doll. I'm kidding! You should see your face." More laughter. "Oh, you could never. You're far too good to hurt a fly, let alone innocent people."

Don't be good.

My eyes closed and I forced myself to take in a deep breath, then step back.

"I'll leave the Burrow as soon as I can," I told her, no longer patient enough to continue this conversation—or maybe I was just a coward. Maybe I didn't want to face the reality of her words.

Because I wasn't.

My God, I wasn't too good to hurt a fly if that fly hurt the people I loved. Not anymore. And I couldn't even bring myself to feel bad about it.

"Don't rush, Fall Doll. Like I said—the sirens might not find you in a day. Maybe two—and maybe nine months!" She smiled. "The Burrow would love to have you. I've always wanted to be a grandmother, after all." And the way she looked at my stomach… "What are you going to do with it, though?"

Again, my arms wrapped around my waist instinctively, even though Mama Si didn't look like she was about to attack me—on the contrary. She was smiling like she might cry tears of joy any second now.

"With what ?" I said, and God help me I was going to launch myself at her if she said, the baby, but…

"The magic," Mama Si said. "They said Syra put her magic in you somehow—how much of it do you really have?"

Shit. "I don't know. I don't feel it. There's a good chance it didn't work at all." And that was my wishful thinking as well. Because I remembered how Syra had been relieved at the end of it before she turned to ashes. I remembered her words— it's complete now, human.

Whatever she'd meant to do, she'd done it, all right, regardless of what I felt.

"That would be a shame." Mama Si looked disappointed, but she recovered quickly. "Oh, well. At least you have the baby—that's even more important, Fall Doll." She put her hands to her chest. "Will you let him call me Nana ?"

What the fuck…

"That's what I called my grandmother. I loved her dearly."

Words kept evading me, but I finally found two. "You're crazy." Absolutely batshit crazy.

"I'll take it—if I can be his Nana. Will you, pretty please?" She stopped in front of me—and my God, she meant every word. She wasn't joking or messing with me—she meant it. "Will you let him call me that?"

I'll be damned … "Yes, Mama Si," I whispered, desperate to get the hell out of there now. "Yes, I will."

When she brought her hands over her smiling lips and her shoulders began to shake, I turned around and ran inside the building like my ass was on fire.

Never in my life had I felt so strange in my own skin, not even when I was there— right over there by that heart-shaped, pink pool I was looking at now, with the umbrellas made of glitter, and the comfy loungers, and the beautiful girls wearing sparkly bikinis and drinking colorful cocktails through swirly straws.

Never had I felt like I wasn't me before, and it was so odd I couldn't even put it in words.

I couldn't put my finger on what felt different exactly, but something did.

Then I felt his energy coming from somewhere close by, and before the minute was over, Grey stepped out on the balcony of the third floor that I'd never been to before but had always seen from the pool areas downstairs. It connected two different parts of the building like a tiny bridge, and it was barely ten feet long, but from here I could see almost all the pools in the Paradise yard—the big ones and the small ones, ones full of people and others empty. I could see the heart pool, too—my favorite, the one I used to swim in with the girls almost every day.

"Are you hiding from me, baby?" Grey said when he stopped behind me and put his arms around my body. I immediately lay back on his chest, releasing a deep breath. His proximity was its own brand of magic.

"Maybe," I muttered, closing my eyes for a moment and turning my head to the side so he could kiss my cheek.

"Nah, I think you wanted me to find you," he teased, and I smiled.

"I always want you to find me."

"And now I'm sick."

I jumped at the sound of Valentine's voice coming from where Grey had come through just now, but Grey had his arms around me still and he didn't let me move away.

Valentine was coming closer, looking both bored and irritated at the same time.

I'd been so consumed by Grey, by the peace he brought me when he was near that I hadn't heard a single thing—not the door opening again, and now his footsteps.

"Then close your ears," Grey said when Valentine stopped to my left, staring out at the yard, the big wall that surrounded the Paradise, the forest and the ocean beyond. The sky had already begun to turn orange, and in a few minutes night would fall. The many colorful lights of the Paradise would come on, transforming this place into an even more magical one.

"Maybe I like to cringe so hard I'll die of it," Valentine muttered, and Shadow jumped off his shoulder and landed on the balcony railing, watching curiously.

"You'll be doing everyone a favor," Grey said.

"You wouldn't last a day without me, brother," Valentine said.

"No—I wouldn't be running for my life with my wife and my baby without you," Grey said, and both Valentine and I flinched at the same time.

We locked eyes for a moment, and I thought he'd have something else to say to Grey. Instead, he just turned toward the ocean in silence.

"Behave, boys," I said. "We're all in this together no matter how we got here."

Even though I wanted to be angry enough at Valentine to set him on fire with my own hands, I couldn't. Something inside me didn't let me, that same part of me that insisted that this whole thing was for the better. That living in the dark in the Whispering Woods forever would have turned me bitter, even if I'd spent every waking hour with Grey. It would feel like my life was indeed stolen from me for the rest of my days.

It insisted that death was better.

"Unfortunately, I have to put up with your insufferable personality because I want to see Fall free by the end of this," Valentine said to Grey. "So, yes—I'll behave. Just until this is over."

Grey sighed, shaking his head and smiling as he stepped to my other side.

He said nothing though, and for a moment, the three of us looked out at the yard in silence as the sky lost more blue and became a fiery orange.

The dolls had noticed us there, and even though we were far away and it was getting darker by the minute, I recognized the three who moved away from the umbrellas to see us better—Melahni, Peanut, and Hannah.

Hannah with the colorful eyes who'd been Mama Si's offering the year before but wasn't chosen. Hannah who'd tried to warn me about this since day one, but I'd been too much of a fool to listen.

"I was like them once," I said, more to myself than them. I used to wear a sparkly bikini and lounge by the pool all day long, too. It was only months ago, not years, not decades the way it felt to me now.

"You were never like them," Valentine said, as if he knew it for a fact.

"If you were, you wouldn't be here right now," said Grey, but they were just being kind. I knew that, and I appreciated it, but I really was those girls. And back then, that had been the biggest blessing of my life—to be like them. To be… not me. Not the Fall who fell and stayed down, but the Fall who rose again. Chose better. Chose herself.

Valentine's words came back to me again— would you have rather lived like that ?—and this time I went further back, before the ritual.

Would I have rather Mama Si hadn't lied to me, hadn't manipulated me, and ultimately hadn't offered me in the ritual at all? Would I have rather she'd just treated me like one of her dolls and let me stay here, and I really wouldn't be here right now?

"They're waving at you," said Valentine, bringing me back to the present.

He was right—both Melahni and Peanut had raised their hands to wave at me, while Hannah just watched me coldly like always.

I smiled and waved at them, too. Maybe Amber had done Mama Si's deeds when she took me to the triangle room that night, but she had no idea what the hell she was doing. I was sure she'd had no ill will—she was just doing her job, that's all.

The girls weren't bad. Not at all—they'd been my friends once. I'd cared about them.

"What now?" I asked, both myself and the brothers. "What the hell happens now?" Because I didn't want to think. I didn't want to try to figure anything out. I just wanted to sit back and forget and let them take care of everything for a bit. I wanted to refuel myself because those days on the Eighth Isle, and the night before? They'd drained me completely—and I still hadn't even come to terms with what my life was looking like right now.

Or with the end of the goddamn world as Mama Si so kindly reminded me.

"Now I'm going to leave the Burrow and go search for some answers," Valentine said, and my heart jumped.

"No way." He was delusional if he thought I was going to let him out of my sight.

"Yes, way," Valentine said. "I need to talk to people."

"About what?"

"About you , Sunshine. About what was done to you."

I closed my eyes and forced myself to breathe in deeply, and when that didn't work, I turned my focus to the girls—more of them had come out from under the umbrellas and were watching me.

Just focus on the girls.

"There must be ways to hide it. Conceal it. Make you…undetectable," Valentine continued.

"The sirens will kill you," I reminded him, but he shook his head.

"The sirens aren't focused on me right now. I can easily mask myself and pretend to be someone else," Valentine said. "Which is why it's important that I leave right away before they become too desperate."

"And let me guess—you expect us to trust you," Grey finally said, never even turning to look at him.

"I saved your lives, so?—"

They both moved so fast I couldn't have possibly seen it coming. Before I knew it, Grey had Valentine by the neck against the wall, and his feet weren't touching the floor at all. Shadow was roaring over our heads as he flew in circles fast.

"Stop it!" I said, but they couldn't even hear me.

"You ruined everything," Grey said, while Valentine tried to push his arm back but couldn't. Grey's wings exploded on his back, too, tearing that blue shirt to pieces. "It's because of you that we're here, you little shit. You're lucky she cares about you because I've been dreaming about breaking you in half."

"Grey, please" I said, moving around them so I could grab his arm. "Let go. Right now—let go." Wasn't it enough that we had to go through all that, but they wanted to fight now, too?

I wouldn't allow it.

But the way Grey was looking at Valentine, who had closed his eyes and had rested his head on the wall like he'd surrendered, freaked me out. He wasn't kidding—he would really break Valentine in half right now if he could.

"Grey," I warned because if he didn't let go I might have a fucking heart attack. With the way my heart was beating, I wouldn't even be surprised.

Grey must have heard the urgency in my voice because he finally moved back. He let go of Valentine and stepped back, and his wings disappeared, too.

"Always so goddamn dramatic," said Valentine as he fixed his shirt, pretending he wasn't bothered—but he was. He was very much bothered. I saw it in his eyes and heard it in his voice when Shadow landed on his shoulder, those small beady eyes on Grey. "Relax, Shadow. We can't hurt him—not right now." And he forced himself to grin at Grey.

"You—" Grey was going to attack again.

My hands were around his forearm and I felt his muscles clenching, so I moved first and got between them.

" Enough! " I hissed. "Are you trying to fucking kill me? Stop with this bullshit—both of you!"

Unfortunately for me, they were both taller than me, so they had no problem locking eyes right over my head.

But, fortunately, they both stopped and stepped back. They'd didn't attack each other again. They listened.

With a sigh, I turned to Valentine. "You can't honestly think you'll find ways to hide this from the sirens, can you?"

Because that sounded like a goddamn miracle and my mind was already getting away from me with hopes and ideas.

"I do," Valentine said, eyes on Grey still. "All magics can be hidden with the right spells and preparations, maybe potions, too. And I know who to talk to about it."

"The sirens will find you."

"They won't. I'll be traveling in disguise—don't you worry about me, Sunshine. They're not looking for me, they're looking for you. That's why it's important to erase you from their radar completely. Otherwise there's nowhere you can go that they won't find you." He stepped closer and finally looked at me. "We really don't have the time."

"We do. We can stay here for now, see what the sirens do." That was a good plan, too.

"Realistically speaking, it will take the sirens roughly two to three days to break through whatever spell Mamayka hides us under," Grey said, making me turn to him, too. "And that's if we're lucky.'

"He's right," said Valentine. "Two days is a good bet. I can be back in two days, hide you and take you away."

I flinched. "I don't trust you, Valentine. Not even close to enough to just let you go!" Not to mention I was scared shitless that the sirens would find him and kill him, and I wouldn't even be there to try to stop them.

I didn't want him to die, damn it. Maybe that made me a fool, but I didn't want Valentine to die.

"You don't need to trust me, Sunshine. But really—what other choice do you have?" He grinned like the devil. "You want to send that brute out there where everyone will recognize him? The sirens will find him before sunrise." And he nodded his head at Grey.

Grey clenched his jaws hard but said nothing, and my God, Valentine was right. Grey was not meant to do sneaky shit—he either threatened you to your face or didn't bother at all.

"Fuck," I whispered because he made sense. As much as I didn't trust Valentine, it made sense to try to find a way to hide me from the sirens before it was too late.

"Exactly," the asshole said, grinning still because he knew he'd won.

"But…what if you get caught?" What if the sirens found him somehow, even when he disguised himself?

He shrugged, completely relaxed. "I'll either die out there or I come back. One or the other."

That sounded awful .

For a moment, we all paused, staring at nothing, thinking.

"You really think there's a way to hide what she did?" I finally asked because that was the most important thing still.

"I do. Syra hid herself all the time and she was perfectly undetectable even by her sisters. She joked about how easy it was to do."

"But we're no sirens," I reminded him, and he nodded.

"Which is why we'll find ways to reinforce whatever blanket spell I find out there." He sounded so sure of himself I envied him.

"And what about the end of the world?"

The brothers looked at one another, then at me. Neither could tell me anything.

"I'll be back as soon as I can. You'll be safe here. He'll die before he lets them hurt you," said Valentine, nodding at Grey again, but Grey didn't comment. "If there's a way, we'll find it. If there isn't, we'll all die, anyway. What does it matter if Ennaris really ends for good?"

It mattered. Of course, it mattered. There were still people here, so many Enchanted who lived on these Isles—but I didn't say any of it out loud.

"Storm will take you where you need to go, and he'll stay with you," Grey said when I stepped to his side and intertwined my fingers with his.

"There's no need. I?—"

"Storm will take you where you need to go," Grey repeated. "And he will stay with you all the time."

Valentine flinched. "Everyone will know where I am if people see your dragon flying around, brother."

"Don't worry, he won't be seen," Grey simply said.

"I don't need a babysitter," said Valentine, but I was with Grey on this one. Yes, it was risky for Storm to be out there, but he would help Valentine if something happened. He could save his life simply by taking him up in the air and flying away, something Shadow couldn't do.

"But you'll take it," I told Valentine. "That's the deal—Storm comes with you."

Closing his eyes, he clenched his jaws so hard we heard it. "Fine."

"Where is Storm, anyway?" I asked Grey, turning to the darkened sky because it occurred to me that I hadn't seen him flying anywhere.

"In the woods around the Paradise," said Grey. "I told him to stick to the ground for now."

The woods around the Paradise. The first place where I'd felt true magic, where I'd seen it. Where I'd chased animals with glowing fur and played that piano made of tree roots.

Shivers washed all over me at the reminder. At the thought that I could do that same thing now with my own magic. With my own energy. I could create my own melody, too—just like the soundmakers at Mina's.

"Then it is decided," I said. "You take Storm, and you try to find a blanket spell like Syra used before they come and end me."

Valentine smiled, but it was bitter as fuck. Before I knew it, he was in front of me, and he didn't even care that Grey was by my side.

"Nobody will hurt you, Sunshine. Don't you worry about a thing." And again, he kissed my forehead before he moved away.

" Fuck, I hate you so much… " Grey whispered so low I barely caught it, but he didn't attack Valentine, or even look at him at all—his eyes were closed.

I stifled a smile.

"I will see you soon," Valentine said. "But don't wait up for me."

With a wink, he turned around and walked back into the building, leaving us alone in the dark.