Chapter 16

“Ithink everyone is forgetting that some of us live an eternity away, have only just arrived, and must be informed of the situation before they explode with confusion!” Matilda said, pouring champagne from the bottle she had brought with her from Albion’s prize collection. “Who the devil is Simon?”

Anna opened her mouth to reply, but Leah jumped in ahead of her.

“The Earl of Luminport. Very handsome, very kind, very pleasant, and absolutely besotted with our darling Anna!”

Olivia nodded eagerly. “Evan knows him, so I made some enquiries. Apparently, he is just lovely. He has two sisters, neither married, and I hear they are delightful too, so our sweet Anna will have ladies to keep her company at her new residence instead of being surrounded by men all the time.”

“Max and Dickie seem to approve, too,” Phoebe chimed in, offering an encouraging smile to Anna. “I may or may not have overheard Max speaking with Lord Luminport, and they were enjoying a very amiable conversation.”

Having not had everyone together in such a long time, Anna had forgotten how chaotic their Club meetings could be sometimes. Then again, she had never been the central point of conversation at one of their gatherings, and it made her wonder if her friends had felt this way—awkward and overwhelmed—when they were in the first tentative stages of romance with their respective partners.

Indeed, as Anna sat back and sipped her champagne, the grand study had likely never experienced such a din, as the effusive back and forth of her friends continued.

It was the first room they had found that was far enough away from the drawing room, but close enough to the main staircase if any of the mothers among them happened to be needed upstairs. Although, Evan, Daniel, and Nathaniel all knew that Spinsters’ Club time was sacred, so they probably would not have bothered them anyway.

Matilda clapped her hands together, demanding silence. “Anna, I must hear it from you! Who is this fellow to you? Is he the Odysseus to your Penelope?”

Anna turned up her nose. “I hope not.”

“The Hero to your Leander? The Paris to your Helen? The Orpheus to your Eurydice?”

She had to laugh. “Might you choose something less tragic?”

Matilda grimaced. “Oh, you know I am no good at these modern novels you so adore.” She paused for a while. “I have it! Is he the Edward Ferrars to your Elinor Dashwood?”

“Simon is… very pleasant,” Anna replied, with a sigh. “He is interesting, he is kind, he is… somewhat amusing. I am enjoying the experience of getting to know a gentleman beyond one silent, uncomfortable dance.”

Phoebe raised her hand. “You had two dances once. Do not forget that.”

“And both were silent and uncomfortable,” Anna reminded them, smiling.

Whether it was because she had miraculously gone beyond that awkward first encounter, or whether she was simply too old now to care, she did not know, but she no longer felt as embarrassed about her former forays into courtship as she once had.

“Look at that smile!” Olivia cheered. “That is the smile of a woman in love. You cannot deny it.”

Anna took a larger gulp of her drink, the effervescence tickling her nose. “I am not in love, Olivia. Simon and I are… friendly, at present. I do not know if it shall become anything more, so please do not start picturing my future with his sisters, talking of my ‘new residence.’ I have already moved once this year.”

“But… he likes you,” Leah said, frowning.

Olivia nodded. “He has shown his interest.”

A curious sting pinched Anna’s stomach as she looked upon the faces of those two friends, hearing the desperation in their words. With a sinking sadness, she understood their real meaning—if not Simon, then who? At six-and-twenty, who else was there likely to be?

“Because he likes me, that means I must settle without knowing my own feelings?” she asked, a note more coldly than she had intended. They meant well.

Phoebe came over to perch on the armrest of Anna’s chair, and put her arm around her shoulders, hugging her. “Of course not, sweetling. If he is not for you, then he is not for you.”

“Goodness, I am sorry,” Olivia blurted out. “I got carried away, that is all.”

Matilda nodded and headed over to pour more champagne for Anna. “If it is to be no man at all, then I shall champion you always. There is such power in not being what society expects you to be. All you need do is look at your good friend, the Countess, to know that.” She sat down at Anna’s feet. “If it were not for Albion, it would still be no man at all for me, too.”

“Might we not speak of Simon for a while?” Anna asked, feeling more loved than she had done in an age as her friends all crowded around her. “I have missed this. I have missed all of you.”

Phoebe chewed her lower lip. “And the rest of us, I fear, have been remiss in our friendship with you. I promise, I will endeavor to be better, to see you more.” She smiled. “For I have missed this, too.”

“It feels as if we are younger again, does it not?” Leah said wistfully.

Olivia nodded. “I have missed this, very much.”

“What about Percival?” Matilda said suddenly, his name prompting Anna to jump in her seat.

“Percival?” Phoebe scoffed. “Matilda, I think you have had too much champagne already. We were all saying how much we miss this time together, and you go and mention him, of all people. You know she does not like him very much, and she did just put a croquet ball through his head, so there is likely even less affability between them.”

Matilda tilted her head back, peering up at Anna. “Love has grown from worse. And you have known him almost your entire life. Has he never intimated any interest in you? Did he not bring you orchids once?”

“They were for his chambers, to make them smell sweeter. He stole orchids from my mother’s flower beds,” Anna insisted, that feverish rush beginning to rise up her throat once more. “And I ripped them out of his hand so he could not have them.”

Four-and-ten years later, she could still remember her horror, seeing him standing there at the ornamental garden gate, mocking her with those precious things in his clutches. How furious she had been when she had run at him, tearing them from him. He must have known who they belonged to, and he had picked them anyway.

But I gave him an orchid once… She could not believe she had forgotten that, and her heart sank to think of what that gift had cost him. Both of them.

Matilda frowned. “Are you certain? I could have sworn you said he brought them to you to apologize.”

“I have heard Percival apologize to me once in the entire time I have known him, and there were no flowers. So, yes, I am certain.” Anna’s mind drifted once more to that awful night, the petals falling around her.

But there were things I mistook before, she mused, his tragic story playing through her thoughts. She would have to ask him about the bunch of orchids, to be sure, though she was fairly certain they had not been intended as an apology.

Matilda refilled her glass. “So, not Percival then?”

“Percival and I are…” Anna’s mind faltered, unable to pluck out the right word. “We are… friends. Just friends. Not even friends, the majority of the time, though we are learning to be more civil with one another. Friends by circumstance, I suppose you could call it. If it were not for my brother, I likely would not have any reason to speak to Percival again.”

A funny look appeared on Phoebe’s face. “But did you not say you were helping him find a match? Why would you do that if you dislike the man?”

“And you were an awfully long time in the drawing room after you smacked that croquet ball into his head,” Leah remarked, their intensity causing Anna to sweat afresh.

Olivia squinted. “You ran to him rather swiftly, too. I doubt I have ever seen such tender worry upon someone’s face, especially not someone who does not like the person they accidentally injured.”

It was all too much, combined with the champagne and the sweltering heat of the study, and the friends crowded around her. Anna pushed up off the armchair and walked to the door, offering a feeble excuse of, “I shall fetch us another bottle of champagne from Beatrice’s cellar,” before she slipped out.

She waited to hear footsteps in the hallway behind her, but, graciously, no one followed.

Was I like that with them? She could not remember, though she was aware that she had always championed the possibility of love. They had teased her for it often enough, only to eventually admit that she had been right when they finally fell in love with their respective husbands.

Still, she did not know if she liked being at the center of such an intense inquisition. It just served to make her feel like her time for romance was running out, as if she did not already know that.

* * *

“Is that a little mouse I hear, sniffing around for a piece of expensive cheese?” Dickie’s voice called down the cellar steps as Anna was making her ascent with a slightly dusty bottle of champagne.

“Beatrice said I could,” Anna replied. “You do not have her permission, and I will not sneak you a bottle, so do not ask.”

“How unkind you are to your favorite brother.”

Anna saw him silhouetted in the cellar doorway and could not resist smiling. “Who said you were my favorite?”

“Ah yes, for Max’s sake, we should keep that a secret.” Dickie stretched down his hand to help his sister up the last few steps, back into the warm light of the kitchens.

Brushing dust off her skirts, she weaved her arm through her brother’s. “What brings you down here? Were you sent to ensure I had not fallen to my death?”

“Matilda was worried. She challenged me to find you within ten minutes, so do not think this is a selfless act.” He grinned. “I simply have a sense for where you might be hiding when you are overwhelmed.”

Anna continued to brush the dust from her skirts, though there was not a speck left. “Who said I was overwhelmed?”

“Matilda suspected they had been too… aggressive, though she would not say about what. They are waiting in the study for you, to resume the revelries.” Dickie took the champagne bottle from her, tucked it under his free arm, and led her out into the labyrinth of hallways. “Is it, perchance, to do with Lord Luminport?”

Anna cast him an imploring look, and he gave a discreet nod of understanding.

“What of you?” she said stiffly. “Has anyone captured your attention? Caro, perhaps?”

Of course, she knew that Caroline had shown some interest in her brother, and that he had shown interest in her in return, but with Dickie, that didn’t always mean much. Nevertheless, she would not allow him to hurt Caro, and intended to warn him that if he was not serious with his intentions, he should leave her be.

First, however, she wanted to gauge the potential.

Dickie smiled, but it did not reach his eyes as it usually did. “Caro is, perhaps, the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Any gentleman would be a king if he were to have such a lady at his side, but I feel nothing beyond a friendly affection toward her.” He cast his sister a sideways glance. “There is no need to scold me or warn me, Anna. I have already decided to keep my distance. I do not want to hurt her any more than anyone wants to see her hurt.”

“What? But… you seemed to be getting along so well.” Anna had not expected that sort of awareness from her brother; she had already been rehearsing the mild threat she had meant to give him.

Dickie nodded. “That is part of the trouble, I think. We agree on everything, and though that is a lovely thing in a friend, it is—to my shame—rather boring in a bridal possibility.” He squeezed Anna’s arm. “She feels the same, before you berate me. I have encountered enough ladies to know when I am boring one.”

“But a happy marriage is built upon agreeing, and two people sharing the same values, and thinking alike!” Anna protested.

They turned a corner onto the main hallway, where the sound of music and laughter echoed up to the cavernous ceilings, coming from the glowing light of the drawing room at the farthest end.

Dickie hesitated and pressed on. “You think I know nothing of love, and perhaps you are right, but what I do know is that a marriage is successful when you want to be together despite your disagreements. When you do not see eye to eye on everything, but you look out on your life together anyway, because that is what you agree on the most—being with one another, and only one another.”

Astonished, Anna almost missed her footing as she walked along at her brother’s side. Never in her life would she have thought that Dickie could sound so wise and, moreover, that she would see the sense in what he said.

Nor was it the only thing he had said that struck a chord in her. The way he spoke of Caroline was exactly the way she currently felt about Simon: He was handsome, he was sweet, and any woman would be lucky to have him at her side… but she felt nothing beyond a friendly affection. It was not the fierce and fiery love she had always declared she would find in the real world. It was not even close.

“No retort?” Dickie teased. “No damning lecture? No protest?”

Anna gazed ahead at the pool of light spilling from the drawing room. “I am thinking of one.”

But as they parted ways halfway down the hall, Anna retrieving the champagne before Dickie could scamper off with it, she still had no reply for him. She could pick no hole in his argument, though a few were forming in her own.

Perhaps she had been looking at things all wrong.