Chapter 8

Audrey awoke one morning to a darkened room, feeling exhausted but much more aware of her surroundings. She slowly moved her head to look at the other side of the room.

The duke, sitting next to the bed, was reading a book, which he dropped to the floor when he heard her sighing.

"Lettie, Miss Banks, you're awake," he cried, taking her hand in his and looking as if he was about to embrace her. Her thoughts were clouded by confusion for a moment, wondering who Lettie was, before she remembered she was Lettie Banks. Then realizing that it was the duke, sitting by her bed and holding her hand.

Audrey tried to speak but found no voice as her throat was too dry. She smiled as she heard the duke calling, "Nurse, come quickly, she's awake."

Over the next hour, Audrey learned what had happened to her and how near to death she had been. Everyone else was well, including little Sasha.

Audrey knew she was well on the way to recovery when Sasha was allowed to visit the sickroom. In her excitement at seeing Audrey, Sasha reverted to speaking French.

"Bonjour, Mademoiselle Lettie. J"ai une fleur pour vous," she chirped.

Audrey responded, without thinking, in French. "Bonjour, ma chère petite Sasha. Merci. Quelle belle fleur jaune." Audrey sniffed the bright flower, picked from the garden. "Now we must speak English so that Nurse Walters and Mrs. Driscoll can understand us. Your mother spoke French?"

"Always, Mademoiselle, except with my Papa. I am remembering more now," Sasha replied, twirling around the room in pirouettes. "I was worried you would die like Mama. We prayed every day, didn't we, Mrs. Driscoll?"

"Indeed we did, Miss Sasha. We are so glad Miss Banks has recovered now." Mrs. Driscoll, who was escorting Sasha, agreed.

And I am better,thought Audrey. I feel stronger every day. I'm so thankful that no one else fell ill. She smiled, thinking of the selfless action of those who had nursed her, and particularly Nurse Walters, who had chosen to join them through loyalty to The Duke of Clairville.

"I talk to Flossie with the words Mama used at home. I tell her ‘ici' to come and ‘s"asseoir' to sit. Mrs. Driscoll is using the same words and Flossie sometimes understands. Flossie is very clever. I wasn't allowed to bring her to see you today, but Nurse Walters says she can come next time."

Audrey felt a warm glow of happiness at the sight of the small child confidently talking about the little spaniel, who was helping the healing process.

She watched Sasha exploring her room, marveling at the mural of trees, interspersed with gold paint. Mrs. Driscoll jumped up, startled, as Sasha announced it would be a good idea to paint a fairy in the forest.

Audrey stepped in, suggesting they paint a grand picture of fairies and trees to put on the wall in the nursery bedroom. Sasha, excited by the idea, began planning how it would look. A relieved Mrs. Driscoll looked at Audrey and whispered her thanks.

Nurse Walters bustled in, reminding Sasha she must not make Miss Banks too tired. Nurse Walters then told Sasha that she knew that Cook was waiting to make butterfly cakes with her. Sure enough, this distracted Sasha, and she hugged Audrey, saying she would return soon before tugging at Mrs. Driscoll's arm as they made their way to the kitchen.

Nurse Walters plumped the pillow and gave Audrey some lemonade to drink. "You've got to keep your strength up, miss. Cook will send up a bowl of chicken broth soon. You do look better though; I think seeing that little girl has done you good."

"Indeed, Nurse, Sasha has proved to be a delight. She enjoys every moment of life. I can't help but smile when I am with her."

"She is going to love the Clairville estate. I noticed she talked of fairies and forests and there is a path through the forest there which takes you past a lake. His Grace's father had a trail of little, tiny houses, some in the trees and some in the glade built for his children. Little Sasha will have such fun exploring that woodland walk."

"That sounds wonderful," said Audrey. "I believe we can travel to Clairville as soon as I am strong enough." She hesitated before continuing. "How long ago did His Grace's father die?"

Nurse Walters took the lemonade glass from Audrey's hands. "It's fourteen years since His Grace lost his father. That was a sad day—his father was so young, and a more loving and involved father I've never known. His own father, Jude's grandfather, had been rather austere and distant, and he made the decision to be different. He made a love match to Jude's mother, and they were devoted to each other."

"His Grace told me he has six sisters and no brothers," said Audrey.

"Oh my goodness, he does indeed. Two are older than him, and three are younger. The two youngest are twins." Nurse Walters looked wistful as she remembered the arrival of the twins. "I saw her ladyship through that confinement. I still remember all the faces when I came out to tell them that the duchess was safely delivered of twins, two baby girls. That was fifteen years ago now."

"They must have been tiny children when their father died," said Audrey.

"Only a year old—mere babes."

"Was he ill? Something like I've had?"

"No, miss, it was a carriage accident. He was returning home late one night and one of the horses pulling the curricle was startled and bolted, throwing the duke from the carriage. He was gone, leaving her ladyship mourning his loss and Master Jude becoming duke at such a young age."

"That's so sad. They sound to have been very much in love."

"Ah, they were that. They were inseparable, and created a home filled with laughter and love, and her ladyship has continued that philosophy. We all remember the old duke with such affection." Nurse Walters smiled. "He decorated this house with her ladyship. They wanted a wall painting, a mural in every room, and I think he painted some of that forest scene himself."

"It's beautiful. Every time I look at it, I see something different," said Audrey, gazing at the mural and noticing again how it sparkled in the sunshine.

Audrey's heart went out to the children, and their mother, living with their sadness. She thought of His Grace, a duke at fourteen, mourning his father and trying to be the man of the house.

The closeness between them was new but growing in strength. When The duke was with her, reading aloud from the wonderful new novel he had found, it made her cry. At times she became angry with the characters, and at others she laughed at their antics. Sometimes when they laughed together, their eyes met and, within the close comfort of his presence, she felt a tiny flame of passion.

The previous evening, Audrey had tried to thank him for his kindness to her, and to little Sasha. He'd responded protesting that he would do the same for anyone, and it was nothing out of the ordinary.

Yet she was sure, from her memory of the urgency in his voice while she had the fever, that he cared about her at some level. When his eyes met hers, she felt warmth, and the knowledge she was wanted, even though no words were spoken. While ill, she had occasionally turned her head on the pillow and caught him gazing at her so intently that tiny sparks of promised passion coursed had through her body.

Even if she was right and there was something more than a level of attraction between them, there was no future for them. How could she trust any man after the way her brother had behaved? Yet, even as she thought this, she knew there was something pathologically wrong with her brother's personality. He had always enjoyed cruelty, taunting her by hurting the kitchen cat, or pulling the wings off butterflies and laughing.

The reality was that none of that mattered. She was not Miss Letitia Banks, she was Lady Audrey Rowe, living under false pretenses as an impoverished governess.

If he knew her secret, how would he react? She had lived in his home, in close confinement, under a false identity. She would no doubt be thrown out onto the streets. Even knowing that she faced the danger of discovery, she was prepared to take the risk, craving that closeness which grew stronger every time he visited the sickroom.

***

The next day, Audrey woke, noticing the spring sunshine brightening the room and catching the gold paint on the forest mural. She felt well, and thought perhaps she might get dressed and go into the garden. How she longed to be outdoors again and feel the warmth of the sunshine on her face.

For the first time in days, she eased herself out of bed, pulled on her robe, and made her way to the window. She was frustrated at how weak her legs were, and it took a long time to cross the room.

She recognized the book on the side table and smiled to herself, imagining the duke reading the next few chapters. One of the heroines was desperately ill with a fever, which sounded very much like a putrid sore throat. Would she recover and true love win through?

Suddenly, she heard the contralto tone of a familiar voice in the distance.

It can't be. Franny? Has the fever returned?

"I'm Mrs. Francine Weston, I've come to visit my friend. I received a letter saying she was here and very ill."

Audrey heard the voice of Mrs. Driscoll as she suggested the visitor might return later in the day.

"Absolutely not. I received a letter from the Duke of Clairville telling me she was here, and I insist on seeing her now." Audrey heard Franny's reply and couldn't help but smile.

The door opened and Rosie entered, looking flustered. "I'm sorry, miss, but Mrs. Driscoll sent me. There's a lady arrived to see you, an erm… very forceful lady, who insists on seeing you immediately."

"It's all right, Rosie, I recognized the voice. tell Mrs. Driscoll I know Mrs. Weston and you can show her in."

Nurse Walters entered the room. "Ask the lady to wait in the drawing room, please. Miss Banks needs to have her tea and breakfast broth before she sees any visitors. I'm not allowing anything that might cause a relapse."

"But …" protested Audrey. "It is quite all right. I know her well."

"I haven't nursed you back to health to have some busy body of a lady come into this room fussing and shouting, which…" and she held up her hand as Audrey tried to speak before continuing, "which is what she is doing at this moment. I do not like her attitude toward Mrs. Driscoll. It lacks courtesy. She can wait till you are ready to receive her, miss."

Audrey gave in, already feeling weary, and allowed Nurse Walters to bring her broth beside the fire. Audrey had to admit it did make her feel better. She allowed Rosie to brush and dress her hair, recognizing that she was still a long way from being back to full strength.

A knock on the door and Mrs. Driscoll entered, dressed formally in a dark gray dress and lace cap, every inch the competent housekeeper again. "Mrs. Francine Weston," she announced, handing Audrey a visitors' card.

"Thank you, Mrs. Driscoll, I'll be glad to see her," said Audrey. "Would it be possible for you to bring us some tea, please?"

Mrs. Driscoll looked urgently at Audrey and whispered to her under her breath, "She is calling you by another name. She claims you are a lady and a close acquaintance. I would have sent her away, but she is waving a letter the duke sent. Are you sure you are well enough to see her?"

"Thank you. I do know her, and I'll explain everything once she has gone." Audrey told Mrs. Driscoll

"Very well, miss. I'll show her in."

A whirlwind of color, a jeweled turban, followed by the strong scent of the perfume of lemon and lily of the valley, swept into the room. Audrey found herself enfolded in an embrace.

After looking around the room, Franny turned to Rosie and Nurse Walters, and told them they could leave.

Audrey gasped at the expression on Nurse Walters' face. This looked like at the very least a skirmish, if not all-out war.

Nurse Walters looked determined to stand her ground in her own sickroom. "I will stay with my patient, My Lady," she declared. "I'll sit in the corner with my tatting," and sat down in a chair near the hearth.

After a moment, deciding whether she could evict Nurse Walters, Franny nodded at Nurse Walters, who had already begun her tatting. Audrey smiled and thought her fierce friend Mrs. Francine Weston had possibly found her match in Nurse Walters. Sitting, seething in the corner, with the clack, clack of her tatting, there was no dislodging Nurse Walters from her post.

"Well, of all the …." said Franny, before thinking better of it, and turning instead to her friend, looking her up and down and tutting with disapproval.

"Aud, what on earth has happened to you? You've lost weight, you must be light as a feather, and your skin, your pallor is gaunt. His Grace, the Duke of Clairville sent a letter asking me to visit."

All Audrey could do was nod and sit back in her chair, so the firm back could support her weakened body and give her strength.

"He told me of a young lady in his household and what had happened to bring her here. He gave a description and, as soon as I read it, I knew it had to be you, my dear."

Audrey nodded again.

"He went on to tell me that this young lady was seriously ill, and he was attempting to trace her family."

Franny paused and took a breath, "Did that housekeeper say she was bringing tea?"

Audrey nodded before finally speaking. "The household is at sixes and sevens with the quarantine just ended, and the little girl, Miss Sasha, needing a lot of care and attention. While I've been ill, Mrs. Driscoll, the housekeeper, and Rosie the maid have undertaken that role, and very competently too."

"It does sound as though there are many difficulties here. I'm sure she will return soon. Where was I? Ah, yes, we only returned from Bath late last night, and the letter was waiting for us. And here we are. You have to tell me what's been happening to you."

Audrey looked at the lady who had been her mother's closest, dearest friend. After her mama's death, Francine Weston had been like a mother to her, and was now her closest friend. Brash in manner, she said what she thought, but with the kindest of hearts. Audrey was fond of her and took Franny's hand patting it reassuringly.

"I'm fine, Franny, truly I am. I wasn't, though, and I have been very sick. If it wasn't for Nurse Walters and His Grace, then I believe I would not have survived. The story he told you in his letter about the child and the quarantine is all true. Today is the first day I've been able to get out of bed."

"I can see what happened after you arrived here, however, I fail to see why you were at the Bell Inn, and why you are calling yourself Miss Letitia Banks. What possessed you to run away from Rowton Castle and take a position as a governess? I understand you were engaged to work for a family in Harrogate?

"I have told the duke that you are indeed Lady Audrey Rowe. The poor man has been trying to trace your family and located me. From the description he gave it was clear that you were Miss Lettie, and I wrote last night to tell him how to find your family."

Audrey paled. Nurse Walters looked across the room in alarm, asking if she needed smelling salts.

Before Audrey could answer, Franny had taken Audrey's arm and produced her own smelling salts out of her reticule and wafted them under Audrey's nose.

"I'm sorry to upset you, my dear. I don"t know what has happened between you and Ethan, but His Grace is right to want to reunite you with your family." Franny said.

"I know, Franny. The trouble is that I found living at Rowton Castle intolerable. I refuse to be beaten by my brother again. He is a thoroughly unpleasant man who delights in inflicting pain on others."

"You have your own fortune, you could have come to stay with Horace and myself," declared Franny.

Audrey sighed, looking longingly out of the window to the blue sky. "I know, I suspect he waited till you were out of town to put his scheme in place. He told me I would marry the Duke of Batton in a few days" time. It was essential for the future of the family that the marriage took place quickly. Even with your support, I believe he was determined I should comply. There is some ulterior motive, and I can only assume it is financial."

"But how did you find a position as governess?" asked Franny.

"I answered an advertisement in the Morning Gazette and, after securing the position, I begged Rupert to help me escape to the coaching inn. I expected Ethan would pursue me, so I changed my name to Miss Letitia Banks. They know me here as Lettie."

"Oh my dear child, I cannot believe your brother meant to cause this level of distress. He has misunderstood, it should easily be put right. Shall I speak to him? He may take some notice of me."

"I"d like to think that might help, but the reality is that he is so hell bent on his scheme that I doubt he would listen to anyone. It's too late anyway. I'm not going to marry the duke, so Ethan will let it be known that I'm ruined. There will be no love match and happy ending for me." Audrey said sadly.

"But …"

"I'm happy enough with my chosen path, Franny. Truly. I had hoped to stay here and be governess to little Sasha, but it seems likely His Grace will now dismiss me for lying and being deceitful about my identity," Audrey barely spoke above a whisper, the words dry as dust in her throat.

So, the duke now knew she had lied. Desolation, like a cold wave, made her shiver, as she saw how it could look to the man who had taken her in and showered her with kindness and generosity of spirit.

The stone-cold reality was that Ethan would arrive at the duke's to collect his sister. She imagined that, if she refused to go with him, he would begin rumors about her character, and who would then want anything to do with a hoyden?

With devastating certainty, she knew the duke would dismiss her for her deceit. He helped save my life by giving me refuge here, then helping nurse me back to life, urging me to join him in the spring sunshine, thought Audrey, and I have repaid him with lies. I wish this was a nightmare, but I know it isn't.

"I'll find another situation as a governess or companion and make my way in the world," Audrey told Franny. "You know, I've been happy here, even though I arrived here so unexpectedly and then been so ill. I can be happy elsewhere; I know now that it's possible."

"You know you can stay with me at Allington Place." Franny offered.

"I know, and it helps to know I have a place to go, a family that cares. You are my family, Franny, but I cannot impose on your kindness and stay with you."

"But …" protested Franny.

"I cannot. I need to find work and I have done that; I'm doing that now. When I'm settled, I intend to contact the family attorney and find out about my inheritance. I know I was due to come into my money at twenty-five, but if Ethan is to be believed, there is nothing left. I don't believe a word my brother says."

"I find it hard to believe you have no inheritance. You are right to question that. You know if you need any help then Horace will support you," Franny told Audrey.

"I know. You are the kindest people." Audrey said smiling "A little fearsome sometimes. I suspect Mrs. Driscoll will remember you for a while."

They both laughed and the knock on the door heralded the return of Mrs. Driscoll with a tray of tea. Franny took a deep breath and started to speak to Mrs. Driscoll, who was so startled she almost dropped the tray. Audrey jumped up to prevent the tray falling onto the Aubusson rug.

As usual, Franny had little awareness of her impact on those around her and continued speaking while Audrey and Mrs. Driscoll saved the Limoges tea set from disaster.

"I must apologize for my strident manner when I arrived. There is no excuse. I was concerned for the welfare of my young friend here."

"Her bark is noisy, but there is no bite, Mrs. Driscoll," Audrey reassured her. "Since my mother died, Mrs. Weston has been like a mother to me, and her tone was only due to concern for me."

"Well, miss, it is good to see you up and about, laughing and happy," Mrs. Driscoll said before turning to Franny. "And thank you for your apology, My Lady. It is unusual for a fine lady to think of others. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must retrieve Miss Sasha from the kitchen, or cook will be so distracted that there will be no dinner for His Grace.

Franny stayed to enjoy a cup of fragrant tea and talked of a ball she would be attending the following week. Audrey, feeling stronger, suggested a walk in the garden and they set off toward the pergola.

"You realize His Grace knows you are not this Miss Letitia Banks. What will you do? You can hardly work as a governess as Lady Audrey Rowe."

"You're right. I've never heard of a governess with a title. I think I'll stay as Lettie for the time being. Sasha, the little girl I was telling you about, knows me as Lettie and it could be confusing for her if I changed my name. Although I don't think I will be her governess for long.

"As I mentioned, it is likely that His Grace will dismiss me, now he knows I've lived here under false pretenses." Audrey told Franny as an overwhelming feeling of sadness came over her at the idea of leaving her small charge. She hoped, against hope, that she could stay here.

Her mind drifted to the duke, knowing that leaving him would be leaving a part of her life. Her friend"s voice brought her back into the present moment. A blackbird flew into a cherry tree in front of them and began to sing and she needed to remember there were always good things to see. She took a deep breath, enjoying the birdsong.

"And what of your brother? Your secret is out. I'm sorry for my part in it, but I had no idea you had run away and were living under a false identity." Franny asked Audrey, and then continued before Audrey could reply, "There is something strange about this marriage he was coercing you into. If a young lady of quality is to be married then you would expect preparations, invitations, and a party. As one of your closest friends, I'd certainly expect to be invited."

"It seemed clandestine to me," agreed Audrey, stooping to pick a daisy peeping out from the path. "He pretty much imprisoned me and told me I would be married within days."

"He must have obtained a special license. There was no time for banns to be called. It is most irregular," Franny said thoughtfully.

"I could not and will not go through with this marriage," Audrey was determined.

"Of course not. It would be reckless of him to pursue this plan further. Tell me, Audrey," Franny smiled, her eyes twinkling, "sorry, erm Lettie… Did you ever meet your fiancé? I'm wondering if he knew this was a forced marriage."

"I did, he came to take tea on one occasion. He seemed a nice enough man. I think he was around the same age as father, and he asked me about my life and interests, and told me about his country estate in Wiltshire. I think he was building a garden, transforming his park into a more modern style. I rather liked the conversation, but that doesn't mean I want to marry him."

"It is entirely possible he knew nothing about Ethan's scheme," added Franny. "I am surprised at your brother. There is an element of mental instability in his actions."

Audrey felt a little tired but enjoyed strolling along the path with her friend. The blues and yellows of the spring flowers made the garden a delightful place to walk and talk. She turned around, holding her face up toward the sun, feeling its warmth melting her fear of Ethan. "I think you are too kind about Ethan, Franny. I suspect he is deranged, and there is nothing rational in his actions." Audrey shuddered. "I know I will see him again and I dread that day."

They walked back to the house in companionable silence, parting with promises to meet soon, and a repeat of Franny's invitation that Audrey come and stay with her, if even for only a short while.

Sasha was waiting for Audrey in the green bedroom. Audrey felt pure happiness at seeing the way Sasha had set a little table with lace-trimmed linen and napkins. Cook had provided a range of savory and sweet pastries and jellies.

The little girl looked so proud when Audrey told her how special it looked, and to run and ask Mrs. Driscoll to come and join them for tea.

When Rosie came to tell Audrey that His Grace had asked her to join him in the library, she felt her heart sink.

How sad,thought Audrey, that we've had this little tea party and Sasha seems so happy and I will probably have to tell her that I am leaving.

"Thank you, Rosie, please tell him that I shall join him directly."

Audrey stood wearily and reluctantly made her way to the door. So many times when she had been ill, she had longed to see him and hear him read more of the book by the lady. His voice and his face had given her comfort each day. Now she dreaded what he would say. He knew she had lied about her identity, and although it was for justifiable reasons, would he believe her explanation?