Chapter 10

CHAPTER10

Leo thought he made a mistake, but a moment later, she appeared in the doorway, looking down at her feet, refusing to lift her gaze to meet his. He instantly realized why. He was naked from his waist up, something he had gotten used to since it had been only him and the staff. His mother never spent the night here although she liked to come and visit often.

“Do you have a habit of walking around naked frequently?” she asked, her cheeks flaring up the moment she spoke.

He chuckled. He was actually about to offer a poor excuse of an apology for his indecency, but now that she had started off this conversation in a different direction, he immediately changed his mind. To be quite honest, he liked this direction far better than the other one.

“Well, I am in my own home, am I not?” he shrugged, inhaling deeply so that his chest rose up and spread even more widely. “I was used to living alone. Night shirts feel constrictive somehow. I prefer to sleep like this.” Again, it sounded like an apologetic explanation although he didn’t mean for it to sound like that. Then, he thought of something interesting to add, just to see her reaction. “Does the sight of my naked upper body offend you?”

He could immediately see her eyes flare up with indignation. “No,” she replied defiantly, looking straight at him. There was not a trace of that timidity from a moment ago. It was as if magically, he was wearing a shirt now. Only, he wasn’t. And she was looking at him. Wickedly, that was exactly what he wished to accomplish.

“While it is my house,” he continued, satisfied that he won this round, “it is yours as well.”

“For the time being,” she corrected him, still that tone of rebellion in her voice and that fire in her eyes.

“For the time being,” he agreed. “No matter how we came to this agreement, it is important that one feels at ease where one resides. This is your home, too, Jane.” The sound of her name on his lips sounded taunting. It awoke thoughts in him, the kind he would never reveal to her. “And I would never dream of disrespecting you in any way.” He paused, expecting her to say something, but she didn’t. She just kept looking at him with those wide eyes, framed by even longer eyelashes.

“Then, perhaps you could consider putting something on when you leave your chamber,” she suggested finally. There was that indignant intonation that amused him so.

“And sleeping?” he asked, teasing, tilting his head a little as he spoke to her. He loved looking at her. It only occurred to him now how much he enjoyed it.

“What about sleeping?” she frowned. He noticed that she took great effort not looking down at his chest even for a single moment.

“Can I sleep without a shirt?” he inquired.

Her brows knitted even more at this question. “Why on earth would I care about what you sleep in?”

“You care about what I wear around the house,” he shrugged again, relishing how he seemed to be touching her exactly where she did not wish to be touched.

“I care what you wear in places where I can see you,” she corrected him. “I cannot possibly imagine a situation where I would come to see you in your chamber at night when you are disrobed.”

He could think of a few plausible scenarios for that, but he remained silent, biting his tongue. It was obvious that she was doing her best at keeping a safe distance from him as if she feared that he might touch her or even worse, make her touch him. He wanted to assure her that she needed not fear any such thing, but then, he would reveal that he was thinking about kissing her and holding her in his arms. That was the last thing he wanted to admit right now. Or ever, for that matter.

Theirs was a marriage of convenience. She made it perfectly clear, and he made a promise to her that was what it would remain. It was a promise he did not particularly like, but a promise he nonetheless intended to keep. He gave his word as a gentleman.

“I shall confine my desire for a bare chest to my chamber from now on,” he said solemnly although he had a hard time suppressing a chuckle. She, on the other hand, showed no such inclinations. Her lips weren’t smiling. She didn’t even seem amused by his words.

“Please do so,” she said with a heavy sigh as if she were bored by him.

Perhaps he had crossed a line. To be quite honest, he had no idea where that line was. Was it allowed for them to become friends, at least? Would she even wish that? From the way she was speaking to him this evening, he doubted it was so. Then again, it was only their first night together as a husband and wife. Tomorrow would be a new day. Perhaps it would bring new developments with it.

“Did you come for a book?” he asked in an effort to change the topic and at least end it on a more pleasant note, seeing their accidental meeting did not start on anything of the sort.

“Sorry?” she asked, obviously not having heard him.

“Were you unable to sleep as well, and so you came in search of a good companion?” he asked, a little more elaborately this time. There was no hidden meaning behind this question. Simply mere curiosity.

“I was asleep,” she corrected him. “Then, I had a… nightmare.”

“What was it about?” he asked again.

Strangely, she blushed. “I would rather not discuss it if you don’t mind.”

“Was it that frightful?” he asked, smiling. He could not imagine monsters in the dark frightening someone like her.

“It was beyond anything you can imagine,” she said mysteriously. Now, he wanted to know it even more than before, but it was obvious that she refused to share it with him.

“What do you prefer?” he inquired gently, turning his back to the bookshelf.

“I prefer not to be forced to discuss things I do not wish to divulge,” she said defiantly.

Luckily, he was with his back to her. Her response amused him greatly. He knew that she was a sprite, but he had no idea how much. With each passing moment of this conversation, he was being more and more convinced that being married to her would be quite a task. Still, Leo considered himself always up for a challenge. And Jane was anything if not a challenge among challenges.

“I was referring to your reading tastes,” he said, suppressing a smirk although she would not be able to see it. He was certain, though, that she would be able to sense its presence just from the way he was speaking. She was like that, the impetuous creature. She paid attention to all the little details and nuances of a conversation, the manner in which someone was talking, even the way he was looking at her.

“Oh,” she managed to muster.

It was at that moment that he turned around. Their gazes locked once more. He wondered if he should be the one to leave and allow her the privacy of the library on her own.

Then, defiance set in again. This was his house. She was his wife. He meant what he told her. He would protect her. He would keep her safe. He would not let any harm come to her. But he would not be a stranger in his own home. She would need to learn to live with him, at least for the time being. They would, in fact, both need to adjust themselves to these new arrangements.

“Romance?” he suggested, trying to remain focused on the conversation and not to wander off in his mind.

“No,” she frowned.

“Poetry?” he tried again.

“Sometimes,” she replied. At least he was getting closer, but he still wasn’t too hopeful.

“History?” he tried another suggestion, eyeing Captain Cook’s Voyages on the shelf, one of his own personal favorites.

“Yes,” she nodded, much to his surprise.

He raised an eyebrow. “What in particular?”

“I enjoyed William Robertson’s History of the Americas in Two Volumes,” she replied then added. “Also, Captain Cook’s Voyages.”

This time, he could not hide his smirk. “You will find those as well as other history books in this entire row here,” he explained, pointing to the bookshelf with his index finger. “Feel free to take whichever you’d like.”

He didn’t think she would say anything to that. He didn’t think she would show any gratitude. After all, she was here forcefully, almost blackmailed into marrying him. Now, she was forced to bear witness to his naked, curly haired chest. He had to admit, he wasn’t expecting her to come down to the library. He expected her to remain out of sight for the whole day tomorrow as well. Her presence both surprised him and pleased him—in addition to arousing him.

“Thank you,” she said softly, lighting up a small flicker of hope.

What that hope exactly exemplified, Leo could not say. He wasn’t expecting her to fall for him. Just like he was not expected to fall for her. That was, at least, what he was trying to convince himself of. The truth was, of course, much different. She was, and remained, the only woman who got away, sort of. She was the one he was most interested in, but upon finding out which family she belonged to, Leo knew that anything happening between them would be a lost cause.

But the heart wants what it wants. That was how it had always been. That was how it would always remain. Jane always occupied a special place in his heart, the sort of place he couldn’t really explain. He couldn’t say he loved her. He was mesmerized. Occasionally obsessed. And now, absolutely ravenous for her.

His entire body tingled just upon looking at her in that thin robe that was tightened with a rope just around her thin waist where he wanted to grab her most and pull her closer to him, so close that she would never be able to wriggle out of his embrace.

Then, he remembered her bruise. Rage took over, and he forgot all about his mad desire. All that remained was a desperate need to protect her.

As if sensing the storm that was brewing inside of him, she instantly showed him that she wished to have nothing to do with it.

“I think I shall just try to fall back asleep,” she said, deciding against any of the offered books.

“What about your nightmare?” he reminded her.

She bit her lower lip. He couldn’t tell if that was fear or something else. “If it comes to me again, I shall have to bear it this time,” she told him.

As soon as she turned around, he knew that he couldn’t let her go. He rushed after her, and a moment later, found himself one step behind her. He reached out for her and tried to gently grab her by the elbow, wishing to keep her here at least for a few precious moments longer.

“Jane…” he whispered, but her reaction stunned him.

She flinched in the same second when he reached out to her, her entire face taking on an expression of horror, forcing him to withdraw his hand without any hesitation.

“I’m sorry,” he said, offering her one of his most heartfelt apologies. “I have crossed the line. I will never touch you again, Jane…”

Her lips parted as if she wanted to tell him something as her fingers instantly flew to the bruised wrist in an effort to hide it from him. But no concealment was possible. He had seen everything. Without saying another word, she turned around on her heels and left the library. He listened to the sound of her footsteps, and then the entire house was swallowed in silence once more.

“I will never touch you again, Jane,” he whispered again to himself. “… unless you want me to…”