17. Raina

It was Lily. No, Charlie. No…please, not both.

Crawling to consciousness from a deep sleep, Raina squinted first at the grainy monitor on her nightstand—it was Lily crying for attention—and then picked up her phone to check the time.

"Oh, we made it to two-twenty," she murmured, pushing back the comforter. Could a full night's sleep be that far off?

Fighting a groan, she pushed up, rubbing her eyes, centering herself before she leapt up. She'd fallen asleep right after the babies' last feeding, just after ten, and Chase hadn't yet come back from Miami.

Was he home now, she wondered as she padded barefoot into the hall toward the squeaky cries of the child she might always secretly call Thing One.

No, he must still be on the road, since the spare room where he slept was dark and the door still open. He'd driven down this morning to take the meetings with her former clients who'd insisted on giving Wingate Properties their listing.

One of the three consulting jobs she'd given him, this project was the most complicated for a host of reasons. First of all, Emil and Rodrigo Jimenez were not easy clients, but she'd done a dozen contracts with them, and she understood their hot buttons.

The deal itself was dicey, since the building was a multi-residential unit directly on Miami Beach and required a working knowledge of Dade County zoning restrictions. And, finally, the valuation was going to require a selling agent with a backbone of titanium, because Emil would give up his firstborn before he dropped a price. Only Raina knew how to get him to do that.

And with a limited pool of potential buyers, they'd have to…

She shook her head as she walked into the nursery, trying to wipe away the last few thoughts.

Valuation and zoning restrictions? Emil and Rodrigo Jimenez? Did she really want her sleep-deprived brain to go there?

"Not when my darling Lily is trying to wake up her sister," she whispered, leaning over the crib to reach down for the baby. "Hush, my angel baby. No more real estate. Just your mama bear."

She held the tiny body close, planting a kiss on her head, taking a whiff of that sweet baby scent. Whoa, not all that sweet, she thought as she laid the baby on the changing table, whispering and cooing through a diaper change by soft nightlight.

Still barely awake, she dropped right into the rocker and nestled Lily closer, stroking her little forehead as she latched on for her middle-of-the-night snack. But she seemed mighty hungry, and Raina already knew that when—not if—Charlie woke in a bit, she'd have to go downstairs and get a bottle of pumped breast milk.

When that happened two nights ago, Chase had awakened and gone down for her, reminding her for the three billionth time that day that he was pretty much perfect.

Maybe he'd decided to spend the night at his property in Cocoa Beach. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. He said he'd be on the road at the end of the day, after dinner with the Jimenez brothers, putting him here by midnight. He'd also mentioned he might stop by one of the rental properties he owned on the barrier island off the coast of Melbourne.

Deep inside—maybe even not so deep—she hoped he didn't stay in that property but was coming home to her.

Home to her.

Was that how he viewed this unorthodox living arrangement they shared?

And whether he stayed somewhere else overnight or not, why hadn't he called her from the car with a full report on the meeting? He'd texted and said it went well, that he'd ironed out a contract, and would tell her more when he got home.

Home. There was that word again.

The fact was, Chase had an apartment in New York, his grandparents' house in Sicily, and a slew of rental properties all over the country, not to mention the boutique hotel down the road.

Yet he chose to sleep in a spare room at her house, using the bathroom in the hall. Not to mention that he was awakened just about every night by not one but two crying babies.

She almost smiled at the thought and the fact that Lily was definitely not done. Raina lifted her, rubbed her back to elicit that perfect burp, then carefully switched her to the other side, tucking her in for round two as she let her thoughts meander back to Chase.

Right here, in the darkest of the night, with one baby nursing and the other probably minutes from wailing, she had to face facts.

What was really happening here? And how long could they manage it without going to the next, natural step? The last time they'd talked about anything that personal, he'd basically said that he was all in, and Raina just had to say what she wanted and he'd give it to her.

She played that conversation over and over in her mind, seeing him say the words, feeling the touch of his hand, remembering how much she wanted to seal their non-deal with a kiss…but she didn't.

If she kissed him, she knew it was game over. They'd hugged a hundred times. He'd kissed her head, her cheek, her hand, and he'd even kissed her former mother-in-law. But not Raina's lips, not one time.

And they both wanted that kiss so much.

She looked down at Lily, who had fallen asleep halfway through her second course. Grateful she'd already changed her, Raina stood and eased the little body back into her favorite spot in the crib. First, she made sure her tiny feet were tucked into the sleep sack and her little fingers were covered by her cuffs, so she didn't scratch her face in the middle of the night.

She peeked at Charlie, who was deep in dreamland, but probably not for long. Blowing them both kisses, she closed the door without making a sound. Maybe she could steal an hour before—

The sound of a car engine and a flash of lights reflected in the spare room window brought her to a halt. A moment later, the front door opened, and then she heard the soft thud of Chase taking off his shoes so he didn't wake her coming up the stairs.

Yeah, that was what a man did who was home.

She tapped the switch for the hall light to alert him that she was up and about, and they met as he came up the stairs, neither one speaking for a second as they looked at each other.

"Charlie?" he asked on a whisper.

"Lily," she replied just as softly. "But I'd be crazy to go back to sleep now, because you know it's just a matter of time."

For a moment, he didn't answer, but took one slow step closer, and as he reached the soft glow of the lamp she'd just turned on, she could see…something in his eyes. Sadness, regret, worry? Something not good.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" Without thinking, she stepped down to get closer. "Is everything all right, Chase?"

He studied her face, silent, searching, staring and with each passing second, the shadows in his dark eyes deepened with churning emotions she imagined she could read.

"You don't want to be here," she said, too tired and mushy inside to be diplomatic and careful.

His eyes flickered in surprise. "On the contrary, I could have stayed at the rental in Cocoa Beach, but all I did was stop in, take a peek at the new furniture, and notice that the family-owned inn next door put up a gazebo. Then I got back in the car and came here."

"But something's wrong. The Jimenez brothers? Did they tag-team you and try to convince you they knew a guy who knew a guy who had a workaround for that new waterfront zoning issue?"

He almost smiled. Almost. But he seemed too lost in that moment to react at all.

"Chase?"

"I met Jack."

She inhaled sharply, suddenly feeling very off balance. She reached for the handrail and stared at him, the collision of two worlds like a smack on her face, sending her reeling backwards.

He'd met her ex-husband?"Why? How? Did you…What happened?"

He swallowed and let his eyes shutter. "I'll tell you about it tomorrow, Raina. I'm fried."

"Okay, but…" She moved her hand from the handrail to his arm, which was cool, like he'd had it braced on the open window all the way up the state. "Was it…are you…is everything…okay?"

"Raina, I have to go to bed."

She nodded as her heart crept up her chest and took up residence in her throat. Why did he see Jack? What did they say to each other? Were the Jimenez brothers involved? Did Chase go to him or…

"Charlie's crying," he said softly, pulling her from the string of thoughts. "Want me to go down and warm a bottle for her?"

She nearly melted, the offer springing tears of gratitude and something far deeper, something she'd known for a long time but hadn't said.

Because how do you tell a man you love him when you haven't even kissed him?

"I'll get it," she said. "I'll handle it. You…go to bed."

He hesitated as if he were going to call for a different game plan, but then exhaustion and whatever else was working on him—meeting Jack, maybe—won out. With a nod, he walked by her, the scent of the night air lingering as he disappeared into the spare room.

She stood paralyzed for a moment. Should she get the baby? Warm the milk? Follow him and demand to know exactly what happened? Why wouldn't he tell her? Could Jack destroy this relationship, too? Was it possible he'd said or done something that changed how Chase felt?

"What should I do?" she murmured, a sob threatening.

Because, right then, all she wanted was to collapse on the steps and weep. Her worlds had collided, and the impact hurt.

Raina broughtCharlie into her room to feed and change her, because it was the only way to be sure Lily didn't wake again. Propped up against the headboard, she tried not to think too hard about what may have transpired in Miami as Charlie took the bottle with greed and gusto.

"You going into a growth spurt, my love?" she whispered, stroking her sweet, sweet face. "I bet you are."

But she couldn't help herself. She imagined all the things that might have been said, the tension and the accusations from Jack.

What would Chase say to him? Nothing that could or would hurt her, she knew. But she'd never wanted Chase to meet Jack, to know she was dumb enough to marry him or—

"Hey." Chase's voice came with a soft knock on her open door. "You two awake?"

"Yeah." She turned to him. "Why are you up?"

On a deep sigh, he shrugged and stepped into the room. "Can I join the party?"

She smiled and tapped the bottle in Charlie's mouth. "Only an ounce left, and she's just about gone to dreamland, but you're welcome."

Wordlessly, he walked to the French doors that led to the patio and opened them, the ocean breeze wafting in. Salty air—the sweet scent of beach and home—filled the room and made Charlie shudder as she sucked down the last dregs of her bottle, deeply asleep.

He went outside and stood at the railing, silhouetted against the nearly full moon over the ocean. He wore a T-shirt and sleep pants, an outfit she'd seen him in dozens of times. But tonight, it seemed more masculine, more intimate, more…tempting.

After a minute, he turned and came back into the room, settling on one of the two chairs in the sitting area, dropping his head back and closing his eyes.

She waited, knowing he had to speak first.

"Emil Jimenez loves you," he finally said.

She chuckled, thinking of the mustached Cuban man who made her laugh and tried to get her to join his family every year for Noche Buena. "He doesn't love me. Well, he loves my ability to make him a profit, but—"

"No. His eyes light up at the mention of your name."

"Oh, that's—"

"So does his brother, your entire family, most of your other clients, and…yes." He laughed softly. "Even your ex-husband has a visceral response to your name."

"That isn't love," she said dryly. "What's your point?"

He took a deep breath and stood, turning toward the bed to make her realize for the first time that she was in a nightgown, barely under the covers, giving a bottle to a baby.

Talk about vulnerable, Raina Wingate.No suit, no heels, no desk, no negotiating power. Just a man and a baby and an ocean-scented bedroom and a whole lot of questions.

"My point," he said, taking a few steps closer, "is that you are a woman who people notice. People pay attention to Raina Wingate. People…really respect you, adore you, and even fear you."

The words rolled over her like a warm ocean wave, lifting her buoyantly for a moment, then letting her drop a little too fast.

"Oh, that's work people who—"

"No, Raina. No." He came to the side of the bed, perching on the edge. "That's everyone. You know you're the glue that holds the Wingate family together?"

"Pffft. Please. Madeline? Susannah? Rose? Are you kidding? Dad?"

"Rex, yes. But you're the most like him. You're truly the son he didn't have."

She sank into the tufted headboard behind her, not sure anyone had ever paid her such a high compliment. "But…can you tell me about Jack, Chase? What happened? How did you—"

He shook his head. "Details aren't important. Jack got wind that you sent a surrogate to the meeting, and he blew into that Brickell Avenue office and we, uh…" He flicked his brows. "We had a little conversation."

She inhaled sharply. "Do I want to know the details?"

He lifted his chin, turned his handsome face from one side to the other, the soft nightlight next to her bed showing the shadow of his whiskers and the lines of his jaw.

"Look, Ma, no bruises."

"You didn't…" She shook her head. "No, of course you didn't. How did he know who you were?"

"I'm not sure he did at first. Then he must have been given just enough information through various grapevines. That I took you to the hospital and have been helping with the babies and we're…kind of…not a couple, but not not a couple." He winced. "Do I sound like a teenage girl?"

She laughed at that, reaching for his hand without even thinking about it. "Bottom line me, Chase Madison. We gotta get some sleep."

He leaned in, close enough that she got the slightest whiff of musky man and evening air. "Bottom line? You're a special woman, Raina."

She tried to take a breath, but it got caught in her chest.

"I mean it," he said, somehow moving closer. "Very, very special."

Charlie's head turned, the bottle forgotten, as she let out a whimper that teetered on a cry. But she settled with a sigh, back to sleep.

"Let me put her down," Chase said, reaching for her.

"Okay," Raina said. "She can spend the rest of the night in the cradle. She sleeps best there."

The tiny basinet was a few feet from Raina's bed, necessary when she needed both babies close but wanted to stay in her bed.

He took the baby from her arms, all of his attention on the wee body he held. As he stood with her, he pressed his lips to her forehead and whispered something unintelligible, then gently lay her in the cradle.

"Now." He turned to Raina. "Where was I?"

For a few heartbeats, she just stared at him, then inched to the side, lightly patting the bed. "Here, I hope."

He smiled and came back, hesitating and not sitting down this time.

"You can stay with me," Raina said. "We can talk. Until I drool myself to sleep."

He didn't sit, but regarding her intently. "It was a long drive home—"

"Then you should go. Get some sleep and we'll—"

"So much time to think," he continued, talking over her. "About you."

She swallowed and waited for him to continue, tense and expectant, a little scared and breathless.

"I'm certain I've never met a woman—anyone, really—quite like you," he said softly, finally resting on the edge of the bed again. "At first, you were…daunting. A force, a human…presence. Then I realized how enchanting you were, how driven by love for your family, the keeper of their solutions."

She smiled. "I'm a fixer."

"And then I watched you grow—"

"Literally," she joked.

"As a mother," he continued, his voice serious despite her quips, "I watched you navigate this challenge—make them a home, deliver them healthy, rise to the occasion. And during that time, you helped me in my grief, and stood by your sisters, ran a company, took in your former mother-in-law, and…and…captured my whole heart and soul."

She exhaled, unable to do anything but listen.

"And those thoughts just got me to Daytona Beach," he said with a wry smile. "For the next two hours, I had to wonder…what…what would I do if I lost you? What would I do…without you?"

Her heart squeezed as the words hit their mark, and her next breath caught in her throat.

She had no idea how to answer that, none at all. So she did the only thing she could do. Still holding his gaze, she sat up, reached for his face, and drew him closer.

Whispering his name, she brought his lips to hers, the kiss as light as air until…it wasn't. She angled her head, deepened the contact, and let the kiss say what she couldn't. It only lasted a few seconds, maybe ten, but with each heartbeat she was dizzier, happier, lost…and found.

When it ended, he straightened as they both exhaled with a little wonder and bliss.

He touched her lips with his fingertips. "Good night, Rain."

She gave the slightest nod. "G'night, Chase."

He turned the light switch to completely darken the room but for a path of moonlight down the middle. Rounding the bed, he paused for a moment, then sighed as he walked out.

Just before the door latched, she heard him whisper, "I love you, Raina."

She sat in the dark alone for a long, long time, gazing at the moon, reliving the last few moments, and knowing…the truth.

She loved him, too.