Chapter Thirty

Madison

I had my answer.

A second stretched into eternity, widening the gulf between us. Something was torn in my chest. A pain I felt only in my mind but was somehow real all at once.

Against my better judgment, judgment I knew I should have listened to, I’d put myself out there. Exposed myself, raw nerves and all, and I’d been burned.

“I see.”

I took a step, trying to get past him, wondering if I could metaphorically leave him in my past as well. Just move on, leave him here.

Maybe, a part of my brain argued, maybe I was being too harsh on him. Perhaps it was too much to ask for him to have gotten rid of all her clothing.

No. It’s been two years. An item or two, perhaps. Everything right down to her underwear? No. That’s a sign of not having moved on at all.

“Maddie, wait.”

Callum blocked the doorway, preventing me from leaving. I glared at him.

“No. I’m done,” I told him. “I knew all along. I’ve known it right here.” I tapped the side of my head. “But I listened to other parts of me instead and stayed. I stayed here with you, hoping it would be different. Tricking myself into thinking it was different. All the while, I was just being groomed to be a stand-in for her.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“You got me a glani that’s almost a carbon copy of one I saw a picture of her in,” I pointed out.

“What? The indigo?” he sputtered. “That’s because to wear a purple glani of any shade in public means you’re spoken for. Dragon women do this to announce they’re no longer available or seeking attention from unknown men.”

I frowned. “You didn’t tell me that! All I saw was a picture of her on the wall in the same outfit. And that still doesn’t mean you weren’t trying to make me look like her. All you do is compare me to her and how she was.”

“What are you talking about?” he cried.

“I heard you with Baz! I heard how every sentence, everything you said about me, was always brought back to her. You think of me in relation to her.”

“You eavesdropped on us?” Callum was angry now.

“I was standing against the house under the window when you started talking,” I snapped. “I didn’t go looking for it. If you’d wanted the conversation to be private, you should’ve been more careful.”

He shut his mouth.

“I can’t do this, Callum. I can’t. You haven’t moved on. In two years, you’ve made no effort to. You can’t get rid of her things or the memory of her.”

“I loved her!”

“I know!” I shouted back. “I’m not asking you to forget her. Holy crap, I offered to help you solve her murder. I know she was taken from you against your will. But she’s gone , and if you want me to stay, if you want me to be a part of your life, you have to let her go .”

“If you’re a part of my world, then she’s going to be a part of it,” he growled.

“Then maybe I’m better off back where I was instead of being brought here against my will!” I cried. “I know she’s a part of your world. But I won’t be held up against her and be judged, Callum. Because that’s not how you decide if you care for someone or not. If you aren’t ready to move on from her, fine . I won’t force you to because it would never be real. But I’m gone. I’ll go somewhere where I’m valued, like the family I had back home. The one you kidnapped me away from.”

He laughed.

“What the hell is so funny?”

“Listening to you go on about them,” he said callously. “As if they were the greatest. Except they weren’t. You told me about them, Madison. You told me what happened to you. How they shunned you after I didn’t kill you on the battlefield that day. They kept you apart. Trust me, I know what that’s like. When Noa was killed, and I stayed alive. My people gave me the same treatment. You know the difference between us, though?”

“Oh, this ought to be good,” I hissed.

“The difference,” he said, drawing himself up, “is that my family were the only ones who didn’t treat me that way. My family were the ones who kept me close. Who helped me. Your people, the ‘family’ you claim, they loovveddd you just fine. Loved you so much that they didn’t ask for your side of the story, didn’t trust you, they just assumed you were a traitor and shunned you. Shunned you so bad your government offered you up to us without even telling you .”

I glared, unable to find the words to reply.

He laughed. “And my family is the one you accuse of being dysfunctional. Yet they welcomed you in with open arms even though you were human. You need to open your eyes, Madison. Because you’re telling yourself a lie about them.”

“Yeah?” I spat, incensed by his words. “Well, you need to open your eyes and accept that Noa is dead , and she isn’t coming back, no matter how much you wish I was her!”

Callum’s face turned to stone. I knew the instant I said them I’d gone too far.

“Get out,” he said with a coldness I’d never heard before, moving out of my way and pointing at the front door.

“Cal, wait, I—”

“No more words. Just get out.”