12. Family First

12. Family First

Dessin

Skylenna wrinkles her nose asshe starts to wake up.

It’s her tell. It’s that little sign I wake up early to see. That adorable movement that makes my ice-cold heart begin to thaw.

“How is she?” Kane rushes to the front, burning my thoughts with crippling stress and guilt.

“She survived the night.”

We both sigh heavily.

I thought I lost her. The gurgling sound in her chest. It could have meant a lot of things. A broken rib puncturing her lung, causing a collapse. Or the space between her chest wall and lungs filling with blood.

She was kicked, stomped on, scratched, thrown, and beaten as if by a cluster of apes.

My fists clench and shake at the memory. She tried to protect her vital organs, but they came from every angle. That strength couldn’t have been matched. And she was blind to it all.

Last night was hell to live through without a moment of sleep.

I glance over at her again with uncontained anguish swelling in my gut. She stirs in Warrose’s arms, taking shallow gasps, feeble whimpers, and furrowing her brow.

“How will she be able to walk through the prison with you all?” Greystone asks with an uncharacteristic tenderness to his tone.

“She can’t. I won’t let her.”

The lack of sleep and food is causing my system of alters to suffer. The anxiety, panic, and creeping fear are worse than the asylum. Because now we have to keep them all safe. Keep them all fed. Keep them all from dying a gruesome death.

Watching Skylenna touch the brink of death, hearing her scream, and now seeing the aftereffects of her beating made me violently sick. I vomited hot bile in my cage. Heaved until nothing could come up. My thoughts raced on building the escape plan. But I’ve been so distracted, so tired, so hungry.

I’m at a breaking point.

We need food.

“What happens when the cages open?” Warrose asks me.

I don’t take my eyes off my girl. “I’m staying here with her.”

“We all will,” Ruth adds, looking almost as tired as I am.

I can’t deny her this. Any of them. They love her, too.

I nod once.

“I can see if there are any supplies to clean her up. Maybe take away the pain,” Niles offers with wide, naïve eyes coloring with desperation to be useful here. Even though it’s not a bad idea, I can’t let him go out there on his own.

“I’ll go with him,” Marilynn says reluctantly.

I study her. The bags under her deep blue eyes, the dryness of her freckled skin, the way she holds her stomach to fight the hunger pains.

“Fine,” I grumble.

“Try and find alcohol so we can disinfect these wounds. Bandaging, capsaicinwhich is found in chili peppers for the painwater to get her hydrated, and fuck, if you can find a blanketshe’s still so cold.” Warrose adjusts her in his arms.

I have to remember to thank him for this with my life. He stepped up for her last night. I wanted it to be my cage that opened, obviously, but I was just happy she made it back. That someone was able to take care of her.

“We’ll find Helga Bee. That one prisoner had his hand chopped off. They were disinfecting it with alcohol, remember? I bet she knows where we can find medical aid.” Niles paces his cage, waiting for those bars to open.

I’m itching to be let out, too. The second these cages open, I’m running to her. My chest feels broken, cracked open like an egg, my heart gushing out of me.

“Maybe I can ask Kaspias for some food for her? Just this once,” Ruth suggests hesitantly.

The last string of patience I had snaps loud enough to ring in my ears.

“Do you have fucking brain damage? He’s the one who did this to her! He’s the one who is relishing in making us suffer. Look at her face!” I’m standing now, gripping the bars with every ounce of strength I have left.

Ruth drops her wide eyes to Skylenna. We both scan the blackening bruises on her face, the forming scabs, the drying blood, the swelling forming in stiff lumps. It makes me want to obliterate all of humanity.

“That’s what he did! You need to drop this fantasy of that man being a hidden saint. He’s not one of us, Ruth! He’s not my brother!” My voice echoes through the halls of this prison wing. It booms across the brimstone floors, waking every last prisoner who was still asleep.

A rumbling of groans and voices bounce back to us.

“Back off, Dess!” Warrose growls. “Just because her instincts aren’t the same as yours doesn’t mean she’s wrong.”

I glare at him through lowered lids.

“Don’t give me that look. We’re going through hell together, alright? Doesn’t give you a pass to take this on alone. To be a dick and shut us out.”

My fury rises to the surface. He thinks he knows what’s going on in our head? He thinks me being a dick is what matters right now?

“The woman I love is lying bloody and broken in your arms! You really want to pull this card right now?!” Blood rushes to my face. Heat prickles under my skin.

“Yeah. I do. Because I had to watch you lying bloody and broken in her arms!” Warrose’s voice breaks at the word her. “I had to watch her go up in flames, beg you to come back, kiss your lifeless body, and ask someone to save you!”

It’s as if he’s swinging that sickle through my chest all over again.

“And I couldn’t say a goddamn thing to comfort her! I couldn’t tell her I was going to try to bring you back to life. I couldn’t tell her this was all a part of a grand plan. I made a promise to my best friend. My brother. It was literally your dying fucking wish.” He fights to gain control of his tone, his hoarseness. But the tears come anyway. Those hazel eyes well with pent-up grief, and he tries to blink it away.

“I had to look at your corpse and attempt to give you that crazy ass spring water, which had a pretty good chance of not working. And then at your funeral? Seeing your casket? She lost it, Dess. She fucking shattered into a million tiny pieces. And all I could do was watch.”

That thick wall of ice starts to melt.

“I love her, too, brother. So, no. You don’t get to be a bastard to us. Because I love her, too!” Tears drizzle down his cheeks. And I have to break the burning eye contact. I can’t stand to see him cry. It was only a few times in my life that it happened.

“You’re right.” I take a deep breath, reeling in my temper. “I’m sorry.”

He grinds his teeth. “And?”

My gaze meets Ruth, who is rubbing her hands over the backs of her arms.

I sigh. “I’m sorry, Ruth. You were just trying to help.”

Ruth flashes me a sad smile, gulping down her discomfort from the weight of my stare. She doesn’t deserve my outbursts, I know. But I’m teetering on the edge of a full-on outrage, a disastrous breakdown. And with this amount of stress, there might be another alter who splits.

“I’m so thirsty,” Skylenna finally says, trying to peek up at Warrose through swollen eyelids.

My heart beat picks up, kicking a hole through my breastbone at the sound of her voice.

“We’re getting water for you just as soon as”

“Dessin?” she utters, that sweet voice sounding like she tried to gargle glass.

“Yes, baby?” I practically collapse.

“Your cage…” She tries to open her eyes wider, looking past me. “The bars…”

At this, the entire group shifts awkwardly, looking at my confinement with the same question they’ve all been dying to ask.

“It’s sturdier than I thought,” I answer.

She pauses. “Show me your hands.”

I release a low grumble in the base of my throat, flexing my fingers as I hold my palms out to her.

The group sucks in a sharp breath. I’d love it if they had the decency to pretend to be busy. But here we are, way too involved in each other’s private moments.

Skylenna frowns at the plum purple bruising on the inside of my hands. But I don’t care. I would have broken my bones to break through that metal.

“I love you,”she mouths to me.

The cage doors swing open.

“Go now!” I urge Niles and Marilynn. “Beat the crowd.”

They nod eagerly, racing down the hallway without another word. And I bolt right after them, turning on my heels to join Skylenna in Warrose’s cage. I get down on my knees in front of them, holding my arms out.

“I’ve got her,” I tell Warrose. “Thank you for taking care of her.”

He gives me a tight nod, passing her over to me as if she only weighs the same as a puppy. My chest collapses on itself as I smell the coppery, dried blood covering her body. Feel the iciness of her skin. She’s so fucking fragile it kills me.

And to twist the knife in my heart, she smiles despite the swelling in her jaw. She coos at the sight of me. I could cry like a newborn baby at that smile.

Warrose stands up, naked, and in my face. Thankfully, Ruth hands him his pants.

“Why?” I ask Skylenna.

“Hmm?”

“Why did you do it?” I kiss the bruises on her collarbone. Kiss the wounds on her cheekbones. “Why did you freak out, baby? Why did you kill that sentinel? I had it handled.”

She shakes her head, frowning like it’s too painful to say.

“I’m not mad, Skylenna. I swear, I just want to understand.”

“The blood was everywhere,” she croaks.

Ruth takes a seat next to Warrose, stroking Skylenna’s sliced up feet.

“On my chest? Look, see? I’m fine now. They barely got me.”

“It was spilling on my lap. It covered my hands.” She holds her arms up to show me, fingers shaking at the effort. “It gushed over your chin as you tried to breathe.” Her small voice breaks, and hot tears leak over her swollen lids, streaming through the dried blood.

I suddenly wish I could reverse time, taking back my stupid fucking question. Taking back my faked death. Taking back her grief.

“Oh…” is all I can manage.

“And you stopped blinking. You stopped breathing.” Her cries turn hysterical. She chokes on snot and hiccups. “Oh, god, Dessin! I saw it happen again! I was there! You were—dying in my arms!”

Ruth reaches out to hold Skylenna’s hand, holding back her tears.

“Shhh, fuck, I’m so sorry. It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. I should have realized—”

“I begged you to come back, and—DaiSzek, he cried for you—and you were—so cold!”

The urge to cry with her builds like lava in my throat. Her entire body trembles in my lap, and I can feel the devastation fall from her in waves.

“I’m an idiot, baby. Look what I’ve done to you.” I panic, breathing erratically as I watch her drown. She’s like this because of me. I gave her irreversible scars. Wounds that can never be healed. That was the price we both paid.

And Kane’s guilt rising to the front is more than overwhelming, it’s cataclysmic.

“He’s safe,” Ruth says, grabbing Skylenna’s hand and plastering it to my bare chest. “You feel that? That’s Dessin’s heartbeat. He’s safe. He’s alive.”

I fail to stifle my shock as I watch Ruth.

“Say it, Skylenna. He’s safe with you.”

And just like that, Skylenna’s breathing slows, and she blinks away her tears with determination pinching her brow.

“He’s safe with me.”

Ruth smiles. “That’s right. You’re both safe.”

Skylenna leans her ear against my chest to listen to the steady rhythm. Sniffling, fighting to control her sobs.

I reach my hand out to grab Ruth’s thin fingers. I don’t think I’ve ever held her hand before, but it feels right. “Thank you,” I mouth.

I’m ashamed for snapping at her. Especially when her heart is this big. She didn’t need to come on this mission with us. She’s lived a sheltered life, never experiencing true terror like this prison presents. But she’s here. And she just made my girl feel better.

“You’re welcome,” Ruth whispers.

I rock Skylenna back and forth, savoring the way she clings to me. That even though she’s this powerful creature now, I’m still her rock. Nothing in the world is a better feeling than that.

“Dess? We’ll give you two some time alone. Ruth and I will get a shower and bring back some towels.”

I can hardly nod my head. It feels so damn good to hold her, to finally relax in this hell hole. But I’m grateful for the time alone. For the moments of peace with just the two of us.

“I’m sorry, Dessin. I fucked up,” Skylenna whimpers in my shoulder.

“No, you didn’t.” I kiss her hair several times. “Nothing matters now. It’s just you and me.”

“I missed you.”

My cock throbs against her bare ass in my lap. I groan at the bad timing, but I love her so much. Hearing her say these things just undoes every bit of restraint I have.

“It was agony not being able to hold you last night.”

She nods. “I know.”

“So, Warrose didn’t get a hard-on last night, did he?” Say no.

She laughs against my chest, then winces as the pain shoots through her ribs.

“Of course not.”

The fact that I shouldn’t make her laugh is its own kind of torture.

“I guess that’s good.”

“Jealous?”

“I was too fucking out of my mind scared for you to be jealous.” I breathe in the scent of her hair, closing my eyes as that slight whiff of lily and rainwater make it into my senses. “But also, yeah. Kinda.”

She groans. “Don’t make me laugh.”

“I’m sorry.”

My breathing grows heavy as I finally can relax enough to drift close to sleep for the first time since being in this place. Our bodies meld around each other. And I let her soak in every last drop of heat I can give.

“He gave his body to keep me warm,” she comments.

“He did.”

“But no one on this earth is as warm as you. You’re my blanket in a blizzard.”

Male pride fills my chest. “That right there makes the entire night without you worth it.”

“Will you be here when I wake up?” she asks sleepily.

The truth of the answer bites into my heart like an apple.

“As long as you promise to wake up.”

~

Niles

“This place smells like anactual asshole,” I whisper to Marilynn as we jog into the stadium area.

“I’m inclined to agree with you.” She cringes inwardly.

We spot Helga Bee and Gerta at the same time, waving them down.

“Hey there, golden pup!” Helga Bee greets, losing her breath from doing squats, jumping, and throwing punches in the air.

“Is that my new nickname?” I grimace as Gerta leans her damp arm against me, batting her eyelashes, and stinging my burns with salty sweat.

“Sure is. You’re cute and cuddly, like a golden puppy! Gerta says so.”

Gerta nods.

“We actually don’t have time to chat,” Marilynn says grumpily, stepping forward and reaching a hand to loosen Gerta’s grip on my arm. “That hurts him. But you can hold his hand.”

Gerta blinks her surprise, then blushes while she grabs my left hand.

I ogle at Marilynn in wide-eyed disbelief. She generally looks too pissy to be this observant. Yet she knew Gerta was hurting my burns.

“Skylenna was hurt badly in The Hunt. Where can we find supplies?” I ask.

“Where is she?” Helga Bee stops her exercising to look around.

“Not here. We had to keep her in our cages.” And it killed me to leave them. But she needs help.

“You’re supposed to bring your wounded here, ya know. That’s probably gonna cost you tonight, dumb pup!”

“What do you mean?”

Helga Bee uses her skimpy uniform to wipe the sweat dripping down her splotchy brow. Then attempts to dab the rest of her skin dry.

“It’s Fun House Night!” She wafts her hands around the giant room. “I told you all about Fun House Night!”

Fuck us right up the ass.

“Oh, shit.”

“Yep. ’Tis a real doozy! We’re all going to be entertaining those dick-jerking, bloodthirsty, mommy-killin’ sissies!”

“But Skylenna should be exempt, right? She was nearly beaten to death last night,” Marilynn grits.

“Nope. Even those who have lost a limb still have to join the festivities.”

I kick the side of the stage. “Fuck this. Can you help us get supplies then?”

She fake coughs, pointing her thumb behind the stage. “Take what you need, grumpy puppy. The next wave of prisoners will flood through those doors in about a minute. You can slip back to the cages that way.”

~

Ruth

I hate to say it,but I feel remarkably safer with Warrose guiding us to the showers.

“There are buckets in the corner. I’ll grab that if you can grab a few towels,” Warrose whispers, his facial hair grazing the side of my ear. I hide my shudder by scratching my nose with the back of my hand.

We strip off our clothes without looking at each other and rush into the blazing cold water. He walks us into a corner, where no one can watch me scrub down. I don’t object because, honestly, I’m not in the mood to see another little man beating his thing off to me in front of everyone. I just want to help Skylenna.

“You about done?” he asks with his back to me.

“Yes.” I finish rinsing out the suds from my hair.

We quickly disperse to dry off and get what we came for. After slipping on another uniform, I grab an armful of towels. Warrose signals me over, but something down the hall, toward the prison commissary, grabs my attention.

Kaspias leans against a wall, hands casually hooked in his pant pockets, looking out at the inmates eating.

Maybe I am delusional. Maybe Dessin is right. I’m naïve and ignorant.

I offer Warrose an apologetic look before dashing down the hall, arms holding the stack of towels, chin up, and jaw set.

Kaspias meets my eyes as I race down the hall, raising an eyebrow.

“Hi,” I pant, clutching the towels to my chest like they might protect me.

“Hello.”

Up close, Kaspias is identical to Dessin. Same height, sharp jawline, same close-set brown eyes. But the differences make him another creature entirely. His lip and ears are pierced with spiked silver jewelry. Those frigid eyes are lined with black paint, and he has a well-kept beard.

I’m suddenly at a loss for words. Unable to remember why I approached him.

“Is that all?” he asks with grating annoyance.

I shake my head. Gulp. Study the charcoal plated armor on his shoulders.

Focus. Skylenna is hurt. You can do this, Ruth. You can be helpful.

“You can gawk at me from a distance. Get the fuck out of my face before I drown you at the Fun House tonight,” he barks.

There’s a Fun House tonight?

“Kaspias,” I breathe, blinking the panic away from my thoughts. “I need your help.”

This washes the aggravation from his features immediately. Something like hilarity hooks the corner of his mouth and twinkles in those empty eyes.

“Go on…” His head turns to the side, the same way Dessin’s does when he’s about to play a game.

“Skylenna…she’s hurt badly. And the kitchen staff is starving us out. I-I just need a small amount of food for her. Anything to help her get some strength back.”

The dark intensity of Kaspias’s stare burns a hole through my skull. I suddenly want to run away, break the connection that makes me feel empty, lost, hopeless.

“And what makes you think I want her to regain even an ounce of strength back? I’m the one who put her in that condition.”

“But—”

“Would you like to suffer the same fate, Ruth?”

“If it gets you to fulfill my request, yes,” I answer without a moment to think about it. I’d probably drop dead. I wouldn’t be able to use the special gifts that Skylenna has. I would be beaten to a lifeless pulp. “Yes,” I say again.

Kaspias narrows his eyes. “Yes?”

I nod. Warrose may kill me first. This is beyond idiotic.

“You would likely not even make it ten yards before my mammoths crushed you,” he muses without breaking eye contact.

“She needs food. Not much. And something for the pain and swelling.”

“Why?”

“Because she’s been in and out of hypothermic levels all night. She hasn’t had a meal in three days. If she’s going to last another day, she needs help.”

“No, I mean, why would you sacrifice your own life so that she may have a bite of food?”

I glare at him as if the answer is obvious. “That’s what family does.”

Kaspias blinks but doesn’t say anything.

“Dessin is your family. You weren’t raised together. And you’ve both been victims of cruel, heartless governments. But he’s your brother, Kaspias. And this is the woman he loves.” My eyes well with tears, and my throat aches to cry.

His eyebrows pull together with a look that almost edges close to sympathy. But after a second, he grins and breaks out into laughter.

“Look at this!” He swipes his thumbs over my eyes. I squeeze them shut against his calloused skin, jerking away from his hands gripping my head. “Tears? Have you really gotten this attached? You think the words family or brother mean anything to me?” He laughs harder, tasting my tears from the pads of his thumbs.

“Ruth,” Warrose calls from a few paces back.

I hold my hand up for him to stay put.

“If you want Skylenna to survive a Fun House Night, if you want to keep your head from being chopped off by the Mazonist Brothers, then you’ll make sure she survives this!”

His smile falls away. “My brother would never let her die.”

“Maybe not. But he certainly would die trying to keep her alive. Then you have one of their bodies on your hands before they can be of any use to this country.”

I feel Warrose’s heavy presence at my back. But I don’t break my furious gaze from Kaspias. From his unfeeling expression.

He gives me a once-over look, then cracks his neck. “Wait here.”

I turn to Warrose after Kaspias heads into the kitchen. He looks down at me with confusion, waiting for an explanation.

“Dessin was right,” I say with a shrug. “He doesn’t care about any of us, but he does care about himself. And he would be in trouble if Skylenna doesn’t survive tonight.”

Without a word, Warrose pulls me against his chest, wrapping his arms around my exposed body. He’s so warm. So strong. I fight the urge to melt into him.

“That was clever, kid.”

“You’re not mad?”

“I definitely was at first, but the fact that you proved Dessin wrong feels like Christmas Day,” he rasps against my hair.

I smile.

~

Skylenna

My arm screams in painas if I’m being skinned alive.

“Hold her still.”

“She’s so wiggly.”

“It’s okay, Skylenna. We’re just cleaning your wounds,” Marilynn grumbles near me.

I squint through the watery blur coating my eyes. Two heads hover around me, moving, bickering, and messing with my limbs.

“Ow!” I hiss, trying to yank my feet away from a glowing golden head.

“They’re trying to keep your wounds from getting infected, baby.” I’m still snuggled in Dessin’s arms. Held tight against his chest.

The sting subsides, replaced by cold water cleaning my skin.

My vision clears, and I look right at Niles wrapping up my feet.

“Nurse Niles at your service!” He grins, placing a kiss on top of my foot. “See? Boo-boo all better.”

I roll my eyes, smiling against the swelling in my cheeks.

“Drink this,” Marilynn says, passing a cup of water to Dessin. He holds it to my lips, tipping it upward for me to drink.

The sensation running down my throat is a blast of endorphins tingling through my bloodstream. Cold water soothing my dry mouth, my tight esophagus. I moan at the relief.

“You think that’s erotic? Just wait until I rub this pain-relieving ointment on you!” Niles chirps, waving a jar of brown cream in my face.

“Niles,” Dessin grunts.

I tap Dessin’s arm. “Deal with it,” I mutter into my cup. “I need his quirkiness right now.”

He sighs, nuzzling his nose in my hair.

“You heard her, Muscles. Only one of us is endlessly hilarious, and it’s certainly not—you!” Niles taps Dessin on the nose with his index finger, making a boop sound. Then instantly retreating like Dessin may try to bite it off.

“Skylenna,” Dessin warns.

But I just laugh, cringing at the way my ribs light up in a lightning storm of pain.

“I’m sorry, Sissy. This ointment only helps with open wounds. Not so much fractured bones.”

I sigh. “It’s okay.”

“I may have something that can help.” Ruth and Warrose stand in the entryway of this cage, holding a tray, towels, and a bucket of water.

“No way,” Marilynn says under her breath.

“It’s soup. Smells terrible. But it’s better than nothing. And there’s this drink that the soldiers take when they’re severely wounded. It remedies that pain during recovery so they can continue fighting.” Ruth kneels down in front of me. “Do you want to eat first or drink the cup of black goo?”

I look down at the bowl of steaming broth and a metal cup filled to the brim with black liquid.

“How did you get this?” Dessin asks.

“Kaspias,” Ruth and Warrose say in unison.

Dessin stiffens beneath me.

“He didn’t want to help. But I made him understand that his life would be on the line if anything happened to either of you at tonight’s Fun House,” Ruth explains as she stirs the bowl of soup.

“What’s the catch?” I try to sit up, but my body groans like an old ship about to sink.

“You have to participate in tonight’s Fun House.”

“Fuck no.” Dessin holds me closer.

“We don’t have a choice,” Niles adds. “Everyone goes in. Even the injured.”

The group falls silent as we all watch the old spoon spin through the steaming soup. The aroma isn’t great, but it makes my stomach grumble just the same.

“Here.” Warrose covers me in towels from the shower area, distributing them over my nakedness. “How’s her temperature?”

“Better,” Dessin says.

“She looks a little better now that you two have cleaned her up a bit.” Warrose studies me like a doctor would a patient. “Any more broken bones?”

Dessin shakes his head. “Just a dislocated shoulder. But I popped it back into place while she was sleeping.”

“Eat,” Ruth urges, holding the spoon out to me.

Eat? When the rest of my family is still being starved out? Just because I was beaten doesn’t make me any more deserving than them.

I shake my head.

“Are you nauseous?” Marilynn asks.

“No.”

“Skylenna,” Dessin grumbles, trying to get a better look at my face. He knows me well enough to find the answers written there.

“I won’t eat unless you all do, too.”

They hesitate before arguing with that logic.

“I’ll take a bite, after each of you do first.” My word is final, and they can hear it in my tone. Either we all eat, or I suffer right along with them.

Ruth takes the first spoonful before passing it to Niles.

“Damn, how can something taste so good and so rancid at the same time?” He rubs his tummy like that one spoonful was enough to fill him up.

One by one, we finish off the bowl of soup. Ruth has me drink the black sludge, helping me force it down without puking. Niles finishes applying the ointment. Marilynn washes the blood out of my hair. And Warrose sings to me as Dessin rocks me back and forth.

I smile up at them as the pain drifts far below the surface. Muted. Colorless. And I realize, it doesn’t matter where we are. An asylum. Demechnef Headquarters. A savage prison.

We are home if we’re together.