Chapter 19

19

E nvy leaned back at his desk, fingers steepled and pressed against his lips as he looked at the woman asleep in the chair by his fire. Apparently, all he had to do to get through to her was give her one good orgasm and she was as good as his.

Which made him feel... a little dirty.

Maybe manipulative.

She was too innocent for this place and he already felt terrible that he'd used her in a way that made her feel like he was a god when all he'd done was finger her. She should fight him at least a little. After all, she had given him every ounce of herself and he remained clothed. He hadn't even reacted that much, at least that she was aware of.

Envy didn't want her to fold to him because she wanted to chase the interest of her own body a little more. He wanted her to want him because he was... him. But that wasn't even the right way to think, because he hated himself. He'd always hated himself.

So he didn't want her to like him because of who he was. He wanted her to like him because she liked him. Not for what he could do or what he did. But just because she did.

These thoughts were almost too jumbled for him to follow, let alone anyone else.

Instead, he distracted himself by looking at the beauty who had curled up in his chair. It was the first time she'd sought him out in his office. He'd been surprised to see her walk through the portal. After all, she'd avoided doing so for weeks now that she'd been with him. Most of the time she wanted to stay in her own room, or draw. And he understood that she was bored, so he had given her the chance to come here.

To talk to him. Even though he hated talking to anyone other than her, it seemed.

When she'd walked through the door, he hadn't been all that certain what to do. He had almost started a conversation, but then he saw the dark shadows under her eyes and the way she walked, a little hesitant. As though she wasn't sure what she was doing here, either.

He'd pointed to the chair by the fire. "You look like you could use some rest," he'd said.

And then she dropped into the chair like he had given her permission to sleep and tumbled into the dreaming world. A faint mist rose off her skin again, and he knew that soon enough she would need to go back out and wreck her body again with more prophecies. It had taken her this entire week to act more like herself, but he had watched that mist slowly get more out of control again.

Her power ate her from the inside out, and now he could see the need for that herb. Her bright hair had lost its luster already, and he could see how she'd lost weight. Shadows rested in-between her ribs, even through the material of her dress.

If he let her continue on like this much longer, she would shatter like a thin piece of glass. He had to protect her, and that meant he had to figure out what to do with the herb now that they had it.

Wings fluttered through the balcony. Silent as an owl, Orphe landed on her stand and stared at the woman in his room before turning her attention to him. "The herb needs to be boiled for seventeen hours exactly, under a full moon. Stir counter clockwise eight times at completion, and then add in the dust of a dead man's bones. The younger the better for the bones, apparently."

"Good work. Do I want to know how you got that information?"

She shifted her wings in a movement that was almost like a shrug. "He kept the notes in his things. If he comes back to a room in shambles, that's not my problem anymore."

So she'd ransacked the circus master's room. That was one way to get the information they needed, although it was highly unusual. The circus master would know that they were looking for the information now, but he would have no way of knowing, considering he was on a journey.

"Getting it under the full moon will be difficult, I imagine, but not impossible." He pressed his steepled fingers to his lips once more. "I haven't been to the surface in quite some time."

"The shadows still control everything." Orphe's feathers fluffed in discomfort. "I looked. They allowed me to pass because I used to be a spirit, but anyone else... Even you, my lord. I believe it would be difficult for you to go above."

He doubted that. But then again, he wasn't sure how long the tea was even good for. "How long do I have for her to drink it after I've finished?"

"Mere moments."

"Damn." His hands dropped onto the arms of his chair, and he felt frustration building. "So I'll need to go to another kingdom, then."

"Most likely."

"How did the circus master have tea for her so readily? It seems unlikely that he'd gone to the surface."

"There was a preservation ritual as well." At his angry glance, Orphe shrugged. "It was a very long ritual and had many parts of it that we have no way of getting. Unless you want to raid Greed's stores, then you will not be able to perform it. It also seemed like it wasn't meant to be cast often."

"Damn again." This was getting trickier and trickier to keep this woman. Sighing, he pinched his nose and tried to keep a headache from barging through his skull. "So the only option is to perform the ritual and have her drink it. How often?"

"Monthly in the beginning should be fine. So long as you are comfortable with her still telling prophecies. I assumed you would wish her to continue."

He did. But that only complicated things as well.

He would have to go to another kingdom with her, and that gave her the opportunity to run. He supposed he could take her to Lust's kingdom, that one was the easiest. And it was beautiful this time of year. Perhaps she would like to see the cherry blossoms in full bloom, and he could take a few days with her away from all this.

Anger burned through him at the mere thought. He didn't want her to fall in love with another kingdom. He couldn't make this kingdom anything like Lust's, and that was a problem.

Envy's kingdom had to be underground. The entirety of the surface was too dangerous for anyone but him or the other spirits that had taken flesh. Even then, he risked damaging this body that he had to take care of. The creatures up there would suck a soul out of a body very quickly. He just didn't have a soul to give.

Lust's kingdom was soft in comparison. Everything there was soft. From the blossoming trees that never stopped raining petals on everything to the snowy peaks of the mountains that surrounded it. It was a beautiful kingdom, and it made Envy's look... weak. Lacking.

He couldn't stand to see her eyes squint in disappointment when she returned here to see just how little he had to offer her.

She'd already been born in Pride's kingdom. And they all knew how wondrous that place was.

Sighing, he figured that it was inevitable. He'd take her to Sloth's kingdom. At least it wasn't nearly as dangerous as Greed's, but it was still a desert kingdom. She wouldn't want to stay there, no matter how much she wanted to get away from him. That was the only thing he could think to do.

"This will be more difficult than I imagined," he murmured before shaking his head. "A difficult pet to keep, indeed."

"You should have killed her when you had the chance."

"Yes, I should have." He looked at Orphe, trying to instill in his gaze just how important it was that she listen. "But now I would snap the neck of anything that hurts her in the slightest. Do you hear me?"

"I have no interest in hurting the girl." Orphe shifted, though, moving her feet back and forth on her post. "I just think you need to be aware that there are others who would like to do so."

"There will always be creatures who want to kill oracles."

"Her words have angered many."

He was certain of it. She saw the future and then said it with such conviction that others believed her. Without hesitation or thought. They just knew that her words were on the right path.

"I suspect hearing the truth of the future is difficult for many," he quietly replied.

"It is more than that. Her words spin a future that might not necessarily have happened otherwise." Orphe squawked, a little too loud. "You must both be careful when you are walking the streets and changing the future."

"She sees a future that is set in stone."

A movement beside the fire caught his attention before Lilith's voice interrupted them. "No, I don't."

His heart stopped in his chest at the sound of her voice before her words registered. "What do you mean, little one?"

She stood, all lithe in body and graceful in every movement. The firelight illuminated her clothing, turning it nearly transparent. Her white gown revealed the long lines of her legs and lean strength in her body as she came to stand before him.

"I tell them one of their futures." She held up her arm, spreading the fingers of her other hand behind it like branches. "There are many endings. Some of them I kill off by telling them the future I have chosen for them. It is the path that leads them to the longest life. And that is the path I always choose to tell them about."

He frowned. "What if they do terrible things in that life?"

"That is not for me to decide. I tell them how to live, and how to live for a long time." Her eyes were haunted as she said the words, though. "What they do with that life is not up for me to decide."

"It feels like maybe it should be."

She shook her head. "Other oracles do that. They play puppet with the world. They make wise men bend a knee and kings weep with the truth of their words. They manipulate entire kingdoms if they wish and they do it all because they know what may or may not happen. I am not that person. I have never wanted to be that person."

"And if I wished for you to be that person?"

Her gaze met his, and the fire behind her burned in her gaze. "I am no one's puppet. The futures I see, and the ones I choose to tell people, are the ones that will allow them to live. I am not responsible for what they do with their life. I will guide them if they wish, but my place in this world is not to tell others how to live. It is only to ensure that they do."

What marvelous words from a woman who was too afraid to take her own power into her hands. He could see how vehement she was about this, though, and some voice in him whispered to listen to her.

He could force her to become like the other oracles. She was susceptible to it. All he would have to do was curl his fingers inside her body a little harder next time, and perhaps she would fall into his palm and do whatever it was that he wanted.

It was rather charming to know that she encouraged people to live. That she still saw the hope in those people and the value in their lives if they kept walking forward.

He didn't see that value. Not in the slightest. Humans were replaceable in that they would always reproduce. He had countless humans at his disposal. Even though he'd killed quite a few of them. It didn't matter what he did with them, because there were still so many people in his kingdom. Many of them still did his bidding, no matter what he did to the others.

Perhaps he should listen to this woman.

Sighing, he nodded and gestured for her to go back to her chair. "That is fine. It is your power, and you should choose what to do with it."

Both females in his room looked at him with shocked expressions. At least, he thought Orphe was looking at him in shock. It was rather hard to guess, considering she was a raven.

Lilith gave him a tiny nod and then staggered away, sinking into the cushions and staring into the flames with a blank expression that made him wonder how long she'd been awake.

"There is one other matter," Orphe said, her croaking voice echoing in the silence. "It appears the circus master never left the kingdom to find the herb."

"He what?" Envy snarled, his gaze whipping to look at the beast in his room. "You are certain?"

"Positive. He chased me out of his room with a broom while I was looking for the correct recipe." Even his little spirit looked troubled by it. "He has been... talking about you."

Now that piqued his anger even more than the knowledge the man hadn't done what he was ordered to do. "How so?"

"He tells the story of how you let him go. And that you were weak to allow him to leave. Many believe now that you are frightened of him, and the power that he controls in the circus he has built." Orphe ruffled her feathers again. "I would have ignored the rumors, but it seems some people believe him. And they are very willing to join his cause in the hopes that many of them gathered together might defeat you."

It was a stupid thought. There had only been a few other times in the history of this kingdom where many had banded together to fight him. They had failed then. They would fail now.

It didn't anger him any less. They thought they could rise against him? For what? To stop him from stealing their magic?

Nothing would stop him from taking all of their powers. He would destroy them all, one by one. Until they were all crushed beneath his heel.

Grinding his teeth, he gritted out, "Then we will take care of them when it is time. Gather more information about them and prepare yourself, Orphe."

"Do I get their eyes?"

"Yes," he replied with no small amount of bitter satisfaction. "You can have their eyes."