Chapter 17

ChapterSeventeen

Her dreams were filled with touches and soft gasps. The sound of masculine growls and the feeling of silk sheets sliding up her legs, tangling between them so she could finally find some sense of relief.

But that was not reality. Not in the real world where she knew to caution herself. Even in her dreams, she had fought back against the sensations, knowing that if she didn’t stop them that she could never come back from this moment. She’d be his, and she wasn’t meant to be anyone’s but her own.

The dawn woke her. The soft beams of sunlight shifted through the gauzy fabric covering the balcony door. They drifted in the breeze, and she watched them for long moments from underneath heavy lids.

Selene felt as though she hadn’t gotten a lick of sleep. She needed another three hours to feel more like herself, and she’d need her wits about her today. Lust’s brother would arrive soon and she needed to stay hidden away. Or maybe she needed to impress him. She hadn’t, really...

A warm, thick arm tightened around her waist for a moment before it relaxed again.

She forced herself to remain still, just in case her movement had nearly woken him. But the heaviness of his arm stayed very still again. Almost too still.

Selene suddenly realized how tangled they were together. His arm was around her waist, one thick thigh wedged between her own. His breath was heavy against her neck, slow and deep as it could only be in sleep.

He was wrapped around her like a second skin, and she didn’t know when that had happened.

Last night, she’d wanted to turn around and let him have his way with her. She’d wanted to feel his lips against her skin, to know what it would feel like to ride that impressive hardness that he had made no move to hide in the slightest.

He’d wanted her. That much was very clear. But she also knew that he wanted everyone and everything he could get his hands on. He was a spirit of lust! As much as she disliked his favorite bedmate, the woman Lara had a point.

Selene was trying to change something that had been around for ages. He was a spirit who couldn’t change, or at least, she didn’t think he could. The price he’d wanted for the answer to her question was a little more than she was willing to give. But in the moment, with those broad, thick hands delving closer and closer to where he’d find her soaking wet...

She felt herself grow slick against his thigh, even at the thought. And damn it, he was pressed against her clit so firmly all it would take was a few wiggles and she’d probably explode against him. That’s all it would take, and that was embarrassing enough.

This man was dangerous. Not just for herself, but for the entire kingdom. She had to remember that. She had to...

He made a soft sound in his sleep and then moved to disentangle himself from her. His thigh shifted first, dragging against her until she had to muffle the sound that came out of her mouth. Then his arm, his palm and fingers sliding over her nipples. Was he awake?

But she looked over her shoulder and saw he was still deeply asleep. His eyes were shut, his blonde hair stuck to his horns in a bird’s nest of tangles that made her want to pick them all apart. And his bare chest moved with deep, slow inhalations. Rising and falling.

Even the sun played on that golden skin. The rays touched him all over, as though the element couldn’t resist itself, and she hated that.

How was she jealous of the sun?

In sleep, his features were much less harsh. She could see how people would find him attractive, even more so than just the legendary Lust who ruled this kingdom. But there were laugh lines around his eyes and mouth, the marks of a man who had found much happiness. His high cheekbones and full lips were vaguely feminine, but his strong jaw made them somehow even more masculine. At least through her eyes. Perhaps if she were a man, she would see it the opposite way.

He was a creature made to tempt. That was certain.

But in this light, he also looked less intimidating. All that tangled hair hanging off his horns, the slackness to his jaw that suggested he might snore on some nights. It was endearing.

Oh, she hated to even think like this. She hated how her hands itched to brush that hair off his forehead.

But why shouldn’t she?

This game they played was dangerous for the both of them. She’d seen the way his face had twisted as he moved his hands over her body, trying desperately not to touch what she’d said was off limits. Almost as though it was physically painful for him to rein himself in.

He’d done it. She was certain that a demon like him wouldn’t be able to keep his hands to himself. But he had. He’d respected her wishes.

Seven kingdoms, she’d wanted him to touch her. And she’d wanted to touch him.

Maybe it was the dreams still lingering. Maybe it was her own madness coming through because she wouldn’t have done it without the perfect circumstances, but she eased his hair off his horns, smoothing the strands back into place.

For a crazed moment, she let her guard down. She had to feel everything, eventually. The lake inside her was filled to the brim, and she feared it would overflow. Or worse, it wouldn’t let her hide any more of her emotions within it.

He was asleep. Surely he couldn’t feel anything. She would open the floodgates all at once, feel everything for a few moments and endure. And then, when the lake was halfway empty, she’d close it again. Ready for whatever Greed might throw at her.

It was a crazy thought, but she still did it. Selene let all those emotions out at the same time, letting them swell over her head and crash down. All the fear, the desire, the heartbreak and homesickness. It came out in a strange sludge, a mixture of emotions that should never be together. Her stomach twisted, vomit rising in her throat and then subsiding as the better emotions overwhelmed the bad.

She’d survived this long with them, she supposed. They lived inside her, likely spreading their poison in a way she could never outrun. But all at once, they were horrible and wonderful, nightmarish and a dream.

Even this was like a dream. Lying beside him, her heart in her throat and desire burning so deeply through her that she couldn’t even think straight.

And then, with the sunlight glittering off the lilac and sapphire chips of his eyes, he blinked awake to stare at her. The lazy haze in his gaze made him appear harmless, a thought she’d never expected to link with the man lying next to her.

“You stayed,” he said, his voice deep and thick with sleep.

She slammed the walls shut so hard she felt the answering ache sear through her body. But she couldn’t let him get even a hint of that power inside her, nor could he know that she wanted him so badly that it made her shake.

Her breath catching in her throat, she watched him for any reaction at all. “Where else would I go?”

“Poor moon,” he whispered, shifting a strand of her hair away from her face. “All alone in this place, with nowhere to go but the bed of a demon.”

“It’s a comfortable bed, at least.”

“It is.” A small frown wrinkled his brow and his lips set in a firm line. “For a moment there I thought I felt—”

Panic made her move. She grabbed his wrist, holding it against her to force his attention back to this moment. “You felt nothing, demon king.”

“Oh, but I am almost certain that I did.”

He rolled over her, the silken sheets slipping from his body like water as he fit himself between her thighs. The weight of him pressed her against the mattress, so decadent, so heavy. He pressed against her, his hard cock wedged so tightly between her legs that she nearly choked on the pleasure of it. He rocked against her, once, twice, brushing a tender part of her body that nearly made her moan.

Selene set her jaw, grinding her teeth and glaring up into that beautiful face. He had his eyes squeezed shut, his face the picture of rapture as he moved against her. And it almost broke her. The way the golden light highlighted the flexing muscles of his shoulders, the tense set of his jaw. He was so handsome and so dangerous.

But then he sighed and slowed his movements, easing to a stop that pressed the perfect spot and far too wrong. She needed him to move. She wanted to feel that pressure again because she was so fucking close and...

Selene was thinking like a fool. He was not some handsome man she’d met who didn’t mind a quick afternoon with her. He was a demon king, and the wrong person for her.

Somehow, her hands had come to his forearms. She squeezed the muscles there tightly, breathing hard and staring up at him in shock. He had yet to open his eyes, though the muscle of his jaw ticked as he ground his teeth.

Finally, he blew out a long breath and opened those lovely eyes. He looked her over, seeming to make sure that she was all right.

She was fine. She just didn’t know what to say. If Selene opened her mouth, she was afraid she’d ask him to continue. That she’d ask for him to move and ignore all the feelings between them. That it was all right if she couldn’t look at him the next day, because all she wanted was to feel him rocking against her again.

But neither of them could do that. She knew it. He knew it. That was why he’d stopped.

He tilted his head to the side, staring down at her with that frown still on his face. “The thought of your lust is enough to drive me mad, Selene. I want to know what it tastes like. What you taste like. The thought seeps into my dreams and even in sleep, I think about taking you. About driving you to the very edge of madness before I let you come wrapped around me. It’s enough to make a man lose his head, but it is not what I promised you. For that, I apologize.”

And then he rolled off her and stood up from the bed.

The lack of him made her feel strangely... empty. She wanted him back, and she wanted to tell him to do exactly that. Fill her to the point of pain, make her scream his name as she let herself feel what he wanted her to feel.

His words echoed in her mind. He claimed to know what she wanted even if she didn’t. No part of her doubted that he would make sex enjoyable for her, even without Selene telling him what to touch or where to taste. His amount of experience would only make his claims even more possible.

And she wanted that. Oh, how she wanted it. But she had to be the one to deny him because if she didn’t, then she’d lose herself in him. Selene feared she’d never find her way back to herself.

Gathering up a handful of the sheets, she held it against her chest even though she wore a nightgown that covered her from wrist to neck. It didn’t matter. She always felt like she stood in front of him, naked as the day she was born.

“Are you getting up now?” he asked. He moved about the room without hesitation, lithe and confident in his movements like he wasn’t rock hard and tenting his pants, so it was impossible to look anywhere else.

“I—“ She tried to clear the jumble of thoughts in her head. “Do I need to?”

“Not precisely. I imagine you will have to meet with my brother, considering you’re largely the reason he’s coming. But I wouldn’t mind taking him around the castle a few times to ease his natural tendencies before he sees you. While I understand you may be immune to my powers, it would be absurd to think you could deny all of us.”

The thought made her question what to do. She could ignore all of their powers if she wanted. Selene could stuff all those emotions away for a later time, although she feared what two powerful demons would make her do. After all, she was just one woman, and they were an overwhelming amount of emotion if they wanted to be.

But it would look suspicious if she could avoid all of their powers. She should probably let Greed influence her, but that was terrifying in its own rights. She didn’t know what she would do if she let his powers swell inside her.

Would she steal? Absolutely. She used to steal cookies when she was little, and she didn’t doubt that she’d do it again here. And what about with Lust? Greed was very similar in its desires. Greed had people take what they wanted, no matter the cost. And she wanted Lust.

More than she’d ever wanted anything else.

No, she couldn’t let Greed influence her. But she could put on a good show that would make him believe he could.

“Whatever you think is best,” she murmured, looking down at her free hand in her lap. She tried to make it look relaxed. Why did her fingers keep coiling into that fist as though preparing for a fight? She wasn’t going to battle. She didn’t have to protect herself.

A warm hand slid underneath her chin, cupping her jaw and forcing her to look up at him.

Lust stared down at her with worry lines between his eyes. And that was something she’d never seen before. “I won’t let him take you, Selene. You know that.”

“I do,” she whispered. “But that doesn’t mean he won’t do other things.”

“I know you believe all of us to be demons, and that your mother made it seem like we were all evil to a fault. We are not. Besides, what would Greed even make you do?” He snorted before releasing her. “There’s nothing here that you want.”

Except there was.

Him.

Lust gathered up an armful of clothes before sauntering toward the door. “I’ll get dressed in another room, considering it takes a village to prepare me. Take your time, little moon. Greed will be here by the time the sun hits its peak in the sky, but I won’t expect to see you until dinner.”

And then he was gone. Leaving her alone with her feelings that already threatened to drown her.

She didn’t know how long she stared at that door until a little misty being slipped underneath it. Affection looked at her with bright eyes, and that darned yellow glow cast shadows on the wall. “Oh! You don’t think he’s that bad anymore, do you?”

Growling out a frustrated breath, Selene landed flat on her back on the bed again. She dragged a pillow over her face and screamed into it.

Because the spirit wasn’t wrong. She thought she might actually like the bastard after all.