Ten Dianna

“You know, this whole sneaking-in thing really does something for me.”

Samkiel chuckled under his breath as he half turned, peering over my head. I wore the skin of one of the healers, using it to check if the coast was clear before he followed. Luckily, the hall on the lowest level of Jade City was empty. It seemed the healers stayed on schedule. Lights out meant lights out here. A wink and a snap followed as he sent a tendril of his power into the locked door. A flow of silver crept over the square metallic lock, and then the door opened.

My hands snaked around his waist, connecting as I rested my head against his shoulder.

He patted my hand, snickering. “Don’t get too excited. This is merely recon. We are simply gathering information about why a city full of healers would keep secrets from their own.”

I smiled and stepped in behind him, tracing a lazy path up his back. “Still turned on.” I walked past him, glancing into the room. It was a lot smaller than I would have thought, given the massive spelled lock on the outside. A staircase covered in vines and flowers of every color led to a balcony that wrapped around the room. Two tables, with an array of empty vials and worn pages, took up most of the space.

The room was dark, without a single candle lit. Shelves took up the furthest walls with a mix of small leafy plants to colorful large shrubbery with thorns growing from the side. I moved closer, taking a look as I heard Samkiel’s footsteps head toward my right. He was doing the same.

My hand reached out, ghosting over some of the clear, smooth jars. A bioluminescent plant in one seemed to follow my fingers, pressing against the glass.

“Pretty.”

Samkiel’s hand grasped my wrist with a smack, pulling me back.

“And dangerous.”

I glanced at him. “What?”

He nodded at the jar. Sickly yellow shimmering lights replaced the previous beautiful colors. The plant, or I suppose not plant, let out a small, high-pitched screech. It opened its circular mouth, exposing its serrated teeth, and suctioned itself to the glass.

“What the fuck is that?”

He slid his thumb over my pulse before letting go of my wrist. “A shurvuae. They are often used in ancient magics. The old ones said they could suck out the most lethal poisons, but if left too long, they could be fatal. Although poison seems to be their favorite meal.”

Samkiel stepped forward, and the small creature in the jar seemed to vibrate. It turned from me and focused on him, latching on to the jar closest to him. The sound it made had my skin crawling.

I stepped closer to him. “Does it think we are poisoned?”

“No, I believe it senses power as well. Most creatures above a certain rank or order can.”

“Well, then, you must be a buffet to him.” I playfully smacked him on the ass before turning away to look around the room. “Why keep that? Why all of this? I know I am new to this world, but why lock it up? Are they afraid of their own people?”

“I doubt it. It could be a precaution because of Nismera’s rule, but half of the vegetation here seems illegal.”

“Maybe that’s why they don’t tell Miska.”

“Perhaps. She is young. Under the right pressure, she would reveal any secrets.”

“Like the ones she spilled last night?”

Samkiel nodded and formed a silvery ball of light in his hand before lowering to a squat and moving a few jars out of the way. He held a smaller one in his palm, the beige prickly fern stuck to one side. “Like this? This is used to sedate beasts far larger than you can turn into.”

“Maybe they are not just treating people in the city.”

He placed the jar back and stood, but I saw that corner of his jaw twitch. I watched as he chewed on the inside of his cheek and knew what was running through his mind.

“They haven’t said anything about this or given you an indication of what they are doing?”

He glanced at me before moving forward to another shelf. “No, no, they have not.”

“So.” My hand danced across the table near me. “Do you want me to kill them now or later?”

A deep sigh left his lips as he continued to look around. “I prefer no killing, my akrai. I wish to know what they are doing with so many illegal works here, and I plan to ask the queen herself.”

“Well, that’s no fun.” I blew out a breath. “There should at least be some corrosion.”

He cut his eyes toward me, that storm-colored gray flashing. “Dianna.”

“Samkiel,” I repeated, lowering my voice in a mocking tone.

“Please do not kill anyone for me.” His brows flicked at me. “All we know is they have illegal products.”

“Which probably means they are evil,” I said.

“Or,” he added, “they are trying to make do or make ends meet in a turbulent world. I’ve seen no signs of wrongdoing besides these products, and they have helped us. Circumstances can make people go to lengths they usually wouldn’t in order to survive in a new world.”

His words hit a part of me I hadn’t thought about in a while. I wondered if that was how he saw me in the beginning: a woman desperate to survive.

“You’re so sweet. It’s sickening,” I said, smiling at him. Hopping up onto one of the tables, I crossed my legs and drew a slash across my chest before holding my hand up. “I promise not to maim or kill anyone unless they hurt or threaten you. If that happens, I’ll burn them alive. Deal?”

“Deal.” Samkiel snickered and shook his head as he turned back to the shelf nearest him, still holding that silver flickering ball of power. My stomach dropped when his eyes didn’t linger on me or run over me in the way they usually did when he thought I wouldn’t notice. My eyes roamed over his back, legs, and up once more. Hunger, sharp and painful, pierced my gut.

“You know.” I dragged the word and leaned back on the table, thrusting my breasts forward. He didn’t so much as glance at me. “Since we already know they are harboring plants that have been banned, we could do something else since we are here.”

He looked at me over his shoulder. “And what’s that?”

“We can role play.”

Samkiel cocked his head as if I’d spoken a foreign word. “And what’s that?”

The smile that danced across my face was downright dangerous as I slid off the table. “I can be a slutty healer who wants to tend to your wounds.” I worked the off-white gown open, pushing the sheer sleeves off my shoulders. The material fell, bundling at my waist, revealing rose-colored breasts, not my own. I expected his eyes to dart there and stay, waiting for that darkening they did every time I made a suggestive comment. I always loved it, though. He responded so completely to me, and it was my favorite thing to press his buttons and have him unravel at my feet, but the reaction I got now was the complete opposite. His lip curled as if I just insulted him, and his eyes held mine. There was no lust or overwhelming passion, not even a flicker.

“What?” I asked, swallowing the growing lump in my throat.

A single snap from his free hand had the dress covering me and tied once more. “Why would I want that?”

I was confused, especially given the tone he used. He sounded angry, the complete opposite of what I wanted.

“It’s just for fun.”

“Why would being with another be fun for me?”

“It’s not another.” I shook my head, perplexed. “You know it’s me.”

His frown deepened, his lip curling up in disgust. “It’s you wearing the flesh of another being. That, by definition, is another.”

“Well . . .” Now, it was my turn to be dumbfounded. I stumbled over my words, unsure of what to say next. In my thousand years of existence, this had never once happened to me. Other lovers I had before him never minded. Most of them even encouraged it. Kaden actually preferred it on most nights when he could stomach me, but I wished to bury those memories deeply. “I wasn’t trying to make you mad. I just thought . . . I don’t know what I thought.”

“I am not mad, perhaps a little taken back at such a ludicrous suggestion, but not mad. That . . . does nothing for me.”

That sinking, dreadful feeling in my gut suddenly dried up, and another emotion, just as poignant, seeped in. “Wait, really? Nothing? Not a single tickle of excitement? A half-swell in your cock?”

“I promise, there is zero swelling.” Samkiel didn’t grin or smirk, not even a small chuckle as he stared at me. “Is this a common thing you used to do? Before?”

My stomach dropped, but I said nothing, as if my lips had suddenly been sealed shut.

Samkiel chewed the inside of his cheek once more before slowly nodding. “With all due respect, akrai, do not compare me to him or what you’ve experienced with your past lovers. I don’t need nor want any other form but the one you wear daily. Do you understand?”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“You might not have, but that is how it came across. You, Dianna, my dark-haired, fiery vixen, are and will always be enough for me. No shape or form or thing you bend to will ever make any part of me swell, as you put it, like you. Understand?”

I hopped off the table and walked over to him, not stopping until I wrapped my arms around him. He rested his cheek against the top of my head, and I hugged him tightly. He wrapped his arms around me, engulfing me in his arms. Perhaps it was truly a funny thing not to realize how broken or damaged you were until someone came along and picked up every single fractured piece and showed you how just being you was enough.

“You really mean that? I couldn’t tempt you in another form?”

Samkiel’s chest rumbled as he laughed before placing a kiss on my cheek.

“While you can take any shape you want, your true form is the one I prefer. So no, not even on your best day.”

My form shimmered, my bronzed glow replacing the pink-hued skin. Thick dark curls spilled over my shoulders, the ends tickling my lower back. I pulled away and glanced up at him.

This time, when he looked at me, that swirling emotion I had expected to see deepened in his eyes. “There’s my girl.”

I raised up on my tiptoes, my lips brushing across his in a chaste kiss.

“Now that,” he made a noise in the back of his throat as his thumb danced back and forth over my cheek, “that does something to me.”

“Good.” My hands snaked from the planes of his back and slid lower.

He grabbed my hands. “Stop.” He laughed a deep, throaty chuckle before prying my hands from him and playfully pushing me away. “Help me figure out why they would keep these plants and herbs so carefully hidden away.”

I smiled, nodding as I held my hands up innocently. Samkiel turned back toward the jars lining the shelves. So many samples carried either small, fragmented bits or chopped-up versions. I paused at a jar with dark specks floating in a blue liquid and opened it. My nose curled as the smell hit me, and I gagged, putting the lid back on and placing it back where I found it.

“Maybe we can put this one in the hair care of the girls being mean to Miska.”

“Dianna,” he said, his tone laced with warning.

“What?” I joked, inspecting another jar. “I’m not going to.”

Maybe. I smiled to myself as I found another with what looked like a crushed root, the small branches scattered at the bottom. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and I glanced over my shoulder, catching Samkiel looking at me. He saw and looked away, clearing his throat.

“What?” I asked, knowing that look as I moved to another shelf.

“What?” he asked, standing.

“You tell me.” I reached for another jar, this one with crushed leaves. “You’re the one with the questioning face.”

He was silent for a moment. The only sound in the room was the tinkling of glass as he replaced a jar.

“Very well, I do have one question.”

“Hmm?”

“Are you feeling all right? Physically? Do you feel well?”

Dread crept in, and not one of past insecurities. It was one built on a lie, or more so, a truth I had not told him yet. “Yes. Why?”

He shrugged, pretending it was nothing, yet he glanced at me over his shoulder quickly. “You just seem more . . . ravenous than normal. Not that I am complaining, but if there is something I am not doing right or well enough, you would tell me, correct?”

I nearly dropped the jar I was holding on the floor, and a snicker left my lips. My hand rushed to cover the sound as he scowled and turned to face me fully.

“This is not funny. I am being beyond serious.”

I dropped my hand. “I know. That’s why it is hilarious. Sami. Please. Do you really think I am not satisfied?”

“I don’t know.” He scratched his brow. “It’s stupid. Forget I said anything.”

“It’s not stupid,” I reassured him.

Of course, my descent back into thrash would be weird for him, too. My need for blood, sex . . . all of it, had increased. I was ravenous as if the void inside of me had grown and was begging me to fill it. The only problem was, I couldn’t tell him that. He’d ask what had changed, and then I’d have to explain everything to him. I was not ready for that.

I had seen the world honestly, and now, thanks to him, I had also seen realms and places I never knew existed. I had seen stars and moons far larger than my own, which astonished me. But nothing compared to this powerful, beautiful, handsome god king shoving his heart toward me and praying I did not hurt it. He was by far the most shocking and wondrous thing I had ever experienced.

I stepped closer to him, constantly drawn to him as if he had his own gravitational pull on me. I placed my hands on his biceps, drawing lazy circles with my thumbs, his muscles jumping beneath my touch.

“I promise it’s not stupid, nor am I laughing at you. I’m just surprised that you, out of all the people in the universe, would think I would not be satisfied. Maybe you’re just too good, and it makes me even more greedy.”

With that small, simple compliment, I watched his ego re-inflate, and I would not replace it with worry.

“Well . . .” He half shrugged, glancing away, but I saw his devilish smirk. “When you put it that way, I suppose it garners some truth.”

I smiled. Regardless of if I hadn’t told him the full truth, he knew me better than anyone. My heart fluttered, and my stomach sank. I hated I couldn’t tell him that truth. He was right. I was hungrier and in more ways than one. I wasn’t sleeping either, not nearly as much as I used to. No matter how well he fucked me or how my body should crave sleep after our long training sessions, I just lay awake. Reggie was right. Something happened in that tunnel. Something had been wrong with me since we arrived, and I kept burying it under the guise of stress, but I knew the truth. I gave up something down there in the cold when death visited. I gave up something valuable so he could live, and I didn’t know how to tell him. He would be mad at me for lying and then mad at me for what I did.

But right now was not the time to tell him. Now we had a bigger issue to deal with. Or was that just another pretty little lie I told myself?

The skin on the back of my neck prickled. Samkiel’s eyes widened one second, and he grabbed my arm, moving us to the back of the room. He pressed me to the wall in between shelves of jars as the door opened.

As she stomped in, the woman hissed and slammed her satchel down on one of the tables. She was one of the older healers. Lyrissa was her name. I remembered because she was the bitchiest. She moved toward the shelves furthest away from us, cursing to herself and grabbing a few jars to stuff them into her bag. She kept speaking to herself, but it was too fast for me to catch. I held my breath and gripped the back of Samkiel’s arm as she stomped toward us. A wave of energy wrapped around us, and the room faded to gray. Samkiel’s head whipped toward me as Lyrissa looked right at the space we were in and reached out to grab a jar right by Samkiel’s shoulder. She turned and grabbed her satchel before storming out, closing the door behind her.

I let go of Samkiel’s arm as he turned to me. “The inbetween?”

“Yeah.” I nodded and glanced at the door. “I haven’t tried that in a while, and I’m glad it worked.”

Samkiel said nothing, staring at me in pure astonishment. He went to speak, and the room went blurry.

“That’s weird,” I said, my voice sounding odd to my ears.

“What?”

“There’s two of you,” I said just before darkness claimed me.