Forty-Three Tobias

Two Days Later

Heath and Andrew's Safe House, Somewhere in New England

Iwas once told that I was worthless and that my existence was nothing but an inconvenience to those who had the misfortune of being associated with me. Walking into my life could bring an unimaginable nightmare, where waking up was worse than death itself. Aurora, El Jefe, and Oliver had one thing in common: me.

When we were alone, Zero had told me that The Firm was the one who placed the hit on Aurora. She uncovered emails between The Firm's leaders and the assassins who took her life. "Did you wanna read them?" she'd asked. I didn't. Zero's words were enough, and I refused to relive the horror again. They didn't deserve what happened to them, but their deaths brought me closer to the truth among the chaos that had surrounded me ever since I could remember. I will avenge them.

I was once told that forgetting was the only way to move forward, letting go of the good, the bad, and everything in between. Believing that love didn't exist made living my life devoid of any meaningful purpose much easier. It'd served me well—until it didn't.

"You have two options: allowing yourself to be loved and risking getting hurt, or spending the rest of your life hurting because you never allowed yourself to be loved. You pick your poison." Archer had said when I told him about me and Abel.

A strange emotion had burrowed in my heart from the first time I'd touched Abel, and, after almost losing him, I realized that I was falling for him. He'd seen the ugliest side of me, and he was still here. Somehow, this young man and the hard truth of believing I could be loved were all that stood between me and a lifetime of happiness. Happiness that I was made to believe I didn't deserve.

It was funny how I could make myself believe almost anything. I could be loved, the voice in my head echoed. I, for once, believed it.

The sun dipped below the horizon, painting the room a glowing amber. I stood in front of the window overlooking the vast expanse of dark forest below. I pulled the metal lever open to let in the fresh air. The breeze whispered through the trees, carrying a sense of serenity that embraced me.

I was once told that my destiny had already been decided. For years, those words were engraved in the recesses of my mind, a constant reminder of my existence. I was merely a puppet in the hands of fate and the people who had the power over me. I closed my eyes, letting the gentle rhythm of my breathing soothe my mind while clarity washed over me like a cleansing tide. What if fate was not a chain binding me to a predetermined path, but rather a guiding hand nudging me in the direction of my true purpose? If my fate had already been decided, then it was up to me to shape my life into something meaningful, something worth fighting for.

"What's on your mind?" Abel asked, taking me out of my reverie.

A smile tugged my lips before I turned around and faced him.

His hair was damp, his chest and abs glistening. A hint of soap lingered in the air, teasing me. "And you're right, by the way. The shower was incredible." Soft laughter escaped his mouth. "You should join me next time."

I didn't speak. Words would fail to express what I felt for this man anyway. I stepped forward, my eyes never leaving his.

"Where do you want me?" he asked, turning away. He brought his hand behind his back, glancing at me from his side. "I'm all yours." An invitation too powerful to resist.

"I wanna try something different," I said, heading to the nightstand and grabbing a small bottle of lube. I hurried back, my body already missing his warmth.

Abel moaned as I planted soft kisses on the side of his neck. His chest rose and fell, the sound of his breath filling the room. "Anything you want, Daddy," he uttered.

I pulled him closer, his body molding into mine as if he was made just for me. "Tobias," I whispered. As expected, he shivered when my lips brushed the back of his ear. With each tender kiss, goosebumps covered every inch of his skin. I spun him around and brought our faces together. I traced my finger over the small cuts and bruises on his face. "Tonight, I'm Tobias. Nothing more, nothing less. Just me."

Abel nodded, pinning me with his sparkling eyes. "Tobias."

I watched his lips move, forming the syllables of my name. The sound had never been sweeter. "Again."

"Tobias." Abel ran his hand across my abdomen, up to my ink-covered chest, and down to my tattooed arms. He kissed my neck while whispering, "Tobias." Then his lips found my right cheek. "Tobias." He planted another soft kiss on my left cheek next. "Tobias."

My heart was full, overwhelmed by the thought of happiness. I pulled my shirt off before grabbing the back of his neck. I leaned in and brought our mouths together. My hands were busy peeling away the towel wrapped around his waist. "I wanna feel you inside me," I said when we parted for some air.

"What?" Abel studied me, shock plastered on his face.

"You. Inside me." I caressed his cheeks with my knuckles. "All of you." This was uncharted territory for me, but there was one thing I knew for certain: I wanted Abel to be the first and last man to touch me that way.

"But you've never done it," he said. Abel swallowed hard, his eyes burning with passion.

"I want to with you—and only you." I smiled—another wonderful thing Abel had showed me how to do. As I reflected on my life, I realized I could count on one hand the number of times I'd genuinely smiled, and the last time felt like forever ago.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." I nodded and loosened the string of my sweatpants, letting them fall to the floor. I stepped out of them, leaving them gathered around my ankles. "I trust you." I reached for his hand, kissed his knuckles, then guided him to my cock. "Ohhh," I gasped when he wrapped his hand around it.

"I'll make you feel good." He licked my neck, while his palm slid up and down my dick, playing with the small barbel under the head of my shaft.

I would let go of all the control; no tricks, only a connection to fill the longing in my heart. Tonight, I'd succumb to my body aching for Abel. I'd let myself fall for him again. Just like yesterday and the day before. I'd continue to fall for him tomorrow and until there were no more days to live. You'd never have to forget your past to have a future with me, he'd said. Abel didn't know how much I needed to hear that. I used to think that it was one or the other. The past or the future. I didn't have to choose.

I stepped backward until my legs brushed the foot of the bed. I sat down and looked up at the most beautiful person I'd ever seen. I tossed the bottle of lube to the foot of the bed and cherished the perfect man standing in front of me. Abel and I were two shattered pieces, yet somehow our broken parts formed a bond stronger than the scars that once defined us.

"Thank you for saving me," Abel said.

I shook my head gently. "No, you saved me," I said. That was the honest-to-goodness truth. Abel was my savior.

I kissed his stomach, tracing the ridges of his abs with my pierced tongue. I cupped his ass cheeks and pulled his crotch closer to my face. His scent never failed to intoxicate me.

Abel played with my lips, running his thumb around them, guiding my mouth open.

I took a deep breath and swallowed before steering his cock into my mouth. His hard dick continued to swell. I hollowed my cheeks to make room for his girth. I gagged when his head hit my tonsils, my upper body convulsing.

He tried to pull out, but I stopped him, pulling his hips deeper instead.

Tears welled as I choked, but I didn't falter; I continued swallowing him until my throat got used to his length. A gurgling sound left my mouth when Abel was balls deep in me. I pulled him out of my mouth completely, and his cock bobbed with my spit.

I took another deep breath before taking him back in with a slurp.

"Your mouth feels so good," Abel mumbled when I played with the head of his shaft with the metal orb in my tongue. His legs trembled when I rolled the small globe around the ridges of his swollen tip. "Tobias …" he moaned. His voice was music to my ears. He gripped my shoulders, stopping me from servicing his dick. "Slow down or I'll bust a nut right now."

Not wanting the moment to end too soon—even though I knew Abel could go multiple times—I freed his swollen dick. I wiped the drool all over my face and spread my legs wider.

Abel kneeled in front of me, grinning. "My turn," he said. He held my balls with his hand while he lined my cock to his mouth. His tongue licked the small barbell under my shaft, teasing. He brushed his cheek against the length of my dick while stroking the side of it with a feather-like touch.

"You're not gonna make me beg, are you?" I asked, fighting the urge to drag Abel by the head down to my cock.

"Maybe," Abel teased.

"Suck me, baby," I begged.

"Baby," he repeated. "I love the sound of that." Abel tugged my balls then wrapped his lips around my dick.

I palmed the back of his bobbing head, watching as my cock disappeared into his talented mouth.

Abel lifted my legs off the floor, planting my feet on the bed.

My body tensed, feeling exposed in a vulnerable position. This was Abel and he wouldn't do anything to hurt me, I reminded myself. I loosened my tense shoulders and leaned back. I propped my body up with my elbows—I needed to see his face.

Abel's hand joined his mouth sliding up and down my length. He slathered more spit on his hand, and once his fingers were soaked, they traveled down my ass crack, sliding over my hole.

My ass clenched when his digit stopped and pressed at my hole. Even though I was expecting the pressure, it still took me by surprise.

He popped my dick out of his mouth and looked up at me, concern written all over his face. "Did that hurt? Do you want me to stop?"

"No, I don't want you to stop," I replied.

"Try to relax."

I nodded and arched my back.

The bottle cap popped and the pressure pushing into my hole resumed. Abel's finger was cool from the lube. He rubbed circles around my virgin hole before doubling the pressure. "Remember to relax," he reminded me. The tip of his finger pressed in, causing discomfort and increasing my arousal at the same time.

I steadied my breathing, loosening the clasp of my ass on Abel's finger once I remembered to relax.

"You're doing so good, Tobias," he praised. "My finger is all in." Abel slowly moved his lubed fingers in and out of my ass.

I shivered from the sensation; like an internal hand job. My cock stiffened even harder.

"We're gonna go nice and slow." Abel's mouth was back on my dick, and I nearly came when he sucked my cock and finger-fucked me at the same time.

"Oh my fucking god," I muttered. I didn't know how much I could take before I exploded.

"I'mma double up," Abel said.

I moaned in agreement, despite not having a clue what he meant. "Ohhh baby." I bucked my hips when the pressure in my ass increased. The pleasure was too much, yet I wanted more. I needed Abel inside me.

Abel pushed my abs down with his hand. "You're so fucking hot, Tobias. You should see yourself." He kissed the tip of my dick before devouring it.

"Fuck!" I screamed when Abel pressed a sensitive spot inside my ass. I splayed my arms on the bed, gripping the white linen sheet. "What the …?" My eyes rolled to the back of my head when he pressed the same spot again, harder this time. The sensitive area felt like an orgasm multiplied to a hundred without blowing my load.

"You like that?" he asked.

"Fuck yeah," I panted.

"I'm gonna add another finger to get you ready for me, okay?"

I couldn't believe sex could be this explosive—and we were just getting started. My ass struggled to get three of Abel's fingers in. "Hang on." I grabbed his wrist before he tried again. "Give me a sec." I willed the muscles around my ass to get used to the thickness. The resistance didn't last long, partially because I really wanted him inside me. "Okay," I said after a few seconds.

Abel's fingers went in and out of my hole, each time hitting that sweet spot. Now I understood what he was talking about before. He stood in front of me, his hard cock leaking with excitement. "Lay all the way back," Abel said. He lifted my waist and pulled my hips, lining my ass near the edge of the bed. "Are you ready for me?" I couldn't miss the desire in his eyes and the fire in his voice. Another sound of the bottle cap popping cut through the silence in our room.

"I want you inside me," I answered. "Now."

"No condom?" Abel asked, searching the bed for a rubber.

"No." I shook my head. "I want all of you."

He squeezed the bottle of lube over his cock, lathering his shaft with a generous amount. "Here it comes," he said, positioning his cock to my opening, then pushing his tip inside.

I gritted my teeth. "Give it to me!" I said, grabbing his hips.

His dick slid deeper with each of my moans and grunts. "Fuck," Abel uttered when he was all in.

"You're so big, baby, and you feel so fucking good," I said.

He spit on his palm then reached for my dick. He started stroking me using my pre-cum and his saliva as lube. His pace quickened with each thrust. Abel buried his cock as deep as he could get, while hitting my tender spot and sending me over the edge.

Abel gripped my waist with his free hand and continued pounding my ass, his eyes never leaving mine. "Tobias," he moaned.

He jerked my cock in sync with his thrusts. Once in a while, Abel's eyes and head rolled back, a picture of raw ecstasy.

I was losing control; my throbbing cock was ready to blow any moment. "I wanna come with you," I said.

Abel nodded. "Together," he said, his mouth wide open. Beads of sweat dripped down his face.

"Come here." I pulled his body closer to mine and kissed him. Our tongues danced a familiar dance. Abel and I were connected: mind, body, and soul. I grabbed his ass, slamming him deeper into mine. "Keep going, baby," I whispered, biting Abel's earlobe.

The carnal sounds coming from his mouth were incomprehensible. Abel began to speed up, gearing up for an ecstatic finish.

"Abel." All my nerves gathered around my cock when Abel's tight abs rubbed my dick. "I'm getting close."

"Me too, Tobias," he growled. He rocked his body against mine while fucking my ass. "I wanna see you come." Abel pushed up, and I lifted my legs apart. "Fuck …" he muttered. It was pure joy watching Abel top. "I'm getting close."

I spit on my hand and fisted my dick while watching him.

He moved his head back and forth, mumbling and moaning. He opened his eyes and took over jacking my cock. "Ready?" he asked.

"Yes." We stared at each other, every shove bringing me closer to coming. "Don't stop. That's it. There you go, baby. Fuck …"

"Me too." Abel's body jerked. "I'm coming!" he yelled as he spilled his load in me.

Jets of white spunk sprayed on my body. Abel continued pumping my cock until he milked the last dribble.

It was the hardest I'd ever come.

He looked down at me and smiled. He laid his body on top of me, his heavy breathing matching mine.

I ran my fingers through his hair. "I love you, Abel," I said. Finally, choices were mine to make, and I chose to be with Abel for as long as I breathed—and that was the most freeing feeling in the world. "Thank you for allowing me to be your present without forgetting my past."

He looked up at me. "I love you too, Tobias."

The sound of those four words were immense; the voices in my head that constantly told me that I wasn't good enough, that I would never be good enough, were quiet. I loved Abel and he loved me. I cherished the moment deep in my bones.

Abel shivered when the cool breeze caressed our skin, carrying with it the faint scent of pine from the nearby forest.

"You're always cold." I chuckled and encased him with my sweaty arms, squeezing him. I looked out the window, which I had forgotten I left open. I inhaled Abel's scent one more time before peeling his body off mine.

Abel let out the most adorable whine in protest.

"What's wrong?" I stroked his head with my hand.

He frowned. "Where're you going?"

"To close the window." I kissed his pout before rising. "I'll be back." I headed to the window and pulled it shut, then stood back in front of him. "You wanna take that shower with me?"

"Hell yeah!" he said, jumping off the bed. "Let's go." He grabbed my hand to lead me to the bathroom. He raised an eyebrow when I didn't move.

I pulled his arms and wrapped them around my neck. My palms traveled down his back to his ass. I cupped his butt cheeks and ground our dicks together. I leaned closer and whispered in his ear, "You don't go until I say so, boy," I growled. I bit the skin on the side of his neck.

Abel whimpered; his dick perked up. "Yes," he mumbled.

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, Daddy."

"Good boy," I said, biting his shoulder. "Go!"

Abel turned and I slapped his ass, the sound echoing in our bedroom.

Tomorrow we would face the mayhem waiting for us. We would live in uncertainty until The Firm was stopped. But tonight, we would make ourselves believe that nothing else mattered in the world but the two of us. No death. No pain. No hiding. No running. Just two souls who found each other in the least likely place, bound by a connection that defied all odds.

I was no gambler, but I'd always bet on us.

The End