Chapter 34

CHAPTER34

Edwin blinked as orange light flickering against an unfamiliar wall. His heart jolted, his first thought of fire consuming the hallways and rooms of Bruxton Hall, but as his weary eyes adjusted and his panic ebbed, he realized it was just the sunset, burning through the window.

Where am I? He glanced around, puzzled by his surroundings. Nothing was recognizable as his own, and there was a strange old man staring at him from a dusty portrait opposite. No one from his family.

At length, his foggy memory began to clear, bringing back the unpleasant events that had brought him to Joanna’s front door. He remembered collapsing and seeing her standing over him, but he could not recall whether she had been smiling or glaring at him. Either way, he knew he was exactly where he needed to be, though he had no notion of how long he had been asleep after the darkness claimed him.

Just then, the bedchamber door opened, and a very familiar figure walked in, humming to herself as she carried a tray of what appeared to be medicines and a teapot with two cups.

Edwin watched his beloved wife, smiling at the fact that she was not aware he had awoken. He observed her as she made her way around the room, setting the tray down on a side table, before rearranging the flowers in the vases and going to the windows to pull the drapes back further. She paused there for a moment, silhouetted by the bronzed light, looking more beautiful than he had ever seen her.

And I might lose her, he lamented, his heart seizing.

As she turned, her eyes flitted toward the bed… and an almighty scream burst from her throat. She quickly clamped a hand over her mouth, leaning back against the window seat to catch her breath.

“You scared me!” she yelped.

“I did not mean to.”

A moment later, she was running toward him, climbing up onto the bed and pulling him into her arms. She smothered him with affection, covering his face in kisses, smiling against his skin as she held him close.

“You slept late,” she said softly, pulling back so she could look at him properly.

He frowned. “How long?”

“A week,” she replied, chuckling. “You must have been exhausted from all of the nonsense.”

“Nonsense?”

She nodded. “Now, I ought to scold you for sitting at my bedside for the entirety of my own sickness. Mrs. Hislop informed me of your nightly vigil, and if I had known, I would have shooed you away. Do you not know that it is dangerous to remain so close to a victim of the plague?”

“You are… only scolding me for that?” A flame of hope ignited in his chest.

She raised a curious eyebrow. “Why, is there something else I ought to be scolding you for?”

“Miss Russell,” he said quietly. “You… ran from the house. You must have thought that I—”

She pressed her fingertips to his lips. “Do not speak of that woman, or I might find myself with a fever too—a fever of irritation.” She smiled. “I know everything, my love. She told me herself, when she visited me just before you arrived. I think she wanted to preserve her future prospects, though Peggy is still deciding what is to be done with the wretch.”

“She told you?” Edwin squinted. “Then, why did you leave me out on the porch steps? Why did you refuse to receive me? Of course, you did not know I was unwell, but if you knew I had done nothing wrong, why would you toy with me?”

She pulled an apologetic face. “I was not toying with you, though I understand it might appear that way. I had ridden for hours through wind and rain and the mud that comes with both. I stank, I looked ghoulish, I had unseemly rips in my dress, and I… wanted to present myself properly to you before I allowed you in. Of course, when I discovered you on the floor, collapsed from your fever, I have never felt more foolish. Well, perhaps I have felt more foolish once, when I believed that you could betray me.”

Edwin did not know whether to be relieved or annoyed, as he thought about the stress and panic that he had endured while outside on the stone bench, uncertain of whether or not anything he said would be enough to convince Joanna of his innocence. But peering up at her anxious face, seeing her smile, holding her in his arms again, the annoyance passed swiftly.

“You could have appeared at the door in a straw sack, your face streaked in dirt, and I would have been overjoyed,” he told her, lifting his hand to her pink cheek, brushing it gently with his thumb. “And I would still have kissed you as if it were the first time.”

She covered his hand with hers. “You must not think of kissing and other such delights, for it might send you back into your delirium.” She flashed a grin. “You were saying rather… obscene things as you slumbered in your fever. I am glad no one else was here to hear it, for they would have been quite shocked.”

“As obscene as your husband not wearing his shirt in the gardens?” he teased, already feeling better, for love was the greatest medicine.

She chuckled. “You will never allow me to forget that, will you?”

“Certainly not. Not until I make it become a reality, at least,” he replied silkily, tracing the fingertips of his other hand down the curve of her neck. “I shall have to ensure the staff are all elsewhere upon that day.”

Joanna smiled. “I had worried you might be lost in nightmares until I heard your fevered mumblings,” she explained. “I believe you were, instead, dreaming of the morning before I fell ill. You mentioned how wonderful it felt to—”

He sat up sharply, catching her mouth with his before she said another word. A slow and meaningful kiss, as if they had been separated for months. There was no better feeling in the world to him, than the response of her lips, moving with his, matching his passion without hesitation.

“I would have missed this, if you were not able to forgive me,” he murmured, slipping his hand around to the nape of her neck, cradling her head.

“I have nothing to forgive you for,” she reminded him, leaning in to kiss him again. “But do not think you shall have your way with me,” she said, pausing for a moment. “You are weakened by the sickness, and I fear that anything more than a kiss might kill you.”

He grinned. “But what a way to die, my love.”

“How macabre,” she teased, running her hands through his hair. “I suppose I should cease being surprised that a mysterious duke who lives in an eerie manor has such a sense of humor.”

His smile faded, his mood turning serious. “I love you, Joanna. I knew it existed in the world, for I saw it between my brother and his beloved, but I never thought it would come to me. I assumed that love only had one ending: a tragic one.” His voice caught in his throat. “But then… there was you. A love that can only end one way: in true and unyielding happiness, for the rest of our days.”

“I love you, too,” she replied softly, her eyes sparkling. “And I know I need not repeat my own story, but just know that you are an unexpected and quite glorious surprise. Even my mother is astonished that you are precisely as you are. Loyal and kind and the great love of my life, I expect. The one person in this world who can encourage me to leave my past and my troubles behind me.”

Edwin’s heart swelled with joy as he tilted his head up, pressing the tenderest of kisses to her soft and plump lips, as if he was sealing a promise to love her for eternity. And her mouth pressed the promise back, her arms looping around his neck as she sank into him, letting the rest of the world fall away.

“I already feel stronger,” he told her, guiding his kisses down the side of her neck to where life pulsed beneath the surface.

She laughed but did not stop him as he grazed his lips across her chest and over the rise of her bosom, easing aside the neckline of her simple, white muslin gown to taste her sweet, pert nipples. She gasped as he sucked upon them, his palms running up the curve of her back, his loins burning as she writhed in his lap, teasing him into a throbbing desire.

“Are you certain?” she asked breathily.

He nodded, bringing her head down so he could kiss her again. “I might need to pause here and there to catch my breath, but I am certain. I need you, my love. You are my medicine.”

The slow and sensual beginning quickly transformed into a rush of desperate desire, the air in the room shifting to one of heightened anticipation as the blissful couple tore at one another’s clothes, removing them as quickly as they could without actually ripping anything.

Edwin’s undressing proved easier, considering he wore nothing but a nightshirt, but he reveled in the unveiling of Joanna’s nakedness. He had, from the first time they had lain together. It was a thrill to peel away the layers, exposing her bare skin piece by piece, like unwrapping a most precious gift. But when she was naked before him, he was the one rewarded by the sight of her heavenly form.

“You are perfection,” he told her, panting, as his hand moved across the swell of her breasts and along the steep curve of her waist, gliding across the shapeliness of her hips and her lean thighs.

She shook her head shyly. “There is no such thing.”

“Which is precisely what a creature of perfection would say,” he replied, smiling so wide it ached in his cheeks.

Holding his face in her hands, she kissed him deeply and lifted her hips upward, until the swollen desire of his manhood caressed the gateway to her hidden depths. A secret garden that he hoped to return to for the rest of his life, where hopes and children and love would continue to blossom.

A moment later, she sank down onto him, her gasp of pleasure whispering against his lips as she took him inside her. She stilled for a moment, breathing hard, her mouth frozen in a half-kiss.

“I have dreamed of this,” she murmured, coming back to life as she finished the kiss she had begun, letting her tongue dance against his.

Edwin moaned in the back of his throat. “As have I. It is all I have dreamed of,” he gasped. “I am sure you heard it all.”

“Not nearly enough,” she told him, rocking her hips forward.

With his hands upon her hips, guiding her back and forth, he felt the squeeze of her thighs and the grip of her muscles, smiling at the old memory of wondering what it might be like to be ridden by her. It was more than he could ever have imagined, his passions spiraling out of control at the sensation of being swallowed up by her, urged deeper into the silken heat of her, while the sounds of her pleasure sparked through the air, fueling the fires of his.

Knowing he needed to slow down, for he wanted it to last as long as possible, he wrapped his arms around her waist and rolled her onto her back. She peered up at him with loving eyes, her lips parted in a stifled breath, as he drew back… forcing himself to withdraw completely.

The look of disappointment upon her face almost made him laugh, as he dipped his head to kiss every part of her his lips could discover, following the constellations of her freckles like a sailor at sea, finding his way home.

Once he reached her hip, he nudged her gently onto her side and slid in behind her, encircling her with his arms. She fit perfectly to the shape and contours of his body, as if they were made for one another, and as his manhood strained to feel the warmth of her once more, he did not resist.

“I love you,” he whispered, close to her ear, as he eased inside her.

Her back arched, her buttocks pushing against him, while her hand gripped his arm, digging her fingernails in. “I love you!” she cried out, twisting her head back to kiss him.

Slowing everything right down, he moved inside her, relishing each powerful, measured stroke and the way she responded, breathless and euphoric. Her backside pushed back to meet every tantalizing thrust, while his hands explored her, caressing her breasts, stroking the soft skin of her stomach, before finding the heat between her thighs.

Knowing what she liked, hearing what pleased her, he let his fingertips circle her secret pearl, matching the pace of his slow thrusts. But it seemed she was also struggling to contain her need for bliss, as she began to move more quickly, setting the pace she desired to feel.

He smiled, kissing her neck as he obeyed her silent command. Strumming her swollen bud, he let go of his inhibitions, plunging into her with delirious abandon, his entire body singing to the melody of her passionate cries and ragged breaths, spurred on by the grip of her fingernails. And she met every stroke with equal urgency, both of them moving as one, perfectly attuned to one another.

Soon enough, he felt the power of his conclusion racing toward him, pulling his muscles tight, stoking embers of bliss that, once fully ignited, could not be stopped. He contemplated slowing his pace, but no sooner had he thought it than Joanna cried out, “Yes, my love! Oh yes, I am… I am…” She did not finish the sentence in words, but in a language much older, much more ancient: the cries of ecstasy.

At the same moment, he tipped over the edge into his own conclusion, calling out for her as the bliss tore through him, spilling over into her. Their bodies strained together in a tangle of limbs and love, as Edwin thrust once more, pushing himself as deep as he could go. There, he stilled as she trembled in his arms, gasping as if she could not gulp down enough air, but he did not cease strumming her most sensitive spot until he was certain that her pleasure had begun to ebb.

As it did, she relaxed in his embrace, turning her head to seek out his lips, kissing him slowly and deeply. He kissed her back, holding her closer, wondering if life could ever get any better than that moment.

“So, this is love,” she murmured, turning in his arms.

He embraced her, smiling as she nuzzled into his neck. “Yes, my darling, I believe this is love.”

“Who knew?” she laughed softly.

“Indeed,” he replied, “who knew.”

They lay there together, bathed in the last glow of sunset, lost in their own private realm. Edwin knew that he was holding his entire world in his arms, and as he pressed a gentle kiss to her soft, silky hair, he thanked the heavens for bringing her to him.

For years, he had believed in curses and ill fortune, carrying a heavy burden of guilt and regret that had, day by day, sapped the life out of him. He had hidden from society, withdrawing to the shadows, believing that was all he deserved for killing his father and not being able to save his brother or his brother’s beloved. But, for the first time in a decade, it felt like his penance had been paid, his atonement drawing to a close.

For the first time in a decade, light had come back into his life, in the form of the woman in his arms. And where there was light, no curse or ill fortune could linger.

From now on, he would be happy, taking his stumbling steps back into the society that had shunned him, and all because of Joanna. A marriage of convenience that had transformed into something beyond his wildest dreams: a marriage he would not, and could not, be without. A marriage of true love. A marriage that, one day, with her encouragement, he would believe he was worthy of.