Chapter Thirty-Six

Marissa stared at the potsand pans cluttering the long expanse of the kitchen counter, and rubbed her brow. Here she was, a chef, and she couldn't figure out what to do with them. Her brain was kind of numb, and the pans weren't even hers. Friends in the community had been coming and going from the house for the last few hours, dropping off things for her to borrow until the Travelers could move her own stuff down here. Nobody had been by for about an hour, though, and being alone left her with nothing to do but think about everything that had just happened.

Her heart ached down to the core over the look she'd seen on Dev's face when he learned all that stuff about his father. The moment the Tribunal adjourned, Dev left ??ran?'s garage with uncharacteristic stiltedness in his stride, glancing only once at Marissa, very briefly, as if he'd been too ashamed to hold her gaze for long. He'd gathered a weeping Luvera into his arms and half-carried her out. That'd been hours ago, and Marissa hadn't seen him since.

So, now here she was, setting up their new home all by herself…something she'd been pushed by the Council to do before she hooked up with Dev, rather than after, as other couples had done in the past. Bonding in the mansion was now prohibited, the new law passed after a newly bonded Gábor had attacked a couple of warriors for doing nothing more threatening than walking past his bedroom to get to theirs. He'd punched a hole in Jeddin's door and nearly ripped the hinges off Kasson's.

Sounded pretty mental. But from what Marissa had learned from the community manual on Varcolac culture—required reading for all new hires—vampires became very protective right after they bonded, especially males, just as Dev had warned her about at her mother's wake. So…maybe it was a good thing their bonding had been delayed. Probably the last thing Dev needed right now was to feel more mental.

Sighing, she picked up a random saucepan and opened one of the cabinets. She might as well put this stuff away while—

"Hey."

She whirled around, gasping.

Dev was standing just inside the kitchen.

"God, you scared me." She blew out another breath. "Weird, I was just thinking about you."

"Yeah?" He rasped a hand over his goatee. "I'm sorry I took off. I guess I needed to hang with Luvera for a while."

"No, I understand." She set the pot down. "Are you feeling better?"

He crammed his hands into his jeans pockets and shrugged. "My perspective is still pretty damned inside-out and backwards. I just found out that the father I looked up to my whole life was a dickhead of the highest order, and the mother who's always been a pain in my ass has every right to be as bitter as she is." He looked down at his boots. "Christ, I remember how painful it was being separated from you for a week, so thinking of my mother having to live her whole life without this guy she was crazy about…" He sighed out a long breath. "I can't help feeling sorry for her."

"Anyone would've grown bitter under those circumstances, Dev."

"I know." He looked up, his eyes igniting with a fiery rage. "And I swear, Marissa, if my dad were alive today, I'd pound his head in."

She bit into her lower lip. That had to feel awful. "I'm sorry."

He pushed a hand through his hair. "On top of everything else, I could stand about a Big Gulp of blood right now."

She ran her eyes over him. "Yes," she agreed. "You don't look so great."

One side of Dev's mouth hooked upward. "A shitload of stress can activate a Varcolac's blood-need, and I'd say what happened tonight qualifies as a mother lode. Not to mention five fucking days spent in jail." He set his palms on the kitchen island. "I considered calling in Ruxandra, but I kept thinking any day I'd get out." He slanted her a look. "Besides, I wanted to wait for you."

She set her hands on her hips. "Good thing you did, buster." The thought of him biting another woman made the tips of her ears burn. She narrowed her eyes on him. "I would've had to kick your ass."

"Oh, ho! Jealous?"

"Hugely."

He looked entirely too pleased by that.

"Don't be a troublemaker." She slipped up next to him and took his hand. "Come on, I want to show you around our new house." She gestured at all the empty space. "Such as it is."

"It'll be fun sprucing it up together."

She smiled. Something about the idea of hanging pictures and moving furniture solidified the reality that they were actually, at last, embarking on their life together. "I hope you don't mind, but I chose the house with the biggest kitchen. We had to give up a den for that, but…I just… I mean, I know I have a restaurant, but I just love big kitchens, and there are four nice bedrooms upstairs, so you can make one of those into your man room. And this house is only three doors down from Toni and Jacken, two from Arc and—"

"Hey, no sweat, sweetheart." His smile lit his eyes. "A house is the chick's domain, right? You get to do whatever you want."

"Hmm, I don't know whether to get all up-in-arms feminist on you or be immensely thrilled."

She took him around the house, pointing out things he probably didn't care about, like the built-in ironing board and the windows in the living room that opened two different ways. But if he wasn't interested, he did a good job of pretending.

"See," she said as they came to stand in the doorway of one of the upstairs bedrooms. "This would make a great man room, wouldn't it?"

He pulled her back against him, fitting the curve of her bottom neatly against his hips. "I'd prefer to fill these rooms with little guys." He set his chin on her shoulder and smoothed his large hands over her abdomen. "When do we get to start doing that, by the way?"

Her lids drifted down at the feel of him caressing her belly. "Well, I'd always planned on having kids around thirty, but—"

"What!?" He straightened abruptly and spun her around. "You want to wait five years, Marissa? Are you insane?"

She held up a hand, cutting off the harangue she saw coming. "If you'd let me finish, for God's sake." She drew in a breath and continued. "I know you're eager for a family, Dev, but I'd like to be married for a bit first, just you and me, for maybe…a year?"

"A year!" he blasted. "Forget it."

"Dev," she said in a measured tone. "Marriage is about compromise, honey."

"Fine. Okay. We'll wait." He reached out and tugged her against him. "A bit." His eyes smoldered. "But don't expect me not to try and convince you otherwise, Riss, every month when your fertile time comes." He bent his head and brushed his lips overs hers. "Betcha I can, too," he said against her mouth, sucking lightly on her bottom lip then tracing it with his tongue.

"Mmm." She slid her hands up the bulging muscles of his chest and twined her arms around his neck. "I look forward to your best efforts." Ridiculously, she did, too, even though it'd probably mean a monthly argument. She touched the tip of her tongue to his and heard him catch his breath. "I was thinking…" She gave him a sultry glance from beneath her lashes. "If you're looking for stress relief, I've got this fun thing we can do."

He laughed deep in his throat. "Are you offering to have sex with me? Finally?"

"Hey, I'm not the one who's been holding up this train. But, yes, it's definitely nookie time."

"Hallelujah." He scooped her into his arms. "I thought the day would never come. Which room's ours?"

She pointed to the one at the far end of the hall, and he carried her inside. The furniture consisted of two folding chairs, a beat-up bureau, and a queen-sized futon flung on the floor, which only had a set of sheets on it, but, oh, well. No way was she stopping to go hunt down blankets.

Dev set her on her feet by the bed, and she stripped down to her bra and panties in record time.

Dev's silver eyes grew bright and hot as he inspected her from top to—His brows suddenly mashed together. "You've lost a lot of weight, Marissa."

"I—?" She cut off her sentence and gaped at him. "Oh, my God, you're kidding me. That's what you have to say in response to seeing me for the first time in my altogether? A criticism?"

"I'm not criticizing. I'm worrying. How the hell can you expect me not to when you"—he gestured up and down her body—"when you're this damned skinny."

Her mouth fell open. Unbelievable!

"You know what would put some meat on your bones?" He wagged a finger at her. "A baby."

Did the man not know when to shut up? He was killing the mood. Exhaling sharply, she whipped her bra off and threw it across the room.

"Because if you—Whoa." His gaze latched onto her bare breasts, an appreciative sound breaking from his throat.

"A much better reaction, thank you."

He groaned. "You have the best nipples, Riss. They make me want to—" He broke off as she whipped her panties down.

His eyes lowered to her soft triangle of tawny curls, and his face colored.

What? No peanut gallery comments now? Good, he was—

She yelped as Dev sprang at her, a low growl emanating from his chest as his brawny arms snapped closed around her. He brought her naked body crushing up against him, his hot, demanding mouth slanting down on hers to—

His arms sprang wide an instant later. "Ouch!" He stumbled away from her and hunched over, a forearm pressed to his lower belly. "Fuck and shit."

She glowered down at his bent form. "I can't believe this happens to you." She threw her arms out from her sides and let them slap back down.

"Well, it does, so…" He craned his head up to squint at her. "I can't do anything more till we bond, especially not with you naked. You still on board with that?"

"Of course." She waved her hands impatiently. "I'm so sick of waiting for you. Let's get on with it."

"All right. Yeah." He exhaled a long stream of air. "I totally agree." He straightened cautiously and took a step back toward her, then paused. "Have you read the manual the community gave you?" he asked. "You know about the first bite…hurting a bit, don't you?"

"Yes."

"Okay." He nodded. "Good."

She jumped slightly when he wrapped his hands around her neck, his thumbs coming to rest at the pulse points on either side of her throat. His gaze darkened, a kind of predatory seductive energy humming into her. His body temperature always ran hot, but now it turned searing, curling around her like steaming bath water, into her as if the water was laced with a sedative.

Her knees weakened and her womb softened.

"The pain doesn't last long." His voice was a low vibration, tickling up and down her spine. "Then Fiin?? takes over and you'll feel awesome. So don't worry."

A sudden tightness pushed into her esophagus. The phrase don't worry always meant there was something to worry about. She licked her lips. "How bad does it hurt, exactly?" The question sped her heartbeat. The manual hadn't offered any specifics on that.

He brushed his thumbs up and down her racing pulse, his touch somehow settling the rhythm. "You'll be fine," he said.

Nice way not to answer a girl's question.

"There's something else," he said.

Her eyelids drooped, her pulse slowing to a low drub. God, she'd never felt so warm and willing. Ask me if I'll have a baby now? She'd agree to ten of them. "Are you doing something to me, Dev?"

"It's a Pure-bred thing," he said in that deep, hypnotic tone. "Just relax."

"Well, quit doing it." Her voice sounded garbled. Maybe she didn't want him to stop.

"I need you to listen to this. It's important." He raised his thumbs to her face, brushing them across her cheekbones. "Once I begin to feed, I won't be able to stop, Marissa. Even if you ask me to. I can't. Don't think I'm an asshole. It's just that if you experience the pain of a bite and not the pleasure, that'll mess up our future feedings together. Do you understand?"

A flurry of butterflies swarmed through her belly. The whole how bad is it going to hurt avoidance was really starting to bother her. "I think I just got cold feet." She tried to step away from him, but he was still holding her face.

"You've got to trust the end game of this, Riss." He curved an arm around the small of her back and hauled her into the vee of his widespread legs, pushing his face into the crook of her neck. He dragged in a deep inhalation of her scent and made a low sound in his chest, then shuddered. "You," he said in a deep baritone, "are going to taste awesome."

The perky crowns of her breasts tingled and tightened. Just like that night months ago in the van, it felt like he could smell her all the way down to the depths of her soul. Her spine melted at the intimacy of it, and her head tipped sideways of its own volition, exposing her throat to him.

Moaning, he inhaled again, his soft lips brushing the sensitive flesh on her neck, the silky burr of his goatee tickling her. "So good," he murmured hotly against her skin, "you smell so good." He lifted his head and gazed down on her.

Her heart rate spiked. Oh, my God! Fangs. Shock stretched her eyes wide. Yes, all right, yes, she'd had a glimpse of Jacken's fangs so she should've been prepared for the sight, but…Lord! Dev's seemed so much longer and sharper—as in, extremely sharp.

Do you know about the first bite hurting?

A shiver iced her belly as her cold feet returned full force.