Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15

JETT

On Thursday afternoon, Jenna and Devin bring the kids over to play at the beach at my house. Even though they live just up the street, they don't have beach access—maybe one of the reasons Jenna insisted that I buy a house with it. She texted earlier this morning asking if it would be okay for them to come, so when I get home, I pull out the beach chairs and the toys I keep at my house before they arrive. It's hard to believe it's been only two weeks since I ran into Ava at the GetAwayHome. It feels like so much has happened since then.

Once Jenna has her youngest, one-year-old Ruby, settled in the sand to play in front of her, she plops into the beach chair between me and Devin, looking exhausted.

"Long week?" I ask. Jenna's always on the go.

"Getting G's stuff all settled has taken more time than I thought." G is what Jenna and her siblings call Miss Maggie, their grandma. It sounds like a rapper name, but maybe that makes it all the more fitting for the close, friend-like relationship Jenna has with her grandma.

"She's impatient to get started on finding another house to add to her GetAwayHome collection." Devin reaches across the arm of his chair to squeeze Jenna's hand. It's like he was born to be her silent support. The first time he brought her home, I saw it. Where Devin is a closet introvert—holding his own with the rowdy football crowd he hung around with in high school—Jenna's outgoing, go-getter attitude complements him in ways I dream about in my future partner. When she puts her mind to something, he quietly helps behinds the scenes to make her dreams come true. They're perfect for each other.

Jenna laughs. "There's one on the market that I want so badly. I just don't know if we can—" She cuts herself off and I raise my eyebrows.

She waves her hand, sharing a quick look with Devin before turning back to me. "It's bigger than the beach house, but it might be worth it. I need to take a look."

"I could?—"

"No, Jett," Jenna says. "You're not buying us another house. This is my business."

I hold up my hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. It was just a thought." The truth is, I have a lot of money and no one to spend it on. "Did you know the Winstons are selling their house?" I nod to the house on one side of mine. "You should buy that one and turn yours into a GetAwayHome." Jenna looks over at the house I gestured toward, her face thoughtful enough that I go on. "It's got four bedrooms and a mother-in-law suite, so you could use both houses on your property as GetAways."

She chews on her lip. "It's almost a million dollars," she says, and I grin, knowing that she's already looked it up. "Out of our price range."

"Hmm," is all I say. It's not out of mine. "Just thought it would be fun to be neighbors, but I guess you don't like me enough for that."

Devin laughs. "It does have beach access. At least we wouldn't have to mooch off him for that."

Jenna rolls her eyes. "Yeah, just the $6,000 mortgage payment." She scowls at me, but her gaze strays to the house next door, her expression contemplative .

"Oh, we'd just buy it outright." I wave at her in dismissal. When will she understand that my contract is more than enough to buy them another house? Just call me the completely silent partner in her GetAwayHome business. "I wouldn't charge you interest, if it makes you feel better."

Devin's laughing harder, and Jenna shakes her head at both of us. "What are you up to tonight?" she asks, changing the subject. Devin pops up to grab Ruby before she makes it to the edge of the water, where her older brothers, Hudson and Ian, are playing. "You said we could stay as long as we wanted but you have to leave at six?"

"I have a date." I grin, trying to feel more excitement than I do. I remember Colby's words about Gabriella when he first met her about not judging her for her social media presence and remind myself I'm not going to decide what dating Hayden is like before we even go out for the first time. Enough people have done that to me that I should know better. There has to be a way for me to balance a more public persona while still keeping my private life private.

"With Ava?" Jenna's expression lights up. "I knew after what happened at Colby's house Sunday night, how worried you were about her, that it would spark something. Gabriella said the way?—"

"Not with Ava," I say. I don't need Jenna to finish that sentence. I could take my pick of options of what Gabriella reported about the way I looked at, treated, held Ava. The whole world got a glimpse of me wearing my heart on my sleeve. Is it that, in that moment, when I watched Ava struggling to breathe, I let everything else fall away? I might still have feelings for her, but it's dangerous, and I don't want to give them too much weight. "It wasn't like that," I tell Jenna. "Of course I was worried about her—it was scary—but just as her friend."

Jenna nods quickly. "Oh, of course. Anyone would be worried." She shrugs like she didn't just get all excited about the idea of me and Ava again .

I look over at Devin, who's sitting in the sand with Ruby, entertaining her so Jenna can just relax and not worry. I hope I'm half the dad and husband someday that Devin is. He's great with Hudson and Ian, everything I expect him to be. He wrestles and rolls around on the floor with them and works to be as involved as Jenna in everything they do. But he came into his own when Ruby was born. He's protective at the same time as he is supportive of her baby adventures—same as he is with Jenna. He follows Ruby to the edge of the water, where she reaches down and splashes her hand in the waves. He's crouched down close, but not pulling her back from any possible danger. Just ready to leap into action if the need arises.

I turn back to Jenna. "You and Gabriella are calling each other now?"

"Sure. We're friends. We text." Her tone is so full of forced nonchalance that my suspicions rise right away. "Who's your date with then?" she asks in a hurry.

"Why don't you ask Gabriella?" I tease. Jenna swats at me from her chair, and Devin, who's following Ruby up the sand back toward us, joins in my laughter. "Hayden Reid," I reply. "I met her at the charity football game a couple weeks ago, remember?"

She nods. "Oh yeah. The girl everyone was saying you were dating. Are you? I thought you said you just hung out there and took that picture because Claire wanted you to."

"We're going on our first date tonight, actually, but we've been texting and talking since then. She's cool."

Jenna eyes me just as contemplatively as she did that house before. "All the moms in my playgroup follow her. I think she has a clothing line coming out or something? Athletic stuff like leggings and all that. My friend Riley won a couple of samples, and she loves them." Jenna leans back into her chair and tips her sun hat down a little lower.

"You're going out with someone Instagram famous?" Devin raises his eyebrows at me and smirks. "Must be a tough life, brother."

I snort with laughter. "If by that you mean I'm forced into dates by my well-meaning manager, yes, it can be kind of tough."

"Forced to date?" Jenna questions, scrunching her nose at me. "I thought you said Hayden was cool."

"She is. I like her. I'm just not excited about how my love life will now be dissected online twice as much, that's all. But Claire thinks it's a good idea."

Jenna frowns, but her sunglasses hide what must be the rest of her scowl. "Okay…"

"You've got at least a hundred pounds on Claire. I think you could take her," Devin says, sitting back down in his chair, but with one eye on Ruby. She keeps crawling around and then sitting up and eyeing her sandy hands with an expression that looks like a mix between disgust and fascination.

"You'd think so," I retort. "But she starts throwing around words like likability and franchise loyalty and the discussion ends pretty quickly."

Devin grunts, which sums up my feelings pretty well.

"It's different," I say, "but I'm going to give it a chance." I lean back, watching Hudson and Ian splash in the shallow waves.

Jenna's expression relaxes. "I guess that's fair. She doesn't seem like your type, but I've only seen a couple of her posts that Riley showed me." Ruby crawls over to her and pats her legs, so Jenna scoops her up into her lap. "The clothes do look really nice," she murmurs.

"Want me to see if I can get you some?" I reach for Ruby, and she happily reaches back. She's so snuggly, resting in my lap and leaning her head back against my chest. Ava's been on my mind a lot recently, so I can't help thinking that we would have all this by now. I wanted all this with her—so badly. More than I wanted football, and that's saying something .

"No," Jenna says, "it's a first date. I don't want to be that person right off the bat. Maybe when you get serious about her." She laughs and I join her. I can't picture it.

But maybe that's because I never stopped picturing forever with Ava. Even after she walked out. Is that why the anger lingered? Because I couldn't let go of that future?

"You're right that she doesn't seem like my type, but who knows?" I say. "Maybe it's time to branch out from what I think my type is."

"Maybe," Jenna murmurs in a tone that says she doesn't agree. Her comment earlier means she's just as stuck on Ava as I've seemed to be the past couple of weeks.

"Why Ava?" I blurt. "What made you think we'd be getting back together just because she's in town?"

Jenna grimaces. "Maybe just hope, Jett. I haven't seen you as happy with anyone as you were with her." She glares at the sand, though, and I wonder if she too is remembering how broken I was when Ava left, the total opposite of my happiness.

I look over at Devin, who nods along to what Jenna said. I'm sure they've discussed Ava thoroughly already, and their opinions probably align, as they do with a lot of things. It's not that Devin just goes along with whatever Jenna says. It's that they work so hard to make each other happy they don't have a lot to disagree on.

"She made a big mistake back then," Devin says, and a slight clench to his jaw tells me he's still as protective of me as he was when I was younger. "But it's easier for us not to let that define her. We weren't in love with her like you were."

"True," Jenna says softly.

"Hmm," I grunt. This is like the distance Miss Maggie was talking about, seeing it through Devin's and Jenna's eyes. They were upset too back then. Ava hurt me. But now they want to see me happy, even if Ava is what makes me happy. And the fact that it's hard for them to imagine someone else, someone like Hayden, making me happy is my own fault. When Ava left, I put everything into football. I didn't date anyone else in college, and my relationships since going pro have been few and far between. I want what Jenna and Devin have: their partnership with each other, kids, the family life. But I haven't put any effort into that. No wonder it feels like the only real option any of us see is Ava, even if my relationship with her ended a long time ago.

Hudson and Ian call for one of their parents to come and play, and since Ruby is happy with me, both Devin and Jenna go down to play with the boys in the water. It leaves me to contemplate what Gabriella might have said to Jenna about me and Ava that has Jenna and Devin ready for Ava and me to get back together.

What they don't understand is that there's no point in letting something happen. That ship has already sailed. Ava and I aren't meant to be like I once thought we were. If she had really loved me, she could have never left. So how can I trust she could ever love me enough to stay forever?

Jenna and Devin are gathering things up when I leave to go pick up Hayden at her condo. I try to shake the wary vibe I have about the date before I get there.

This is a good thing , I tell myself. I need to get my mind off Ava. Since talking to Jenna on the beach, I've been thinking about the last text Ava sent me, a week after she broke up with me. I know you hate this. I do too. But I really believe it's for the best. The easiness to my relationship with Ava was still there when I let the hurt fall away on Sunday, along with the heat I remembered crackling between us from our first date back in high school. I was on the brink of offering to stick around and sleep on her couch on Sunday night to make sure she was okay, so her showing her exhaustion was a great excuse to extricate myself fast and keep my heart safe from her.

But as I drove home, I wasn't thinking about how good it could be now for us if Ava hadn't left. I was wondering what would have happened if I'd answered any of her calls and texts after she broke up with me. If we'd stayed friends, and after college if we might have ended up back together.

And that's why I need to get my mind off her. How can I be contemplating letting myself fall back in love with someone who couldn't handle the hard? Just because I'm playing professionally now and have a great contract doesn't mean the hard is over. I can't trust that Ava won't run away again when she can't handle something.

I ring the doorbell at Hayden's place, and she answers immediately. She laughs at the surprised look on my face. "Sorry," she says, her tone sounding nervous. "I got the time wrong, so I've been ready for half an hour."

I relax and grin. I've been wary, yes, but her easy honesty feels genuine, and that's a good sign. I try for a joke. "You can admit to me you're just hungry. Trust me. I get it."

She laughs, leading the way out of the condo before I get a good look at it. "You caught me."

We walk to the truck, her professional look reminding me of Ava. Black pants, like Ava wore at the dinner party, but these ones skinnier. Hayden has on a draping tank top that shows off her muscular shoulders and arms. One thing looking over her Instagram feed has shown me is that she's committed to the healthy lifestyle of an elite athlete.

I open the door of my truck for her, holding out a hand if she needs it to climb in. She's wearing high heels. And while she does smile and put her hand in mine, she has no trouble sliding into the truck easily. The other night I had to almost lift Ava into the truck. A day full of allergy medications, blood work, and scratch tests had exhausted her. So then, of course, my brain reminds me of the way she used to grab on to the door panel handle and hop up into the old truck I drove in high school. I push that thought far away. I've dated so few women, especially past the first date, that I'm not sure if this constant comparison is something I've always done or if it's because Ava's been at the forefront of my mind the last couple of weeks.

I try for positive thoughts. Hayden's been easygoing so far. I let out a breath of relief at that as I round the front of the truck to get in.

When we get to the restaurant where Hayden made the reservation, we're led to a table in a back corner. It's upscale, and not exactly a place I frequent, but I can get behind impressing someone on a first date or coming somewhere like this for a special occasion.

We fall into easy conversation about collegiate sports. After the waiter comes to take our orders, Hayden pulls out her phone. "I'm sorry, but it's kind of my job to get a picture of us tonight so I can post later." The grimace I thought I was hiding must have shown because she rushes on. "We don't have to, of course, if you don't want to. I thought it might go a long way to show people the real relationship, that we're dating and getting to know each other and that thing with your ex isn't a big deal." The words spill out faster and faster, and then she laughs, the same nervous one from when I first picked her up.

I force a smile. She's right. That's why Claire said Hayden and I should go out soon. I've already convinced myself I'm going along with Claire's plans, so there's no need to go around and around about it. My stomach twists with a discomfort at using Hayden this way, to spin a story. But she is willing and I do like her… I push the unwelcome thoughts away.

I try to relax and make my smile more genuine. Hayden was fun to talk to at the game, and up until now we've had a good time. Just go with it, Jett. "Right, of course."

Her shoulders fall slightly in relief, and she gets up and sits in the chair next to me. I put my arm on the back of it and lean in toward her. She takes longer than I want angling the phone and adjusting us both for the low light in the restaurant. Long enough that a waiter comes by and asks if we'd like him to take it .

Hayden agrees immediately but then hops up to stand next to him, adjusting how he's holding the phone. I take a deep breath and remind myself that this is Hayden's career. Ironically, Ava's words buzz around in my head. I wouldn't expect the most popular guy in the state to understand the uphill battle Gabriella's facing. I can admit I was unfair about that aspect and that holding a grudge against Hayden for making sure her brand is successful is unfair as well. But I can also admit that it's not my thing.

She drops back into the seat next to me, taking another few seconds to set up her own pose before telling the waiter to take several shots. He hands her phone back, and she thanks him before he walks off.

"Thank you," she says to me. She puts her phone in her purse, and I warm to the fact that even though taking the picture was kind of an ordeal, at least she doesn't flick through the pictures right now to decide which one to use. Or if any were usable. "I know that's annoying," she says with a grimace of her own.

It hits me, memories of all the times someone would stop me and Ava at a restaurant, to talk football with me. Or how patiently she waited after a good game, grinning through interviews I had to do, before she could hug me. Because those interactions are what it took to make my brand successful—to make it to where I am now.

"No problem," I say. "I get it." I hope Hayden hears the truth in my words. So maybe the kind of spotlight she's chosen—a different spotlight than mine—isn't my thing. If I really want to give this the fair shot I told Jenna I was going to, I have to work around those annoyances the same way Ava did all those years ago for me.

By the time I pull up in front of Hayden's house, I've enjoyed our date. Claire was right to encourage me to give things a chance. I put my hand on the door handle to open it after I park so I can go around to get Hayden's door for her, but she lays her hand on my arm and stops me. "Can we talk for just a second?" she asks.

I nod slowly, confused. If she wanted to spend more time together, she could have invited me in, so this feels weird. Is she letting me down easy? My interactions with Ava lately have shown that maybe I come off more judgmentally than I think, and Hayden might have picked up on that. Or she's as bothered as me that despite a real connection between us, this is kind of for publicity.

"Yeah, of course," I say.

She leaves her hand on my arm and scoots a little closer. "I had a really great time tonight. Thank you for doing this. It feels more awkward than our texts and that day at the game, right?"

I nod. "At first, yeah. But I had a great time too."

She squeezes my arm. "I'm glad. That's why I want to get something out of the way right off. I've noticed you and Colby Duncan are pretty close friends, yeah?"

Again I'm thrown by the turn of the conversation. I guess I assumed Hayden would know that when I asked her to be my plus-one to his wedding, but I probably didn't mention that I'm a groomsman and maybe before she just thought I was only going as a teammate. "He's probably one of my best friends." And, besides my brother and his wife, really one of my only close friends. It kind of stings to realize this, especially right now, but it proves that Claire has a point about how my personality has morphed into grumpy.

Hayden grimaces again, and my brain spins at where this is going. Colby is one of the nicest guys on the team, on the field and off. Everyone loves him, so what could the problem be? "So I'm guessing you're probably close with his fiancée, Gabriella Diaz, too?"

"Yeah, pretty close. What's up?" I need Hayden to spill whatever's going on.

"I just want to be completely up front. Some things went down between us right after college, and she might still have feelings about it. I feel horrible about the things I said to her—I was just starting out as an influencer, and I needed a job that she got. But, looking back, I handled everything all wrong. I just don't want that hanging between you and me if we do this again and me wondering what she's said about me or whatever."

Hayden tilts her head at me, worry in her expression and the apology for whatever happened in her voice. I slide my hand down into hers. "Gabriella hasn't said anything to me about you, and if she does, I'll make sure she knows what you said."

She lets out a long breath. "Oh good. I just didn't want you to be surprised if she brought it up, or for it to look like I was hiding something."

"I appreciate the warning." I let my hand linger in hers and ask, "So should we do this again sometime?"

She nods immediately. "We should definitely do it again."