CHAPTER 24 JOLENE

Our second episode dropped two days ago, and it hit the number two spot for sports podcasts this week. I'm thrilled with what we've already accomplished, and training camp is just two weeks away so Ellie has filled both our calendars with charity work that we can spread out through our next few weeks.

It's great since that means I get more public time with Lincoln.

But it also sucks because we're still hiding our real feelings in public.

And I have to be extra careful since Rivera is acting as my boss in my real boss's absence.

It's Friday morning, and I suppose I should've called Jeremy before this moment, but I decided to hold out to see if he'd call first. It's his weekend with Jonah, and the last time we saw him was when he stormed out of the Gridiron two weekends ago.

He answers right away, and he sounds like he's in a much better mood than he was the last time we saw him. Still, alarm bells ring. I don't like the moodiness and the unpredictability of it all.

"Jolene, hi. What can I do for you?"

"I haven't heard from you and just wanted to chat about this weekend," I say, careful with both my words and my tone.

"Right, sure. Listen, I can't talk now but we're excited for Jonah to get here. We have fun plans this weekend."

"We?" I ask.

"Oh, right. I didn't tell you. Alyssa came back. She was mad at me, but we patched things up and we're in a better place now," he says. "I promised not to stay so late at work, and Alyssa promised to be more understanding."

I don't know what to believe. On the one hand, I want it to be true. I want my son to be able to go over and see his dad and not worry about what sort of emotional state his father will be in.

On the other hand…he's not exactly been truthful and forthcoming, so I'm a bit confused.

"That's great," I say. "What are the weekend plans?"

"Wet'n'Wild all day Saturday, and Alyssa scored some aquarium tickets for Sunday," he says, and I'm glad he actually has plans for Jonah while he's there.

"Jonah will love all that," I say.

"So will the girls. And I'm sorry about the Gridiron. I was in a bad place. I should've called to apologize before now."

"Your son is the one who deserves the apology," I say.

"I'll work on it this weekend."

I sigh. I sure hope so.

I text Lincoln to let him know Jonah is going to his dad's place this weekend, and he texts me back to let me know that means I'll be staying with him this weekend.

After his event with Sam tonight, of course.

I can't pretend I'm not thrilled for the chance at some extended alone time with him. We've barely had time to connect outside of the stuff Ellie's got us doing for the podcast, and it's hard enough having a secret affair, but add all these other pressures on top of it and I'm starting to feel the distance looming between us.

I'm just ready for the season to get underway. I'm ready for training camp, and I glance back at the email I received just a few minutes ago from Marcus.

Jolene,

Great news. You were approved to travel with the team to California for training camp. We won't send a camera crew with you but you can take whatever equipment you want with. We'll do a behind the scenes miniseries showcasing camp with a focus on the new coaching staff, rookies, and how the new team is coming together. The Aces should be in touch with your travel arrangements.

Marcus

Two weeks away with the team sounds incredible…but two weeks away from my son sounds like hell.

I'll need to figure out arrangements for Jonah while I'm gone. I know Sam will volunteer to do whatever I need her to do, but it's an awful lot to put on one person.

I sketch out a schedule to propose to my parents first, and then I call my mom. She's on board, so I hold onto my schedule to propose it to Sam after she gets off work tonight but before her event with Lincoln.

I spend the day taking notes on everything I'll need to cover at training camp. Before I know it, my day comes to an end and it's time to head home. Sam's in the kitchen when I walk in.

"How was work?" I ask as I set my bag on the counter and open the fridge to grab something cold to drink.

"Exhausting," she says. "And now this appearance tonight…I feel like I'm constantly on the go lately."

"I feel that," I say, and now I'm starting to feel even more guilty about what I need to ask her. "Do you think we should push forward with the break-up?"

"Probably," she says on a sigh. "I just didn't realize how taxing all the lies were going to be. It's bigger than us, you know? It's Cade. It's Devin. He's a celebrity, so it's all of Vegas, and football fans, and the world."

"Speaking of Devin—" I start, and she cuts me off with a look.

"Let's not speak of Devin please," she begs.

"Okay, okay," I say, holding up both hands placatingly. "But the offer is on the table."

"Look, Lincoln hit the nail on the head, okay? I still love him. I think I might always love him. But what would I say to him? Hi, I know we have a kid together and you just got engaged, but let's give it another go." She shakes her head. "I haven't been willing to bring it up in the five-plus years since we ended things. Why would I do it now that he's happy?"

"Because the stakes have never been higher." I sort of say it like a question even though it's not. "You need to make your feelings known before he gets married and it's too late."

"Or I sweep them under the rug because he's happy and I shouldn't come between him and his fiancée."

She's got a point.

"I just want you to be happy," I say.

"I know you do. And I love you and appreciate you. I just don't have the courage to take the risk, so I'll leave things where they are." She shrugs, but I can tell this is affecting her.

I guess I'm not one to be talking about courage given the fact that I'm secretly sleeping with my family's nemesis.

I walk over and give her a hug. "I'm sorry I've been such a bad friend that we haven't talked about this until now."

"I've been good about hiding my feelings, but since he got engaged, it's just been…hard." She sniffles, and I squeeze her tighter.

"I'm here for the easy stuff and for the hard stuff, babe."

"I know you are. And right back at you. Now I need to go get ready." She pulls back and wipes her face.

"What's tonight's event?" I ask.

"Some nightclub appearance. We have to look like we're having a good time, take some pictures, and then head out. Is Jonah with Jeremy this weekend?"

"Shockingly, yes. He said Alyssa came back and they're taking the kids to a waterpark and an aquarium this weekend."

"She came back?" she asks.

I nod.

"Dummy," she mutters, and I can't help but laugh even though I can't really argue with her on that front.

"I'm just glad Jonah might have some fun over there for a change."

"That's good news for him. How are you handling it?" she asks.

I shrug. "I still hate letting him go over there. I still want to figure out how to cut Jeremy out of our lives completely. But if he's going to make the effort, then I'm happy for Jonah. It's the disappointment on his face every time his father lets him down that really kills me."

"Yeah, I get that," Sam says. It's a different situation entirely since Cade has a great dad in Devin, and I think what kills Sam is the split household when it should be one.

"I found out today I was approved to travel with the Aces to their training camp," I blurt.

Her jaw drops. "For the whole two weeks?"

I nod.

"Oh my God!" she squeals, and that's the reaction I was hoping for.

That's the cheering I needed from my best friend, and a pulse of relief filters through me.

She rushes toward me and pulls me into a giant hug. "I'm so happy for you!" she says when she lets me go. "What can I do?"

"I'll need help with Jonah," I admit. "I can send him to my mom and dad's house if it's easier, but—"

"Stop it. He's already here, and he and Cade are on the same schedule anyway. If he wants to go over there, that's totally fine. But I'm happy to help."

I reach over and squeeze her hand. "You are really the best friend in the entire world."

She chuckles and shoots me a grin. "I know."

Lincoln arrives, and they go to their event. They get into another public argument, and Lincoln spends the night with me at Sam's place since Jonah is at his dad's house.

The next week is a repeat of the same thing except for spending the night together. They go to another event and get into another argument.

Time marches forward, and things just keep getting harder and harder. Marcus is still in Florida but sends communication via email and a weekly zoom call. His mom just had her surgery, and he's going to be there a few more weeks at least. Rivera is mostly staying out of my hair because he's busy managing the entire sports crew…or because he's busy planning something, and I'm nervous about what that might be.

Lincoln and I sneak in moments when we can, we record the podcast, we either go to a restaurant or do some charity work, and we suddenly find ourselves at the last weekend before training camp starts for rookies. He and Sam have another appearance tonight, and I'm feeling particularly down about it.

Lincoln shows up about forty-five minutes before they need to head out, and Sam is still getting ready when I open the door.

He ushers me into my bedroom after I let him in, and his mouth crushes down to mine before I barely even get the word hello out of my mouth.

His tongue batters mine as if he's a starved man searching for his next meal, and suddenly I want to be the meal.

He must be thinking the same thing because he abruptly stops what he's doing. He grabs me into his arms then tosses me on the bed, and he climbs up, settling back onto his knees as he unbuttons my jeans then removes them along with my panties. I sit up and start to unbutton his shirt, my fingers working furiously, and he reaches down and pulls my shirt off then unhooks my bra. I'm naked in record time, and he's still wearing far too many clothes.

He unbuckles his belt as I work his shirt, and once I get to the last button, he stands and pulls it off, tossing it on top of my clothes before he yanks his pants and boxers off.

He's naked, too, and he climbs over me. He hovers there, his cock heavy between my legs as he teases me. He drops his mouth to mine, and I feel his heat over me. He starts to move down my body, trailing kisses in his wake. He stops to suck my nipple into his mouth, and he settles there for a few beats before he trails down, down, down.

He moves his head between my legs, parting my legs wider with his palms, and he presses kisses to my inner thigh before he moves over to my hip. I shiver with anticipation, but as much as I want this, want him, there's something else I want even more.

"I want to taste you," I murmur from where I lay on the bed.

He freezes in his slow pursuit of my pussy, and when his eyes meet mine, there's a wicked gleam there in his. God, he's gorgeous, and I can see the lust there on his face. A needy ache presses between my thighs, and I grab one of my nipples between my fingers.

"Let me suck your dick," I say, and the words surprise even me as his eyes widen with excitement.

He presses a soft kiss to the outside of my pussy, and then he shifts so he's facing the opposite direction as me. I watch his beautiful abs as they shimmer right above my face, and then he poises his cock so it's right above me. I grab it in both fists, and he grunts as I start to stroke the head while I lower my other hand to cup his balls.

"Jesus," he mutters, and then I feel the first flick of his tongue as it makes contact with my clit. My back arches up toward his mouth as I pump his cock a few times, and then I open my mouth and take him in as deep as I can.

He starts to work his hips so he's fucking my mouth, and I keep one fist around the base of his cock while I continue to cup his balls in my other hand.

He growls as he pumps into my mouth, and the growl hums against my pussy that's growing wetter and needier by the second.

His tongue dips inside me before he moves back to my clit. He slips two fingers inside me as he continues to drive his cock in and out of my mouth. I cry out as my fist pumps up and down his shaft with each of his drives, and the vibration of my moans only pulse stronger grunts out of him. It's a push and pull between us, both of us teetering on the edge of something beautiful as he sucks and nips at my clit, his tongue pressing down and speeding up in a perfect rhythm. It takes everything in me not to fall apart. He knows what I want, and he's giving it to me even as he takes what he wants from my mouth, too. It's hot, and it's illicit, and all I can think about is exploding in a violent climax but not wanting this onslaught of pleasure to ever stop.

His licks and sucks turn nearly frantic as he tries to focus on my pleasure, and I'm doing the same to him from below as I take him in and fight against the need to come. I start to suck harder on him as he keeps thrusting into my mouth, and I feel his balls start to draw up just as he hits that magical spot inside me.

I give into the desperate need I feel, and my body falls apart. I keep sucking him as I squeeze my hand around the base of his cock. I arch into him, and that's when he starts to come, too. He lets out a ferocious roar as I feel the hot streams of come ooze out of him and hit the back of my throat. I swallow with his cock still inside my mouth as we both come at the same time. My hips jerk up to meet his glorious tongue, and he pulls some of those beautiful inches out of my mouth to give me space to breathe again.

He pumps into my mouth a few more times just as my body starts to calm, and then he moves off me and turns around, collapsing beside me with one arm draped over my stomach. He lifts a hand to rest it on my breast.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs.

"For what?"

"For not giving you some warning. But fuck, Jo, between how good your cunt tastes and hearing those moans and fucking your mouth, it snuck up on me." He sounds a little sheepish even as he talks quietly.

"I knew it was coming, and I wouldn't have wanted a warning," I admit. "I love that we're so in sync that our bodies let go at the same time."

He squeezes my breast under his palm. "I love you."

I breathe out a satisfied sigh before I say it back to him.

We lay together for another few minutes before he finally shifts a little. "I need to leave soon. You got any mouthwash?"

I giggle as I nod toward the bathroom. "Help yourself."

He forces himself up out of my bed, and goosebumps immediately rise up on my skin from the chill he leaves in his wake.

Only, I don't think it's because I'm cold. I think it has more to do with the fact that he's leaving so he can take another woman that isn't me out for the evening.

I'm supposed to be okay with this. It was partially my idea, after all. I agreed to it.

But it still stings every damn time, and I'm not sure how we ever move past this phase of our relationship and onto the next one.