Chapter Eight

December 24, 1819

Christmas Eve Day

“Psst, Henry!” Gabriel gestured to his son from the butler’s pantry that rested between the dining room and the morning room.

“Papa?” The young man frowned as he came across the corridor from the drawing room. With a glance about, he soon joined Gabriel in the small space. “What are you doing in here? I was about to enjoy tea, and I hope Cook includes some of her little mince pies. I’ve waited all year for those.”

“And you’ll be able to have them soon, but I desperately need to talk with you.” Ushering his son further into the butler’s pantry, he then slid the pocket door closed. “Mary continues to ask me questions regarding my absences and why I’m not being truthful with her.”

It had been quite trying. Last night once they’d come home following their evening at Vauxhall Gardens and the sleigh ride through Mayfair, he’d wanted to recapture the passion they’d embarked upon while in the gardens, but Mrs. Pearson came and found him, told him there was an emergency she needed him for, and he’d had no choice but to part from Mary for a bit.

Charlie had apparently gotten himself stuck in a part of the root cellar after exploring, and since Mrs. Pearson couldn’t pull him out, Gabriel had to lend a hand. By the time he’d returned to the shared suite with Mary, she was asleep.

Another missed opportunity, and another reason why she probably mistrusted him.

He rubbed a hand along the side of his face. “I’m not certain Mary is going to be pleased with this little surprise.” Or she’d run him out of the house by Christmas dinner. “Things between us are ready to erupt into chaos.”

“Papa, stop. Mary loves you enormously, and you deserve every happiness in your life. I rather doubt she could ever come to hate you.” Still, Henry frowned. “Christmas is tomorrow. You have one more day to keep the secret. And just think, after that, you’ll be so happy you’ll pop with pride.”

“I don’t know. Seeing the disappointment and doubt in her eyes is fracturing my heart.”

“You are almost there.” Henry laid a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder as he held his gaze. “You are putting together a new little family. Keep that in mind, and imagine the joy on Mary’s face when you finally reveal all. Even I can’t object to this scheme. It will be more than worth the few days of being uncomfortable in her presence, hmm?”

“I suppose.” Though he couldn’t shake the feelings of glumness. Then he frowned as Henry’s words sank into his addled brain. “ Do you have objections?”

“I do not.” His son’s grin was this side of cheeky. “I adore Mary. Having her in your life has made you into a much better man. She has been good for you—good for us. We needed someone to ground us, to bring us back together after everything that happened in the past.” Slowly, his grin faded, and his expression reflected a somberness not usually seen. “There was a time when I thought you and I were far too different to find common ground, but then Mary came along, and she made me see things from your point of view.”

“Oh.” With a bit of shock, Gabriel looked at his son, this young man newly turned three and twenty who hoped to be a barrister and forge an honest life for himself without relying on family coin. Damn, but he was proud of him. “Mary has a habit of improving everything she touches, doesn’t she?”

“She does, so don’t worry about your relationship. All will be well.”

He snorted. “She fears I’m either working a case without her or have taken a mistress. It matters not how many times I’ve tried to relieve her concerns. Just when I think I’m making progress, something comes along to unravel it.”

“Oh, Papa.” A chuckle escaped his son. “Why is it that a woman’s mind always jumps to the conclusion of a mistress or another woman?”

“When you’ve had a past as she has, I can’t say I blame her. Beyond that, she and I don’t keep secrets from each other.” Every day that went by, he died a little inside because he couldn’t tell her the truth. “It’s killing me to do this.”

“It’s understandable with how close the two of you are, but it’s for Christmastide. She will understand.”

“I hope so.” He shoved a hand through his hair. “I’ll be glad when I don’t need to keep sneaking down to the kitchens to check on the boy. Mary’s liable to toss my arse into the gutter soon.”

Again, Henry laughed. “Then you need to do a better job of keeping her distracted.” He winked. “Use your charm on her.”

“I’ve tried. Why, last night I took her to Vauxhall Gardens and had a romantic night, which was interrupted by Charlie getting into mischief.” Heat traveled up the back of his neck when he remembered how good she’d felt in his arms while they’d walked those darkened paths. “I suppose I’ve done a piss poor job of keeping my love for her to a minimum, and in doing so, have made you feel uncomfortable. But once a man finds the right woman for his life…”

“There is no need to explain it to me.” Henry rested a hip against a sideboard in the narrow room. “And why should you hide what you feel? It’s wonderful to see you sharing emotion and showing your affection for a woman.” He shrugged. “I know things with you and Mama were horrid at best. And seeing you so happy now gives me hope for my own romance.”

“With Miss Davenport?” One of his eyebrows rose in question. “So you truly fancy her, then?”

It was Henry’s turn to squirm, for a ruddy flush went up his neck and above his cravat. “I’m not certain, but I do know I’m uncomfortable, confused, and uncommonly witless when I’m in her company.” His eyes took on a dreamy quality in the illumination from the single candle burning on a small table. “I told you that she’s a pianist.”

“You did.”

“Well, when I first saw her perform a few weeks ago, she stopped me literally in my tracks. I was in the corridor outside the room, and the lovely notes from her playing brought me into the recital room instead of going to the card room with my friends.” He shrugged again and gave Gabriel a wry grin. “She is a good sort, but is quiet. I can’t quite tell if she’s shy or if she’s intimidated by me. And…”

“And?” Seeing his son so excited and ready to cast up his accounts was amusing.

“I want a relationship like you share with Mary. It’s breathtaking and wonderful. Don’t ever be ashamed of that, for you inspire more people than you probably know.”

“Such gammon, but the praise is appreciated.” He grinned. How interesting it was that his children were now teaching him these days. “Do you have anything scheduled for the next couple of hours?”

“No, why?”

“We need to go out and secure a tree like they have in the Bavarian region. I think Mary and Cassandra will appreciate that, and once they decorate it, the spirit of the holiday will indeed be upon us.”

“Ah, and if that serves as a good distraction, all the better for you, hmm?”

“You are quite right, of course.” He couldn’t wait to give the girls their surprise. “I’m told that sometimes people put little presents or tokens for their loved ones beneath it.” With a grin, he slowly slid open the pocket door. “I’ll have to wrap the presents we bought and stick them beneath the branches.”

“You are quite something, Papa.” Henry’s grin was as wide as his own. “I have never seen you so excited for something. Unless you count when you wished to propose to Mary.”

“Yes, well, that was both exciting and vomit-inducing. Much the same as what you feel in Miss Davenport’s company.” He snorted with laughter as he and his son made their way along the corridor toward the stairs. “Can I help it if everything in my life has suddenly come to fruition over the past year? That is cause to celebrate, hmm?”

“It is. You are adorable.” He nudged Gabriel’s elbow with his. “I hope Cassandra and Charlie will come to love you as I do and find security and happiness knowing you are their father.”

“Ah.” That humbled him and drew his steps to a halt at the banister. “You are certain you aren’t jealous I have this second family?” He’d never wish to do anything that made his son feel less than.

“Don’t be a nodcock.” Henry clapped a hand to Gabriel’s shoulder. “You are a wonderful father, and there is no reason why you can’t be that to children who need a papa in their lives.” He nodded, and there was nothing but honesty in his expression. “Besides, it will be a novelty and a bit of fun to have siblings. I can teach them all sorts of bad habits and ways to vex you.”

They shared a laugh that was both cathartic and encouraging.

“I don’t mind telling you I am thrilled. Much of your early childhood was fraught with anxiety and horrid things in my mind as well as my work. I’m sorry I wasn’t who you might have needed at the time, but that doesn’t mean I’m not here for you now.”

“Do stop, Papa.” Henry blew out a breath as they continued down the stairs. “You did the best you could in the situation, but I’m proud of who you are and who I am because of you.” He gave a nod. “You managed to survive where other men wouldn’t have. You have always stood for what is right and true. Don’t discount that. I certainly appreciate it. You have shown me what a true gentleman is and how they should act. In essence, that dark time has given us a second chance at our relationship.”

“Do you truly believe that?”

“I do.”

Gabriel nodded. “Thank you for telling me. I often find myself racked with guilt about your childhood and those years when your mother made our lives a living nightmare.” But that was in their past. There were much better things in their future. “I’m glad you and I are in here in this moment, and that we’re good friends.”

“So am I, and for what it’s worth, I can’t wait until tomorrow. It’s going to be a lovely day.” He grinned again as they reached the entry hall. “There is no place I would rather be than here in this townhouse with you and Mary and Cassandra. It’s just such a welcoming place.” As he accepted his greatcoat from the footman, he gasped. “Can we please bring Cassandra with us on this errand? She would think it the greatest fun, and imagine her delight in picking out the perfect tree.”

How could he deny his son anything? “If you don’t mind.”

“Mind? How could I? The girl is funny and quite clever. She might be delicate, but there is a spine of steel there that might prove stubborn for you in the future.” He took the top hat from the footman. “I’ll meet you in the carriage. It shouldn’t take long for me to grab Cassie and bring her outside.”

“And if Mary objects?” His son’s excitement transferred to him.

“I’ll simply buss her cheek, give her an exaggerated compliment, tell her I’ve bought her a present for tomorrow, and then grin. Isn’t that what you do?” With a wink, Henry loped along the corridor and then at the stairs, took the treads two at a time, calling for Cassandra as he went.

Bemused, Gabriel donned his own greatcoat. He looked at the footman, who snickered. “I guess Christmastide makes everyone a bit mad at times, doesn’t it?”