30. I Can’t Lose You Again

CHAPTER 30

I Can't Lose You Again

A high-pitched, agonized cry pulled Ryker from his dreams. His eyes flung open, and he jolted upright with a gasp. His magic was a storm in his veins, and his heart hammered in his chest.

Instinct had his gaze swinging to his left to check on Brynleigh.

His heart nearly stopped.

She was sitting straight up, the sheet pooling at her naked waist. Her fists were clutched over her heart, her face was as pale as snow, and she was drawing in air as though she'd been drowning. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and sobs racked her body.

Ryker whispered her name, his voice low as though he were addressing a wounded animal, not the strong vampire he'd been losing himself in hours ago.

Her black eyes were unseeing, staring at the wall.

"It's okay," he murmured, reaching for her slowly so as not to scare her. "It was a nightmare." At least, he hoped it was just a nightmare. "I'm just going to hold you. Is that alright?"

Taking a vampire by surprise, especially one who seemed to be in a bad mental state, would never be a good idea.

Several seconds went by before she dipped her chin .

It was the slightest movement, but it was all he needed.

Wrapping his arms around Brynleigh, Ryker drew her against him. She seemed so much smaller than she had when they were together earlier. She trembled, tears dampening his chest as her cheek pressed over his heart.

"I've got you," he whispered, kissing her forehead. "I won't let you go."

And he didn't.

Her shaking, gasping breaths continued for what felt like forever but was probably just a few minutes.

Ryker held his wife and rubbed her back, murmuring about nothing in particular. He didn't care if he had to hold her all day; he would do it without question.

What had Brynleigh dreamed about that left her in such a state? She hadn't even been this broken when he got her from The Pit.

He leaned back, still holding her against his chest, and looked out the window.

The sun was high; the yellowed rays tinted slightly gray by the special windowpanes he'd had installed. They'd stayed up until the early hours of the dawn, so it wasn't surprising that they'd slept well into the day.

After several minutes had passed, Brynleigh's breathing slowed. She lifted her chin and sniffled. "I couldn't stop her."

Worry creased his brows. "Stop who?"

Brynleigh drew in another shuddering breath and laced her hand through his.

"Jelisette," she whispered, the word painfully quiet.

In the silence of their bedroom—because there was no doubt in his mind, this bedroom was theirs after last night—it was like she shouted her Maker's name.

He tensed despite his efforts to stay calm.

Of fucking course, this had something to do with Brynleigh's insane Maker.

It took everything he had not to growl as he asked, "What did she do? "

"She… oh, gods." Another shuddering sob ripped through his vampire, and fresh tears flowed down her cheeks. "She chased me through a forest, staked me, and killed me. I mean… I thought…"

Ryker couldn't take it anymore. Witnessing his wife's suffering was like watching someone rip his heart to shreds in front of him.

Keeping one arm wrapped around her, he put the other beneath her chin and tilted it up. "It was a nightmare."

Brynleigh nodded. "I know, but…"

He brushed his lips over her cheeks, kissing away her salty tears. "But what?"

"But it felt so fucking real." She rubbed her chest, drawing in deep breaths. "I thought that was it for us, Ryker. I really did. She was so angry."

"I hate her," he said vehemently.

He hated her more than anyone else in the entire world.

"Me too."

They sat in silence for several minutes before those eyes that he loved so dearly rose to meet his.

"Do you know what my last thought was before she staked me?"

He shook his head. "No."

"You." Brynleigh brushed her fingers down his cheek. "I was sorry that we didn't get more time. That hurt more than anything else. More than the stake she drove into my heart. More than the fear and pain of death. The knowledge that we had just found each other again and now were being torn apart was agonizing."

Ryker's heart broke at the pain in her voice."I'm so sorry, sweetheart."

Long minutes passed.

"Me too. It was a nightmare, but the fear… I can't lose you again, Ry." The vulnerability in her words shot straight to his heart. "I love you, and I need you like I need blood. When I first fell in love with you, I was frightened. I didn't understand what was happening. But now… now I know I was finding the other half of my soul."

Ryker's chest warmed. He'd never known love like this existed. He'd experienced familial love, but that was incomparable to the way he felt about Brynleigh. Even when the divide between them had felt insurmountable, his need for her remained.

"I love you, too," he murmured.

Her eyes locked onto his, and his breath caught in his throat.

Ryker wasn't sure who moved first, only that they both did. He bent his head, and she raised her chin. A heartbeat later, their mouths fused in a burning embrace. She shifted, clasping his arms, and he swept his tongue across her mouth.

Gods, he wanted her again.

"Don't ever leave me," Brynleigh gasped against his lips.

He shook his head, kissing her. "Not even death will separate us."

If that ever happened, he would bridge that divide, too.

"Promise?" she asked.

He flipped them and nudged her thighs open with his knee. Slipping a hand between them, he growled at the wetness that greeted him.

Removing his fingers, he fitted himself at her entrance.

"I swear it." He thrust inside her, letting her heat envelop his cock. She groaned, and he caught the sound with his lips. Gods, she was perfect. "You are mine. Forever."

And then he showed her exactly what it meant to belong to him.

Several hours later, they finally extricated themselves from the bedroom. Ryker and Marlowe ran to Eleyta Park while Brynleigh showered. Even though he knew it was ridiculous, part of him felt sad about being separated from her for that short time.

Every minute of his run, he thought about their relationship—where they'd started and how far they'd come—and his love for her. It shocked him how much he cared about her, yet he wouldn't have it any other way.

When he and Marlowe returned, Brynleigh was in a chair by the window. Her hair hung in blonde waves down her back, and she hugged her legs to herself as she sipped a mug of warm blood.

Ryker unhooked the dog's leash and walked towards her. Brushing away her hair, he kissed the back of her neck .

"What are you looking at?" he murmured.

She glanced over her shoulder and smiled. He'd never get enough of that.

"The sun," she replied.

"It is beautiful."

Not too hot, nor too cold. Today was a wonderful fall day.

She sighed contentedly, resting her head against him as he placed his hand on her shoulder. "I missed it so much."

"Now you can watch it every day."

They looked out the glass for several minutes in companionable silence before Brynleigh hummed.

"This was the moment I knew I was done for." She raised a brow and met his gaze. "Did I ever tell you that?"

Ryker shook his head. He would've remembered something like that.

She chuckled, trailing a finger down the windowpane.

"I walked in here expecting to hate you. Fucking determined to hate you. I tried so gods-damned hard, Ryker. I needed you to be evil. To be the one who hurt me. And you… you made it impossible."

"I was already in love with you," he admitted, staring at the afternoon sun. "I think I loved you the moment I went to look for you after the rebel attack."

Even then, he'd been ready to give her everything. His soul had known they were meant to be.

She put down her mug and stood, taking his hand in hers. Her thumb swept over the back of his palm, and she leaned against him.

"You were amazing, Ry. You were kind, considerate, funny, and competitive—nothing like what I expected. And I… I fell for you. When I saw the sun, I knew I was yours. And then later that night when River…" Her voice trailed off, and she winced.

"When she told you about the storm," he finished softly.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I knew it was over for me. I couldn't do it."

Ryker wrapped his arms around Brynleigh and held her close. What would've happened if River hadn't told her the truth about the Incident?

He didn't even want to think about it .

But it was over now. They were together, and their life was shaping up to be something beautiful.

Clearing his mind of the past, Ryker focused on the stunning woman in his arms. Together, they studied the city. Even Marlowe was quiet, his soft snores rising from his favorite spot on the couch.

Several minutes passed before Ryker remembered the envelope he'd gotten yesterday.

"Hold on." He kissed her forehead and stepped back, grabbing the letter from where he'd left it and returning to her side. "This came for us."

She ran her fingers over the front.

"Mr. and Mrs. Waterborn," she murmured, lifting her gaze to his. "I like the sound of that."

"Me too." He kissed her because he couldn't seem to help himself. "Want to open it?"

The smile Brynleigh shot in his direction could have warmed even the darkest souls.

She carefully opened the envelope, revealing a smaller gilded letter. The size of a postcard, it slipped into her palm with ease.

The invitation was almost identical to the one Ryker had first gotten to confirm his place in the Choosing. Mere months had passed since then, yet it felt like centuries ago.

On the front, scrawling black letters read, You're Invited!

Brynleigh hummed and turned it around. Written in the same cursive as the front was an invitation to the Reunion, set to take place a week from today.

"There you go. Seven days." She tapped her index finger on the edge of the envelope for a long moment before looking up at him.

"All the pieces are falling into place. You do your army thing,"—she spun a finger in the air like a little tornado, which he found ridiculously endearing—"and I'll work on the rebels. We'll trap them before they harm anyone else, putting a stop to this once and for all."

She sounded so sure. So confident.

Ryker admired and loved that about her, but unease crawled up the back of his neck. Would it truly be that simple? He hoped so.

He wanted nothing more than to put this entire portion of their lives behind them when the Reunion was over. He wanted to bring Brynleigh to his cabin and spend weeks enjoying life by the lake. He wanted long nights in front of the chess board, playing—and winning—against her.

He wanted laughter, joy, and peace, and he wouldn't stop until they'd achieved that.

It was so close that he could practically taste it.