Chapter 26

brADY

SIX YEARS AGO

Returning to Vegas after spending the last few months at the University of Wisconsin was like entering a new world. I sighed with relief when I felt that blast of hot desert air outside the airport. Back in Wisconsin, it’d just snowed ten inches and was below zero. My roommates had bitched and moaned that I’d gotten to go back home to the desert.

“Brady!” Mr. Dallas gave me a hug when I came into the living room. Mrs. Dallas did the same, patting me on the arm.

“Where’s Ben and Grace?” I asked, trying to sound casual.

Mr. Dallas huffed. “Grace is out with a friend.” When Mrs. Dallas shot her husband a wry look, Mr. Dallas sighed. “Okay, boyfriend. She has a boyfriend. Happy? I said the word out loud.”

I’d had no idea that Grace was dating somebody. Last I heard, she’d been too focused on studying for her SATs to get involved with anybody.

“And Ben ...” Mr. Dallas shrugged. “Where did he go, anyway?”

“He went to the store to get some things for dinner,” Mrs. Dallas said crisply. She turned to me and rolled her eyes. “You know what the secret of success to any marriage is? Listening to your wife when she tells you to pick up stuff from the store before it’s the day before Christmas Eve.”

Mr. Dallas just grumbled to himself. Mrs. Dallas gave me another pat on the arm and went into the kitchen, telling me we’d catch up soon.

I hadn’t planned on coming back to the Dallases’ for Christmas break. I’d gone to a teammate’s house for Thanksgiving, considering how long the flight was. But when Mrs. Dallas had heard that I’d been planning to spend my Christmas on campus, she’d put up such a fuss that I’d given in and come.

It didn’t help that I didn’t want to see Grace. Something about that girl never failed to mess me up inside. Despite hooking up with a few different girls at UW, I still couldn’t forget Grace.

It was fucking annoying, like a virus I couldn’t shake.

“Did you hear the good news?” said Mr. Dallas as he sat on his favorite leather chair. “I thought Elise told you. Well, it doesn’t matter. I got a coaching job for the LA Blades. We’re moving there in three months, if we can’t sell this place sooner.”

I sat down across from Mr. Dallas. “Seriously? That’s amazing.”

The Blades were one of the best teams in the NHL. They were also my favorite team. I followed them religiously, watching every game. I could name all the players’ stats, to the point that my teammates at UW made fun of me for it.

“Thanks, son. I’m pretty excited myself.” Mr. Dallas nodded happily. “Now, the missus isn’t thrilled about moving, but we’ll manage. It doesn’t help that LA is so damn expensive.”

“Well, you’ll be making good money, won’t you?”

Mr. Dallas grinned. “You bet I will be.”

“And maybe I’ll be one of your draft picks in a few years.” I said the words lightly even though internally, I was all nerves.

Mr. Dallas assessed me. “You might be right on that one. But we’ll see what happens. Things can change. Besides, you might end up being drafted to a Midwest team closer to Wisconsin, especially if you like the place.”

“And freeze my balls off? No, thanks.”

Mr. Dallas chuckled. “I’m surprised you haven’t died out there yet. Did you figure out how to drive in the snow yet? You know, it’s driving on ice that’s the worst. I did it once when I was in Maine for a business meeting, and I nearly shit myself as I did a one-eighty on a highway.”

“What in the world are you talking about?” Mrs. Dallas asked. She then beckoned to me. “Brady, I could use your help.”

I nodded, knowing full well that Mrs. Dallas was the one who ran this family. Even Mr. Dallas wasn’t brave enough to say no to his wife.

“Now, help me with these dinner rolls. You remember how to fold them, right?” she said.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Well, I’m excited to hear all about your first semester of college. A lot has changed around here, too. I’m sure Mr. Dallas told you about his new job.” Mrs. Dallas sighed. “I’m sad to sell this house. We’ve lived here since the kids were small. But it’s such an amazing opportunity. Besides, Grace will be going to college here soon, so we’ll be empty nesters.”

“How is Ben?” I asked even though I really wanted to ask about his sister again.

“Oh, he’s great. He’ll be here later tonight. He and his old high school friends are having a bonfire down by the lake. You should go, if you want to. I know you just got here, though.”

“He’s not coming home for dinner?” I looked at the piles of food that Mrs. Dallas was preparing.

She laughed. “This is for tomorrow. Well, most of it is. Some of this is for tonight. I might’ve gone a little overboard, but I was excited to have all my kids back home.”

I smiled, pleased at her words. Although I’d been reluctant to come back home for Christmas, I was glad I had. It would’ve been depressing to wander around the deserted campus while everybody else went off to celebrate with their families.

“And Grace should be home soon. She’s with her new boyfriend, Sean. He seems like a nice boy. We’ve only met him twice,” said Mrs. Dallas as she stirred a pot on the stove.

I gritted my teeth. Well, Grace must’ve gotten over her crush on me. I wondered whether this was the same guy I’d seen her kissing at the movie theater a year ago.

“Does she know where she’ll apply for college?” I asked, needing to change the subject.

“Oh, she has a whole list. I’d love it if she could go to UCLA or USC so she’d be close by, but she might end up staying here to go to UNLV. As far as I know, she wants to stay west of the Rocky Mountains.”

Ben was attending the University of Vermont, both for their hockey team and because, as he’d told me, he wanted to get as far away from his parents as possible. Ben had always found his parents rather overinvolved in his life. To me, they’d just seemed like parents who actually gave a shit about their kids, unlike my own parents.

After Mrs. Dallas thanked me for my help, I decided to go for a swim. At my last game, I’d gotten rammed by a huge dude, and my shoulder was still feeling the hit. After changing into my trunks, I waded into the pool.

I couldn’t help but remember when Grace had taught me to swim in this very pool. I’d been such a lost, angry kid back then. It was a wonder that a young girl like Grace had been brave enough to talk to me, let alone teach me to swim.

And now Ben, Grace, and I had all gone our separate ways. I wondered if the Dallases would keep asking me to come back after I’d graduated from college. Or would our connection slowly fade away, and we’d only exchange a phone call once or twice a year going forward?

But then again, if I actually did get drafted by the Blades, I’d still be in their lives. Which also meant I could keep tabs on Grace.

I shook my head and dove under the water. I did a few laps, trying to clear my head.

“Brady! Braaaady!”

I stood in the shallow end of the pool to see Grace waving at me.

Not only waving at me but also wearing the tiniest bikini I’d ever seen. My jaw nearly dropped. I couldn’t believe her parents would let her wear something like that.

“I didn’t know you’d be home already,” she said, smiling.

God, she looked fucking amazing. Her blond hair was longer than I’d ever seen it. It blew gently in the wind as she stood over me. Her body was tan and lithe, her breasts small but firm. Even worse, she had freckles all over her cheeks and shoulders. I was a complete sucker for freckles.

I forced myself to stop staring at her. “Yeah, I’m back,” I said weakly.

“Wow, you sound thrilled.” Grace jumped into the pool, making sure to splash me. “Come on, toss me!”

She threw herself into my arms like we were little kids. I froze, mostly because there was no place to put my hands that didn’t feel inappropriate. I lightly clasped her around the waist and tried to toss her as far as I could.

Grace laughed and launched herself at me again. This time, she tried to climb onto my shoulders, but I wouldn’t let her.

“You’re too heavy,” I groused.

She didn’t seem offended. “God, you’re so boring now.” She splashed me, trying to start a water fight. “Since when did you turn into such a grumpy old man?”

I wasn’t going to fall for her bait. I knew she was trying to get a rise out of me.

Well, she was—just not the rise she was expecting.

I forced myself to think of icebergs to stop my traitorous dick from betraying me. Grace, though, wasn’t helping. All her jumping and swimming just served to show off her body. Everything about her was so bouncy .

It was painful to watch her.

Finally, I got out of the pool after Grace tried one last time to get me to toss her.

She surfaced, frowning. “Where are you going?”

“I have to be somewhere. Sorry.”

I knew I was being an asshole, but I didn’t care. I almost sprinted upstairs to my old room and locked the door. There, I dried off, got dressed, and got out of the house before any of the other Dallases stopped me.

I spent the rest of the afternoon and evening at the rink. When Mrs. Dallas called to ask if I’d be home for dinner, I lied and said I was meeting up with old friends. I felt guilty, mostly because I knew she’d been expecting me to eat with the family.

But I couldn’t be around Grace. She posed too much of a temptation.

I managed to get back into the Dallases’ house without Grace noticing. I took a shower, sweaty after skating for so long, and was about to return to my room when the bathroom door opened.

“Shit, somebody’s in here!” I yelled. I must’ve forgotten to lock it.

Grace, though, wasn’t deterred. She stepped inside the steamy bathroom and shut the door behind her. She took in my appearance—I only had a towel wrapped around my hips—and I could see a blush creeping up her cheeks.

“Uh, if you need the bathroom, I’m almost done,” I said.

She shook her head. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“And coming into the bathroom was your best idea? You should go to your room.”

If Mr. or Mrs. Dallas realized Grace was in here with me and I was basically naked, they’d kill me. I was about to make Grace leave when she said, “I want you to take my virginity.”

I dropped the razor I was holding and stared at her reflection in the mirror. Had I heard her correctly?

“What the fuck?” I growled, turning around.

Grace lifted her chin. “You heard me.”

“Are you drunk? High? Get out of here. And don’t you have a boyfriend?” I was horrified. I was ... aroused. I didn’t know where to fucking look.

“I realized tonight that Sean isn’t who I want. He’s a boy.” Grace stepped closer, nearly touching me now. “You’re a man.”

Oh God. Fucking, fucking hell. Was this some kind of erotic dream? It had to be. There was no other way this could be happening.

“You’re insane,” I said hoarsely.

“You’re not saying no, either.”

We gazed at each other, the tension building. My body was on fire. Grace was so close; it’d be easy to kiss her. I leaned toward her, my lips nearly brushing hers—

I heard something. Someone coughing? But it was enough to make me jump away. I had to grab my towel so I didn’t flash Grace.

“This isn’t happening,” I said, turning back to the mirror.

Grace’s expression was mulish now. But when she seemed to realize I was serious, she deflated. “We’ll see,” she said and finally left the bathroom.

I let out the breath I’d been holding once the door clicked shut. I locked it quickly, terrified that Grace would try something else.

Terrified? Or excited? I didn’t know the answer anymore. I was panting like I’d been running. Desperate, I hopped back into an ice-cold shower to get my brain in order.

After asking Mrs. Dallas if I could take her car, I headed off to the bonfire Ben was attending. There was no fucking way I could stay in that house tonight. Not with Grace about to beat my door down.

I couldn’t believe she’d done that. Had she seriously asked me to take her virginity? She’d lost her mind.

Had somebody dared her? Now I wondered whether the whole thing hadn’t just been a prank. I gritted my teeth, anger rising inside. If it had been a joke, Grace had seemed completely serious.

I pushed all thoughts of Grace aside when I got to the lake. It was easy to find the party. About thirty people were hanging around, and the huge bonfire was bright in the desert night. A few people recognized me and said hello, asking me how college was going.

I found Ben on a log by himself. It didn’t seem like he was drinking, unlike everybody else.

“Brady,” said Ben, smiling. He got up and gave me a hug. “Nice to see you, man.”

“Same.” I grabbed a beer from a nearby cooler. “Want one?”

“Sure.”

We drank in companionable silence for a bit before we started talking about college, hockey, and any other interesting updates. Ben told me all about his last hockey game and how his team had lost to their rivals. He seemed depressed about it.

“I can’t believe I missed that goal,” he said, shaking his head. “Fucking rookie mistake.”

I decided not to mention how my team had just won their latest game. It seemed like rubbing salt into the wound. Instead, I told Ben all about Wisconsin and a few of the crazy fraternity parties I’d attended.

After we’d finished our beers, I went to talk with a few hockey guys I’d played with back in high school. An hour later, we were reminiscing about our high school days when Ben came over.

“How did you get here, anyway?” Ben asked.

“Your mom let me borrow her car. Why?”

“Oh, good. I need to use it for a beer run.”

I hesitated, but then shrugged. Ben wasn’t the type to drink and drive. He’d had only one beer, as far as I knew.

“Here,” I said, handing him the keys.

“Thanks. I owe you one.”

When people started going home, I decided to catch a ride with Jordan, one of my friends from high school. He lived nearby to the Dallases. I texted Ben, wondering whether he’d just decided to go home, too. Or maybe he’d decided to go to another party.

Ben had always been like that. He tended to fly by the seat of his pants. As teenagers, we’d party-hopped on weekends. Sometimes we’d end up in the most random places and houses, making me wonder how Ben had even heard that this random house in the middle of nowhere was going to have a huge party.

I was tired, not paying attention to what Jordan was saying, when Jordan slowed his car down. In front of us was a huge group of fire trucks, police cars, and ambulances, their emergency lights bright against the night sky.

“Damn, what happened?” Jordan said, craning his neck. “The entire highway is blocked.”

“I think we might have to turn around,” I said.

“No, they have somebody directing traffic.” Jordan pointed.

We were slowly making our way through the maze of vehicles when we passed by the wreck. We both looked, of course, and I grimaced when I saw the car was basically wrapped around a tree. I had a feeling whoever had been in the car wouldn’t have made it.

As I looked more closely, though, I noticed a decal on the back left bumper: a red hibiscus from Hawaii. It was a decal Mrs. Dallas had gotten when the family had gone to Hawaii a year ago.

I froze, time seeming to crawl to a standstill. “Pull over!” I yelled at Jordan.

“What the hell? Why?”

Jordan hadn’t even fully stopped the car when I jumped out. I jogged over to a police officer. He held up his hands, scowling at me.

“Son, this is an active scene. Get out of here,” said the cop.

I didn’t listen to him. I just ran toward the car, ignoring the cop’s shout. Right then, somebody raised their flashlight to illuminate the back of the car.

On the bumper was the decal I’d recognized. And most definitive of all was another sticker, this one that said PROUD HOCKEY MOM.

“What happened?” I asked. I whirled around. “What happened?”

“Some kid was drinking and wrapped his car around the tree. He didn’t make it,” said the cop.

I fell to my knees.

Ben. Oh God, Ben.

What have I done?