Chapter 23

brADY

I went for a drive alone after Mom’s funeral. Grace had been hesitant to let me be by myself, but I’d insisted.

I needed time to think. Although Grace’s presence gave me a lot of comfort, a part of me still needed to be away from her.

Maybe because I felt guilty for involving her in this. What right had I to drag her into my life drama?

Only a few people had been able to attend Mom’s funeral. Marty had given me a brief hug, telling me how sorry he was. I met a few of Mom’s fellow AA members who’d known her for a long time.

But there weren’t any other family members to attend. Mom’s parents had died a long time ago, and she’d been estranged from her two siblings since before I’d been born. My dad was God knows where. After he’d gotten out of prison, he’d disappeared. For all I knew, he was dead, too.

Grace had stood next to me throughout the service. She’d greeted the few attendees, chatting with them all, besides helping me arrange everything. She’d been my rock through the entire process.

She’d asked me whether I’d wanted her parents to attend, but I’d declined. I didn’t want Coach Dallas’s pitying glances or Elise’s sympathetic hugs. I knew they’d mean well, but they were just a reminder of the parents I never had.

So now I was driving on the outskirts of Vegas, the desert sun bright and blinding, the afternoon heat cloying. I didn’t have a destination in mind. But when I drove up to the Dallases’ old house, I couldn’t be surprised at myself.

It was a charming two-story house with white shutters and a small porch. It looked much the same as when the Dallases had sold it, except for the landscaping. The new owners had gotten rid of the grass and had planted all kinds of succulents instead. I smiled, thinking of how much pride Coach had put into that damn lawn. He’d flip a lid if he knew these owners had torn up his precious sod.

There was a small park across the street. I went to sit on a bench under a tree, staring at the house I’d loved so much and thinking about the family who’d taken me in when I’d needed them.

The Dallases had shaped me in ways that could never be repaid. They’d supported my hockey career and had always made me feel like one of their family members. Even though Coach would never support me dating his daughter, I didn’t resent him for it.

Because he knew I wasn’t good enough for his daughter, something that I was also aware of. But my problem was that I couldn’t stay away from Grace despite my best efforts.

I thought of what Grace had said last night, that I loved her. And I realized at that moment that I did love her, and I couldn’t let her go. I didn’t have the strength. Losing Mom made me realize that life was too short to be alone. If we had only a few weeks or months together, it’d be worth it.

I knew I’d disappoint the Dallases if I stayed on this path. That thought almost made me want to change my mind. But what I felt for Grace was stronger than the fear of their disapproval.

I sat on the bench and watched as a family went inside the house. They were a young family with two kids, it seemed. That made me happy. I liked the thought of the house being filled with love and laughter again.

I got up and went to their front door, hesitating for just a second. Then I knocked on their door and waited.

The evening after the funeral, I returned to the hotel to get Grace. When I told her I wanted to show her something, she didn’t protest. She just nodded and got into the car.

It didn’t take her long to figure out where we were going. When we stopped in front of her old house, she seemed happy and confused.

“Let’s go to the tree house,” I said.

Her eyes widened. “Uh, I think that would be trespassing.”

“Don’t worry. The owners told me it would be okay. They’re out at a barbecue tonight anyway.”

Grace looked skeptical but then told me that if we got arrested, she’d blame me entirely. I smiled for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

I took her hand and guided her to the backyard.

“Oh lord, they got rid of the grass,” said Grace, shaking her head. “Don’t tell my dad.”

I chuckled. “And give him a stroke? No way.”

Grace looked around; I could tell her curiosity was piqued. She pointed at a tree near the eastern edge of the backyard. “That’s where we buried our first dog, Lola. I tried planting tulips, but they never grew. Probably because tulips don’t do so well in the desert,” she said.

The house still had the swimming pool, which reminded me of when Grace had taught me to swim. A variety of kids’ toys were scattered everywhere, to the point that Grace and I had to be careful not to trip over something in the dim light of twilight.

Grace started climbing up into the tree house before I followed her inside. The tree house was smaller than I remembered. Then again, I hadn’t been up here in years.

“Oh, man, look,” Grace said. She pointed at one of the beams. “Look, my initials are still here, along with Ben’s.”

At the mention of Ben’s name, my heart sank. I could also tell Grace was far away, thinking about her older brother.

“I was thinking about what you said last night,” I said quietly. “About me loving you.”

Grace’s eyes widened, and I could just make out a blush on her cheeks. “Yeah?”

“I do. I mean, I do love you. I think I have for a long time.”

“Oh.”

I took her hand and pulled her onto my lap. “Do you ... feel the same?”

She was breathing hard. I worried I’d pushed her too fast, too soon. But then she started laughing.

“Brady Carmichael, how can you even ask that? I’ve loved you for years. Isn’t it obvious?”

I was nonplussed. “Really?”

“Yeah, really! Honestly.” She shook her head. “Men can be so dense.”

My heart soared at her words. I wasn’t even offended by her insult.

I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her neck. She sighed happily.

“You said you’ve loved me for years,” I said. “Does that mean there’s nothing I could do to change that?”

Grace turned to look at me. “What do you mean?”

I knew I was in dangerous territory, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself. “How much do you really love me?”

“If you’re saying I could stop loving you, no, probably not. But you could definitely do things that’d make me think that love wasn’t enough.”

I was the one breathing hard now. “Like what?”

“Uh, well, I’d probably break things off with you if you murdered somebody. That’s kind of a big one.” She held up a finger. “Cheating, definitely. Oh, and just being dishonest in general. I hate lying. How can I trust somebody if you lie to me all the time?”

My stomach twisted. I’d walked into this trap all on my own, I knew. I should never have asked questions to receive answers I didn’t want to hear.

You’ve kept your secrets to keep her from getting hurt, I reminded myself. That’s not the same thing as outright lying.

I pulled her back into my arms and held her tightly, hoping against hope this wouldn’t be the last time I could touch her.

We returned to the hotel a few hours later, exhausted both physically and emotionally. Grace hopped in the shower while I tried in vain to find something to watch on TV.

But my brain could think only about her being wet and naked in the shower. I closed my eyes, groaning silently.

I couldn’t help but imagine Grace soaping up her entire body, the suds slicking down her torso, her nipples peeking out from behind the soap bubbles. Did she ever use the showerhead to masturbate?

Nearly every woman I’d talked to loved using that thing. More than once, I’d enjoyed using it on a lover.

Would Grace use her fingers first? Or would she immediately spray her clit until her body started trembling with her building orgasm?

I was already hard and aching just from my imagination. I turned over, burying my face in a pillow. This is not the time or the place, you sick freak.

But right now, I couldn’t believe my own words. Life was too tenuous, too fragile. What the fuck was I doing, denying myself the woman I loved, a woman who wanted me as much as I wanted her?

I swallowed. Then, getting up, I opened the bathroom door to find Grace standing in front of the mirror. Steam rose all around her. Her entire body was pink.

Her eyes widened. “Brady,” she whispered. But she didn’t seem shocked—if anything, she looked pleased.

“I can’t fight this anymore,” I admitted with a sigh. I wrapped my arms around her from behind. “Tell me you feel the same.”

She inhaled sharply. “Do you even have to ask?” Then she turned in my arms and cupped my face.

I closed my eyes. “You have one last chance to say no.”

“Then I say yes, and yes, and yes, again,” she said resolutely.

I kissed her. I groaned as our mouths met and groaned even louder when she arched against me. My hands ran up and down her back; I squeezed her ass, kneading the firm globes. Our tongues tangled together as I deepened the kiss.

“What’s your safe word again?” I rasped.

Her pupils were dilated and her cheeks a bright red. “What?”

“The safe word.”

“Uh, galoshes. Right?”

“Right, baby.” I kissed her forehead. “I’m going to take good care of you.”

“I know. I’ve never doubted that.”

I carried her to the bed and laid her down. I took in her body: her flushed cheeks, her hard nipples, the indent of her waist, and even her red-painted toes.

As she watched, I stripped out of my clothes until I was as naked as she was. I stroked my cock, loving the way she licked her lips in anticipation.

“What are you waiting for?” she asked, reaching for me.

“Patience. I want this to be good for you.” I got on the bed and caged her in with my body. “I don’t want this to be a three-second pump and dump.”

That made her giggle. “If I could do that to the legendary Brady Carmichael, I’d be proud of myself.”

I kissed her, forcing myself to go slowly. This was her first time, after all.

I’d been with a virgin only once when I’d been a virgin myself. I’d been just a teenager, and I’d had no idea how to pleasure a woman. My girlfriend had seemed bored throughout the entire thing, even asking me if I’d finished yet.

I knew better now, though. I knew how to bring a woman to the brink of orgasm, over and over again, until she was begging to come.

I began kissing down her neck as I touched her breasts. “Do you play with your nipples when you masturbate?” I asked, curious now.

Grace looked away. “Sometimes,” she admitted.

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

I began plucking and tweaking her nipples, wanting to see how hard she liked it. Fortunately for me, Grace was vocal about what she did—and didn’t—like. When I sucked one nipple into my mouth, she moaned and arched upward.

“I wonder if I could make you come just from this,” I mused. I sucked on the other nipple until they were both hard, red berries. “Your tits are gorgeous, baby. I’ve wanted to do this for ages.”

“They’re kinda small, though.”

I shot her an annoyed look. “Sweetheart, tits are tits. We love them no matter what. Believe me, no guy is disappointed seeing tits like yours. It’s been hell on earth when you wear those dresses without a bra on, when I can see your nipples harden through the fabric.”

“I didn’t think you’d noticed that.”

“I notice everything about you.”

That made her smile. I moved down her body, kissing every inch of her soft, milky skin. When I found a collection of freckles on her inner thighs, I couldn’t help kissing those until she giggled.

“That tickles,” she said with a moan.

I kept kissing her until I reached her ankles. I tickled the soles of her feet until she begged for mercy. Then it was easy to part her thighs to find the best prize of all.

She was pink and wet already, dripping for me, and all I wanted to do was bury my face in her pussy. I slicked a finger from her clit to her asshole, which made her moan loudly.

“Someday I’d love to fuck this tight ass,” I said, rubbing her asshole. I licked her there and then moved upward to plunge my tongue into her pussy.

“Oh God, Brady,” she groaned, gripping my hair.

She was trembling already, and I knew it wouldn’t take long to make her come. I gently pressed my thumb against her clit as I fucked her with my tongue. Her juices poured into my mouth; I moaned as her moisture only increased with every stroke.

She was arching and writhing so much that she nearly bucked me off the bed. I mouthed her clit and thrust a finger inside her, feeling her tighten around me like a vise.

“Oh my God, oh my God—” Grace was saying, over and over again. Then she came with a scream that I was sure everyone in the entire hotel heard.

I grinned evilly. I wanted everyone to hear how well I fucked my woman tonight.

Grace was limp and panting by the time I returned with a condom on. She pulled me into her arms as I slowly entered her.

“Fuck,” I groaned. “You’re so tight, baby.”

She winced as I inched farther inside. I kissed her, stopping myself so she could get used to me.

“How does it feel?” I asked. I kissed her jaw.

Grace shook her head. “I feel ... full.”

It took every ounce of my self-control not to thrust to the hilt right then. I was shaking, my entire body on fire, my cock begging for more of her tight pussy.

I started thrusting into her slowly, watching a thousand different expressions flit across her face. And then I was completely inside her, my balls resting against her taint, so tight and warm that it was a miracle I didn’t lose my fucking mind.

“Brady,” said Grace. She took my face in her hands and kissed me. “I love you, Brady.”

I groaned. I hooked her legs over my arms and pulled out before thrusting hard back into her. She squealed, but when I stopped, she just shook her head and begged me to keep going.

That was all I needed to unleash everything. I pounded into her sweet virgin pussy, lifting her lower body upward to get even deeper inside her.

“Rub your clit as I fuck you,” I said. Sweat dripped down my face. “I want to see your pretty fingers play with your pussy.”

Grace panted and moaned as she did as I asked. I watched her rub her clit as my cock pounded into her. It was one of the most erotic sights I’d ever seen.

Not just sights—sounds, smells, everything. With every plunge of my cock, her pussy made a squelching sound. I could feel her wetness dripping onto me and getting the bed wet. The scent of her drove me wild, and with every plunge into her, I could smell her only more.

I was close to coming. I could feel my balls drawing up. But I could tell by the tightness of Grace’s pussy that she was close to coming a second time. I reached down between us and rubbed her clit for her.

“Come on my cock, baby girl,” I crooned. “Show me how much you want me.”

Grace’s eyes were glassy. She was so far gone that I had a feeling she didn’t even know her own name. I kept fucking her, harder and harder, my thumb relentless on her clit.

Then she came with a long, loud scream, even louder than during her first orgasm. Her entire body was wracked with shudders.

As she came, my orgasm hit me. I let out a shout as I came, filling up the condom with cum I wished I could’ve left inside Grace’s sweet pussy.

I rolled off Grace and collapsed, panting and dizzy. My cock was still twitching. I pulled Grace into my arms and held her close.

“Oh, wow,” Grace was saying as she began coming off her high. “Holy crap, Brady.”

I chuckled, my voice hoarse. “You could say that again.”

“Is it always like that?”

I kissed her sweetly. “No, baby, it’s not,” I said honestly. “I’ve never had sex that good in my entire life.”

Grace looked smug.

Me? I was fucking terrified .

What have I unleashed inside us both?