18

IVY

THERE was a heavy silence that followed Maisie and Ginny’s night-time routines. Once they were bathed and dressed in their pyjamas, I put them to bed with Kerry, knowing full well it might be their last night with her.

Eloise joined me in the adjacent bedroom with a frown. “Well?”

I sighed and scrubbed a hand down my face. “Sorry, I couldn’t talk to Maeve about Mom yet.” Calling Kerry mom for their sake was starting to leave a bitter taste in my mouth, like a lie that would unravel at any moment.

My sister slumped on the bed beside me. “Will you try again tomorrow?”

“Of course,” I replied, nodding. “Don’t worry about it, okay? It’s my responsibility.”

Before Eloise could respond, a soft knock sounded at the door. It wasn’t Elias—he would have let me know through the bond—and it wasn’t Adrian. But a familiar warmth filled my chest, one that usually indicated one of the team was nearby.

We shared a look, and I shrugged. Getting to my feet, I padded over to the door and cracked it open.

Standing with her head bowed, Maeve was devastatingly beautiful and completely ashamed. I swallowed around the lump in my throat as she glanced up, and our eyes met. A tingle of electricity danced through my veins.

“I wanted to apologise for what happened earlier,” she said, her voice thick, her Irish accent more prominent. “Nash was entirely correct: it was unprofessional, and I could have hurt you because I hadn’t fed yet.”

I bit the inside of my cheek. Her dismissal had hurt more than I’d expected, but I tried to push it aside. I wanted to blame it on stress or being overwhelmed with everything that was going on.

And yet, I couldn’t fully understand why it had hurt to be pushed aside and regarded with disdain. Had she been disgusted with me? Herself? Maeve was an expert with hiding her emotions, and right now, she only proved how skilled she was.

I cleared my throat and pushed out into the hall. Maeve stepped aside to let me through, waiting for the door to shut before speaking again.

“You mentioned your mother. Have you decided what you want to do?”

I nodded carefully. “Eloise decided it was time. She wants to let Kerry go and tell the younger girls.”

Maeve’s blue eyes softened as she glanced at the door. “Poor girl.”

“Yeah,” I murmured, crossing my arms. “I just need to know what happens now. Do you talk to Marion? What exactly will happen to Kerry?”

Sparkling eyes met mine, eyes suddenly so filled with sadness and anger that I almost flinched away. But I tightened my hold on myself as she watched me. My blood warmed, and my cheeks flushed under her gaze.

There were a thousand things I wanted to say, to ask. I wanted to know if she felt just as affected as I did. I wanted to ask if she felt that same spark of electricity or if it was all in my head.

Because it was getting harder to ignore. Was I just fooling myself? I had Elias and Adrian, yet Maeve and Rowan affected me the same way.

Maeve was here, standing in front of me, and it felt like we were worlds apart once more. Again, I was still so unsure if what I was feeling even made any sense.

“I’ve been in contact with one of the queen’s council members. It is not uncommon for the Queen to have a family tomb, though those tend to be built over two hundred years into their rule. However, Queen Greer has ordered a tomb for your rule to be built now so that Kerry can be laid to rest there.”

A shiver worked its way down my spine. “That seems a little morbid.”

Maeve reached for me hesitantly before dropping her hand. “I understand. Queen Greer wanted to make sure there was a place for her in Avalon.” Something in Maeve’s voice told me it hadn’t been Queen Greer’s idea.

Cocking my head, I allowed myself to take her cold hand in mine. Maeve’s eyes flashed to mine, darkening as she tightened her grip on my fingers. “Thank you.”

“For what?” she asked.

“For thinking of my family.”

She opened her mouth, but it snapped shut as the door opened. Eloise stuck her head out and looked at our joined hands for a moment before crossing her arms. “So, what do we do?”

Maeve squeezed my hand once more before releasing my fingers. “Leave it to me, Eloise, but I’ll have everything ready for you tomorrow.”

El cocked her head, but she didn’t question Maeve. “Okay.”

A shaky breath fell from my lips as I nodded to Maeve. Pushing the door open further, I motioned for Eloise to enter before turning back to Maeve.

“Thank you again.”

Maeve stood there for a moment, her eyes alight with emotions I couldn’t read, but they were shut down completely. Bowing her head, she stepped back and clasped her hands behind her. “Sleep well, a mhuirnín.”

I could only nod in response as she disappeared down the hall and into her personal office.

~

Morning came with rain and darkness. I awoke with a dry mouth and crusty eyes from crying in my sleep. No nightmares had awoken me, but I could feel an impending headache at the edges of my mind. My stomach turned as I pushed myself up into a sitting position.

Eloise slept soundly across the bed, her head buried beneath a pillow, her soft snores filling the room. On the floor beside me, Elias gazed up at me in wolf form.

“What are you doing?” I asked quietly, throwing the blankets off. The cold air hit me immediately. “You didn’t have to spend the night—”

The wolf cocked its head before the sound of bones snapping and reforming filled the room, cutting me off. In the blink of an eye, the dark-brown wolf was gone.

Elias knelt in front of me and brushed a hand over my cheek. “I couldn’t be without you, especially when I could feel your pain.” He shook his head, his eyes flickering to where Eloise slept. “Being the wolf and sleeping beside you was the only way I could be with you, to offer you comfort.”

I bit the inside of my cheek as I gazed at him. Dark stubble lined his sharp jaw. His eyes were shadowed and hooded, and although the way he looked at me almost made me want to drag him to his room, I didn’t feel pressured by him or the bond to do so. Instead, I felt safe as he took my other hand and interlinked our fingers.

I sucked in a breath and released it slowly. “Thank you.”

A gentle smile played on his lips as the door to Kerry’s room opened. Maisie rubbed her eyes as she entered the bedroom, yawning loudly as she came to a stop.

“Good morning,” I murmured, smiling down at her.

Maisie blinked tiredly up at me, then at Elias. “I gotta pee.”

I snorted softly and shook my head. “Then go. And don’t forget to wash your hands.”

She huffed and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. I flinched as Eloise threw the pillow off her head, a tired glare sent my way. “What the hell?”

“It was Maisie. Go back to sleep.”

Instead of settling under the blankets, Eloise sat up and ran a hand through her messy hair. “Ugh. It’s still dark outside.”

“Go back to sleep then,” I replied, shaking my head. Elias chose that moment to stand and stretch; he was wearing his tactical gear, which didn’t tear off his body when he shifted. It also revealed the outlines of his muscular body.

My cheeks burned as his eyes met mine. I’d been blatantly checking him out. Oh fuck.

Maybe later, he replied, winking down at me.

I cleared my throat and shook my head. Maisie threw the bathroom door open, commanding the attention of everyone in the room, as she hurled herself onto the bed. Eloise didn’t even look upset by the interruption or the sudden body now lying next to her.

A month ago, she would have yelled for Kerry to come get Maisie out of her room.

A lump formed in my throat. “You sleep as long as you need to, El.” I looked down at Maisie. “Are you awake, or will you sleep for a little longer?”

The six-year-old crinkled her nose as she looked between me and Eloise. Her little hands curled into fists as she considered what she wanted to do.

As we waited, I spared Elias a look. He’d crossed his arms over his broad chest and seemed unbothered by my sisters and their mannerisms.

Finally, Maisie huffed. “I’m awake. I want pancakes.”

I nodded and pressed my lips into a firm line. “I think we can manage that. El?”

“I’m going back to sleep,” she replied, throwing herself down and bringing the blankets up to her chin. “Wake me when it’s time.”

The mood shifted with that, and all I could do was nod. Taking Maisie’s hand, I guided her to the closet. I quickly helped her change, throwing my hair into a bun and dressing in something other than Elias’s sweats and t-shirt. I found a bag of clothes that almost brought tears to my eyes.

My clothes.

There was a bag for each girl, filled with their own stuff. Maisie’s dolls, Ginny’s old stuffed turtle, and Eloise’s framed photo of her and her dad.

I swallowed thickly and changed into my own clothes, finally feeling a little bit more like me and not this stranger who was living in a fancy safe house being hunted because she was going to become Queen.

Shaking my head, I left the safety of the closet and found Maisie standing with Elias, her hand tucked into his large palm. His smile was soft and a bit stiff, but I didn’t get the feeling it was because of my sister.

Green eyes danced down my body, taking in the worn jeans and old, green-knit sweater I’d found in the bag. His brows furrowed as our eyes met. “Where’d you get those?” he asked.

I frowned. “I found a bag of my stuff in the closet. There’s one for each girl.” I pulled out the three duffels and left the one that belonged to Eloise on the chair beside the bed, dropping Ginny’s on the floor beside it since I doubted she’d be up until later.

I opened Maisie’s and handed her a doll. “Here you go, nugget. And look, someone packed your dresses for you.”

Maisie clamped a hand over her mouth and pulled a dress from the mass of sparkly material. With an excited little squeal, she ran into the closet and threw off the borrowed clothes before strutting out in an Elsa-mock blue and white dress.

“Okay, now I’m ready,” she said, grinning at me. She grabbed her discarded doll and retook Elias’s hand. “Time for pancakes?”

I nodded. “Time for pancakes.”

Pancakes were not my forte. Usually, I let Thea make things like that, but chose to leave her alone. She’d done enough for us, and the last thing I wanted to do was to force her out of bed.

Instead, I set to work. Batter ended up all over my hands before I was rescued by Adrian. He claimed I was ‘not helpful’ in the kitchen, and instead of arguing—because Thea had always said the same thing—I made coffee and sat with Maisie. At least she was finding some sort of normal. She talked nonstop about a cartoon she wanted to watch when we finally went home.

My stomach twisted at those words; Adrian and I exchanged an uncertain look as he dished up the pancakes. Would she understand that we couldn’t go back? Probably not for a while. I suspected Ginny was on her way to understanding we weren’t going home to Blakeview. But Maisie had a childlike hope that everything would return to the way it was.

And it killed me knowing that I would have to destroy that hope in a matter of hours.

Ginny and Eloise, dressed in their own clothes, finally made their way down after an hour. Ginny smiled a little as she dropped onto a chair beside me with her turtle under her arm. Eloise said nothing as she slid into the seat on Maisie’s other side, simply resting her chin on her hand as she watched Adrian cook up another batch of pancakes despite my protests—and Eloise’s questions of why a ‘prince’ needed to know how to make pancakes.

Tension filled the air when the girls finished and Maeve came down from her office. Rowan was beside her with Marion, and all three hid their emotions well. Only Eloise was aware of what was about to happen.

Maeve didn’t have to say a word; I nodded my understanding and gathered the girls, motioning for them to come into the sitting room with me.

Heart thundering, I sat Ginny and Maisie on the plush sofa. Eloise joined them, crossing her feet under herself as she nodded in my direction. I took a seat on the coffee table across from them. I tried to keep my own anxiety out of my voice as I watched them.

“We need to talk about Mom,” I started, watching both girls carefully. “She’s not going to get better.”

Maisie shook her head, tears welling in her wide, blue eyes. “No, she’s just asleep. You said she was asleep, and she’d wake up.”

“I’m sorry, nugget,” I murmured, pressing a hand to her trembling knee. “She isn’t going to wake up. She was more hurt than we expected, and now, it’s time to let her go.”

Tears streamed down Ginny’s red cheeks as she looked at Eloise, but the little bit of hope she had died instantly. Eloise straightened her back and wrapped an arm around Ginny. “It’s true. Mom is only hurting because she’s asleep. It’s time we say goodbye. She knows we’re gonna be okay with Ivy.”

Soft sobs sounded from Maisie. “I don’t want Mommy to go.”

“I know,” I replied, my voice cracking. “I don’t either. But she’s not okay.”

The crying continued as Maisie crawled into my lap. I held her close to me as her tears soaked through my sweater.

“We’re going to say goodbye,” I said, sucking in a shaky breath as my own tears fell down my cheeks, “and we’re going to tell her we love her. And we’re going to let her go. She’s going to join Nanna and Pop-pop. And Thea’s Grammy. She won’t be alone where she’s going, okay? And you guys won’t be alone. You’ll never be alone with me.”

Soft cries filled the sitting room, and I let that wash over me. I should have been able to do more for them, should have been able to save Kerry or prevent it from happening. And I hated myself for thinking like that because I hadn’t been the one to stab Kerry with the poison—but I might as well have.

It isn’t your fault, Elias whispered. I could feel his presence close by, but he stayed in the kitchen with the rest of the team. You know that it isn’t. You just need to focus on them. Let me think about the bastards responsible and their deaths.

I would have laughed if it weren’t for the shaky breaths struggling to fill my lungs. Instead, I tightened my hold on Maisie. Eloise looked up at me, her own silent tears streaming down her face, but she held herself together better than I’d expected—better than she should have.

When the crying lessened, I stroked Maisie’s hair and asked, “Are you ready?”

Maisie had her thumb in her mouth, and I couldn’t find it within me to tell her to stop. She pulled back from me slightly and nodded, skin splotchy and red, eyes puffy. Ginny looked the same as she clutched her turtle to her chest. But she nodded as she sniffled.

Eloise and I shared one last look as we took their hands.

Marion had disappeared, likely to prepare Kerry. I had no idea the process of what would happen after we said goodbye, but I trusted Maeve to have that sorted. I met the vampire’s sad gaze and nodded.

She followed us up, as did Elias, Rowan, and Adrian. It was comforting to have them all there, to know that we wouldn’t be alone.

Thea was already in the room, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She was wearing her own clothing, and stared sadly at us as we filed in. But she didn’t say a word. Instead, she gave us her strength and pulled me into her side as Maisie and Ginny crawled onto the bed.

Marion stood across from us, her hands clasped, as she said, “I will protect her until she reaches Avalon.”

Ginny made a strangled noise as she threw her arms over Kerry. “They’re taking her away?” she asked, her body shaking as she sobbed.

I blew out a breath and sat on the edge of the bed. “Yeah, they have to. They need to take Mom away like they did with Nanna.”

Ginny pulled back from Kerry and sniffled. “Why?”

“For lots of reasons,” I said. “But she’ll be okay.”

For a moment, Ginny didn’t move. Her eyes were on me instead of Kerry, wide and sad, irises filled with uncertainty. But after a few seconds of tense silence, she nodded, and I released a heavy breath as she let me wrap an arm around her.

Maisie crawled up to rest her head on Kerry’s shoulder, and she whispered things in her ear I couldn’t quite make out. But by the look on her sweet little face, it was her way of saying goodbye.

I pressed my nails into my palms to stop myself from breaking down. It wasn’t my turn, and they needed me to be strong. They needed to know I was there.

While Eloise talked to Kerry, I dredged up the good memories I had from my childhood. The memories were usually shrouded in resentment. But I cleared that away and focused on the happiness she had brought me—the first time she let me hold a sleepover and the fun activities she’d planned for me and my friends. A shopping spree where we celebrated her new job. The nights she held me while I cried over a man I’d never met.

The first time she’d acknowledged me as more than a disappointment when I’d told her how I thought no one would love me, and she promised someone would, no matter what.

I let those memories, the happy and the sad, come to the surface as I settled Ginny beside me and leaned over to press a kiss on Kerry’s forehead.

“We might not have always seen eye to eye, but you were still my mom, and I’m going to miss you.”

When I looked up, I nodded in Marion’s direction. “If you could take the girls into the other room,” she said softly, “I’ll prepare her for Avalon.”

With a shaky sigh, Thea and I gathered the girls and pulled them into the adjacent bedroom. They cried themselves to sleep as magic filled the room. Later, Elias whispered in my mind that Kerry had been transported to Avalon, Marion soon to follow, but he hadn’t given me much insight into the magic. Just that Kerry, not being…alive, could be sent to Avalon directly, unlike the living.

And after all was done, I pulled Eloise to my side and kissed her head. “You can let it out now, El,” I whispered, “you don’t have to be strong anymore. I’m here.”

Her cries were no longer silent as she clung to me, and I held her in a way I hadn’t since she was a child.

With each heart-shattering sob, I felt something swell inside her. Something that both frightened and scared me. It reminded me she wasn’t human. And soon, she would understand that, too.