Chapter 26

Benjamin

"Come what may, all bad fortune is to be conquered by endurance." ― Virgil

New Year's Eve, 1865

Benjamin withdrew some folded sheets of paper from his desk drawer and set to read the letter again. It had come from Daniel, delivered by Benedict upon his return from America a week ago. Since then, Benjamin had kept going back to it, wanting the guidance of his brother's wise, kind words.

He had now been in England for nearly two months. In that time, much had changed, but the most important matter still lay unresolved. Sarah had not broken off her engagement to Templeton. She was still lost to him, despite his surreptitious efforts to woo her.

In the guise of a mere friend, he had kept her company on walks, lunches and dinners. He had made an offering to her of the locomotive he had painstakingly built for her miniature railway. She knew he desired a kiss from her and that there was a lady he wished to marry, if only she would have him. He had hoped by now that Sarah would have started making sense of the many clues he had dropped about his feelings and intentions. Unfortunately, his beloved was proving to be obtuse in her thinking. Surely by now, she would have seen through the sham of Templeton's charmingly false courtship? But no, she still clung to the notion that she was destined for that rake.

It was enough to drive a man as violently in love as was Benjamin to drown his sorrows in drink. Except he had not. And there was the great change that had occurred in the past two months. Benjamin had remained steadfast in his determination to become a better person. There had been only one further episode of punching a tree in anger, and that had been on the day the announcement had been made in The Times of Sarah's betrothal. That had been followed by a proud showing off of the family heirloom ring that Templeton had put on Sarah's finger as a symbol of their engagement. This had been too much for Benjamin to bear, and he had escaped to the wooded park to let his pain and frustration rip through him.

However, he had not let that one lapse send him into a spiral of despair. On his return to the house with bloodied hands, he had not instructed Siddons to bring out the whiskey. Instead, he had dressed the wounds, taken out the volume of Ovid's Metamorphoses, and sought solace in the words of an ancient poet.

There had been one other positive development in the time he had spent in England, and that had been his blossoming friendship with Ambrose Cranshaw. Benjamin felt an affinity for the man on several levels. Firstly, he was Sarah's only sibling and the person closest to her. Then, of course, there was the curious rapport that seemed to have grown between Ambrose and Daniel, which also strengthened the connection Benjamin felt for the man. And quite apart from all that, Benjamin had found Ambrose's tranquil disposition to be the perfect balm for his battered spirits.

The two men met every week to discuss the business of the Stanton estate, but they also got into the habit of conversing on other matters. Over time, Benjamin had opened up to Ambrose about his personal struggles, the pain he felt and how it turned into rage at himself. Ambrose would hear him out, then provide a grain of wisdom in his quietly lucid way. This friendship with Ambrose helped sustain Benjamin in his time of need. And so too did his brother's love, felt across the ocean and expressed in the letter that he now held in his hands.

December 1st, 1865

Dear Benjamin,

I was sorry to hear of your disappointment about Sarah. I was saddened both on your account and on Sarah's, for I have come to care for her as a brother, and I do not like the idea of her marrying a man such as Philip Templeton.

Your house is almost done. In another two weeks or so, it should be ready for habitation. I have put all my effort and dedication into making it a fine house for you. It may not welcome your bride just yet, but someday, I believe there will be a deserving woman who will share that home with you. Do not despair, dear brother.

As to your question on what to do now, I have two things to say. Firstly, are you sure all hope is lost with regards to Sarah? Perhaps she will change her mind now you are there and break off her engagement to Philip Templeton, though admittedly, the chances of her doing that are slim. I have come to know her as being rather stubborn, a trait she shares with Ambrose. She will cling stubbornly to her commitment to Templeton, even in the face of his undoubted unsuitability for her. I may be biased, but I believe she would be mad to choose Templeton over you. You, Benjamin, are the very best of men. You have a caring gentleness in your soul, just like Mama. I would hope Sarah will soon see past the scary appearance to who you are beneath, though I must say I envy you that raffish scar and luxuriant grey beard.

The second thing I have to say is this. Come home! We long to have you back, dear brother, and though you may return without a bride, you will be surrounded by the people who love you. You will have your own house and as much seclusion as you crave, and you can set to work on building that large shed for your engineering work. I have no doubt you managed to repair that steam plough and put it to good use. Am I correct? If you come home, I am sure there will be plenty of similar contraptions you can fix! Labour to do what you love, Benjamin, and soon you will experience the satisfaction of success. After that, perhaps romantic love will follow with someone new. Who knows what God has planned for each of us?

So, come home. We do miss you.

Your loving brother,

Daniel Stanton

Benjamin sighed and put the letter away once more. These past months, he had persisted in the hope that Sarah would come to change her mind about Philip Templeton, but the time was coming close when Benjamin would have to admit defeat and cede all hope of winning the woman he loved. He would give it one more try before giving up and going home. With that thought, he stood and adjusted his neckcloth. All the guests had arrived an hour earlier—Ambrose, Sarah, Templeton, Benedict and Grace. It was time for him to show his face and play the benevolent host.