8. Adam

8

ADAM

I stood at the edge of the wooden dock, my gaze lingering on the sun as it appeared slowly on the horizon.

“Whose idea was this?” Lex said, yawning.

“I believe it was a joint one,” Noah added.

“Never. I would never agree to being tortured. I thought this was a vacation,” Lex said, pulling Emery closer and hiding his face in his boyfriend’s neck, pretending to snore.

“Like it or not, we’re here,” Lior said. “I, for one, am looking forward to finding out if my husband can provide for me if the end of the world comes and we have nothing more than our natural resources.”

“Baby, I could flirt the fish out of any fisherman, but if you’re hoping for me to provide in a case of need, you might go hungry.”

Lior wrapped his arms around Noah’s waist and lifted him over his shoulder. “I guess I’ll just have to eat you instead.”

I looked away. The sight of both my brothers so perfectly in love made me as happy as it made me sad. While I would never ask them to tone down their affection in front of me, I was also…jealous.

I was supposed to be doing that right now too. Lazy breakfasts in bed, sunscreen application turning into another round of hot sex, talking about the future with a margarita in hand.

Pushing those thoughts away, I glanced at River, who was right beside me, his gaze reflecting the orange hues of the rising sun, a subtle excitement in the tilt of his smile.

“Ready for this?” I asked, half teasing, half serious.

“Yup. Let’s see if any of us has improved since we last went fishing with your dad,” he replied with a chuckle.

The guide, a seasoned sailor with a weathered look, came out from the boat.

“Good morning, gentlemen. I’m Kianu, and I will be your captain, guide, and, if you’re lucky, your chef. I hope you’re ready for a good day of fishing. We’re forecast for smooth water, so no excuses today. My children’s dinner depends on your success.”

We all looked at each other, panic setting in everyone’s eyes.

Kianu laughed. “Only joking. I don’t have kids, and my wife is a vegetarian, but whatever you catch will be your lunch, so I hope you’re either very good or brought snacks.”

Emery raised his arm, holding a backpack. “Snacks.”

“My kind of dude,” Kianu said. “All aboard. We’ve got a pot of coffee to get through while we sail to our destination.”

We helped each other onto the rental boat, ready for the safety brief before the start of our adventure and definitely ready for a good cup of coffee.

As the boat sailed farther into the Pacific, I took note of the light of the rising sun on the island’s shore. It was truly a beautiful sight.

Kianu delivered on his promise. The coffee was good, and he even threw in a batch of pineapple-shaped shortbread cookies made by his wife.

By the time we arrived at our destination, the sun was high in the sky and we could no longer see land.

River sat across from me, preparing his line as Kianu instructed. The reels were bigger and heavier than the ones we’d used to fish at the lake in Stillwater with my dad.

While I struggled to set mine up, River seemed like he’d been doing it for years. My gaze was fixed on his capable hands and the way the muscles in his forearms moved. He had corded muscles going all the way up to where his tattoos disappeared under the sleeves of his T-shirt.

“Adam? You all right there?” Lex’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.

“Yeah, just…I don’t think this is an activity I’ll excel at.”

“Here. I’ll set yours up for you,” River said, placing his rod beside him and taking mine.

The boat bobbed gently on the undulating waves, and I found myself staring again at River’s hands as he worked. When I looked up at his face, he was smiling to himself. His tongue peeked out a little from between his lips. He was so focused on the task that he didn’t even notice, which made me smile because it brought back memories of when we were kids playing or trying to figure out the rules of a game and River would do the same thing.

When both our reels were set up, we cast our lines into the water.

My fingers wrapped around the fishing rod with faux confidence. Mostly, I hoped I wouldn’t get a bite because the fish would probably pull me out of the boat and into the sea, where I’d get eaten alive.

“All right, guys,” Noah declared, “let’s see who can catch the biggest fish! Loser buys drinks at karaoke tonight!”

Lex whooped, his competitive spark igniting instantly, and Lior shot me a grin while keeping a protective arm around Noah. Probably in case he decided to catch a shark with his bare hands.

“May the best angler win,” River said.

The ocean stretched before us, a vast unknown full of possibility and hidden currents. “Deal!” I replied. Fake it ’til you make it, right? “I’m going to claim that title. Get ready for the tales of my legendary catch!”

“Legendary?” Lex’s voice cut through the sound of the waves slapping against the hull. “Please, Adam! Remember that fishing trip we took with Dad when we were fifteen? You nearly fell out of the boat over that tiny fish!”

I punched River’s arm as he laughed so hard he nearly fell off his seat before I focused back on my reel, willing it to bring me a good one.

For a while, all I could hear was the sound of the waves and a seagull or two in the distance. I lost myself in thoughts, but for once, it wasn’t my failed relationship, the embarrassment of being jilted just before the wedding, or the bill I’d been left with.

As my hands gripped the reel, I glanced around at my family, and all I could feel was peace. The sun warmed my face so I closed my eyes, seeing the bright orange through my eyelids.

We were still at the beginning of the vacation, but I already knew it had been a good idea to bring everyone along. In their individual ways, they were all helping me feel a little more like myself. And even though I was still very emotionally sore from what happened only days ago, I was also starting to see where I’d lost myself a little to my relationship with Victoria.

Something pulled on my rod. “Can you guys feel that?” I asked, more to myself than anyone else, as I sensed the subtle pull beneath the surface. “Guys, I think I’ve got a bite!” The shout left my lips before I processed the tingle of excitement rushing up the rod.

My heart thumped erratically as I tried to reel in whatever was caught on the line. “It must be huge.” I declared, more out of hope than certainty, gripping the rod with all my strength.

“Come on, Adam,” River encouraged. “You’ve got this.”

My arms ached as I gave a final tug, and with a splash that sprayed cold droplets across my face, a small fish landed on the deck. It flopped pitifully, its scales catching the sunlight.

“Look at this beauty!” I held it up high, filled with pride.

The moment of cheers gave into an eruption of laughter.

“That’s dinner sorted,” Noah said.

“We’re gonna need a big fire for that,” Lex added.

“Hey, I’m not seeing your big catches,” River said, coming to my defense. He didn’t need to because I wasn’t taking my brothers’ ribbing seriously, but I liked that he did.

Kianu surfaced from the cabin with a camera.

“Okay, guys. Time to pose. You’re going on my wall.”

They all gathered around me and the fish, and at Kianu’s signal, everyone shouted “Fishy!” as he took the photo.

“What are you going to do with it?” River asked.

“I have to release him. No way I could stand to eat him. Look at his face.” I turned the fish’s head to face River, and his face turned a little green.

“Yeah. Agreed.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I have a feast for you, and that I was joking when I said you'd eat what you caught. Reel everything in, and let’s celebrate our catch and release in style,” Kianu said.

As we reeled in our lines, Kianu brought a tray filled with sandwiches. Then he returned downstairs, coming back up with a six-pack of beer.

“I’m afraid this is all I allow on the boat,” he said, “but a celebration is in order.”

I chuckled. “What do you do when someone catches an actual big fish? Throw fireworks?”

He flipped the lid on a can of soda and took a swig. “You’d be surprised at how little fishing actually happens on these trips. Most people just want to go out in open water and maybe swim a little.”

“You mean we can swim out there?” River asked.

“Sure, you can.”

Before Kianu had finished, River’s T-shirt was over his head. He ran toward the back of the boat and threw himself into the water.

I followed him to see him resurface.

“Guys, the water is phenomenal. Jump in before you eat.”

I looked back at the guys who’d started taking their shirts off. Kianu sat on the cushioned bench and flipped his backward cap forward before leaning back, looking as chill as anything.

“I guess this makes me the winner because with you all splashing around, you’re going to scare all the fish,” I said, throwing my T-shirt onto the pile and jumping into the water after everyone.

“This was the best idea ever,” Lex said.

“I believe your exact words were—” Emery started but was cut off by Lex, who kissed him.

A quick glance at Noah and Lior revealed they were also whispering to each other between sweet kisses.

I looked away, feeling like an intruder in their moments.

“You can say something, you know?”

I turned to River. “What do you mean?”

“If it’s hard for you to see them all loved-up, you can ask them to tone it down. They’d do it in a heartbeat.”

“I know, but I don’t want to do that to them. They’re so in love. It’s nice to see. Even if it didn’t happen for me, I like that it happened for them. They both deserve to be really happy.”

River stared at me, his green eyes framed by long eyelashes glistening with water droplets. He came closer until I felt his hand take mine under the water.

“It’s going to happen for you too, Adam.”

A lump formed in my throat, but I didn’t want to give in to thoughts that had no place on a happy day.

“Of course it will,” I said, grinning. “I’m already the best fisherman. It can only get better from here on.”