Chapter Nineteen

HANNA

Hanna knew the moment she arrived that she shouldn't have come. Something was wrong. She hadn't been involved in a pick-up since finding out that Dieter had been taken and Noah had warned her from continuing, but when she'd heard about a little boy who needed urgent transportation, she hadn't hesitated in saying yes. The moment she'd heard that his papers had come through, she'd prepared for how to get him out, volunteering to both drive the ambulance and provide the triage care, given the shortage of nurses at the hospital. Thankfully, no one had questioned her.

She hadn't personally seen Noah for weeks, and as much as she knew that she should have heeded his warning, the people she worked with were as motivated as she was, and they had all agreed to proceed.

This one is for you, Dieter. He'd been on her mind constantly since he'd disappeared, and she only wished she didn't know so much about the camps. Otherwise she might have been able to pretend that he was all right.

Hanna turned into the street and slowly picked her way past rubble, changing her route as she came across bomb damage, relaxing a little once she'd left the city behind her. This rescue was a little different, because it was a boy who'd been left orphaned and cared for by a non-Jewish family. They were leaving Berlin and couldn't take him with them without a passport, so her job was to find a way to move him safely, so they could eventually reunite. It seemed to her the most certain reunion that she'd been part of – because deep down she was beginning to wonder whether the other children she'd helped would ever have the chance to see their parents again.

After driving for almost thirty minutes, Hanna was forced to slow down when she saw a SS blockade ahead on the road. What is all this about?

She came to a stop and rolled down her window to speak to one of the officers. ‘Can I pass through?' she asked.

‘Papers,' he asked, holding out his hand.

She leaned over and took her papers from her bag, passing them to him. ‘Why is the road blocked? Is there bomb damage ahead?'

He looked up at her and then at her papers, before passing them back to her.

‘You'll need to open up the back of the ambulance.'

Hanna stared at him for a moment, before realising he was deadly serious. ‘Can you not simply let me on my way so I can do my job?' she asked. ‘I have patients depending on me.'

‘Open up!' he shouted, banging his fist on the side of the ambulance.

Hanna reluctantly got out and opened the back doors, waiting where he told her to as he climbed in and searched the interior, turning things over and carelessly knocking medical supplies to the ground.

‘My father is Karl Müller,' she said. ‘Oberst-Gruppenführer Müller.'

The man just looked at her as if he couldn't have cared less, which made Hanna's skin crawl. Something was very, very wrong if he didn't have any reaction to her father's name. Every SS man in Berlin should have withered at the very mention of his rank. She thought of Ava's suspicions regarding Heinrich, and about what Noah had said.

‘Where are you travelling to?' he asked.

‘An assembly plant in Brandenburg. I understand there were multiple casualties after the air raid last night, and I've been sent to provide care and transport any patients that need to go the hospital.'

‘Will you be coming back this way?' he asked, surprising her when he didn't ask why she was travelling so far when there must have been closer ambulances that could have responded.

‘Yes,' she replied. ‘I have to return to the hospital.' Suddenly what she was doing seemed like a very bad idea.

‘Then we will search you again then,' he said, gesturing that she could walk ahead of him. ‘No one is passing through without being searched.'

‘May I ask what you're looking for, exactly?' she asked, as politely as she could, as if she couldn't imagine what he was possibly searching for.

‘Traitors,' he replied. ‘We are looking for cowards and traitors to our great country.'

Hanna swallowed and wished him good day, before climbing back into the ambulance and driving slowly through the SS blockade. Something told her it wasn't the worst thing that would happen to her that day.

She carried on, careful not to drive too fast or do anything that might attract attention, and within another twenty minutes she neared what was left of the assembly plant. But the place was crawling with SS; there was another patrol that she'd have to pass if she turned down there, and she knew that it wasn't worth the risk. As much as it broke her heart, as surely as the tears ran down her cheeks, there was no way she could attempt to rescue a Jewish child under such scrutiny – not knowing whether she would be searched as soon as she tried to drive away.

She only wished she knew what had happened for so many patrols to be in place.

Hanna turned the corner and drove away, deciding to drive directly to her rendezvous point where she was to meet the other ambulance. The last thing she wanted was for them to be sitting waiting for her, risking discovery, when she wasn't coming. But when she finally reached the meeting point, after an hour of driving, no one was there.

What do I do? Do I pull over and wait, or do I keep driving?

She passed the spot where she should have stopped, trying to imagine what Dieter would say if he were beside her, whether he would be brave enough to pull over, and suddenly she could almost hear his voice in her mind.

Trust your instincts, Hanna. You've been doing this long enough. If it doesn't feel right, then keep driving. You can't help anyone if you're caught.

And so she did. She drove further up the road until she could find a safe place to turn around, which was when she saw them. The two contacts whose names she didn't even know were standing on the side of the road, the doors to their ambulance open, as they faced two SS men.

Hanna gripped the steering wheel, heading straight on, not turning as she'd planned to do but deciding to drive an unfamiliar route just to avoid having to go past them again. But as she passed, she allowed herself a quick glance sideways, saw that one of the SS men was holding his pistol in his hand, and that was when the woman's terrified eyes met hers, and she shook her head ever so slightly. It was a very slight movement, a signal that Hanna understood. She was to keep on driving, no matter what. She wasn't to stop, or try to help them, or do anything other than drive past and get herself to safety.

She blinked away her tears, not taking her hands off the wheel to wipe away those that had escaped and were slipping down her cheeks. Hanna didn't stop until she was well out of sight, and when she did she took out a map to figure out how exactly she could get to their country house from where she was.

She needed to get home and warn her mother that something was happening.

‘Mama!' Hanna called as she leapt out of the ambulance, leaving the door flung open as she ran up to the house. ‘Mama! Where are you?' she called.

Hanna almost fell into Zelda's arms as she opened the door.

‘Hanna, we weren't expecting you,' Zelda said, steadying herself by catching hold of Hanna's arms. ‘What's the matter?'

‘I need to know where Mama is,' she panted. ‘Please, is she here?'

‘Your mother is—'

‘Hanna?' Her mother stood at the top of the stairs, rushing down when she saw how flustered her daughter was. ‘Come with me, into your father's study.'

Hanna took her hand and dragged her mother with her, closing the door behind them. She knew that Zelda was probably listening, so she kept her voice low and walked her mother all the way over to the window on the other side of the room.

‘Mama, something has happened,' she whispered. ‘There are SS everywhere, I was stopped by a patrol and—'

Her mother kept hold of her hand, their eyes locked on each other's.

‘My contacts were stopped on the side of the road, and I don't think they fared as well as I did.'

She watched as her mother looked out of the window. ‘You are alone? There's no one in the ambulance with you?'

Hanna nodded. ‘I'm alone. I couldn't pick up my patient, there was no way I could get to him.' That child will never leave Germany now. There won't be another way for him to escape.

‘Your father warned me that something was happening today,' her mother finally whispered in reply. ‘It must not have been a success.'

‘What was being planned? What success are you speaking of?' Had Ava been right about it being an assassination attempt?

She studied her mother's face, saw the way it fell, the way her lip quivered and her hands began to tremble.

‘Mama?'

She watched as her mother crossed the room, turning on the gramophone and pouring herself some brandy, swirling it around before drinking it in two quick gulps, her shoulders slumped forward.

‘There was a plot to assassinate the Führer,' she eventually said, turning back to look at Hanna, her eyes filled with sorrow. ‘At the Wolf's Lair in East Prussia. Today was the day that Hitler was supposed to take his last breath.'

Hanna gasped, her hand flying to cover her mouth. ‘What should we do? Where should I go?' She began to tremble. ‘Do I need to go to Ava? What if someone discovers her involvement?'

Her mother poured herself another drink as Hanna watched.

‘We return to our normal lives, we act as if we know nothing, as if nothing about our lives has changed,' she eventually said. ‘The only reason we'll be suspected of wrongdoing is if we appear guilty, and your father is already worried that he's under suspicion.'

‘So I should return to the city, then? To the hospital?'

Her mother passed her the drink, clearly thinking her daughter needed it more than she did, as Hanna stood beside her and downed the brandy.

But all she could think was that perhaps her mother had it wrong. Perhaps the Führer had been killed. Perhaps it had been a success, and the news simply hadn't reached them yet?

Or perhaps that was just wishful thinking.