Chapter Four: Martha

Chapter Four – Martha

Once the door was securely shut, Martha walked over to the kitchen area and lifted the lid of the container filled with Clint’s beef stew. The inviting aroma of the rich stew wafted through the room, bringing with it a sense of warmth and comfort, much like the warmth and comfort she got from the presence of the man himself.

Ignoring that thought, she grabbed a ladle and dished a portion of stew into a pan, to warm on the stove. Martha stirred it slowly, lost in thought as she reflected on her encounter with Clint. There was an undeniable attraction to him—something she had never felt before. Yet, at the same time, there was something else that drew her to him. A connection that seemed almost familiar despite them having only just met.

Martha shook her head in bewilderment as she continued stirring the stew. Maybe this was all just wishful thinking, brought on because she was new in town. Since she didn’t know anyone in Bear Creek, she was searching to form a connection with someone. Someone who would be there for her if she needed them.

A friend. That was all.

Who was she trying to fool? What she was feeling was not the same as she had ever felt for a friend.

Whatever it might be, Martha knew one thing for certain—she wanted to get to know Clint better and find out if what she felt could blossom into something more.

Martha took out a bowl from one of the cupboards and set it down on the counter before spooning the hot stew into it.

With a satisfied sigh, she sat down to eat.

The smell of the stew was intoxicating, and as Martha took her first bite, she was overwhelmed by its flavor. The beef was tender and juicy, slow-cooked in a rich gravy with chunks of carrots and potatoes. She was impressed by Clint’s clever use of the combination of herbs and spices he’d used to season the stew—rosemary, thyme, and oregano.

Just one more talent she’d like to learn from Clint. Her culinary skills were only a little better than her fire-lighting skills, which were nonexistent. However, she was a fast learner, and after observing Clint ignite the fire, she was sure she could do it, too. Not as proficiently, but at least she wouldn’t have to call on Clint every time she wanted the fire lit.

Was that a good thing? Maybe calling on Clint every day to light the fire would give her an excuse to get to know him.

He had said, ‘anything you need.’

As she ate, Martha’s thoughts drifted away from Clint and onto her future plans: finding the ideal house and settling down in Bear Creek for good. She felt ready to start her house hunt—if only she could find someone to show her around town...

And once again, her thoughts turned to Clint as she dug into her stew.

Martha spooned up the last bite of her hearty stew, then went to work making a fresh pot of coffee. Plans had to be made, and she knew that if she was going to set things in motion, her body needed fuel. The stress of packing up her life and driving cross country through icy conditions had tired her out more than she thought.

But good food and good coffee were quickly restoring her depleted energy supplies.

Later today, she planned to check out the real estate agents. A trip into town would give her a chance to get a feel for the place, too.

With a full stomach, Martha cradled the steaming cup of coffee in her hands and gave in to the sweet seduction of the plump, cozy couch. Her fingertips brushed against the soft fabric, tracing circles as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She let it out slowly, allowing the tension that had been a part of her life for so long to finally fade away.

The cabin was so cozy, filled with warmth and a sense of peace. It would be easy to stay here, curl up in front of the fire, and drift off—she’d had far too many sleepless nights lately. When she’d made the decision to leave her job and her friends, her apartment, and her life as she knew it, for a new life in the unknown, she’d been consumed with excitement. But as the moving date approached, that excitement had become something else altogether.

Doubt. It dogged her like a shadow, whispering in the back of her mind that she’d be better off staying where she was, too scared to step out from her own shadow.

But here she was. She’d found the courage—or maybe it had found her—and she was surrounded by a new kind of calm as she looked out the window at the majestic forest outside. Yes, this had been the right choice.

Just as she settled back into her seat, the phone rang, startling her. She glanced down at the caller ID, her heart rate tripling when she saw it was her mom. She took a deep breath before hitting the answer button.

“Hi, Mom,” Martha said, a little too brightly.

“Hey, love, how are you doing?” her mom asked, her usual warmth tinged with concern.

“I’m doing okay,” she said, trying to convince herself as much as her mom. “Just settling in and getting used to things.”

“That’s good to hear, but you don’t sound too sure. You can talk to me if you need to,” her mom probed, her tone gentle but insistent.

Martha paused, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. Her mom always instinctively knew when something was wrong.

Martha sighed and shut her eyes as she composed herself. “It’s just going to take some time, but I’m ready for it,” she replied, doing her best to hide the fear in her voice.

Until she heard her mom’s voice, she’d been doing okay. But the minute her mom spoke, it brought back every single sacrifice she’d made to chase her wildest dreams.

However, before her courage and hope could fade away, she dug deeper and grabbed hold of her steely determination once more. If she succeeded in finding the new life, the new happiness she was searching for, surely that would be worth all the sacrifice.

Except one.

“I understand, Martha. Remember, we are here for you if you ever need anything. Take care of yourself, okay? You don’t have to do it alone.” Her mom’s voice wavered, and Martha swallowed hard against the lump in her throat.

“What about Dad?” Martha’s throat tightened, her voice trembling as the question slipped out. A small gasp registered through the phone, and Martha held her breath, waiting for her mom’s answer.

“Your dad loves you very much, Martha. You know that.” The words tumbled out of her mother’s mouth, each one weighted with love and desperation.

Martha swallowed hard, her gaze fixed on the window. Of course she knew her dad loved her... but she also knew he didn’t support her in this new adventure. “I know, Mom,” she murmured.

Her mom hesitated, and Martha could sense the pain her mother was feeling as she tried to navigate the minefield of emotions between them. “He’s always been there for you,” she said in a quiet voice.

“But he thinks I’ve made a mistake.” Martha felt the heat of his disappointment and regret, though he’d never said those words exactly.

Her mom replied, “You know how he is. He’s so set in his ways. You had a successful career—something you worked incredibly hard for—and yet you just left it all behind.”

Martha detected a hint of reproach in her mother’s voice, though she could be wrong. Her mom had been completely understanding and encouraging of this decision once she fully grasped Martha’s determination to do it. A part of her mom might even relate to her daughter. That Martha wanted to change her life before she got too old, too stuck in her ways to make the most of a move to a rural area.

But it wasn’t a want. This was something more than that. It was a need. For months...maybe years...there had been a nagging voice inside her head, one that kept reminding Martha of the emptiness that resided in her soul.

She could have stayed, kept working the same job, climbing the ladder of success, but to what end? On the day she retired, Martha would have gone back to that same empty apartment in a city she’d grown to hate. It didn’t feel like home anymore. That’s why she’d decided to leave. It was time. It was time to take a leap of faith, to venture out and explore uncharted paths. Whatever happened, she’d take it all in her stride, even if it meant she’d fail miserably and crash and burn.

“I didn’t just walk away.” Martha’s belligerent attitude wouldn’t improve the situation. She didn’t want to get into a fight with her mother.

“I know.” Her mom sighed. “I know how tough this decision was, and so does your father. Deep down, he knows you gave this move a lot of thought.”

“I did.” Martha’s voice faltered as she drew in a shaky breath and fixed her gaze on the flames, feeling tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

“He worries about you.” Her mom sighed. “We both do. But you’re his little girl, no matter how old you get.”

And there it was. The truth that Martha hadn’t been able to understand, and her father had been unable to express. He’d wrapped his fears in warnings meant to discourage her from pursuing her aspirations.

“I know you do,” she whispered.

“The difference between me and your father is that I know how strong you are and what you are capable of.” Her mom chuckled. “Maybe it’s because I’m a woman, too. We have to be strong in ways that your dad will never understand.”

“He’s not exactly in touch with his feminine side, is he?” Martha spoke hesitantly, her voice softening as her mind grasped her father’s perspective.

“No, he’s not.” Her mom fell silent for a moment and then she said, “You and he are very much alike.”

“Are we?” Martha’s stomach knotted as she anticipated her mom’s next words. She so desperately wanted to fix things with her dad. For that to happen, she knew she needed to be open and understanding, even if it hurt to hear what her mom said. She had to accept the truth and hope he’d do the same.

“You are both strong and stubborn. It’s why you have had such successful careers. You have to be convinced that you are right. How else will a judge and jury believe you otherwise?” Martha stared out the window at the snow-dusted evergreens as her mother’s words sank in. She didn’t have to try to make sense of it—the truth was there, shining bright and clear in front of her, like the sun glimmering over the snow.

“You’re right.” Martha felt the defeat and frustration inside her, like a storm slowly brewing. She wanted to fight her corner, to make her father understand why she had made this decision. Martha knew she was doing something right for herself. She had taken a leap of faith and it was up to her to make sure that it paid off in the end.

Martha’s mom’s voice trembled. “Find a way to make peace with him, Martha. I’m begging you, for all our sakes.” She paused, pleading with her daughter. “I love you, sweetheart. Please think about what I said.”

Martha swallowed, the lump in her throat growing bigger with every word. “I love you, too, Mom. Tell Dad I love him, too...and that I miss him.”

“I will.” Her mother’s last words had been barely more than a whisper, edged in pain and sorrow.

The tears that had been held back for far too long spilled down Martha’s cheeks, but she refused to be deterred from her path—the one her heart insisted she followed, no matter what the price. With a deep breath, she put her dreams first and was determined to make them come true.

But she was determined to make things right with her father. Someday, maybe he’d finally be proud of who she’d become. And maybe—just maybe—he’d eventually be able to express his approval of this new version of his daughter.