14. Tabby

FOURTEEN

TABBY

I woke up to the smell of bacon and panting breaths in my face, slowly coming to until I jolted upright, barely escaping a lick from Lucy.

“Ugh.” I pushed her away. “Your breath is rank.”

“She could probably say the same about you.”

I blinked a few times and pushed my hair out of the way, meeting Nate’s impish grin. He was dressed, his green T-shirt soaked at the collar, smelling of his soap and sweat.

“What time is it?” I asked, as he offered me a plate of bacon, scrambled eggs, and toast with butter.

“Almost nine.”

“In the morning?”

“In the morning,” he affirmed and pushed a glass of orange juice into my hand.

I remembered what we’d done in his office last night at Walt’s, what I’d promised, then how I’d come home, washed my face, brushed my teeth, took off my jeans, and got into bed, intent on watching television until he came home. “I fell asleep.”

He nodded. “Sure did.”

“You didn’t wake me up.”

He shook his head. “Sure didn’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re growing a human, and if you’re tired, you need to sleep.”

“Yeah, but…”

I didn’t feel guilty, but I did feel a little let down. We’d been living together, sleeping in the same bed, for almost a week now, and quite frankly, he‘d promised me sex. Told me he’d be taking care of it for me, yet here I was with bed head and wild hormones, while he stood there looking all deliciously sweaty after making me breakfast.

As if he understood my thoughts, he pinched my Walt’s T-shirt, which I still wore from last night. It didn’t feel real nice with the way it was caked to my chest.

He bit back a laugh. “You’re such a fucking horndog.”

“Me?” I slapped at his shoulder. “You were the one who told me to be ready for you to clean me up.”

“So, hurry up and eat your breakfast so I can clean you up.” He picked up a piece of bacon and held it out to me. Lucy tried to snatch it, but he caught her and set her on the floor, where she trotted to her bed in the corner. After I bit into the bacon, he did too, basically finishing off the strip. I rolled my eyes as I sipped my OJ.

“How was the rest of the night?” I asked, starting in on the eggs with the fork he handed to me along with a napkin. Like a Boy Scout, the man was always prepared.

He helped himself to some of my juice. “Something’s up with the vents. They were blowing cold air.”

I frowned. “What’s that about?”

“No idea. Might be nothing. I’ll have to wait and see if it happens again.” He sounded relaxed even though he tugged at his hair, his nervous tell.

“Or it could be an expensive fix?” I guessed, and he sighed.

“Yep.”

“And not at a great time,” I added, knowing he had plans for the second location already in motion.

He polished off another piece of bacon, and I bit into a triangle of brown toast. “No, but maybe it was a fluke.” He motioned for me to keep eating. “Hurry up. I want to shower.”

“I can’t shove food into my mouth like you can.”

He winked. “Right. Only my dick.”

“Like you can?” I arched my brow. “Tried sucking yourself off, have you?”

He batted at my mouth with my second piece of toast, mashing it against my lips until I laughed, allowing him to stuff it into my mouth. I leaned back, almost spilling my juice in the process, earning a grunt of displeasure as if this were all my fault.

I shook my head, settling back into my spot, my orange juice safe. “You must’ve been such a little shit as a kid. Always making trouble.”

He lay on his side, propping his head up with his hand. “Actually, no. I was a pretty stereotypical firstborn boy. I mean…I’m sure Evie will tell you I was an asshole and pushed her around, but that was my job.”

I finished off the rest of the eggs. “A pushy asshole? Yes, that sounds familiar.”

He jostled my leg. “What were you like as a kid?”

I hummed in thought. “Quiet.”

“Surprise, surprise.”

I tore off a piece of toast and lobbed it at him. It pinged off his forehead and landed on the sheets. He tossed it into his mouth with a smile. “Will you tell me now?”

“Tell you what?” I placed my empty glass on the nightstand.

“Your whole story.” When I grimaced, he motioned between us. “One for one. Yours for mine.”

I supposed we had to get it all out at some point, so I agreed with a shrug. “You first.”

He pointed to the last piece of toast. “Finish that. So, my dad worked all the time. When I was little, I didn’t know any better, but then I got older and started seeing all my friends’ dads around and hanging out with them, and I was, like, what the hell ? I didn’t understand why my dad wasn’t throwing the football around with me. We weren’t taking weekend camping trips. None of that. Whenever I asked him, he always had an excuse, he didn’t know how to play football, we didn’t own the equipment to go camping, he didn’t have time to go to the movies, whatever, whatever. Once I got to high school, it was pretty obvious he was checked out. My parents always argued, even when we were little. They didn’t hide it. My mom was a yeller, but my dad never said anything. Me and Evie could probably reenact their arguments word for word.”

He sat up and pitched his voice higher, “ I don’t get you, Tim. Why do you even come home if you’re not going to do anything around here? Your kids don’t even know what you look like .”

Then he dipped his chin, lowering his face. “ Goddamn it, Shannon. I’m leaving .”

I winced. “Is that what happened? He said he was leaving one day?”

Nate huffed a derisive laugh. “He said that every day. My dad wasn’t happy. Nothing made him happy—not work, and definitely not us—and I took it personally. Like I wasn’t making him happy. It had to be me. I know that’s not true now, but back then, I didn’t know what I was doing wrong. I blamed myself.”

I understood. Though it wasn’t at all the same, I often blamed myself for things that happened in my life over which I had no control. Sometimes we were our own worst enemy. I reached for Nate’s hand, lacing our fingers together. “So, what happened?”

“He did eventually leave for good and married Summer, who I told you about. They have two kids, and he apparently has time for them. He takes them on vacations, he takes time off work. He’s even planning on retiring soon to, you know…be with his family.”

My hackles rose, irate on Nate’s behalf. I knew what it felt like to be left behind, and I hated that for him. For the boy he had been and the man he was now.

“So,” he went on, idly picking at my nail polish, my food long finished, “my mom tried to overcompensate. She did everything for us, was at every game, recital, everything, which was nice, but she also used me and Evie as pawns. Especially me. Before Dad left, I remember her saying shit like Look, look at how you’re making Nathan cry. And no twelve-year-old boy wants it pointed out how much he’s crying, you know?”

I moved closer to him, almost in his lap, combing my fingers through his beard. “Yeah. Instead of helping you, she made the situation worse.”

His hands found my waist, fingers restless against my skin. “Yeah, and after he left, she’d shove it in our faces about how much she did for us and how little Dad did. If there was one good thing my father did, he never made it a competition. There was never one between my sister and me or him and my mom. So, I guess there are perks to caring so little.”

Sitting directly in Nate’s lap, I wrapped my arms around his neck and tucked my face into his throat. “And yet you care so much. You’re not your dad. I know you’re afraid you’re like him, but you’re not. You won’t be like him.”

He smoothed his hand down my hair and spine, over and over, until he eventually caught my chin in his fingers, kissing my mouth sweetly, a silent sign of gratitude. It wasn’t a chore to listen. I liked learning about him.

As much as he liked learning about me. And I wasn’t getting out of it, because he reminded me, “Your turn.”

I ducked my head down and whined into his shoulder. “Do I have to?”

“Do you want an orgasm?”

I jerked back, jaw dropped. “You would withhold orgasms from a pregnant woman?”

He tipped his head. “Try me.”

I flopped back against the pillows, scowling at him. “Fine.”

He cuddled up next to me, sneaking his hand under my T-shirt to span my belly. Frogger, of course, poked at him, and I rubbed at where I thought the head was.

“I’m not sure where to start,” I mused, and Nate teased his fingertips in circles on my skin.

“You left off at how you ended up here. You were in Virginia and…”

“Right.” I readjusted my pillow for no other reason than to waste time. Nate waited me out, and when there was nothing else left to do, I started, “My dad was transferred to Virginia, and we were there for a long time, until I was in fourth grade. We moved up here because he met Beth.”

“Guess we don’t like Beth, huh? You said it in your dragon voice.” He imitated my apparent dragon voice by making his all throaty. “Beeeeeeth.”

“Beth was… Well, she was a bitch. Is a bitch.”

He motioned for me to keep going, mouth trembling with amusement.

“When I first met her, she was nice and showed me pictures of her kids, and they were about my age, so I was really excited. For context, I used to watch a lot of TV Land, and I might have set my expectations a little high for what family life was like, okay? I thought, This is it . We were gonna be one big, happy family, and I’m going to have a brother and a sister. It was going to be awesome.”

Frowning, Nate guessed, “It wasn’t awesome?”

“We moved up here into a big house, and I went from being really close with my dad and seeing him all the time to him and Beth being together all the time. And her idea of parenting was giving us all ten bucks each and saying see ya later. I didn’t know anyone, I didn’t have any friends, and her kids basically bullied me. Veronica was one year older than me and just as bitchy as her mom. Joel was three years older and constantly picked on me, made fun of what I looked like, would steal my allowance, and eat all of my favorite snacks. He was an asshole.”

“What did your dad say?”

“At first, he told me it would get better, that we’d figure out how to be a family, siblings tease each other, and all that kind of stuff. But he saw Joel push me into the wall one day and yelled at him, which made Joel go crying to his mommy that the big bad stepdad had yelled at him. I don’t know what went down between Beth and my dad after that, but they didn’t speak to each other for a few days, and then she basically started ignoring me, which only made me feel like shit. I thought we were gonna be like Happy Days or The Brady Bunch or something, but instead, we were…

“Like a Lifetime movie,” Nate supplied, and I gave in to a pathetic laugh.

“Yes. We were a Lifetime movie. When I got to high school, it got worse with Veronica because my boobs were bigger than hers, and you can guess what the boys were like?—”

“Talking all kinds of gross shit about you?”

I nodded. “Veronica was jealous, as if I wanted that attention, and spread all kinds of rumors about me. The usual kind of mean-girl stuff—I was a slut, I once gave head to three guys in one night…”

Nate slanted his head, eyes wide. “Girls really say that about each other?”

“Sometimes, yeah. The easiest way to bring a girl low is to label her as a slut. Works every time.”

He grimaced. “That’s awful.”

I took a deep breath, continuing, “And then my dad died. A few days before I was supposed to take my driver’s ed test.”

“Jesus, Tab. I’m so sorry.”

I blinked away the sting in my eyes. “From that point on, I was basically a pariah in the house, but Beth couldn’t throw me out because what would people say? ”

“It was the very least she could do,” he said, and I nodded.

“I knew Danny from a few of my classes in school, and we started dating pretty soon after my dad died. I was looking for…”

Nate handed me a tissue when I sniffed. “I get it.”

“Danny’s family was really nice. They were religious and went to church on Sundays, but they also had family game nights and invited me for dinner all the time, and I loved being with them. I loved being a part of that, so when Danny said we should get married and go to college together, I thought it was a great idea.” I dabbed at my eyes. “We had a little ceremony and moved in to a tiny apartment over his family’s garage. It was… Well, you know the rest.”

Nate scooted up to take me in his arms, and I played at being annoyed at his sweat-soaked shirt. He only held me closer, tighter.

“We’re going to have to change the sheets,” I said into his throat.

“Oh, definitely. Especially after what I’m gonna do to you.”

I refused to laugh, even as his breathy chuckle tickled my ear.

We were both quiet for a minute, digesting all this new information we’d shared, our mutual desires for family. I understood why Nate would be turned off from being a parent, but he slid so easily into the role of provider and protector, it amazed me he never saw that in himself. But now that I had the full picture, I assumed it was more about the echo of not feeling good enough than it was about his fear.

Because he’d conquered that quite soundly and knew almost more about this baby and pregnancy than I did.

“You know,” he said eventually, catching my gaze, “I had it wrong.”

“Had what wrong?”

“I always thought you had Maleficent vibes, but you’re actually the princess.”

I scoffed. “What?”

“You’re Cinderella with the evil stepmom.”

I wrinkled my nose. “I like Maleficent better. She can turn into a dragon and light her enemies on fire.”

He nodded sagely. “I’ll light your enemies on fire for you, princess.”

I bit my cheeks, but a smile snuck through, and his eyes lit up in delight that he’d gotten me again. “Now, come on. Let Prince Charming show you how good he can fuck you.”

He scooped me up and carried me to the bathroom, Lucy happily following us. He set me down, and I promptly brushed my teeth while he turned the shower on and shoved Lucy back out the door, muttering, “Go lie down, Luce. I’m about to defile your mother.”

I bent over to spit into the sink, and Nate immediately pressed the position advantage, thrusting his half-hard cock against my ass, his hands curling around my hips. “I’m not finished yet,” I mumbled with suds in my mouth, but he didn’t care, sinking his hands below my underwear to spread my pussy open, delving his fingers inside without any warm-up.

He smiled at my reflection. “Gotta love those morning spikes in your hormones, huh?”

I finished brushing, and he pushed the cotton down my legs and helped me to step out of them before tossing them into the laundry basket, my work shirt following, leaving me completely naked.

He stared, his gaze slowly trekking over me, pausing at my breasts, my stomach, and my legs, then finally returning to my eyes. “You’re so beautiful.”

I’d been complimented my whole life. A generic white girl face with big boobs and a naturally small waist will do that, make come-ons and catcalls commonplace. But Nate’s honest words landed different, a direct hit to the soft spot I’d just exposed to him. He knew everything about me now, and he still thought I was beautiful. Even with my melodramatic past and growing stretch marks.

Maybe because of them.

With how he tenderly held my face between his hands to kiss me, it certainly felt that way.

He helped me step into the shower, leaving the curtain open as he stripped naked, permitting me a view of his sculpted backside as he placed his clothes in the laundry. I knew he attended a seven a.m. class every morning, and the idea of flirty Nate laughing and joking with women as he got all hot and bothered, doing whatever it was CrossFit people did—throw tires or something—made my dragon side want to light things on fire.

He stepped into the shower, turning so the spray hit his back, and tugged me to him, his feet on either side of mine, his erection nestled between us. “What’s the mean mug for?”

“You have women in your workout class?”

“Usually a few. One of the coaches is a woman. Why?”

“You ever take your shirt off there?”

His brow furrowed, that lock of hair curling in the humidity. “If I ever get really hot. Why? I don’t—Oh! You’re jealous. Tabitha Jean Reynolds, you jealous little shrew.” His fingertips dug into my sides, his features utterly pleased. “You gonna fight for my honor? Power up with the baby and start swinging. Karate chops and roundhouse kicks all over the place.”

“No.” I rolled my eyes. But… We hadn’t discussed exclusivity. I’d assumed, but we were still very new, no matter how long coming it had been.

“Fuck, princess.” He bent to suck at my throat. “The idea of you kicking somebody’s ass because you’re jealous is so hot.”

I pushed him, my hands on his chest. “Please don’t make me play the role of jealous girlfriend.”

He shook his head seriously, the twinkle of glee in his eyes gone. “Never. It’s you and me now.”

I chewed on my cheek, this time not to cry.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he promised, and I couldn’t contain my tears anymore. He wiped them away, though it didn’t matter with the shower spray. “I’m always going to be here. That’s one thing you never need to worry about.” He stuck his tongue out, swiping it over the tip of my nose. “I’ve licked you, so you’re mine.”