Chapter 5

five

Two years later

T WO YEARS HAD passed since the tragic Theatre Royal incident, and what had changed in Angeline's life? Almost nothing.

She still lived in London in the same house, she was still a spinster, and her mama was still the dirty secret of many, many rich and powerful men. After many promises, broken promises, many ‘ this is the last time I blackmail someone, I swear it ,' and several nervous breakdowns, Mama's blackmailing enterprise was still up and running.

Two years ago, Angeline and her mother had been forced to leave London in a hurry after Mama had bedded and blackmailed the wrong man. What His Grace Dimitri Gruzinsky, Grand Duke of all the Russias, lacked in sense of humour, he made up for in absolute rage. Not at all intimidated by Mama's compromising photographs, damning documents, and threats to expose him to his Grand Duchess, he'd gone berserk and sworn to kill Mama and Angeline, burn down their house, curse their souls to hell, and declare war on Britain.

Now she understood why Napoleon had so miserably failed to conquer Great Mother Russia. He had all her sympathy.

And to think she'd considered Mr. Alexander to be short-tempered. He was an amateur compared to the Grand Duke.

After Angeline's last visit to Mr. Alexander, she and her mother had left London at night like thieves and hadn't returned until His Disgrace had grown tired of searching for them and returned to his gilded palace in Saint Petersburg.

Angeline had hoped that such a close brush with death and months spent running from one small town to another would have prompted Mama to change. But no. The only change was that Mama had taken to studying medicinal herbs and potions with more passion, becoming a true expert. She'd also become close friends with an Austrian physician, a Dr. Karl Bauer, who had taught her everything about medicinal plants from all around the world.

But that was the only significant change in her mother's routine. Angeline started to believe Mama was addicted to her paid tumbles and blackmail business. She also suspected Mama couldn't stop lying.

On top of everything else, she hadn't seen Mr. Alexander since their last chess game. Busy hiding from the deranged grand duke, she hadn't dared send a message to Mr. Alexander for fear it could fall into the wrong hands.

The only thing she knew about him was that his eyes had healed. Aside from that, she had no idea where he was and what he was doing since the newspapers had stopped talking about him. No, she knew something else. He didn't work for Lord Havisham anymore.

For some reason, she missed him. He'd dragged her out of the burning theatre, and she hadn't been able to see him again. Worse, he likely believed her sudden absence was due to their last encounter when she'd asked him to dance and he'd raised his voice. But between angry Russian aristocrats and Mama's intrigues, she'd lost contact with London's society for a while.

Since they'd returned, Mama had been determined to make up for the lost time by attending every party, afternoon tea, and soirée, no matter how small or insignificant.

Sitting in the carriage that was taking her to Lady Redvers's house, Angeline tugged at the neckline of her silk gown. The devil kept slipping lower, even though she breathed slowly. If she sneezed, she'd undress herself. Her gloves, instead, were particularly long and thick. The burn had left an ugly, bumpy scar on her arm too many people found revolting. If she was going to be honest, she found it revolting, too. It'd taken her months to get used to the feel of the rough skin under her fingers whenever she'd touched the scar. It looked like a snake had sunbathed for too long.

"Stop fiddling with your neckline." Mama swatted her hand.

"I'm practically naked. I might as well remove the bodice altogether."

"Don't be silly." Mama tightened the silk sash around her shoulders. She shifted on the seat, glanced out of the window, shifted again, and glanced outside the other window.

Angeline had seen that circumspect behaviour during the days of the Russian incident, and she didn't like it.

"Tell me the truth," she said. "Are we being followed? Is it the grand duke again?"

Mama let out a nervous chuckle. "No, no. Silly you. Everything is fine."

"No, it's not. Tell me the truth, or I won't come with you to Lady Redvers's ball. Oh goodness. Did you blackmail Lord Redvers? Is he one of your gentlemen?"

"Heavens, no. I didn't do business with him. It was his brother. Very nice man. I mean he's nice for a man. Anyway, it's thanks to him that we've been invited."

Business was a nice way to call blackmail.

"What is it, then?" she asked.

Mama smoothed a crease on her skirt. "I'm afraid you'll be angry with me."

"Tell me," she gritted out. "Every conversation that starts with that line leads to a disaster."

Mama took her time, keeping her gaze low. "There's a gentleman I want you to meet."

Angeline held her breath in surprise. A suitor? Had Mama finally agreed to help her find a husband? Could she finally think of settling down with a family of her own?

On impulse, she grabbed Mama's hand. "I'm so glad you changed your mind about my search for a husband. There's nothing, nothing I want more than to become a wife and a mother, take care of my family, and be surrounded by love. Oh, I'd love to have a couple of dogs as well, and a cat, of course. Cats are such clever animals."

"Stop it." Mama arched a single eyebrow. "I might cast up my accounts."

"Well, you have your tastes. I have mine. But I'm looking forward to meeting potential suitors."

"Angeline—"

"I want to marry for love. I want a husband I truly love and who loves me back. No marriage of convenience. And someone who wants children. I'd love a big family."

"Angeline!" Mama raised her voice. "Mr. Oscar North, the man I want to introduce you to, isn't and will never, ever be your suitor, not as long as I breathe, and if I were dead, I'd become a ghost and haunt his house to prevent him from courting you."

"Do you have to be so dramatic?" Angeline scoffed. "I don't understand."

"He saw you a few days ago walking in the park with me. He didn't stop to chat because he was in a hurry, but your beauty struck him."

It was Angeline's turn to arch her eyebrow. She didn't consider herself unattractive, but a man who got struck by her beauty with one passing glance at her sounded suspicious, to say the least. Not to mention that even those men who'd shown an interest in her had quickly changed their minds when they'd seen her scar on her arm left by the burn. Comments like ‘What's that thing? Is it contagious? Can't you take it off?' still echoed in her ears.

Angeline stared at her mother. "Is he one of your gentlemen?"

"Since you ask, yes. I've never blackmailed him, though, and our liaison is over."

"That's a relief. So he glanced at me. And?" she asked.

"He wants to meet you." Mama shrugged.

"And?" she prompted.

"If he likes you, he proposes to…" The rest of the sentence was gibberish so quickly her mother spoke.

Angeline didn't understand a single word. "What? Speak English. Please."

Mama released a long breath. "He would like you to become his mistress."

She couldn't have heard that correctly. "Mistress?"

"For one night only. Don't worry." Mama waved a hand as if what she'd said didn't matter.

"Don't worry?" Angeline shouted. "What have you done? What did you tell him? I swear I'll throw myself out of this carriage right this instant if you made a deal with Mr. North about my body."

Mama opened her mouth, but she was cut off.

"Madam?" the driver said from the box. "Is everything all right?"

"Lower your voice." Mama turned towards the window. "All fine, thank you, Smith."

"Nothing is fine. How could you?" She was so angry she couldn't talk without stuttering. "You sold me. My virginity."

"Now, who's being dramatic? Stop it, for goodness's sake," Mama hissed.

"I can't breathe." She gasped, a hand on her heaving chest. Even her sight darkened at the edges.

"You ninny. Stop this nonsense and listen to me before you have a fit." Mama sat next to her and gave her a light slap on the back. As if selling her daughter's virginity to a stranger weren't enough.

The slap wasn't strong, but Angeline had to admit she breathed a little better. Her wrath was intact though. She shook with outrage.

Mama soothed the spot she'd slapped. "I don't want that man's dirty hands on you, and I swear on my honour?—"

"Choose something else to swear on."

"He won't have a tumble with you, not him, not anyone else you don't choose," Mama said with a fierceness that was too honest not to be taken seriously. "Unless you fancy him, of course. In that case, it's your choice."

A headache bothered her. "If you don't want me to have a tumble with this Mr. North, then why meet him?"

Mama leant closer and whispered, "In case Mr. North decides he wants a more carnal meeting with you, I'll organise everything so that he'll only believe he had a tumble with you, but it'll be an illusion, a magic trick. Still, he'll be absolutely convinced he spent a night with you, and he'll pay a hefty sum for the honour. In fact, I've never spent a night in bed with him. He believes he did, but it's not true."

"How?" She was so shocked she didn't think straight anymore because she wanted to know what Mama had in mind.

"Dr. Bauer developed a few drugs to cure the maladies of the mind, a so-called alienist, and I learnt from him. With the right mixture of drugs, the right technique, and the right dosage, I can make Mr. North believe he's the queen. Hallucinogens are powerful allies." Mama raised her eyebrows.

"Somehow, I don't feel reassured. In fact, I might throw up."

"Darling." Mama took her chin. "I know what I'm doing. The whole procedure has been tested, tried, and perfected several times."

"Good Lord." Angeline put a shivering hand on her cheek. "You've been drugging unaware people to test Dr. Bauer's drugs. Those people could have died. Honestly, every time I think you've reached the lowest of the low, you surprise me."

"Tosh. Dr. Bauer supervised the dosage. In fact, we have a prolific partnership. He teaches me about the latest developments in the drug field, and I test the potions. Everything has always gone beautifully. The drug mixture has always worked to perfection… alas, with one notable exception."

"The grand duke," they said together.

Mama exhaled dramatically as if she were the wronged one. "The mixture of drugs, Dr. Bauer called it poly, quite unoriginal if you ask me. Anyway, the poly didn't do anything to that blasted duke. What a pain in the neck. I had to really lie in bed with him. Not that he was a terrible lover. He had great technique."

"Mama, please."

"But I've never met a more unbearable man." Mama shook her head.

Angeline sighed. "That's true. He was such a— you're distracting me. I have no intention of drugging and blackmailing Mr. North."

"There won't be any blackmailing, only the drugging," Mama said in an outraged tone as if Angeline had said something offensive. "He has only to believe he was with you. That's all."

"No."

"At least meet him."

"I don't think it's a good idea."

"His income of fifty thousand pounds per year is a very good idea." Mama fixed a wayward curl of Angeline's hair. "Mr. North is a bumbling idiot, easily manipulated, the best kind of man. All you have to do is smile, bat your eyelashes, and he'll fall at your feet. Also, he's rather handsome, and as I said, you won't have to do anything. He'll pay a hefty sum for the fake privilege of being with you, and you two will go separate ways without him being any the wiser."

"What if he tries to touch me tonight?" Getting out of the carriage was an idea that didn't lose its appeal.

"Well, it's up to you, of course. But he might want to touch you a little bit, be more intimate. Of course, you won't allow him to do anything too improper." For once, Mama's tone sounded like that of a proper, match-making mama.

"Good heaven." Angeline rubbed a tight spot between her eyebrows. "You promised you would stop. Instead, you simply changed your brand."

Mama smiled. "Thank you. Every good business evolves."

"It wasn't a compliment."

The carriage jolted to a stop, and a flare of panic caused her to still. Now she had to leave the carriage, enter Lady Redvers's brilliantly illuminated house, and be in the same room as Mr. North.

She touched her scarred arm. "I can't do this, Mama. I absolutely can't do it. It's wrong. I won't discuss the matter further."

The footman opened the door. "Madam, miss, Lady Redvers's residence."

Mama snatched Angeline's hand and turned towards the footman. "Shut the door. We'll be ready in a few moments."

The startled man did as told.

"I love you, darling. I really do. That's why I'm sparing you from a gruesome, hard life. When I became the mistress of several lords, I didn't have any potion to help me out on long nights. I had to lie in bed with them even when they disgusted me." Her cheeks flushed. "I did it for you, for us, to feed you, clothe you, and keep a roof over our heads. You won't have to endure the smelly breath of a heavy man on top of you or experience the humiliation of being treated like nothing. Never. I don't want that for you. I have never have. I'll personally kill anyone who dares to hurt you. But you must help me. You must sacrifice a piece of your integrity to lead a life of safety and leisure."

Angeline's heart broke. Her mama had endured a miserable life all alone. First, her husband had hurt and abandoned her. Then she'd sold herself to earn money and keep her daughter alive. What really hurt Angeline was the fact Mama hadn't told her anything. If it hadn't been for the darned fire, Mama would have kept lying.

Yes, things hadn't changed much since Mama's confession, but at least now Angeline was aware of all the horrible things Mama had done for her. Guilt bugged her like a noisy fly. For years, she'd enjoyed a happy, carefree life without having the foggiest idea of what Mama did. But Mama didn't have to keep doing anything. Angeline was an adult. She would work, beg, and do anything to keep Mama out of the clutches of men who wanted to pay to spend a night with her.

A sickening lump crawled into Angeline's throat. "We've been going in circles about your idea of safety many times. We have enough money to leave this life of lies behind."

"No, we don't. Why do I need to hire a footman and a coachman for one night? Because we can't afford to pay them regularly. We'd be broke in a matter of months."

"I don't care." She couldn't completely remove the frustration from her voice. "We don't need a footman. We only need a place to live and food. I can work."

Besides, being aware that everything she owned— from the gown she was wearing to her umbrella —came from Mama's illegal money was a constant burden.

"Twaddle." Mama scoffed. "How do you think I lasted this long in this business? I never demand huge sums for my silence when I blackmail my prey. If I didn't do that, they would turn against me. Instead, I'm never greedy. I ask for an affordable payment, nothing that would be too conspicuous. The downside is that I must keep going, and I'm not getting any younger. And if you think it's easy for a woman to find a proper job, think again. I tried and failed."

"I don't want to spend my life like that." She sounded ungrateful.

Her mama had made unthinkable sacrifices to stay alive. Angeline had received a good education and had always enjoyed the freedom to do whatever she wanted, from learning to use the bow to riding and attending concerts. But the path Mama offered was a miserable one.

Mama continued. "As I said, trust me. My poly potion really works. When the moment comes, Mr. North will believe he had a tumble with you."

"No." She was growing tired of saying it.

"At least talk and meet him. Who knows? You might like him. Don't humiliate me by refusing to even talk to him." Mama opened the door. "We're ready," she said to the footman.

No, Angeline wasn't.