4. Aurora

CHAPTER 4

Aurora

Present Day –

Heavy tones ring out from my amplifier as I jam out on my guitar. The main riffs from Avenged Sevenfold's "Hail to the King" fill my room and probably most of the house and yard. The tones make the glass in the windows vibrate with each cord I hit. The song speaks to me about things to come, about things that could have been. Playing music is how I work through the vast span of time that I've lived through. For the last two hundred and twenty-eight years, we've always been on the move. Never have I been able to call a house a home or a section of woods my territory.

My wolf grows restless as time goes on, feeling more like a listless rogue than the Alpha I am meant to become. My guardians keep me isolated from most of the world for my own safety because of who I was born to be. I am the last Lycan Princess destined to reclaim my mother's throne from the Strigoi. No pressure, right? Music has always helped me work through all the anger that has built up over the past decades. Why am I so angry? One may wonder. Well, let's see here. An ancient evil murdered my family, took over my kingdom, and because of that, I'm stuck in some fucked up witness protection program.

The last hundred years have been the most difficult. Not only do I have dreams of battles I've never fought in, but I've also started dreaming of a man that looks like a Viking, who has been teaching me how to fight in my dreams. The man in my dreams has long white hair as I do, and his eyes are the same steel-gray as mine. I believe him to be a relative or an ancestor of mine. His lessons are in images and actions; I never hear his voice, but instinctively I know what he's trying to convey. From the descriptions Dimitri has given me, I believe the man in my dreams is the lost Dragon King. But why would I be dreaming of him? The lessons I've learned are quite useful. Hell, I've used some of this new knowledge against Dimitri in some of our sparring sessions.

I stop playing as Andre drops off a new cup of tea from Elena. Something about this tea takes the edge off of everything. Sipping my tea slowly, I start thinking of Dimitri; I have a major crush on him. Like really bad. My wolf is convinced he's ours; though, I'm not so sure. Shouldn't I feel something towards him as well? I mean, I do love him, and that love has changed from father-figure to friend; and with the urging of my wolf, it's a little more than it used to be. If he were ours, he wouldn't go out to be intimate with other females. Maybe it's just a first love crush that eventually I'll forget ever happened. Then again, I admit it; I'm jealous. Angry even... Though honestly, I'm not sure if it's just the mystical bond that makes me think I love him. It's probably because I'm always so lonely. Sighing deeply, I switch songs to something a little sad to fit my heartache.

My fingers trace the length of the scar that, over time, seems to have stretched as I grew. I find myself staring at this mystical lo-jack. What male in his right mind would want to be bound to a baby? Dimitri is kind of stuck with me because of the Elder Dame's magic that binds us. Dimitri's and Andre's lives are directly tied to mine, thus extending their lifespans far beyond what it should have been. Andre, I had found out, was attached to Dimitri because of their jobs. So when Dimitri was bound to me, Andre had been roped in—to a lesser extent. How fucked up is that?

I wonder what will happen to them when I choose my first mate and the bond is broken. Will they instantly die? Or will they slowly age like ordinary people? Lost within a sea of emotions, I almost miss feeling Dimitri coming closer before I see him. He must be sensing the turmoil within me at the moment. Sometimes I can't stand to look him in the eyes. I know he sneaks into town to take care of his needs, I feel it—probably the cruelest part of this binding. He gets to share my lifespan, and I get the eternal pain of knowing when he gets laid.

Speaking of the bear, there he is in the doorway; looking at me, sipping his tea, and trying to discern my mood. "Aurora, are you okay, love? You feel like a maelstrom of emotions." He tilts his head to the left and studies me more. His eyes glow a gold-tone, signs that his bear is flaring to the surface. Honestly, lately, I've enjoyed the bear's company more than his. Dimitri is a rather large man in stature in comparison to Andre. Think of the guys from the strongman competitions, and that's D. His honey-brown hair and matching hazel eyes make him appear as if he's very approachable. His current expression betrays his concern because of my mood. The air shifts slightly, and a new scent is blown my way. Instantly my beast becomes a raging mess; it's another female in her territory. I sit my guitar down and stand up. Slowly, stalking towards him, sniffing the air. Panic streaks across his face; he knows what I smell, and a deep guttural growl escapes my curled lips.

My wolf makes her presence known as my canines lengthen while I assess him. I see Andre coming over his shoulder, running towards us before he skids to a stop halfway down the hallway. Slowly, turning my attention back to Dimitri. I find myself not even a foot away from him, my nostrils flaring.

"How dare you!" Baring my canines at him, "Entering my den smelling of some whore!" I growl. I am literally shaking, trying to keep from ripping him apart. My snow-white fur ripples up and down my arms as my beast demands retribution. "It's bad enough I fucking feel every time you get off. I don't need to smell her too," I seethed through clenched teeth. "My wolf wants her head and her blood on our talons. You may have signed that bitches death warrant just 'cause you wanted to get your dick wet," I snarl and feel my hands shift and lengthen into talons. Flexing my hands several times, my eyes are fixated on my talons' sharp planes, imagining them covered in blood. Raising my gaze slowly, I watch his face visibly pales as he takes several steps back with his hands up in a pacifying manner.

"I didn't know Aurora…" He gulps, eyes wide as saucers. "I didn't know you could feel that?" He looks honestly horrified and remorseful at his actions. Shaking his head slowly, a single tear breaks free from his left eye and rolls down his cheek. I've never seen a sign of weakness from the big guy. Hell, he's six foot five and over four hundred pounds of solid muscle. I've never seen him cry. Hell, I never in a million years thought I'd see him cry.

"I'd love to say it's fine, but it's not. I've been dealing with this for the last hundred years." I take a deep breath and push my wolf to the back of my mind as I turn and walk to the other side of my room. "Please, leave... go shower, burn those clothes... Fuck... just please leave... I can't deal with this right now." My voice breaks as I utter the last half of the statement. My heart feels as if it's in a vice being crushed.

Fuck, I was ready to cry. I hate fucking crying. I wipe my eyes, trying to hide my pain. How many times can my heart get broken before my damned wolf will give up on the bear that honestly doesn't want us? After a few moments, I hear a sniffled "sorry" and listen to Dimitri walk off. I remain standing rigid, trying to show no signs of weakness even though I feel my world come down around me. A softer set of footsteps enter my den and slowly approach. I know it's Andre, and I lower my head in defeat and relax my stance considerably. "Hi, Andre," escapes my lips far softer than I anticipated.

"Baby girl. I'm so sorry this is hurting you so badly." He hesitates as he starts to reach out to me, then stops himself. "Why didn't you say anything to him? Or to me?" He sighs softly. "I would have talked to him and let him know what you're going through." Andre was distraught; he's the best friend I could ever ask for. He slowly approaches me, his movements careful and calculated, making sure not to set my wolf off. His lithe hand gently rests on my shoulder and rubs softly, trying to comfort me.

"Why would I take away his freedom and his choice?" Raising my eyebrows, I open my eyes wide. "I'm the one that must wait for my first heat to come into my full power." My emotions are a mess as tears freely roll down my cheeks in frustration. "I'm the one who must wait until then to start choosing my mates and gaining power. No one needs to share my hell with me. No one needs to suffer as I do." Wrapping my arms tightly around my stomach, I slowly turn my head to look into his eyes; he seems just as sad as I feel.

"Baby girl, we are here for you. I am here for you," Andre says with so much conviction. "I'll talk to the big guy. Why don't you go hunting? You know that will make you feel better." Andre motions back to the kitchen. "Elena sent us another care package, I'll leave it for you to open later."

As usual, Andre is right. Hunting will clear my head, and I can take my aggression out on my dinner. "Okay, I'll be back by nightfall." Slowly, I turn fully and kiss him on his forehead. "You have been a wonderful father, Andre." I had to let him know how much I appreciate him. I smile weakly at him before moving off to get ready to hunt.

I start stripping off my clothes as I head out of my sliding glass door. As my feet hit the grass, the shift takes me quickly. My bones break and grow and shift alignment. My muscles stretch and gain in mass, my arms and legs elongate, and my knees break and bend backward. Thick, white fur covers my body as the final changes take place. Last to change are my fingernails that grow to look like long-hooked talons. Tiny, silver-white, scale-like growths surround them. It seems that with each shift I go through as I get older, more and more white scales appear. My muzzle is longer and broader than the average Lycan. The boney prominence on my muzzle is raised, unlike any wolf I have ever seen. My skull is broader and thicker, with long pointed ears. Almost all eight feet of Lycan stretches out before I start moving towards the woods. Unlike other wolves, I'm bipedal—like the werewolves of horror movies, but bigger and scarier. I'm a freak, and I know it. I kind of like being unique; it makes me feel special. I would almost say I was an albino, but I tan every summer, so that thought is out of the question.

I haven't ever seen another Lycan like me. Then again, I've only ever seen one other. Our friend Elena is also Lycan, but her fur is black as night. She says that's the natural color for our species coat. It makes me wonder if the Alpha, my mother's first mate, was my father or if one of the other males is my sire. The shit you think about to distract you from heartache. Logically, the Alpha couldn't be. I mean, his fur was black like my mother's.

I take a running start and leap up into the air to sink my talons into the cliff-face and start climbing. The cliff's face is a vertical climb and so worth the strain to get to the top. I've been climbing this cliff for the last few years—to be honest, it's gotten relatively easy. The area I want to hunt in is on the other side of this divide. Reaching the top, I haul myself over and creep on all fours to look down into the valley below. My liquid-mercury eyes lock onto a herd of deer in the distance, moving towards the lake. It's a good-sized herd for this time of year. There's a decent blend of old and young deer, which usually means the herd is healthy. Calculating the distance to the large oak tree, I take a running start and leap through the air flying towards my target.

Landing softly, my talons sink deeply into the tree's bark. I scan the perimeter and plan the next several jumps needed to be within striking distance. One last jump and I'm at a fork in the trail where the deer should cross. The wind is blowing from behind them into my face; the wind is perfect for my attack. A roar sounds in the distance, scaring the herd and sending them running. Okay, now I'm genuinely pissed off. There went my mother fucking hunt. Something is going to die, so help me.

I remain in the tree, talons digging into the bark, as I wait to see what just ruined my fun. Then it hits me; Dimitri, or should I say his bear. The big guy is upset with its human counterpart. Personally, I can't blame the furball. I'm not overjoyed with his human side at the moment either. Ever so slowly, the bear lumbers its way towards my hiding spot. His snout lifting slightly in the air as his nostrils flair, trying to catch my scent. By the looks of it, he has sensed me and starts looking around for me. Silly bear never looks up. When he's close enough, I release my grip and fall to the ground about ten feet in front of his nose.

Landing in a crouched position, I look up at Dimitri's bear, who is now standing on his hind legs. Quickly, I launch myself at him, my shoulder catching his bear right under his ribcage, knocking him off balance. My momentum causes him to fall backward, allowing me to pin him on his back. My canines lightly press into the bear's throat, and I let off a soft, non-threatening growl. The bear releases its control of their body, and before I realize it, I have Dimitri's smooth human throat in my massive maw. I could quickly kill him at this moment, crush his throat like a grape. His fingertips begin to run through my coarse fur. He's calm, too calm; he trusts me, but right now, I don't trust me. I'm hurt and angry. Quickly, I release my grip on him and scoot back to see what he does next.

"Aurora, please shift back so we can talk," he says. I grumble and shake my head, my tail thrashing wildly against the ground. "Okay, but please listen to me. I didn't know you felt what I was doing; you never hinted that anything was bothering you." His eyes stare at the ground; his guilt and anxiety coming off him in waves.

I almost feel sorry for him. I growl a little bit more and grumble. Deep down, I'm still debating on hunting the whore down. It's not like there are many towns close to here, it should be easy. My wolf is calling for her blood; she believes that Dimitri is hers alone, and no other should touch him. She's too smug, too demanding. I'm mildly concerned she may try something at some point. I snap back to the present. I'm feeling Dimitri's pain now; his heart almost feels like it's breaking. Sensing his emotions, my damn wolf betrays me and forces me back to my human form. Of course, because it's not planned, I fall flat on my ass.

"Son of a bitch!" I stand up and rub my ass. Real fucking graceful. "Listen, Dimitri..." I never call him by his full first name, and the visible wince is evidence enough that I've gotten his attention. "You've done as nature intends. Your instincts and drive can't be silenced because you've been sentenced as my eternal babysitter. I'm sure being forced to be bound to a baby for life really wasn't high on your list of shit to do." I begin to pace, running my hands aggressively through my hair.

"I'm doing my best over here. My wolf still wants to hunt that female, she's jealous and has a sick idea that you and your bear belong to us." I scoff and scrunch my nose as I turn and swipe at a tree. Just before impact, my talons extend and cut through the tree like a hot knife through butter. I get ready to swipe at another tree, but a firm hand wraps around my wrist and stops me.

"I'm sorry I hurt you, my bear is furious at me. He forced the shift and dragged me out here, knowing that this is your favorite hunting ground." He releases my wrist and starts wringing his hands together. "I'm not trapped as your babysitter. It was, and is, a great honor to protect you. Now, you quite honestly don't need my protection. I've half been waiting for you to tell me to move on, that you've outgrown wanting me around." His eyes are sincere, and yet there's fear behind them. He's afraid I'll do away with him.

"I haven't outgrown wanting you around, D. It's my damn wolf, she's got it in her thick skull that you and your bear are hers." I look down and away after admitting that. "I don't know what to think or do anymore. I should be ascending soon. I feel the change coming. My wolf is anxious and becoming more aggressive. We may need to sedate me, as Elena suggested." I didn't like that idea at all, but what was I to do? Risk hurting others? It wasn't worth it. I didn't give him a chance to speak his mind on the matter. Honestly, I didn't want the answer. I start walking back the way I came. "Come on, D, up the cliff face we go. Time to head home."

My shift comes quicker than usual, bones pop and realign to take on the form of my Lycan. She turns her head to look at Dimitri then motions for him to climb on. Dimitri isn't all that heavy to me in this form. His thick arms wrap around my beast's neck and his legs wrap around my waistline, holding on tightly. When I was absolutely sure he was secure, I leap up and sink my talons into the rock and clay of the cliff face and start my climb. The bear is afraid of heights, so part of me revels in the fact that he's worried. The climb that would typically be over swiftly, stretches out because I want to enjoy his suffering. When we reach the top, I give him a few moments to relax before I launch us off the top of the cliff. His screams fill my ears as we head towards a tree. I use my talons to grip the small tree and slide down, almost like a fireman's pole. Bark and tree-flesh litter the ground when we land. Dimitri quickly slides off my back and starts walking.

I don't bother shifting back to my human form, and he returns to his bear. It was going to be a very long night. My wolf is still tearing me apart mentally. She is going over the logistics of plotting out which possible towns Dimitri could have gone to. Every time he left, it was long after I had fallen asleep, which gives the woman an advantage at the moment. I know my wolf; she'll figure it out. I just hope I'm aware enough to stop her.