14. Irving

14

IRVING

T here was something different about me with I was with Sylvan. Certainly, I could be with anyone and get off easily enough, but the time I spent with him was unlike sex with anyone else. I was free when I was with him. He made me giddy and aroused and hungry for his touch all at once. I craved more of him than I could get in one night or afternoon. Even now, with his hands all over me, the desire was almost as strong as it had been over the past week, and I dreaded returning home all alone and not knowing when I would get a chance to be with him again.

Our breaths came fast and erratic. Even in the cold, my face was hot and sweat formed on my brow. If I had any sense left in me, I wouldn't let either of us climax out here with nothing to clean ourselves up with. But sense was a thing of the past.

Sylvan gasped, his next breath light and clipped, as he came. His grip tightened around me and I couldn't hold back any longer, shutting my eyes so tightly, I saw stars. We were still in that barely hidden clearing in that little thicket of trees, but I was floating on clouds for all I cared.

I let myself collapse on top of Sylvan, sweaty, breathless, and quickly returning to my senses. "This was a bad idea," I told him.

"In what way?" Sylvan asked.

He ran his hand through my hair and I wished we could stay here forever, wrapped up in each other's embrace. The wind was harsh again, however, and the heat from our bodies was not enough to keep the chill away.

"Look around you," I told him. "We're lying in the middle of the woods naked, and once we get up, we have to go back to the library and everyone's going to know and –"

Sylvan pressed his finger to my lips. "Relax," he said softly. "If all you ever do is worry and pretend you're above being human, you're going to give yourself an early grave."

I listened, albeit begrudgingly. We lay under the canopy of the trees as long as we could stand the cold before slowly sitting up and making sense of the crumpled pile of fabric underneath us.

"Here, use this to clean up," Sylvan said, offering me a handful of moss.

I stared at the green clump in his hand. "You've got to be joking. I'm not rubbing that on my bare skin."

Sylvan shook his head, retracting his hand. "Suit yourself."

He tossed me my pants, then my shirt, my tie, my underwear, and finally my jacket. I watched him for a few minutes as he got dressed, stood up, and stretched.

"What are you waiting for?" he looked down at me, still sitting on the ground.

"Hand me some moss," I sighed.

Sylvan merely chuckled and scooped more of the plush green foliage up from the ground. I shuddered to think of all the little creatures and microbiomes living amongst the stuff, but I had no choice but to use it.

"You're a strange man, Irving," he said as I stood up.

"What makes you say that?" I brushed the dirt and fir needles off of my legs.

"One minute you're berating me and complaining about bugs and dirt, and the next minute you're fucking me in the middle of the woods. I wish I could make heads or tails of you."

He circled behind me and helped clean the backs of my thighs and my ass. I was tempted to turn around and grab him before he could leave, doing this all over again, but I'd regained some of my common sense again, and I thought better of the impulse.

"Will I see you again?" I asked as we left the clearing together, a little more disheveled than when we ducked behind the trees earlier.

"Do you want to?" Sylvan asked. "Because an hour ago–"

"An hour ago, I couldn't quite remember what it was like being wrapped in your arms. I don't know how we're going to work out our differences, but I'm not giving that up."

Sylvan smiled down at the ground as we walked. "Well, I would like to see your apartment at some point, I must admit. And you can't have me over if we hate each other."

"Oh, I don't think you'll like it much."

"I don't have to like it. It's not my living space. But I would still like to see where you call home."

"Maybe someday, but not yet. The last man I invited into my home ended things pretty badly, and I don't want a repeat of that – ever ."

Sylvan nodded. "My place, then. How about tomorrow?"

"You'll make sure the house is clean, won't you?"

"Of course."

"All right, then. I'll be there after work."

"Can you leave work early?"

"No, certainly not. I only leave work early for emergencies."

"Of course that would be your answer." He shook his head wearily. "After work, then. And don't worry, I'll be ready for you."

I nodded, not bothering to hold back my smile this time. I stood no chance of concentrating on my classes tomorrow with Sylvan occupying my mind.