7. ROSE UNFILTERED

ROSE UNFILTERED

“Y ou’re in so much trouble, Caden,” Tilly told him the moment he walked in the door of their house.

“Don’t hold back, Till,” he teased her then said, “C’mon, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.”

After all though Valerius claimed to be at a level 15 mad, it was still okay. What can Mom and Dad be at? An eight at the highest?

Tilly crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. “No, it’s probably worse , because my punishment is less than yours, and woo boy, mine is bad.”

“How bad?” Caden frowned.

“Uhm, how about I’m to stay in this house forever and I’m not even to be trusted with my phone or computer for the next century?” She glared at him. Her expression clearly said that this wouldn’t have happened if he and Iolaire hadn’t shown up at the park.

“Yikes! That does sound major.” He leaned down and asked conspiratorially, “So a ride on Iolaire’s back wasn’t worth it?”

She brightened immediately. Her eyes shone. “Oh, that was worth almost anything, but that’s not what I was punished for.”

Iolaire tipped its head back and let out a stream of happy snow in his chest.

“Iolaire is in agreement that it was wonderful, and it wants to be your steed again,” Caden assured her.

Tilly clapped her hands together in glee and let out a whispered squeal. “Definitely! Tobey and Maccauley are definitely trying to text me about when we can do it again. I would know for sure when that would be if I had a phone! I’ve got to work at Wally’s more so I can have a secret second phone like you do.”

“The encrypted phone is so I can talk to Valerius and the other people at the castle without anyone tracing it back to me,” he reminded her.

He had left that phone, thankfully, tucked into his clothes at the pond. He wondered if Valerius went through endless amounts of clothes and phones and wallets—did the Black Dragon King even have a wallet?—when he had to shift in a hurry.

“Do you think that Valerius will give me an encrypted phone?” She looked so hopeful and clasped her hands together as if in prayer. “I mean, you never know when he might need me in order to get a hold of you!”

“I’ll ask.”

Caden bit down on his inner cheek to suppress a smile. He could almost imagine the disbelieving look on Valerius’ face about having the speed dial for a thirteen-year-old girl. But as he thought about it more, giving Tilly an encrypted phone might be a good idea just in case he was in a bad spot and couldn’t call himself. So he actually would ask.

“Thank you!” Tilly jumped up and down.

“So if it wasn’t the flying on Iolaire that got you in trouble, I’m guessing it was egging on the Humans First pitchfork wielding mob?” he guessed with a sympathetic smile.

She nodded and sighed. “I was perfectly safe! You and Iolaire were right there!”

“That’s true. But when Mom and Dad are scared, they aren’t exactly reasonable,” he agreed with her.

“I know! They?—”

Tilly didn’t get to say more as suddenly both of their parents appeared out of nowhere. Tilly’s mouth shut with an audible click. Their mother gestured to the stairs, and Tilly scurried upstairs without a squeak.

That’s bad. Way bad.

His mother’s eyes were red as if from crying. His father’s face was pale as milk, which was how he looked whether he was angry or afraid.

“Hey, guys, I take it that you saw the news,” he said weakly.

“Kitchen. Now.” His father did not wait to see if Caden would come as he turned on his heel and stalked there.

His mother hesitated a moment. She reached out and touched his cheek. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine . There was never any danger and?—”

But his mother shook her head sadly and she, too, turned and went back to the kitchen. Caden tipped his head back and let out a long sigh. While he had been worried about Valerius’ reaction to his detour to the park, he clearly should have been more worried about his parents’ reaction.

After deep breathing to center himself, Caden followed after them. No matter how old he was or how responsibly he acted, they could still make him feel like a child that was throwing a tantrum, and he couldn’t let that happen with this. It was too important that they understand he had to be out and about as Iolaire. Not just for himself and the Spirit, but for the people that they seemed to matter for.

His father and mother stood at the opposite side of the kitchen island from him. The enticing aroma of his father’s spicy, three-alarm chili filled his nostrils and his stomach growled audibly. He’d devoured everything in the picnic basket they’d brought to the pond, but it wasn’t enough. He was still famished and he adored his father’s chili in any event.

He craned to look past his parents at the bowls of toppings set out on the counter. There were cooked noodles, tons of cheese, sour cream and chopped green onions. Another growl exited his stomach. His father pointedly stepped in front of the Le Creuset ceramic dish.

So that’s how it is! They won’t feed me until they have their say!

Valerius, at least, would have let him eat and yelled at him in between bites. But his parents were playing for keeps. He crossed his arms over his chest and ignored his stomach. Iolaire was making pathetic eyes that if his parents could have seen them might have softened them, but they couldn’t see Iolaire and it wasn’t as if he could shift in the house!

“Do you even need me to tell you how irresponsible you were today?” his father asked.

Immediately, Caden’s back was up. What did his father know about shifting? And what did he expect? For Caden to never show himself except at pre-screened times?

“You evidently feel you need to tell me. So go ahead.” Caden crossed his arms over his chest and thrust his chin out truculently.

“Caden!” His mother sounded scandalized at his petulant tone.

Don’t act like a child. Keep it together.

Caden gritted his teeth together. “I’m sorry, Mom, but I already know what he’s going to say, and he’s wrong!”

“If you can read minds then read mine!” His father snapped.

They were like two bulls facing off. Iolaire was making nervous twitters, not liking this anger between him and his parents. But this had been coming for a while, he realized. His father thought he knew better about what being a Shifter was, let alone what being a Dragon Shifter was.

“You think I shouldn’t have gone to the park where Tilly and her friends were, because my very appearance there put her in danger! I should have arranged a private time with her. Right?” Caden ground out.

“That’s part of it,” his father answered tightly.

His father was too good a lawyer to concede that was all of it. He’d think up another argument in moments. His mother tried to soften his father’s anger, but both of them were raring for a fight it seemed.

“Except that’s crazy!” The frustration just burst out of Caden. He was yelling, and his parents didn’t deserve all of this, but they were there and criticizing him. “Can I never go to a park? Can I never interact with people out in the open? Can I never be like every other Shifter? Or every other Dragon Shifter?”

“You’re not like the others,” his mother breathed.

“Yes, I am! Those Humans First people couldn’t have even scratched me.” He shook his head with disgust. “And if I live my life in fear of them then they’ve won!”

“Your sister and her friends could have gotten injured,” his father pointed out.

“Unlikely! I can protect her. Iolaire can protect her and other people too! And I can’t meet Tilly secretly if I want to continue to be incognito!” He thumped his chest. “Don’t you get it that I have to live? That Iolaire has to live? We can’t be cooped up in the house! The people out there need and want Iolaire!”

“Are you done?” His father’s tone was cold. “Whatever you say now, what you did was for selfish reasons, and it wasn’t well thought out. Things are on a knife’s edge right now, Caden. It’s not a normal time where you can just do these things. Humans First tried to bomb our house. Landry is in jail. All the Dragons are coming here to meet you and you’re supposed to be trying to keep your identity a secret! But there you go flying into a public park, nearly starting a riot, and getting it all on the evening news!”

Caden swallowed. There was a lot of truth in this. But he still felt the unfairness of everything so keenly so he struck out, “You’re so willing to put me in charge of my own territory, but not go to the park by myself because I want to go? Oh, wait, that’s because you think that you’ll be running the territory, right?”

His father flinched. “Caden, that’s not at all the same. And I wouldn’t be?—”

“The world is fucked up because humans and Shifters believe that one or the other has to be on top! You want to make sure that I’m on top so that you can be on top, for once, too!” Caden roared.

“That’s not true,” his father whispered.

“Caden, apologize now!” His mother’s eyes were red with more unshed tears.

His father was whiter than before but for different reasons. Regret immediately slammed into Caden, but anger was still like this hot poker prodding him.

“But he’s said it often enough! How many times has he come home from the office and complained about how the best work, and the bigger bonuses always go to the Raven Shifters? How many times has he said he’s a token and that they don’t see his value? I can’t count the times, because there are so many of them!” Caden retorted.

Every word he spoke, even if in some way true, was incredibly cruel. He knew his father was expressing simple—and likely well-earned—frustration. But now Caden was throwing back at him what he likely had considered private.

“I’m trying to make sure that you are protected,” his father’s voice was hoarse. “You trust people so easily. I can already see that you are half in love with Valerius.”

Tears sprang into Caden’s eyes. His face felt hot and tight. He would not cry. He would not howl. Though he wanted to do both all of a sudden.

“You don’t know Valerius at all! You just assume he wouldn’t do what’s in my best interests even though he’s only king because he put himself last , and everyone else first!” Tears were blurring his vision.

“You make him sound very noble, Caden, but remember what he did when he thought another Dragon was in his territory?—”

“That was a mistake! He would never hurt me now! Never! And he listens to me about what I want. You don’t!” Caden snapped.

“That’s not true.” His father was patting the air between them as if that would calm things. “You might not want a territory now, or even be able to rule it yet, but in the future you very well may.”

“Then I’ll get one then!”

“The longer you allow things to stay at the status quo, the harder it will be to change things later,” his father explained.

“You don’t know that! Valerius would have my back if I wanted my own territory. You see what you want and what you think is best. You’ve never asked me what I want!” The tears spilled over and they felt like they should sizzle from the heat on his cheeks. “But when I act on what I want, you say it’s selfish! It’s bad! Well, bringing joy to people isn’t bad! It isn’t selfish!”

“No, of course, not, honey. It’s just… now isn’t the best time for you to be out in the open like that,” his mother soothed.

“Now is the best time! What I did to those Humans First guys did more to set back that group than all of the damned proclamations that have been issued against them!” Caden felt his throat tightening, making it harder to speak, but he pushed on. “Because it showed what they are: racist assholes! And Tilly and her friends by speaking out showed people that they don’t have to be afraid of them either! They took away more power from Humans First than anyone! But, go ahead, ground her! Tell her that speaking out against those who are cruel and awful is something to be punished for. Go ahead! Make her hide the things she wants from you!”

Iolaire hooted sadly and softly. It was that sound alone that had Caden seeing his parents through the rain of angry tears. They both were pale and shell shocked. He’d never spoken to them like this before. It was awful, but it also felt right on some level. Maybe the things he had to say were right. But doing it this way likely hadn’t been. He was certain it wasn’t. He had hurt them. He wasn’t even sure they had heard what he said other than the ugly anger in his voice. He shook himself.

“I have to… I just have to go…”

Caden turned and fled from the house. He heard them calling his name, but he didn’t stop. He slammed out of the front door and was halfway down the street before he realized that he had no idea where he was going. Except he did know. He wanted to go to High Reach. But he couldn’t . Maybe it was good that the other Dragon Shifters were there, because he had a feeling that sobbing to Valerius about how mean and unfair his parents were probably wouldn’t have elicited much sympathy. In fact, Valerius might have seen it as proof of just how young he was. Too young to have a relationship with.

“Caden? Caden, is that you?” Rose’s voice came from in front of him.

He lifted his head and focused in on the Swarm Shifter who was standing just a dozen feet ahead of him under a street light. She was wearing one of her yellow and black bee dresses.

“Rose! Hey, I’m so glad to see you.” He tried to surreptitiously swipe the tears away, but his voice was a watery mess and his nose was full of snot so she knew he’d been crying.

She was suddenly right there, touching his left elbow, her face a mask of concern. “What’s wrong, Caden? What happened?”

He realized then that he should have contacted her and Wally the moment he’d gotten to the pond to tell them he was safe. They would have been worried about him. Maybe that’s why she was walking to his house. Or maybe she had plans with his mom for that night.

“Do you have plans with Mom?” he asked her.

She shook her head, a little sheepishly. She was carrying a wrapped pie dish, he realized at the last moment. “No, I just thought I’d stop by after all the craziness you experienced tonight. And I brought cherry pie. Don’t worry! I didn’t make it. My neighbor did to thank me for taking care of her garden.”

Caden sniffed, smelling sweet, tart cherries and the buttery baked aroma of the crust. His stomach growled audibly.

“C’mon, let’s go back to your house and eat it there,” she suggested with a smile.

“Can’t. You can go, but I… I can’t…” He couldn’t get any more words out.

She grasped his forearms as he had brought his hands to scrub the tears away. “Did they… no, they wouldn’t kick you out. So something’s happened. You need to talk and eat pie. C’mon, I’ll take you to one of my favorite spots.”

He was simply able to nod miserably as words were beyond him completely now. She led him expertly back through the night-shrouded streets of the Mid. They entered one of the semi-secret passages nearby where he’d parked the car he and Valerius had taken to the pond. He found himself looking for it. Longing for what seemed like an age ago now. For a time when he hadn’t said such ugly things to people he loved.

They threaded their way through the back pathways of Reach, until they exited a wooden door that led out onto a little balcony overlooking the drop. There was a bench flanked by two flowering boxes of flowers. Their sweet scent perfumed the air. She sat down and placed the pie beside her, gesturing to Caden to sit on the pie’s other side. She then pulled off the tinfoil cover and revealed the sugar-laced lattice top.

“Dig in,” she said, her mouth parting slightly with desire for the pie, as she simply pulled out a hunk of it with her right hand. No utensils required.

Gooey filling and a dusting of sugar ran down her fingers, but she just bit into the main piece, making groans of delight. Even though he normally couldn’t eat when he was upset, he couldn’t resist this pie, not when it had Rose making those grunts of satisfaction. Besides, if he waited, she might eat it all! So he dug in too.

He soon was joining her in the wordless sounds of appreciation. The filling was just the right amount of sweet and tart to cut the fat from the crust that must have been mostly butter and sugar. The coarse sugar crystals that were sprinkled on top of the pie added a wonderful crunch to the pie’s soft interior and moist crust.

They didn’t talk until half the pie was eaten. Then as they licked their fingers clean of sugar and butter and cherries, he told her everything. Rose was a good listener, he realized. Probably one of the best. She asked a question here or there, but only to draw him out more or clarify a point. But other than that, she didn’t speak until he was done. He let out an exhausted sigh when he brought her up to the point of meeting her in the street.

“So… I’m pretty much a shit person, right?” He tucked his head down.

“No, but you were pretty mean to your folks when you knew they were just scared for you, which for you, fluffy bunny,” she poked his stomach, which had him letting out a squeak and telling her to cut it out, “is pretty intense.”

He rested his head in his hands. “I don’t know. It just all came out. I know it’s not fair. But it’s…”

“Not altogether untrue? Yeah, that’s why you regret it so much. The truth hurts the most. To be fair, I don’t believe your father was consciously thinking that he was finally going to get what he feels he’s owed by his son being the next Dragon Shifter.”

He smiled at her dry tone. “That’s probably an understatement.”

“They were scared. You were frustrated. After everything that’s happened, the fact that you didn’t snap worse than this before is amazing in my view.” She looked down mournfully at the pie, but then shook herself and covered it with the foil again. “We’ll get totally sick if we eat more now. Besides, we’ll get to think about having it later, which is a pleasure in itself.”

He smiled. “I’m so glad I met you, Rose. I feel like we’ve known one another forever.”

She smiled and pinked, responding, “Yeah, it’s so weird. I remember having a few friends like this before the joining where I just… clicked .” She snapped her sticky fingers. “Eweh.” She wiped them on her dress. “But I have to admit that I’d given up on having a friend like that. Until you.”

They both smiled shyly and bumped shoulders.

“You’re the only one who understands,” Caden said as he leaned back against the cold stone of Reach’s outer wall.

She let out a laugh. “I understand what it means to be one of the most powerful people in the world? Uhm, no. Definitely not.”

“I’m not?—”

“Yes, Caden, you are . You’re one of nine beings that has the ability to destroy all of us.” She sighed. “I know from how you told me about it that you felt arrogant for saying how important Iolaire was to everyone. But that’s not being arrogant. That was true .” She crossed her legs at the ankles as she, too, leaned back against the cold stone. “When I was down in the Below, getting the pie?—”

“We have to do something more for your neighbor to get more pie,” he begged.

She grinned. “She has plenty of weeding to do.”

“I’m there!”

“Then we shall be inundated with pie!”

“Sounds perfect to me.”

She shook her head. “As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted about pie?—”

“There is nothing rude about pie,” he scoffed.

“Well, you may have a point there. But anyways . When I was down in the Below, people were all buzzing about Iolaire,” she said with a faint smile. “There was hope , and we don’t get a lot of that down there.”

Caden blinked. “Should—should Iolaire go there? Go back there? After what we did? The hurt we caused?”

He couldn’t quite believe that the people in the Below would look at him and Iolaire with anything other than rage after the deaths that their coming there had caused.

“People know that was an accident. And they blame Valerius, if they blame anyone,” she assured him. “So if you… you wanted to go to the Below… I don’t see why not. Especially with Marban making sure that things are all kept in order.”

“Marban.” Caden’s lips couldn’t help but flatten.

“He’s not all that bad. You should have seen him and Wally today in the shop. They were like a couple of old hens clucking at one another the entire time!” Rose laughed so hard that she was gulping for air. He thumped her back.

“It was that funny?”

She wiped her eyes. “Only because I know Marban, and I’ve never seen him so… real .”

“Real?”

“He was having a good time. Wally was able to call him on his shit and he didn’t get offended by it. Wally, evidently, has that right,” she explained. “He seemed… I don’t know. So different.”

“He’s complicated.”

“He is.”

They sat in companionable silence for long moments. Caden felt like he’d been scrapped clean of all the toxic anger. It was a relief. And Rose made him feel himself again. She was such a good friend.

And what about your other good friend? Landry? She’s in jail .

Caden felt his stomach tightening. He had to go see her if he could. He knew that people did stupid things. Hadn’t he just proved that tonight? He had to make sure she knew that he still loved her and would do whatever he could to help her.

“I think… I think Iolaire should go to the Below, and we should have the press find out about it,” Caden said suddenly. “And then we should have a plan to show people everywhere that those in the Below are just like them, and should be treated just like them.”

“That’s a pretty tall order.” But though her words were slightly negative, her tone wasn’t and her expression was thoughtful. She turned towards him. “What’s with the ‘we’ business? Are you going all royal we on me and will no longer speak in the singular?”

He snorted. “Truthfully, since it is me and Iolaire together, it is we . But I was thinking of we as in you and me figuring this out.”

“Ah,” she said simply and nothing more, but he could tell from her expression that she was both gratified and a little nervous.

He didn’t blame her for the latter. He was way nervous. He had no idea what he was doing. Or more like, he only had the slightest idea that was full of earnest hope.

“I should go home and apologize to my parents,” he finally said. “Come with me? Tilly’s grounded so she’d love to have you sleepover. We can walk together to Wally’s tomorrow for work.”

She blinked, still clearly stunned at being welcome in his home. “Uhm, yeah, sure, that sounds good to me.”

“Great.”

He got up and offered her a hand. She took it. They were both still sticky. He grabbed the pie and it wasn’t because he was fearful that she would eat it all on the way back. Well, mostly not because of that.

“Caden, when you apologize to your folks,” she paused and bit her lip.

“It’s okay. I want to hear your advice. Unfiltered Rose.”

She waved a hand through the air even as she smiled before becoming very serious, “Be certain about what you’re sorry about. Don’t apologize for what you really think. Apologize for the way you said it, but not what you said. Not if you believe it. Because it’ll just bubble up and explode again. You and your folks can be honest with one another and still love one another.”

He nodded. “Told you. Unfiltered Rose is the best Rose.”

She tossed back her head and laughed. “Oh, I have far better things to show you. Just you wait!"