Chapter Seven

My entire body is humming with anticipation.

I'm so aware of every single step Clíodhna takes, walking round the cross, the air around me moving as she brushes past.

When she loosed that cry, I thought I might weep. Tears brimming, unshed. Now I feel like I might cry if she doesn't touch me.

I remember what she said, how she wanted me to beg, but at this point I'm so desperate for her touch that I don't know if I can use words anymore.

I feel untethered, floating, even as I'm cuffed to this cross. And I want it to change, I need it to change. Stillness for too long sets my ADHD brain on edge, sets me on edge, and that rarely has good results.

Eventually, finally, I utter a single word. "Please." I imbue it with everything I've ever wanted, but had denied. Everything that I thought I'd never get to have, never get to experience. I don't need to beg her over and over, because it's all encapsulated in this single word. "Please."

The first strike, when it comes, startles me.

I'm not sure what I expected, exactly, but it wasn't this.

The thud of the tails as they hit my arse reverberate through me, setting my body humming. Awake and ready for more, desperate for me.

She goes again, and the sound the strike shocks out of me is guttural, deep. An "uh" that wouldn't be out of place on adult film set.

I've never heard myself sound like that before.

My eyes are closed again, but she leans forward and whispers in my ear. I love it when she does this; it's like her words have a direct line to my clit, and she speaks, I throb. "Eyes open, kitten. Look at how they all admire you."

When I open them this time, my sight has adjusted to the darkness of the club. The glowing eyes seem less eerie now, less like they've appeared out of nowhere from the dark. I can see the people they belong to, all languid, watching lazily, as I take Clíodhna's strikes.

They're all fae, I realise in a rush. No mortals would look at me like this. I think back to Tam, and wonder if he is fae too, but no. I'm not sure how, but I'm very certain that he is mortal. I cannot imagine him here, in this scene, watching on. He would rather be where I am.

"Are your eyes open?"

"Yes, my queen."

One woman… fae… whatever, leans forward, as if to watch my reactions more closely.

It's not the fact that I'm being watched that's heightening this tension. No, I don't think it's that at all. It's that I'm taking it for Clíodhna, that all of this feels like it's in celebration of her.

I'm making her look good, look great, and somehow that's what's getting me wettest.

That, and the next strike she delivers.

It's sharper, harder, heavier, and the "ooph" it pushes from my lungs is heartfelt.

"Green?" she asks.

I laugh, and throw over my shoulder. "I'm sorry, have you started yet?"

The entire room tenses, I can feel it, and I can feel something else too—a hunger. I have done something that has changed the mood and both they and I are waiting to see what the consequences shall be.

Clíodhna's laugh is low, and she drapes the flogger over my back and lets the tresses run down my spine. It feels like a caress. I know what's coming won't feel the same.

"Oh kitten," she says. "You're right. I hadn't started. I was going to warm you up first, but apparently my kitten doesn't like warm ups."

She leans forward and all I can feel is the material of her suit against my back, her hips, her crotch, thrust up close to mine. Even through the material, I can feel her heat.

She bites my ear. Hard.

It hurts.

This. This is what I crave. I let my head fall to the side, and she tugs at my earlobe, making me wince. "You want more, kitten? I'll give you more."

When she steps back this time, I feel the absence of her, the coolness of air against my skin, and all I can do is wait. Wait for what she's going to gift me.

The flogger comes flying through the air so vigorously I hear it before I feel it. The sharp ‘crack' as it hits me, and I sense the room react. Leaning forward, watching everything that I have to give.

My head is spinning. This is… This is…

Yes.

This is what I needed. I laugh then, shocking myself and her with the sound.

"Is this funny, kitten?" Another strike, and I laugh harder, joy rippling out of me, infecting everyone with my delight.

"No," I gasp out. "It's not funny, my queen, it's everything."

I hear the audience gasp then, and murmur their approval at my response, and I can almost hear Clíodhna's smile in her answer.

"Good," she says. And then that's the last thing that she says for a while. The strikes fall thick and fast, and I lose myself in the sensations.

At some point I don't feel them anymore, or at least, not in the way I first did. It's as if I'm floating above my body, watching all of this take place. Swimming in a sea of sensations, that never threatens to quite drown me.

This is everything.

Sheis everything.