Chapter 20

20

CHARLOTTE

I turn on some music and get moving. Pushing my body, working my muscles to the point of near exhaustion, has my blood pumping and my mood improving. This is what I want to be doing, not parading around in a series of expensive dresses, making small talk with people I can't stand.

Being a princess would be awful, I repeat in my head every time my wolf throws up images of Killian and I laughing together, lounging in bed, kids climbing all over us.

She's really pulling out the big guns to convince myself it wouldn't be all bad to be mated to him. I want all of that, but in a small house in the country, not a big opulent palace with people watching our every move. Judging us, like my mother and my grandmother do with every new person who mates into their elite little circle.

It's a moot point though, because I'm not what he wants. Admitting that stings more than I care to admit, so I shove that hurt down and replace it with irritation. He thinks he can tempt me into his room and do what? Fuck me and kick me out? The cheek of him. I know the connection between us is hard to resist, but he needs to try harder.

I was so close to giving in, but then, where would we be?

Lying in his bed, happy and well-fucked , my wolf unhelpfully suggests.

Closing my eyes, I rest on the bench I've been using to do some light bench presses, and force the images of a naked Killian, all dark muscles and soulful grey eyes, over me in bed, making sure my every need is met, from my mind.

"Please, just leave me alone," I whisper, begging my wolf to stop tormenting me.

"I can't," Killian's tone is apologetic, but firm.

Startled, my eyes fling open, and I sit up on my elbows, stunned he'd say such a thing in front of his guard.

"I'll clear out and let you have some privacy," I say as I sit up, ready to leave and let him have the gym to himself. "Ryker can spot you, if you need help."

But then it hits me. I can't scent Ryker. He's not waiting outside, either.

Killian's given him the slip.

As Killian prowls forward and straddles the bench, our knees touching, my heart hammers in my chest.

We're all alone.

"I couldn't sleep. I can't stop thinking about you." His Irish accent is thicker when it's just the two of us, like he relaxes and drops the hardened alpha routine he puts on for the others. "Every time I close my eyes, all I see is your face."

Reaching out, he touches me, cupping my cheek tenderly, before slipping some loose strands of hair back behind my ears.

I'm afraid to move, to breathe, lest I give away exactly where my own thoughts were right before he came in.

"Ryker will be looking for you."

It's not the right response, but my brain is scrambling, afraid to give in to this when I know we're both just going to end up hurt.

"He won't notice I'm gone for a while."

I don't question how. It doesn't seem important right now, but I mentally file away that I need to know how he got away so easily later. Because if he can get out, someone else can get in.

"Do you think about me, Charlotte?" Killian slides a little closer, his knees pushing my thighs wider apart, bringing our hips closer. "Do you dream about what it would be like to enjoy your mate? To get to know each other, know what makes the other person tick?"

With him staring down at me so intensely, nerves flood my body. I don't trust myself or my wolf, to do the sensible thing and protect my heart. The pull to him is so strong. I rest my hands, fingers splaying on the cool, black vinyl of the bench, and stare, transfixed, as he inches his hands closer until our fingers are slotted together like a human jigsaw puzzle.

We fit so well together. His hands are big and strong, while my dainty-looking fingers seem tiny beside them.

"I'm sorry to hear about your mother. And your father," I blurt out, once again, trying to steer this conversation back into safer territory.

He nods and gives me a grateful smile. "Thanks. It's been rough." There are dark shadows under his eyes, and I wonder when the last time he had a proper sleep was.

I want to pull him into a big hug. I want to lead him back to bed and curl up beside him, knowing that our wolves will rest together. Instead, I offer to do what I can to help.

"I might be able to do something about that." Biting my lip, I doubt the intelligence of what I'm about to do. "Turn around."

Looking surprised but curious, Killian swings one leg over the bench and turns with his broad back to me. I shuffle forward until I'm right behind him, the heat from the back of his thighs touching mine.

Swallowing hard to keep my horny wolf in check, I reach up and rest my hands on his shoulders. Pressing my fingers deep into the knotted muscles there, I start to massage his back.

"You're carrying all your stress in your shoulders. This might help."

His answering moan of pleasure makes me smile, and when he relaxes, allowing me to dig in even deeper, joy swells up inside me. It's nice to be able to help him. Touching him is pretty great, too.

"Tell me you don't do this for everyone on your team. Even if it's not true." He groans, resting his hands behind his hips, between us on the bench, as he leans back toward me, lowering his big shoulders so I can reach more easily.

"I don't."

He hums, content, and I grin, continuing to tease out the spasming muscles in his shoulders and neck. I'm concentrating so hard that I squeal in surprise when he grabs my thighs suddenly and yanks me forward, so my pelvis is flush to his ass.

"Better?"

Too flustered to speak, I nod, and when Killian glances over his shoulder to see what I'm doing, he chuckles at my wide-eyed expression. Instead of releasing my thighs, he holds them gently, but still making sure I don't try to move away again.

"Thank you," he murmurs, sounding drowsy. "If you weren't a hardened warrior, you'd make an amazing masseur."

High praise, indeed.

"But not a princess," I whisper, not even upset when he doesn't correct me. Instead, I say nothing, and just continue to explore every bulging muscle on his body. Feeling brave, I slide my hands up under his T-shirt and start to rub the muscles up along his spine, allowing my hands to venture further and further out toward his sides and hips.

I'm pretty sure he's stopped breathing.

As my fingertips brush over his waist, my wandering hands desperate to feel the dips and ridges of his rock-hard stomach, Killian's hands grip mine, and a sharp exhale passes his lips in a hiss.

"Charlie, we both know what's going to happen if you keep going the way you are." He warns. "I'm hanging on by a thread here."

Pausing, I decide he's right. We both know exactly what way this is headed.

So, I stand and climb off the bench, letting my fingertips trail along his shoulder as I sashay around to come and stand between his knees.

His dark hair is tousled, like he's been running his hands through it.

I bury my fingers into the salt and pepper strands at his temples and push it back from his handsome face.

His hands come up automatically to grip my hips, holding me in front of him possessively, as he stares up into my eyes.

Hunger is all I see there before I close my eyes and breathe in my mate, letting my wolf soak up her fill.

"I was thinking of you right before you came in," I admit. "I was imagining you naked, in my bed. Picturing what it would be like to wake up wrapped around you."

Fingers slide around my hips, and he caresses my ass as he growls, low and husky, before leaning forward to catch the hem of my shirt in his teeth.

"Sounds like heaven."

I nod my agreement as his lips find my stomach, and he presses delicate kisses and nibbles to the soft flesh there.

"We can't have it, because there'd be no going back from that," I admit sadly, and his growl turns from a contented rumble to something darker, more possessive.

My pussy literally weeps as he makes his displeasure known.

"But still… I think we should give our wolves at least… something."

I drop to the ground in front of him, my knees hitting the foam mat, and I stare up at him from under heavy lids. I lick my lips at the sight of his erection straining at the front of his trousers, and reach up slowly, oh, so slowly, for his belt.

I can't believe what I'm about to do. This is so reckless. But I can't stop myself.

I need to taste him. To exert some power over this thing between us.

"Charlotte, this…" Killian gazes down at me, confused. "This is the most beautiful sight I've ever seen, but I don't understand what's happening." He pauses, looking vulnerable. "Are you fucking with me?"

Smiling, I shake my head and rest my hands on his muscular thighs.

"No, I think this is exactly what we both need, Your Majesty. And I am here to serve."