Chapter 10 - Alysa

Alysa stirred, her eyes fluttering open as the events of the previous night crashed over her. The warmth of the shower, Cassius's touch, his sudden departure—it all swirled in her mind, leaving her dizzy and confused.

Was it all a dream?

Her fingers traced her lips where his kiss still lingered. But the slight ache between her thighs and the lingering scent of his soap on her skin told her otherwise. It had been real. All too real.

The first rays of dawn crept through the curtains, casting a soft glow across the room. She had considered going back to the guest room when Cassius fled…

Yes, that was the word. Fled.

But she was already in the room, and the adrenaline from the vampire attack, coupled with the exhaustion after her orgasm, had drained her, so she just climbed into the bed and slept after he fled.

Yes, fled.

Alysa sat up, pushing her tangled chestnut hair out of her face. Her gaze fell on the empty space beside her, a space that should have held Cassius. Her heart clenched.

Why did he leave? Was I not good enough?

It had been a moment—one that should have meant something—but now, in the quiet stillness of dawn, all she felt was a gnawing emptiness.

She shook her head, trying to dispel the insecurities that threatened to overwhelm her. Today was a new day. Cassius would be back soon, and they would talk. They had to. With a deep breath, she swung her legs over the side of the bed, steeling herself for whatever the day might bring.

The house was quiet as Alysa made her way to Aurora's room. The baby was already awake, cooing softly in her crib. A smile tugged at Alysa's lips despite her tumultuous emotions.

At least someone's happy this morning.

"Good morning, little one," she murmured, lifting Aurora into her arms. The baby gurgled, her tiny hands reaching for Alysa's face. "Let's get you changed and fed, shall we?"

As she went through the motions of caring for Aurora, Alysa's mind wandered. Where was Cassius? Why hadn't he come home? The questions gnawed at her, each passing minute amplifying her worry and hurt.

She thought of the vampires, their sinister eyes always watching from the shadows, and fear clawed at her.

What if something happened to him?

The sound of the front door opening jolted Alysa from her thoughts. Her heart leaped, expecting to see Cassius. Instead, Abigail bustled in, her arms laden with groceries.

"Good morning, Miss Alysa," the housekeeper greeted cheerfully. "And how's our little princess today?"

Alysa forced a smile, bouncing Aurora on her hip. "She's doing well, Abigail. Just finished her breakfast."

Abigail's keen eyes studied Alysa's face. "And how are you doing, Dear? You look a bit peaky."

"I'm fine," Alysa lied, her voice a touch too bright. "Just didn't sleep well last night."

Abigail pursed her lips, clearly not buying it, but she didn't press further. "Well, I'll get started on the laundry. You let me know if you need anything."

As the housekeeper bustled off, Alysa sank onto the couch, Aurora nestled against her chest. The hours crawled by, each tick of the clock a reminder of Cassius's absence. She tried to distract herself—with Aurora, with helping Abigail, with anything to keep her mind off the gnawing worry in her gut.

The day stretched on, marked by Abigail's rhythmic comings and goings. Alysa tried to focus on her duties, helping with the laundry and folding the small, delicate clothes that belonged to Aurora.

Abigail chattered away about the trivialities of life—weather, the latest village gossip, the usual noise that filled the day—but Alysa barely heard her. Her mind was elsewhere, wandering through the halls of the house, searching for Cassius. He hadn’t returned, and with each passing hour, her worry deepened.

“Alysa, are you alright, Dear?” Abigail's voice cut through her thoughts, jolting her back to the present.

“Yes, I’m fine,” she replied too quickly. Abigail gave her a knowing look but said nothing more, turning back to her work. Alysa bit her lip, her hands trembling slightly as she folded another blanket.

Why am I so anxious?

The answer was obvious, yet she hated to admit it. She cared more for Cassius than she wanted to acknowledge. The feelings she’d buried for so long were bubbling to the surface, and the uncertainty of their relationship left her off-balance.

If he doesn’t feel the same, why won’t he just tell me?

She couldn’t focus, not with him still out there somewhere. Her heart thudded dully in her chest as the hours ticked by. Aurora sensed her unease, too, fussing more than usual, her tiny fists curling in frustration. By late afternoon, Alysa could barely stand it.

He’s been gone all day.

“Alysa?” Abigail's voice, once again, snapped her from the spiraling thoughts. Alysa blinked and turned to the housekeeper. “I’ll be leaving soon. Is there anything else you need?”

“No, thank you, Mrs. Holloway. That’ll be all,” she managed, her voice tight.

The house grew quieter still after the housekeeper left. The silence stretched like a taut wire, ready to snap at any moment. Alysa paced the living room, glancing at the door every few minutes.

As the sun began to set, casting long shadows across the living room, Alysa couldn't ignore the fear any longer.

What if something happened to him? What if the vampires came back?

She paced the floor, Aurora fussing in her arms, picking up on her anxiety. "Shh, it's okay," she murmured, more to herself than the baby. "He'll be back soon. He has to be."

Where are you, Cassius?

Just as Alysa was contemplating calling Aleksander, the front door swung open. Cassius stepped in, looking haggard and exhausted. Relief flooded through Alysa, quickly followed by a surge of anger.

"Cassius," she breathed, her voice a mixture of relief and accusation. "Where have you been?"

His blue eyes met hers, a storm of emotions swirling in their depths. "Alysa, I—”

But Alysa didn't let him finish. The dam of emotions she'd been holding back all day burst forth. "Do you have any idea how worried I've been? After what happened with the vampire, you just disappeared without a word?"

Cassius flinched, guilt flashing across his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—”

"Didn't mean to what?" Alysa snapped, her voice rising. "Leave me alone after… after what happened between us? Make me think something terrible had happened to you?"

Aurora, startled by the raised voices, began to cry. Alysa instinctively rocked her, trying to soothe the baby even as her own emotions raged.

Cassius took a step forward, his hands raised in a placating gesture. "Alysa, please. Let me explain."

But Alysa wasn't done. The hurt and fear of the past day poured out of her in a torrent of words. "Do you have any idea what it's been like? Waiting here, not knowing if you were safe? If the vampires had gotten you again?"

She saw Cassius flinch at the mention of vampires, but she pressed on. "And what about Aurora? Did you even think about her? What if something had happened to you? What would have happened to her?"

Cassius's face crumpled, the guilt in his eyes deepening. "Of course I thought about Aurora. I would never—”

"Never what?" Alysa challenged, her voice breaking. "Never leave her? Because that's exactly what you did, Cassius. You left us both."

The silence that followed was deafening, broken only by Aurora's whimpers. Cassius looked like he'd been slapped, the weight of Alysa's words hitting him hard.

"I'm sorry," he said softly, his voice thick with emotion. "I never meant to worry you. I just… I needed some time to think."

Alysa's anger deflated slightly, replaced by a deep, aching hurt. "Think about what? About how repulsive I am to you?"

Cassius's eyes widened in shock. "What? No, Alysa, that's not—”

"Then why?" she demanded, her voice barely above a whisper. "Why did you leave like that?"

Cassius ran a hand through his hair, his frustration palpable. "I was in the training hall," he admitted. "I needed to clear my head after… after what happened between us."

Alysa stared at him, her mind racing. She didn’t know whether to believe him or not. The doubt gnawed at her, and she crossed her arms tightly over her chest. “Next time, at least tell me where you’re going. I thought—” She stopped herself, not wanting to admit just how scared she’d been.

I thought I’d lost you.

Alysa's heart clenched. "Was it that awful for you? Was that why you had to run away?"

"No!" Cassius exclaimed, taking a step closer. "God, no, Alysa. It was… it was amazing. That's the problem."

Confusion swirled in Alysa's mind. "I don't understand."

Cassius sighed, his shoulders slumping. "I'm your boss, Alysa. I'm supposed to protect you, not… not take advantage of you when you're vulnerable."

"Take advantage?" Alysa repeated, incredulous. "Cassius, I wanted it. I wanted you."

The raw honesty in her voice made Cassius look away, his jaw clenching. "It doesn't matter. I shouldn't have let it happen. You're my best friend's sister, for God's sake. And I'm… I'm not ready for this. For any of it."

Each word was like a knife to Alysa's heart. She clutched Aurora closer, as if the baby could shield her from the pain of Cassius's rejection.

"So what now?" she asked, hating how small her voice sounded.

Cassius met her gaze, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and resolve. "We go back to how things were before. For Aurora's sake, for everyone’s sake. It's better this way."

Alysa felt something inside her shatter. She wanted to scream, to rage against his words. But instead, she nodded, her face a mask of calm she didn't feel. "If that's what you want."

"Alysa…" Cassius started, reaching out to her.

She stepped back, out of his reach. "I think I need some time alone now. If you don't mind."

Cassius's hand fell to his side, his face a picture of misery. But he nodded, respecting her wish. "Of course. I'll… I'll be in my study if you need anything."

As he walked away, Alysa felt the distance between them grow into a chasm. She looked down at Aurora, who had finally quieted, her tiny hand curled around Alysa's finger.

At least I still have you, little one, she thought, pressing a soft kiss to the baby's forehead.

The next morning dawned grey and overcast, matching Alysa's mood perfectly. Now back in the guest room bed, she'd barely slept, tossing and turning as Cassius's words echoed in her mind.

We go back to how things were before.

But how could they? How could she pretend that nothing had changed when everything had?

Alysa went through the motions of her morning routine, feeding and changing Aurora and helping Abigail with breakfast. She was so lost in her thoughts that she almost missed the sound of voices coming from Cassius's study.

"…be careful with her feelings, Cassius," Aleksander's voice drifted through the partially open door. "She's not just some random woman. She's my sister."

Alysa froze, her hand hovering over the doorknob. She knew she shouldn't eavesdrop, but her feet refused to move.

"I know that, Aleks," Cassius replied, sounding weary. "I'm doing my best here."

"Are you?" Aleksander challenged. "Because from where I'm standing, it looks like you're playing with her emotions. How's she adjusting to all of this?"

There was a pause, and Alysa held her breath, waiting for Cassius's response.

"I… I think I may have to call off our fake relationship," Cassius said finally. "I only did it to protect her from the dangers of the deal with Marcus. Now that it's done, we can go back to how we used to be."

Alysa's heart plummeted.

Fake relationship. Of course. How could I have been so stupid?

"Are you sure that's wise?" Aleksander asked. "What if Marcus decides to make another move?"

"We'll have to deal with that another way," Cassius replied. "For now, it's better this way. Cleaner."

Alysa stumbled back from the door, her vision blurring with unshed tears. Cleaner.

Is that all I am to him? A mess to be cleaned up?

Aleksander’s voice came next, quieter but clear. "Alright then, but you need to be careful with this, Cassius."

There was a pause, and then Cassius spoke again, his words cutting deeper than Alysa had expected. "That’s exactly why I can’t keep this going. She deserves more than this…more than I can give her."

She barely registered Abigail's concerned voice as she rushed past, heading for the safety of her room. Once inside, she leaned against the door, sliding down to the floor as the tears finally fell.

It was all fake.

The realization hit her like a physical blow, knocking the air from her lungs. She'd been a fool, reading more into their interactions than was ever there. Cassius had never seen her as anything more than a convenient babysitter.

As the pain threatened to overwhelm her, Alysa felt something harden inside her—a resolve born of hurt and disappointment.

No more.

With shaking hands, she wiped away her tears. She would distance herself emotionally and focus solely on Aurora. That's what she was here for, after all. Not to indulge in foolish fantasies about a man who would never see her as more than his best friend's little sister.

Alysa took a deep breath, steeling herself for what lay ahead. It wouldn't be easy pretending that her heart wasn't breaking every time she looked at Cassius. But she would do it. For Aurora, for her own sanity, she would find a way to survive this.

As she stood, her gaze fell on her reflection in the mirror. The woman staring back at her looked different somehow. Sadder, yes, but also stronger. More determined.

With one last deep breath, she opened the door and stepped out. The hallway stretched before her, leading back to the living room where Cassius and Aleksander's voices still drifted from the study, back to a life where she would have to pretend that her heart wasn't shattered into a million pieces.

But she would do it. She had to. For Aurora, for herself, she would find a way to move forward, even if every step felt like walking on broken glass.

She paused at Aurora's room, peeking in to check on the sleeping baby. The sight of the innocent child, oblivious to the emotional turmoil surrounding her, brought a lump to Alysa's throat.

I'll do it for you, little one.