Chapter 28

Sophia Hope

Elsa rushes toward me, but I shrink away from her, shaking my head desperately. "D-Don't! Something is happening to me. Stay back!"

My wolf is on the surface. I can feel it. Normally, there's intelligence in the beast within me, but right now, all I feel is mindless rage. I don't want to hurt Elsa.

But she doesn't listen to me. She's holding a basket in her hands; she sets it down as she covers the distance between us. "It's going to be alright. Tell me what's going on."

Her voice is sharp and authoritative, and I stare at her, trying to think past the pain that is racking me. She grips my wrist and looks down at my arm. Her expression twists, and I pull my hand back, cradling it against my chest.

"Go away! Please, Elsa! My wolf is going crazy!"

Her head jerks up at my words. "Your wolf? You can feel your wolf?"

My back arches as another spasm of pain washes over me. "I—I've been able to feel it for a long time now."

My voice is a breathless sob. Somebody make it stop!

She grabs my shoulders, looking furious. "Why didn't you tell anybody?"

"Is this really the time to lecture me?" I scream at her, my face covered in sweat.

She purses her lips, but she releases her grip on me, her voice urgent. "You're fighting it too much."

"Fighting what?" I gasp, my claws digging into my arm.

She seems frustrated. When she speaks this time, I notice a strange buzzing in my ear. Something is preventing me from hearing her words.

"Sophia?" Elsa has a perplexed look on her face now. My vision is blurring; her hazy form turns her head as if looking at someone.

Another person appears in my fuzzy line of sight.

Alex!

What is that expression on his face?

I can't stop my eyes from closing as I finally pass out from the pain.

*** **

My whole body is tingling when I come to. I've felt this sensation twice before in my life. Once when I was at the orphanage and I killed those boys. And the second time was when I first started fighting for Mathew.

Growing up, my strength was on the same level as that of humans. I never really felt my wolf's presence, and I was always told that I had been born with a dormant wolf, hence the label of latent shifter. But that day when the boys in the orphanage attacked me, I felt a new source of strength inside me, something vicious and indomitable. I chalked it off as adrenaline, as I was fighting to survive. I was sent to this town after that, and when I started fighting for Mathew with this newfound strength, I felt the presence of a beast inside me, an intelligent creature. But even after all these years, I have never come close to shifting forms.

Not that I think this was the transformation taking hold of me. It felt more like my beast trying to get out. But something was holding it in. I could feel something restricting it.

I open my eyes and stare at the green ceiling of Elsa's office. My wolf is quiet now, calm and slumbering.

Did Elsa bring me here from the forest? Did I imagine seeing Alex there?

I move my body hesitantly, not wanting a repeat performance of that pain, but when I sit up, my muscles are relaxed, and I feel completely normal.

The door opens as I'm placing my feet on the ground. Elsa walks in and blinks. "You're awake."

I stretch my arms above my head. "Yeah. I'm sorry for the trouble."

Elsa doesn't say anything, watching me quietly.

Her silence troubles me. "What?"

"You don't remember?" Elsa asks softly.

"Remember what?"

Elsa sits down on the visitor chair and begins speaking. But the moment she does, I grip my head, a loud buzzing in my head drowning out her voice.

I feel her hands on my shoulders, and suddenly, the buzzing is gone. Breathing hard, I stare down at the tiled floor. What the heck was that?

"I see," Elsa murmurs as she helps me straighten up.

"What do you see?" A wave of nausea washes over me, and I reach out to grab the wastebasket a few inches from me. I heave into it, but aside from spit, nothing comes out. I groan, leaning back against the couch. "I'm getting really sick of this."

"Easy there." She pours a glass of water and hands it to me.

I sip it, feeling relief as the cold liquid pushes the nausea back and gets rid of the disgusting taste in my mouth.

"I'm either going crazy," I say heavily, "or I'm inches away from exploding."

"It's neither," Elsa reassures me.

I quickly look at her. "You know what's wrong with me?"

She tilts her head to one side as she answers. "Yes, but there's no point in telling you."

"Why not?"

"Because—"

The strange buzzing sound begins again, but it vanishes almost instantly when Elsa stops talking.

"That's why," she points out darkly.

I feel a stab of confusion. "I don't understand."

She shakes her head. "You're going to have to figure it out. I can't say it out loud to you. And I can't write it down for you, either."

For a couple of seconds, I study her, the gears in my head turning, and when I speak, my words are carefully chosen. "Are you saying that this—" I tap the side of my head— "is related to what you're trying to tell me?"

She nods. "Triggers are in place. They're to protect you, I guess. I can't say more than that or you might end up badly injured. I'm talking a possible brain bleed."

Her words startle me. I really don't want to experience that agony again, so I hold up my hands. "Give me a minute."

Triggers? Is Elsa implying that a witch has messed with my head? Or is it something else?

Unfortunately, I have a feeling that if I ask her, I'll suffer the debilitating pain again. The very idea has me shaking my head. I don't want to risk it right now.

"Let's figure this out later." I let out a nervous breath. "Was Alex here?"

"He was able to calm your wolf," Elsa says shortly.

"Is he gone?" I look at the door expectantly.

Elsa watches me. "I sent him away. So, how's it going between the two of you?"

"Same old, same old." I give her a dry smile. "Wrong place, wrong time."

"If I were you," Elsa says, settling her hands in her lap, "I would make it the right time. I told Alex the same thing. Walking away from each other is a huge mistake. No matter what is at risk, he should be with you. For both your sakes."

I shrug. "Do we have to talk about that? I've made my peace with it."

"No, you haven't." Elsa crosses her arms across the chest, looking mildly annoyed. "If you had made your peace with it, Sophia, you would not be gazing toward the door so longingly. You've gone and fallen in love with him."

My mouth flaps open, and I try to form some words of denial, but nothing comes out. "What…That's ridiculous! I would never fall…Stop assuming things! I'm not in love with…That's stupid."

"‘That's stupid'?" Elsa asks dryly. "Really? That's your response? ‘That's stupid'?"

I flush. "Well, it is."

"You're not a little girl anymore, Sophia." Elsa's voice is sharp. "You think that once Alex leaves, you'll be fine? I may not be a shifter, but I know how both your wolves are going to react. If you had stayed away from each other, it might've been less painful. But now that you two have slept together, it's going to be much, much worse. And between Noah and Alex, Alex is the better option."

I've never understood why Elsa is so passionate about my relationship with Alex. "It's complicated, Elsa. He has to put his pack first."

"You are also his pack," Elsa snaps at me. "And if he is sacrificing you for his people's happiness, that's a huge mistake that he's going to come to regret. Right now, Alex is your only way out of this town."

"Do you want me to leave Oakrest?" That's a first, coming from her.

Her expression grows tired. "If I could send you somewhere far away, Sophia, I would. In a heartbeat. This town and its people are not safe for you anymore."

"How so?"

She shakes her head and gets to her feet. "I've already said more than I should."

She is stepping away from me, going toward the door, when I suddenly blurt, "You know, Rita said some strange things to me, as well. Before she died. She called me that night." I don't know why I am telling Elsa this, but the words won't stop spilling out of my mouth. "She asked me to come to her house, and when I got there, she was dead. Nobody knows I found her."

Elsa's back stiffens. "What did she say to you?"

"She kept apologizing. I had asked her a question about the Silver Wolf, and she told me that it was real. She said that she had lied to me before when she said it was just a legend. She wanted to tell me something else in person, but it was too late."

Elsa's voice is heavy with grief. "She was a fool. If she had kept her mouth shut, she would still be alive."

"Rita said everyone in this town has been lying to me." It's my turn to get to my feet. I stare intently at her back. "Have you been lying to me, Elsa?"

She is silent for a moment, and when she speaks, there's a hint of sorrow in her voice. "Everything I have done, Sophia, has been to protect you. Everything."

She walks out the door, leaving me alone in her office, riddled with questions. I know if I go after her, she's not going to tell me anything more.

Once again, I am faced with secrets. I sink back down on the couch, my head spinning.

Elsa knows something.

All these years, I always thought that I knew this town and that I knew these people, but have I been wrong? Did I ever truly know anybody here? I want to go find Elsa and demand to know what it is she's hiding from me, but the incident with Rita has me frightened, and what Elsa just said has me hesitating even more. If Rita hadn't reached out to me, would she still be alive? Is her murder my fault?

I bury my head in my hands, not knowing what to think anymore. I need to get out of Oakrest. I need to get away from these people. I don't want to live here any longer.

*** **

Not wanting to leave the bar, I decide to take an extra afternoon shift. Busying myself with work helps distract me from the terrifying thoughts eating at me. Despite everything that happened earlier, Elsa doesn't show any change in her behavior toward me. I decide to act the same toward her, as well.

I don't see Alex for the rest of the day. During the night shift, I see Nathan and Saul sitting at one of the tables in the back. Their eyes meet mine, and while Saul smiles at me, Nathan just nods and flushes, looking away.

They're watching Eve, I realize. They took my information seriously. Hopefully, now they'll leave me alone. I'll be able to cage fight in peace.

I am about to leave for the night, but as I'm heading out, Elsa stops me.

"Wait!" She grabs her coat. "I'm coming with you."

"Coming where?" I look at the wall clock. "It's one in the morning. Where are you going?"

She buttons up her long, black coat that reaches her ankles. "I'm walking you home."

Her voice is stern, brooking no arguments.

I give her a small, uncertain smile. "I'm not a child—"

"Shut up and start walking."

"Yes, ma'am." I open the door for her. "You're so abusive," I complain jokingly. Once we're outside, I shiver in the cool night air. Zipping up my jacket, I glance at her and notice her eyes darting back and forth. "What's wrong, Elsa?"

"You didn't tell me about the incident last night," she says quietly.

Last night?

My blood instantly curdles as I realize what she's talking about.

"Wyatt's execution," I breathe.

"I heard the news."

I swallow. "I don't know what to tell you."

"Noah is dangerous, Sophia," Elsa stops me in the middle of the road and turns to face me. "I don't understand why you can't see that. Everyone else can. Why are you so blind to what he is? I'm not trying to get in the way of your happiness; I'm just trying to keep you safe—"

I cut her off. "I'm not going to be with him."

She blinks at me. "What?"

"I—" I hesitate, taking a moment to wet my lips. "I don't know how to explain it. At first, it was because I felt like I was going to hold him back, but lately, I just…Like I said, I don't know how to explain it. Whenever I was around him, I only saw his good side. But now, it's like some weird fog has cleared from my head, and he is starting to scare me."

I see the way her expression contorts, and I quickly say, "Don't take me the wrong way. He's not cruel to me at all. In fact, quite the opposite. But I have seen his cruelty toward others. He killed Wyatt because Wyatt insulted me. He told me it was to set an example, but all I could think of was that Wyatt did not have to lose his life. And when Noah killed him, there was no regret on his face. He may as well have been squashing an insect under his shoe. He didn't look like he was killing a person. I can't get that image out of my head."

Elsa raises her hand, stopping me. "What was that about fog clearing from your head?"

I shrug, wondering why she's fixating on that, of all things. "When I was around Noah, I felt good about myself. He made me feel important, precious. I could see nothing wrong in him. But the longer I was away from him, the more I began to feel like I was making a mistake. I would justify it all to myself, but I knew it wasn't right."

When Elsa doesn't comment, I tell her, "I don't know if you know this, but when I was at Rita's cottage before she passed, she gave me an aphrodisiac. Shortly after, Noah and I ran into each other, and we went out for coffee and then to his apartment. That's when the effects hit me. I left his place almost immediately; I couldn't bear to be around him. That's when I knew I couldn't be with him. My wolf doesn't want him. And neither do I."

"Rita gave you the aphrodisiac?" Elsa asks me, disbelief evident in her voice. "How do you know it was her?"

"There was no other place I could've gotten it from." I still feel awful for considering it, but it has to be true. "I didn't have breakfast that day. I'd had a few healing potions that morning and the night before because I'd gotten injured."

"Injured?" Elsa gives me a horrified look. "How?!"

"It's not important," I say quickly, cursing myself for telling her that. "Anyway, I went straight out that morning. I had nothing to eat or drink aside from those potions. My injuries weren't completely healed, and when Rita saw them, she told me to get a healing potion from her bedroom. I took it, and just a couple hours after that, I started feeling the effects."

"You said you went for coffee with Noah?"

I nod. "But I was watching him the whole time. There's no way he could've done anything, and he had no reason to."

Elsa gives me a long look. "The healing potion that Rita gave you, what did it taste like?"

"A little bitter? I still have a few bottles of it. I took them from her drawer when—" I clam up, realizing that I was on the verge of admitting something else.

But nobody can call Elsa a fool. "When you what? What were you up to?"

"Nothing." I give her a tight smile. "But I was the one who picked out the vial. There were two or three more of them in the drawer, and I have them at my place now."

"Why did you take them?" Elsa's gaze is piercing, and I'm starting to feel guilty.

"Because—" I begin before falling silent.

"Because you don't believe that it really was Rita who gave you the aphrodisiac," Elsa finishes my sentence for me. "You were trying to find proof it wasn't her."

I remain silent, but she has hit the nail on the head. Even when I accused Rita, I didn't truly believe it. Why would she do that? The most likely suspect would be Noah, since he was the only other person I saw that morning, but I was watching him. I don't have an answer to this mystery.

Elsa begins walking. "Bring me the vials when we reach your apartment. I know a good herbalist who will be able to figure out what's in them."

I hadn't really thought about how to check the potions' contents before she said that, so I decide to let Elsa help me. The truth is that I would feel much better if I knew what was in those bottles. My last proper conversation with Rita still haunts me. If I accused her wrongly, I don't know how I will live with that knowledge. She was always so kind to me, and in return, I accused her of drugging me. I need to know the truth.

"Okay," I say, digging my fingers into the cloth of my jacket. "I'll give them to you."

"And another thing…" Elsa walks beside me, her voice low. "The story of the Silver Wolf is one that many people don't treat as a legend. They believe it to be true. That's why it would be wise not to mention it to anyone else."

"Rita said the wolf is real."

"And Rita is dead, isn't she?" Elsa meets my gaze.

I come to a halt, staring at her. "Are you saying that she's dead because she knew about the Silver Wolf?"

Elsa gets in my face, her voice laced with warning. "The Silver Wolf is said to be a source of great power. If you start looking for her, others will start looking at you, wondering what you know. And they will go to any lengths to acquire that knowledge. Any lengths, Sophia. That means the people you love or care about will become targets. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

My mouth goes dry. "Yes."

Heart pounding rapidly, I absorb Elsa's warning. I was right. Rita did die because I asked her about the wolf.

I feel numb. It was my fault. I should have been more careful.

As we near my apartment, Elsa sighs, tucking her hands in her coat pockets. "Rita didn't die because of you, Sophia. Whatever she was involved in finally caught up to her. When I tell you to be careful about what you say, it's because you are too na?ve. You don't see the world like I do. And when you meet people, even though your first instinct is to be wary of them, you still trust people easily. You have a soft heart. And I wish to the Goddess that you didn't."

I feel slightly offended. "I don't think I'm na?ve. Life hasn't been easy for me, Elsa. It's taught me a thing or two."

"Yes, it has." She smiles at me softly. "But just having a hard life doesn't mean you can recognize people for what they are. There's a lot you need to learn. You need to be able to distinguish between your well-wishers and those who seek to do you harm. You need to understand that not everything you see is real. Sometimes people only show you what they want you to see. You're still young; experience comes with age. In the meantime, I'll try to shield you as much as I can."

Once we reach my apartment building, Elsa waits for me outside while I retrieve the bottles. After I hand them to her, I linger in the entranceway. "I know I'm a little difficult, Elsa, but thank you for always looking out for me. Your daughter is very lucky to have a mother like you."

I rarely see Elsa get emotional, but my words seem to reach somewhere deep inside her because her eyes soften. I glimpse a heavy sadness in them.

"I hope she thinks so, too."

When she walks away, her shoulders are bowed down as if there is a great burden on them.

I've never seen Tina in person. She hasn't visited her mother in all the years I've been here. Considering how small a town this is, if she had shown up, I would have known. I wonder if mother and daughter simply don't get along.

I head back upstairs and plug in my phone to charge. I'm thinking about having something to eat when I hear a knock on the door.

"Who is it?" I call out, padding barefoot toward the door.

"It's me, Tim."

I quickly open the door and look down at the child standing before me in his pajamas. He seems nervous.

"Tim? What are you doing out here this time of night?" I glance toward his apartment door. "Does your father know you're awake?"

"Dad's not here," Tim replies, clearly upset. "I had a bad dream, and I went to wake him up, but he isn't in bed. He's not home. I checked everywhere."

"What are you saying?" I frown. "He left you alone in your apartment?"

"He does that sometimes. He says he has to meet people. But he promised he wouldn't do it again. I don't—I don't want to sleep there all alone. Can I stay here till he comes back?"

I open the door wider for him. "Of course."

Tim hurries inside, shaking. I can see that he's stressed about being left alone at home; to calm him down, I offer him a cup of hot chocolate.

"Which kind?" He eyes me doubtfully. "Last time, you had that bitter chocolate mix. It wasn't very good."

I grin at him. "I got the good stuff this time. It's sweet, and it makes a really fluffy hot chocolate."

"What's a fluffy hot chocolate?" He giggles. "You're making things up."

Relieved to see him laughing, I put my hands on his shoulders and guide him toward the kitchen. "Well, you'll see when you taste it. Are you hungry? I was going to grab some dinner."

"Make dinner or grab it?" Tim asks, looking up at me. "Can we order pizza?"

"At one thirty in the morning? Aren't they closed?"

"Mr. Jerome's Pizza Spot is always open," Tim informs me brightly. "Dad brings home pizza from that place when he works late at night."

Drew is in construction. What is he doing there so late? "Since when has your dad been working nights?" I ask Tim lightly.

"Since always," Tim replies. He sits down at the kitchen table as I search for the menu for the pizza place. "Even after Mom—"

He goes quiet instantly, his face turning white.

"What's wrong?" I ask urgently.

"Dad doesn't like talking about her." Tim's hands are trembling. He twists his fingers together, trying to hide it. "He gets very angry when I talk about her."

His words surprise me. When I started babysitting Tim, Drew explicitly told me not to bring up his deceased mate, telling me that Tim reacted badly to any mention of her. At the time, I thought he simply wanted to shield his son from memories of the murder. So I made it a point never to mention Katie to Tim. But why would Drew get angry if Tim brought her up?

"You don't have to talk about your mom if you don't want to," I say to the boy, trying to keep my voice even so as not to upset him.

"It's not that I don't want to talk about her." That nervous look forms once again on Tim's face. "But I don't want to get in trouble."

Tim was there when Katie was murdered. He must still be traumatized. Does that sort of trauma ever really go away?

"You won't," I try to reassure him.

"Don't tell Dad I said anything!" Tim suddenly blurts. "I don't want him getting mad at me again."

"Mad at you?"

I always thought that Drew was cautious about discussing Katie because of Tim. But now I'm beginning to wonder if that really is the case. It almost seems as if Drew has deliberately banned the mention of Katie in the house. Why on earth would he do that? Is it because talking about her is painful for him?

"I won't say anything. You don't have to worry," I tell the poor kid.

He looks relieved.

"So, when your dad was working for the pack security team, he used to go out at night?" I ask as I dig the menu for the pizza place out of the junk drawer.

Tim nods. "He still does. Nearly every night. Sometimes he leaves me with you, but sometimes he says I have to be a good boy and stay home. But when I'm alone, I have bad dreams. I asked him not to go, and he said he wouldn't. He promised."

But he broke his word. Is this really the Drew I know? The same one who cherishes his son above everything else?

What is Drew up to? Is he seeing someone? He has always seemed dead set against the idea of dating anybody. I wish I knew what was going on in his mind.

Leaving Tim alone when he knows his son is scared isn't like Drew. Then again, this has been going on for a long time, and I never knew about it.

I find myself recalling Elsa's words.

"Sometimes people only show you what they want you to see."

But why would Drew paint such a picture of himself? He has no reason to lie to me. I don't interfere in his life. The only thing I do is offer him free babysitting.

And he's never had a problem discussing Katie with me. So, why does he not let Tim talk about his mother? Is he hoping his son will forget about Katie as he grows up?

I give Tim a bright smile. "How 'bout that pizza, then? What toppings should we get?"

As the child settles in with a smile, I put all my focus on him. Everything else can wait.

But in the back of my mind is a niggling worry.

What is going on with Drew?