Chapter 3 - Cassandra

The warm arms that hold me provide enough comfort to shed the tears I'd been holding back when Mama's body was rolled into the graveyard in the casket.

“You can do this, Cassie,” the soft, lilting voice of an old friend in the Moon Shine Pack encourages me, hands gripping my shoulders when I step out of her hug.

I nod at Dakota, a Moon Shine she-wolf who'd been my friend growing up. Reuniting with her when I arrived a few days ago, it felt as if nine years did nothing to sever the ties of our past friendship. She's the only one who's offered her unwavering support while I've been handling Mama's funeral, and I've felt less alone because of her.

Smiling with gratitude, I turn toward the small gathering of Moon Shine werewolves huddled around the six-foot-deep hole as my mother's casket is ready for the descent into eternity.

The Moon Shine wolves who attend the funeral are only a handful—the old Luna, Phoebe, and the Beta under Cyrus's command, Jarrod, along with a few patrol wolves who make up the army of soldiers and their mates.

I nod my acknowledgment of their attendance just as Daniel lowers Mama's casket into the ground. Stifling the sob lodged in my throat I watch, teary-eyed, as her body is given to eternal rest.

Crouching with Dakota offering support and holding my hand, I grab a fistful of soil and throw it over the casket. The pain and anguish in my chest are too much to bear, making it almost impossible to get to my feet. So, I remain crouched on the ground, watching the polished casket disappear as the Moon Shine men ladle shovelfuls of soil into the hole.

Dakota squeezes my shoulder, giving silent support as she stands by my side without pressuring me to get to my feet. All I can do is sob quietly, tears streaming down my face as Mama is put to rest.

When another, larger hand is placed on my empty shoulder, I'm forced to look to the side, a frown growing. With pristine polished shoes on the ground beside me, I rake my eyes up over perfectly tailored black slacks, gasping when I realize that the tall man who has suddenly appeared beside me is none other than Cyrus.

My right shoulder curls in from his touch, and I quickly get to my feet, my brows winding with surprise. The feeling of deep grief is replaced with momentary shock.

I didn't think he'd attend my mother's funeral, especially after the brief encounter with him the other day. Setting me off like that in front of the morgue, it didn't come as a surprise when Jarrod, the Beta of Moon Shine, apologized on the Alpha's behalf that he wasn't able to attend.

Citing a meeting he couldn't get out of, I was relieved to know that I wouldn't have to face him again.

So what is he doing here now?

“My condolences on Agatha's passing,” Cyrus whispers as he turns to face me. “She was a kind woman and an esteemed member of the Moon Shine Pack.”

Just what is he playing at? Who does he think he's fooling, acting as if he cares?

His blunt words the other day were a clear indication that he doesn't have an ounce of compassion in his bones. If there was ever any hope that he'd change his ways in nine years, he proved me wrong.

He's much, much worse now that he's the Alpha.

This can only be for the sake of appearances in front of the members of his pack. That's all he'd ever been determined to do—save his face in front of his friends whenever he was near me.

Some things don't change.

“Th-thank you,” I say nonetheless as Cyrus strolls off toward his mother.

I turn to Dakota, her blue eyes wide as she takes my hand.

“I don't wanna be here right now,” I admit, keeping my voice low. “I c-can't.”

Dakota glances over my shoulder and nods.

“Let's go inside,” she gestures toward the pack den.

Nodding, I follow her as she ushers me into the pack den, where we'd just completed prayers for my mother's funeral before she'd been buried. Sighing, I trudge along with heavy feet, feeling less unsettled in the sanctity of Moon Shine's sacred building.

“Take a seat here,” Dakota offers when she leads me to the prepared dinner table. “I'm gonna go check if Nancy is done preparing lunch.”

“I'm not hungry…” I murmur absentmindedly, staring blankly at the doors that remain parted.

What's worse is that Cyrus is there.

Dakota sighs, nudging me onto the bench. “It's customary to eat after a funeral, Cass,” she reminds me. “I know you probably don't have an appe—”

“What is he doing here?”

“Who?”

I turn to my friend, still frowning deeply. “Cy—The Alpha.”

“You just answered your own question, Cass,” Dakota chuckles lightly. “He is the Alpha. Why wouldn't he be here?”

When a group of footsteps resounds on the wooden floorboards of the ancient den, I keep my composure with a deep breath. Only when a dainty hand bejeweled with rings on every finger touches my shoulder do I rise to my feet immediately.

“Luna Phoebe…” I bow my head when her hand gently tilts my chin up. From my periphery, I notice the others taking their seats at the table while the elder woman gently takes my hand.

“Cassandra…” she smiles warmly. “... I am so sorry for your loss.”

I bask in the warmth of her embrace, feeling her motherly love and remorse radiate from her gentle nature. It's the warmth I've lost from my own mother, but it reminds me that not everyone in Moon Shine is terrible.

Luna Phoebe had always been kind to me, especially on those occasions when she'd visited our cottage and shared a cup of tea with my mother.

When the luna pulls away, her kind smile is glittered with a twinkle in her eyes. “You forget, child, that I am no longer the Luna of this pack.”

I know that she's changing the subject for my sake. My time for grieving was over the moment Mama's casket was lowered into the ground.

As werewolves, we're meant to stay aware of the fact that death isn't the end for our souls. Once we've crossed over, we're welcomed into the Moon Goddess's humble abode with open arms that are warmer than any earthly arms.

Still, Phoebe's presence soothes my soul from the physical loss of my mother. I smile back at her and say, “You will always be the Luna of this pack, Luna Phoebe,” I beam.

She glances at her son, the Alpha, as he takes his seat at the head of the long dinner table and sighs. “Only until Cyrus takes a mate.” She turns back to me. “If that will ever happen.”

My attention is drawn to the Alpha then, my head turning off its own accord. As if the luna's wish has somehow unsettled me, a shiver passes through my spine.

Why would I care if he takes a mate or not?

Shrugging it off, Dakota excuses herself to check on Nancy, the elder she-wolf spinster who'd offered to cook lunch for the funeral. I nod, feeling somewhat vulnerable when my friend leaves me just as the Luna leaves my side.

I'm exposed, noticing Cyrus glancing at me from across the room as I take my seat again. His presence, imposing with the hereditary blood of the Alpha running through his veins, is a tough pill to swallow. My throat feels constricted, forcing me to shuffle in my seat in an attempt to get comfortable.

An impossible feat to achieve while he's in the room. Suddenly, everything feels uncomfortable. The white cloak I'd worn for the sake of the funeral procession. My bra. My skin.

I blow out a breath through puckered lips just as Dakota returns with Nancy, and the customary meal is served. The deafening silence is cut with the sound of metal against ceramic when the Alpha piles food onto his plate.

“Cassandra…” Luna Phoebe snaps me out of my daze, pushing a plateful of meat in front of me. “The Alpha has extended his condolences through the first plate.”

“F-first plate?” I look across the table, noticing that there isn't a plate in front of Cyrus. The one he'd been dishing up was for me. In a natural response, I bow my head when his eyes find mine. Respectfully, but also to avoid his penetrating gaze.

Whoa.

I have no idea what just happened, except that the Alpha—who is usually the first to eat in any official gathering—just sent his own plate my way.

Relief washes over me when Dakota joins me on the bench, and I have a distraction from that nagging feeling deep within my being.

Cyrus Rudolph isn't as heartless as he makes himself out to be.

Still, it's not reason enough to feel drawn to him. Those feelings I'd buried when I decided to leave the first time around have no right to resurface just because he extended a small bit of kindness.

It's only because it's my mother's funeral, I remind myself. Again, to save face and prove to his pack that he's an Alpha who cares about his people.

Right?

Right.

I force my meal down my throat, hardly capable of concentrating when intrusive thoughts race through my mind. Sure, he's still as hot as ever, if not more, with all the muscles he'd packed on over the years.

I just can't forget that he's the reason I left in the first place.

“I should head back to the cottage,” I tell Dakota when I'm done eating, patting the corners of my mouth with a napkin.

“Do you want me to walk you there?”

I shake my head, offering her a wistful smile. “I'll be fine. I think I'm gonna get to packing.”

Dakota places a hand over mine. “I hope you're not leaving any time soon.”

“Not until I've sorted out Mama's things,” I explain with a sigh. “There are some things I'd like to give away and others I'll take back with me.”

Dakota purses her lips, eyes growing weary. “How long are you planning on staying?”

I shrug. “A week? Two weeks?” I glance across the table, where Cyrus has his head dipped at Jarrod's ear, whispering something to him. My heart drops as I imagine him making some derogatory remarks about me to the Beta. Just as he did all those years ago, in the library…

“I still can't convince you to stay?” she asks solemnly.

I turn back to her, shaking my head. “I don't belong here, D. I've made a life for myself out there. I have to go back.”

***

I seal the box with duct tape, then label it “Mama's Souvenirs” with a black marker. Getting to my feet, I plant my hands on my hips and take a look around the room.

It'll probably take me less than a week to gather Mama's things, the important stuff already packed in the box in front of me, ready to be shipped out of the country before my own departure.

It comes as a relief since I don't care to be here any longer. Not around Cyrus, anyway. He'd been the detriment of my past, and I needed to get away.

The hooting of owls outside draws my attention to the window, my feet moving of their own accord as I make my way there. Pulling the curtain aside, I stare out at the quiet town and feel a sense of longing wash over me. I look up beyond the canopy of trees that make up the forest and sigh forlornly.

When the navy sky, littered with bright stars and the moon almost full, seems to call out to me, I decide to step outside. The stillness of the night is welcoming, folding me into its crisp coolness and allowing me to enjoy my brief visit without having to face other pack members.

The howling of wolves beyond the mountains signals their hunting session, drawing a smile on my face. I forgot what it felt like being a part of a pack since leaving the States meant that I had to hunt and fend for my wolf alone, ensuring that I stuck to the shadows to protect myself from being found by humans or other creatures that might lurk in foreign territory. Being a werewolf, all on my own, had its own set of challenges.

Being back in Mysthaven has the tips of my fingers and toes tingling with the sudden urge to feel my homeland's ground beneath my wolf paws. This desire grows stronger with every step I take, demanding my attention until I relent to my inner wolf's impulse and shift near the ingress of the woods.

Bones crackle as my limbs distend and fill out to the wolf's ardent size. The cushioned pads beneath my paws taste the ground of home soil and feel ignited by the fiery passion I missed for nine years. I submit my mind to my wolf, allowing her to carry me across the meadow and into the graveyard, where I stand over the fresh heap of Mama's grave.

The quiet, coupled with the moon's radiant glow casting a spotlight over the new grave, allows my wolf to whimper just as tears cloud its sharp eyes. For the first time in almost a week since her passing, my wolf sheds tears and grieves the loss of Mama.

A weight lifts off my shoulders, allowing me to step through the graveyard to my father's resting place. Paying my respects to him and shedding a few tears for his death almost fifteen years later, it's like the breath I take is a new one.

I hadn't realized how much I missed this place, and now that I'm here, I have to run through the woods in my wolf form. Crossing the meadow, I enter the arch of trees as my paws patter the soft soil and I'm taken into a steady jog through the Mysthaven forest.

“Home… ” my inner wolf voice praises mentally, relaxation and calm spreading through my wolf form as I meander through the valley and hop over Turkey Creek. Unlike the bus ride here, my gut isn't filled with knots that bind me to anxiety.

Instead, I feel free, running along until I end up near the cliff where a group of Moon Shine wolves feast on a deer.

“ Mind if I join?” I ask them, connecting to the mind link I haven't had the privilege of being linked to for years. I feel it now, that sense of belonging, the sense of community that outweighs the extent of my prior inhibitions. For the first time in my existence as a wolf, I'm brave enough to approach the male wolves during their meal.

Jarrod, the Beta, pokes his head up, his wolf tongue lapping across his furry lips. “ Of course, Cassandra,” he replies telepathically, nodding his chestnut brown head. “ Come on.”

I step over the log on the ground while the male wolves step aside to give me a spot to eat. There isn't much left on the carcass, so they gradually finish their meal, leaving enough fresh meat for me.

Only Jarrod remains, biting huge chunks from the deer's ribcage. As the senior on duty tonight, the other patrol wolves show him respect as the Beta.

“ How have you been doing, Cassie?” Jarrod asks.

With a mouthful of fresh, dripping meat to satisfy the sudden bout of hunger my wolf feels, I look up and quickly realize that everyone has their eyes on me.

Not in a skeptical, condescending way, but their beady eyes seem to watch me with awe.

It's probably because I'm the only female around. It's not usual for a she-wolf to be out here outside a group of other females.

Being here should be considered breaking the rules, but it doesn't seem to bother these males.

“ I'm fine, Beta Jarrod, I—”

“You can just call me by my first name, Cassie. We've known each other for many years.”

I nod my wolf head. “ Right,” I giggle internally.

“Say, Cassie…” Dante, another male wolf, steps forward. “ Are you planning on staying now that you're back?”

My wolf shrugs. “ I'm not sure.” The mental admission has me wondering why I'm suddenly doubtful of leaving. It can't be their keen interest in me—I'd learned a long time ago not to feed into the attention of males.

Cyrus taught me that by turning out to be a douchebag. Even in the human world, I'd taken male attention with a grain of salt, only using it as a stepping stone in my career as a graphic designer for a large marketing company in Tokyo.

Even while I hustled in the States when I first left Mysthaven, I didn't fall victim to the male species. It's never been worth it. It's only gotten me hurt in the past.

Right now, though, it's my wolf who replies with uncertainty.

What reason would I have to stay when I have nothing to keep me here?

“Well…” Jarrod begins. “ ... If you'd like, there's a full-moon gathering this Sunday night. Don't miss it.”

An invitation to a gathering from the Beta himself?

“Of course,” I say cheerfully. In the past, I'd always tag along to the pack gatherings with Dakota, never receiving a personal invitation from anyone in the pack. Because of the way Cyrus usually treated me in front of them, I was always an outcast.

Somehow, that's changed despite being gone for many years.

Jarrod peels his lips back, his wolf about to smile until he suddenly stops. His wolf ears perk up, and he takes a step back and drops his head.

Out of nowhere, Cyrus emerges from the woods in the silky folds of his honey-golden fur. I glance at Jarrod whose ears now fold over his cheeks bashfully as he retreats.

Cyrus must have said something in a private mind link shared with the males that has them all backing away and dispersing into the shadows.

As he nears, I immediately shift into human form and bow my head. It's a natural reflex, one I'd learned to act on when I first received my wolf on my eighteenth birthday. Cyrus scolded me that night, on the mountains, about how disrespectful it was not to take on my human form in his presence.

It made no sense back then since no such ruling exists in pack law.

Frowning, I have no idea why I just did that. It's not like he'll kick me out—I'm leaving soon, anyway.

I lift my head and tilt my chin defiantly, facing the magnificent creature in front of me. He growls lowly, but it does nothing to faze me.

“What is it? You're gonna ask me to leave?”

Cyrus's radiant emerald eyes narrowed at me, the menacing eyes of his wolf fiery. I raise a brow expectantly, prompting him to shift into his human form.

Good Goddess!

How is he able to be so mystically attractive right now?

Shaking off those heinous thoughts, I stare up into his face, having to crane my neck.

“What are you doing out here?” he asks with a gravelly tone.

“Does it matter?” I quip with a snide smirk.

“What matters is that you're planning on attending the gathering next week, Cassie,” he bites back bitterly.

“So?” I shrug diffidently. “Am I not allowed to attend?”

Cyrus's brows furrow, his jaw clenching so sharply, it's like he's planning on cutting the palpable tension in the air. “Since when do you care about pack gatherings?”

I cross my arms, and my pulse ignited when I notice his ears turning a bright shade of red.

There's something about my willingness to attend that seems to be rubbing him the wrong way, and it gives me a taste of revenge I didn't think was possible before.

“I care now,” I retort with a self-satisfied smirk. “I mean… I am in Mysthaven. I might as well do as the pack does, don't you think?”

Cyrus grunts. “You made it abundantly clear that you couldn't care about this pack when you left,” he grates. “When will you be leaving again?”

Something in the way he glares at me, jaw pulsing with how tight he clenches it, has my desire for revenge fueled to the brim.

I want to see more of his suffering.

“I'm not leaving,” I declare boldly, squaring my shoulders and standing up to him. “I've decided to stay in Mysthaven and live in my parents’ cottage.”

“What?!” he exclaims, echoing my own sentiments as I realize the extent of what I've just said.

I hadn't given it any thought until right now, but somehow, it feels like I'm making the right choice.

If I stay, I'll be a nuisance to the Alpha, and he'll realize how wrong he was in the past.

How wrong he is now to think that he can be rid of me.

I won't make it easy for him.

“What do you mean you're staying? You can't—”

I take a bold step forward, glowering at the Alpha. “Of course I can.”

He mumbles a string of obscure profanities under his breath, but it only lifts my lips into a mischievous smirk.

“What are you gonna do, Alpha?” I sneer. “Kick me out? That won't be a good look for you.”

With a flick of my wrist, I toss my hair over my shoulder as I spin on my heel, shifting into the wolf who's now strengthened with not just her meal but with the ability to stand up to the pack's Alpha.

This is going to be fun, I think as I head back to town, to the cottage that I just impulsively decided would be my home.