38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

T he morning sun was streaming into his room when Jackson opened his eyes. He hadn't thought he would. The dark magic had spread through him so quickly that when he had closed his eyes, he'd been sure it would be for the last time.

He turned his head towards the bundle of heat nestled against him and met her gaze. He felt her relief like the weight had lifted off his shoulders.

But there was nothing to feel relieved about. What happened only proved that she wasn't safe with him.

He could have died.

Layla would have been left alone to deal with all this shit, even with Dylan, Micah and Chase watching over her. The witch had become bolder. Maybe she had just been toying with him because she seemed stronger.

Layla bit her bottom lip as if trying to hold all her emotions in. He could sense each one, and it felt like a judgement. Her feelings made him feel like the biggest failure to walk the earth. An Alpha King who couldn't protect his mate and child.

An alpha who couldn't mark his mate to give her the protection she deserved.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"You can't do that to me again," she whispered.

She started to blink back tears, and that speared his already shattered heart. He'd spent months trying not to get emotionally involved with her, but it was all fruitless. The woman in his arms was his whole world, even if he was only a small part of hers. That was a fact he had to deal with, and quickly so he could do what needed to be done.

"I'll take you out of here," he whispered. "I'll keep you safe."

It was starting to sound like an empty promise.

"I don't want you to keep me safe; I want you to be safe," Layla whispered. "How will you raise our child if..."

She looked away from him, and his heart was speared again. Neither of them would be raising their child.

"How are you feeling?" Layla asked when she had composed herself.

He gladly accepted the change of subject.

"Not as bad as last time, actually. Just a little tired. How long was I out this time?"

Even Cain was just resting. He didn't sense any pain or distress from the beast even though the pain had been unbearable when they had been bitten.

"It's been less than a day."

What?

He pulled the bedding off to look at his leg. It was wrapped up because it had broken, but the bite didn't even register. It felt like that had already healed. He hadn't imagined Brax infecting him; he was sure of that. And he hadn't imagined the strength of the magic. So what the fuck was happening?

He looked back up at Layla. His mate, the red wolf, the enigma. He'd healed last time because of her. And he suspected she was the one who'd healed everyone else. Had she done it again?

"Did we lose anyone?" he asked.

He already knew the answer. All his bonds were intact; none had been forcibly ripped from him like the last time.

"I don't know. It didn't look good when I saw the ones who got injured," Layla said, confirming that she had left the bedroom again.

He hoped Diedre hadn't seen her. His witch had been too preoccupied to investigate the first time, but since it had happened again, Diedre would definitely look into it. She had already made herself ill looking for answers lately.

Layla's mother should have been more forthcoming with what to expect instead of telling him that ‘he'd see for himself'. That was just some bullshit.

Layla rolled onto her back, putting distance he didn't want between them. She looked tired and miserable. A blast of her guilt and pain hit him in the face.

"I want to leave as soon as you're better," Layla whispered again.

The last time the pack had blamed her for the attack, they would probably blame her for this one, too. But she had done nothing wrong. He'd pulled her into all this mess just because he'd wanted a child.

He pulled her back into his arms, taking as much comfort from her as possible because they had finally come to the end of the road.

The moment his leg got better, he was going hunting. He wouldn't sit around like a dick while waiting for the witch or the Circle to make their moves. And once that was done, he was letting go of his mate for good.

"Yes. As soon as I settle everything here and make sure they will be okay, we'll go."

He repositioned her so he could rest his face in the crook of her neck, his lips touching the spot he wanted to mark. Her pulse started to hammer against his lips, teasing him. If Cain hadn't been recuperating, being that close would have been more unbearable.

He would regret opening up to her when she was gone, when he had to spend his last days alone. But he felt too raw not to take it all in one last time. He allowed himself to take in her scent and kiss that spot. He allowed himself to feel what he had been trying to bury or run away from. Layla trembled in his arms, and that would have triggered him if he hadn't been so exhausted. Besides, Layla had been stressed out enough while waiting for him to return—he didn't want to do anything else that would jeopardise the baby.

His hand lowered to the small bump on her stomach and focused on the baby's heartbeat. It was still strong and steady, but he knew that could change at any moment if he didn't take Layla away from the stress.

She had to start living her life without him.

Why did this have to suck so much?

"How did you handle it?" he asked after a while.

"What?"

"The separation. Knowing I was out there fighting. I know it would have been unbearable for you, too."

He had never acknowledged the effect of their bond out loud. But he supposed that was something they would have to discuss before he left her so that she could prepare herself.

"I was... I got through it," Layla said.

"Did you control your emotions? I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't. I tried not to worry that the others would see you if you lost control, but Diedre and Jasmine are trustworthy. They won't say anything if they saw how you reacted while locked in here. It will be okay."

If he hadn't been right against her neck, he would have missed it. The slightest tension. The smallest tick in her jaw.

"I was in control," Layla said.

He pulled back so he could see her face.

What the fuck?

She was lying.

He took a deep breath and took in all the scents around him. Jasmine and Diedre hadn't been in his room in the last twenty-four hours. And Layla? Had she stayed in the house this time, or had she risked her life and their child's?

He lifted his head to look into the emerald eyes. Layla blinked and looked away.

Fate had taken his strength and broken his leg for a reason. He was ready to murder someone.

‘Dylan!'

‘I'm sorry, Alpha.'

Dylan answered quickly as if he had been waiting for him. His Beta knew what he'd done wrong. He felt Dylan's guilt through their bond.

‘Get up here,' he growled.

‘I'm still helping Alpha Brax figure out what happened. We've helped them gather their dead, and they camped in the forest. I can't let them in, just in case.'

Right. Alpha Brax.

He put his anger to the back of his mind as he remembered the look in Brax's eyes and the welts across his back. If the witch managed to do that to such a strong Alpha, could she do the same to him?

He felt more useless than ever.

‘When we've all rested, I'll come and see him.'

Once Cain recovered, he would heal a lot faster. Judging by the pain in his leg as his flesh and bones knit back together, it wouldn't take too long for him to be able to put weight on his feet.

‘Yes, Alpha,' Dylan said, and then he cut the link.

Dylan had bought himself a little time, but he wouldn't let this one slide.

He turned his attention back to Layla. Her eyes widened like a deer caught in headlights, and her mouth opened and closed.

"What did you do?"

"I'll go and get us something to eat. You need to get your strength back quickly," Layla said as she moved out of his arms again.

She couldn't hide her guilt as she left the room without looking back at him.

He wanted to be angry with her but he couldn't. Their bond would have pushed her to disregard her life to try to help him. Her wolf would have taken her over and put her in a dangerous situation.

There was only one thing he could do to sever that bond, something he probably should have done before he had got her pregnant. And though it hurt to think about, it was perhaps the only thing that would make her hurt less in the long run.

He had to reject his mate.