3. Axl

I hear the human female performers by the fire start singing the song, “…the earth, the air, the fire, the water, return, return, return…” and I take it as a sign from the goddesses that this lone blonde haired woman dressed in the goddesses’ green color is the one who can help me get back to the Empire. But she doesn’t speak this area’s language, so I have no choice but to use my stealth teleportation device and take her away. In the darkness, everyone will think that we walked away and they missed it. Humans have poor night vision and they don’t expect people to simply disappear. During my weeks here, I’ve noticed that most humans are easy to fool because they don’t want to believe in aliens or see any technology they can’t understand. In the newspapers, I’ve seen videos of Dulu and Alliance Force ships, but most humans refuse to believe alien life exists. Unfortunately, this is also what makes them easy targets for alien abduction.

I set my transportation device to take the blonde woman and myself far away up into the Harz mountains to the cabin I’ve been staying in. Once we rematerialize, I don’t let go of her, instead I tighten my grip on her arm. No doubt she’s going to try and run. I would if I were her.

When she realizes she’s whole again, she’s understandably confused. She looks up at me and I see fear in her eyes. No doubt it’s because of this devilish red mask. I’m not supposed to reveal myself to humans, but I know by all the signs from the goddesses, I will have to trust this human woman.

I slip off the hellion’s mask to calm her, but it has the opposite effect. She screams and it echoes through the trees. Some animals run, rustling the bushes. She tries to squirm and run away from me.

“I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Are you the Devil?”

“No,” I say in Alliance and then say in the local language, “Nein.” She seems to understand the local language for this basic word.

“What do you want with me?”

“I need your help,” I make my tone soft when I ask her, hoping that she might understand me this time.

“I don’t understand.” She tries to twist out of my grip again. When she can’t she begins screaming for help. “Someone please help me! This man is going to kill me! Help! Someone please!”

“I’m sorry,” I say in the local language and drag her into my cabin. Inside, I restrain her with a few ties around her wrists and ankles while I prepare the medical instruments. She’s yelling so loudly I already feel guilty about this, but it can’t be helped. I have to be able to communicate with her and for that she needs a translator.

Once I’m ready to insert the device, I try to soothe her. “I’m not a doctor. I don’t have any telepathic skills, so it’s best if you stay as still as possible while I do this.”

She, of course, doesn’t understand me and just continues to shout for help and struggle. My only consolation is that at least she’s not crying.

“No one is coming. We are completely isolated here,” I tell her as I take her jaw firmly in one of my hands so I can insert the translation device. It takes a lot of my strength to keep her head stationary. No doubt she’ll have a bruise on her face tomorrow in the shape of my thumb and forefinger if I don’t heal her directly after the procedure.

“Stop! Stop! I’ll do whatever you want! Please don’t hurt me,” she shrieks over and over again.

“You have my word on the goddesses I will not hurt you intentionally. You need to be able to speak to me so that I know the translator is working. It would be very inconvenient if you lost your voice now.”

I begin programming the translator. I’m going to assume that this language she’s shouting in is her native language. I insert the translator above her ear. She makes a little whimper and I automatically say, “Zzzz,” to calm her. Then I continue to hold her stationary while I wait for the device to begin working. It seems like every second lasts as long as a minute. I begin to wonder if I’ve given her brain damage. There’s galactic gossip that human brains aren’t sophisticated enough for translators. I never believed that, but now that this is taking an extraordinarily long time, I begin to doubt myself. Relief spreads through me once the translator says it’s ‘online.’ Then I say as sincerely as I can in Alliance, “I am not going to hurt you.”

“Then let me go!” she roars back.

I’m thrilled she’s not brain damaged. I take my medical palmer and heal her chin and neck so she won’t have bruises. Then I release her from her bindings and back away to give her space. I helplessly watch as she frantically runs her fingers to where I inserted the translation device.

“What did you put in me?” She’s looking for the device like there’s a rogue insect in her hair.

“It’s a translation device. It won’t hurt you.”

She looks at me in complete shock. “Why are you grey? Did you paint yourself for Walpurgisnacht?”

“No. I didn’t paint myself. I’m not the Devil either,” I add as an afterthought. “I’m not from your planet.”

She looks at me in disbelief.

“I’m not. And that’s the thing. I need your help.”

“My help? I’m a foreigner here too.”

“No, I mean I need your help getting off planet Earth. I need to return to my home on the other side of the galaxy.”

She laughs at me. “Is this some kind of joke that the local people play on tourists? Okay, so funny.” She looks around the small rustic cabin. “Where are the cameras? Where’s everyone that’s going to laugh at me for believing this?”

I look around the small cabin too. We are alone. Then I look back at her. “This is no joke.”

She looks around the empty room again and then back at me. The cabin is completely silent except for our breathing. After a few seconds she says, “Okay fine, I’ll play along. I hope I win something afterward for my stellar performance. I was the lead in South Pacific in high school. I have no shame in drama for drama’s sake, even if this is a budget sci-fi production.”

I have no idea what she’s talking about, but it doesn’t matter. I need to get back to the Capital Planet as quickly as possible. “Good. I need you to pretend to be my wife. Once we convince the Alliance Force, who guards Earth, that we are married and they provide me with passage home, then I’ll return you. I will pay you in Earth’s currency for your time and effort.” I take out the suitcase and show her the human currency I preemptively procured to entice a human woman to help me in this endeavor. Judging by the look on her face, this is more than enough money to buy me a temporary human wife.