Chapter 4 Asher Nash

Dirty. Extra Dirty.

I tug at my collar as I give myself a once-over.

Good enough, I guess.

I wouldn’t even go to this stupid thing tonight if my brother wasn’t one of the chairmen of the event, but since he’s not just my brother but also my head coach, I kind of have to go.

Lincoln will be there with his wife, Jolene. My parents will both be there, along with my brother Grayson and his wife, Ava. It’s a family affair, with the exception of my other brother, Spencer, who is in San Diego as he starts his season with a new team.

And so I’m sort of going under protest, which is why I chose threads that would annoy my brothers to no end. It’s honestly what motivates me to make the majority of my fashion choices—that and trying to lighten the mood around me. Ever try to have a serious conversation with someone when you’re wearing a shirt covered in cat faces? Works almost every time.

I kept it more subtle tonight than usual, anyway—at least in terms of animal print. I chose a paisley gold jacket and paired it with a white shirt and sand-colored pants.

My hair is done in my usual rolled-out-of-bed-this-way style, though honestly, I spent a good fifteen minutes making it look this good.

I meet my dad in my kitchen. He sort of fell from grace with some scandals over the last few years, and when he and my mom got divorced, he asked if we should live together. I didn’t have a great reason to say no since it was around the same time I was suspended.

It’s not like my bank account is padded, exactly. I lost an entire year of income during that suspension. I’m not smart and responsible with money like Spencer, and I’m not a natural leader like Lincoln. I’m not the social guy who brings the party with him everywhere he goes like Grayson.

I’m Asher. I’m the youngest and fastest of the four Nash brothers, and I’m the adventurous risk-taker who sometimes makes impulsive decisions but almost always comes out on top.

I hate it when people call me Ash Nash, and I hate it even more when people call me Asher Nasher.

I don’t mind having a roommate, but having a roommate who’s also my dad can get…annoying. He doesn’t care who I bring back, but when I walk a woman out of my bedroom in the morning only for her to run into my dad , things can get awkward.

So I’ve taken to finding alternative places to hook up.

It’s been a while since the last time I hooked up with somebody, though, and I’m getting restless. I guess I’ve always been labeled a player, but I’ve had a front row seat to watch all three of my brothers settle down over the last couple years, and that sort of makes me feel like I’m next.

The problem is, well, I live with my dad.

Not because he’s a cockblock but because of other things.

For one, he instilled in all four of his sons that the game of football comes first above all else. He made the mistake —his words—of knocking Mom up with Lincoln when they were young, and he didn’t like being tied down when he had a game to focus on. Four years later, Grayson came along…so it couldn’t have been all bad. But still, he made it clear that kids make everything harder, and he seemed to blame Lincoln for that. It’s probably why Lincoln waited until he was thirty-six to have his first kid, and that still seems far too soon to me.

And for another thing, after forty years of marriage, my parents got divorced.

They were much younger than my current age of twenty-eight when they first met, so maybe they didn’t have the best decision-making skills. But that didn’t give them the happy ending they were hoping for, and I guess that left their four boys with scars.

It left me with some, anyway.

Maybe it doesn’t affect the others the way it does me. Since I’m the youngest, I was around for more of the stage where things started to fall apart. Lincoln’s nine years older than me, so he was already playing in the NFL by the time I hit puberty.

And I guess watching it fall apart made me see that commitment really isn’t for me.

I think it also made me see that sometimes walking away is easier than dealing with conflict. And that’s not the kind of personality trait that does well when it comes to commitment.

I’m not picking sides, but if I were, I’d choose Mom’s. My dad can be a dick, but mostly we’re a couple of single dudes having a good time. On my dime, usually, but it’s a small sacrifice to make given the fact that he’s my dad. Is he perfect? No. But has he been there for me through some of the most difficult moments of my life? Yes.

I’d been planning to bring a date with me tonight, but when I looked through my contacts, nobody was calling out to me.

I was somewhere around the Js when I stopped looking.

Jackie, Jada, Jayla, Jasmine, Jess, Jocelyn, Josie, and Juliana were all unique and I’m sure lovely women, but to be honest, I can’t recall specifics about a single one of them.

I called Lincoln a few days ago and let him know he could have my plus one ticket back, and I opted to go solo. Maybe I’ll find someone there, maybe not.

I don’t know what he did with it or if he gave it away, but I guess I’ll find out if someone is beside me when we take our seats tonight.

“Ready?” my dad asks. He’s wearing a boring black tuxedo, and he gives me a once-over. “The fuck you wearing?”

“It’s paisley,” I say, glancing down at my jacket. “The invitation said it’s a formal event, so I skipped the animal faces tonight. What’s wrong with this?”

His brows quirk, but he holds up a hand as he raises his brows and sighs as if he can’t figure out where he went wrong with me. “Nothing,” he mutters. “Let’s go.”

I smile as he turns. There’s something really satisfying about annoying my father purely with my choice of clothing.

We’re photographed on the red carpet as we walk into the star-studded event, and I’m interviewed by my sister-in-law, Jolene, after I walk into the hotel where the event is being held.

“Who are you wearing?” she asks, and I tell her. She asks me a few other questions about who I’m hoping to see tonight, and I give the standard answers about my teammates who are like brothers to me when, in truth, they’re not.

Grayson retired, as predicted at the end of last season, so my actual brother isn’t my teammate anymore. I can’t count the head coach as a teammate, and my real teammates don’t really seem to like me all that much, with the exception of a few of the wide receivers I’ve gotten friendly with.

I’m not sure if it’s because I’m the coach’s brother or if it’s because I was suspended for a year, but either way, I often feel like an outcast. And if you can’t be a part of the brotherhood with your own teammates, well, you’re pretty much fucked.

But I’m here tonight, and I find Grayson and Ava by the bar when I walk in, which is where I plan to be stationed all night.

I head in that direction, and I greet some teammates along the way with a friendly nod of my head or one of those close-lipped smiles.

Ava gives me a hug, and Grayson slaps me on the back as I nod at the bartender.

“What’s on tap?” I ask.

“Stella, Coors Light, Michelob Ultra, Leinenkugel Summer Shandy, and Guinness.”

I’m not picky when it comes to beer. Sometimes I like an IPA, sometimes I prefer a lager, and sometimes I’ll really throw things off and drink whiskey just for fun.

And as I glance around the room tonight, I can’t help but think it’s a whiskey kind of night.

“Whiskey,” I say, and the bartender nods with a chuckle.

“Ice?”

I shake my head and toss a bill into the tip jar. When he sees the denomination of the bill, he pours a little more into the tumbler.

He hands it over with a smile, and I stand chatting with Grayson and Ava for a while until Ava sees some of the other football wives she wants to catch up with.

“What’s going on, man?” Grayson asks. “How was mandatory minicamp?”

I roll my shoulders and reach up to massage one that’s got a knot in it from a week of training. “Same shit every year. You’d think at some point I’d be smart enough to stop putting my body through it, but it’s the addiction to the game. How’d you give it up?”

He laughs and holds his drink in the air toward his wife. “I found a woman I was more addicted to than I was to football.”

As he says the words, a woman with long, red hair wearing a gold dress that offers see-through peeks of her skin walks up to the bar. She tosses that long hair behind her shoulder, and I listen, mesmerized, as she orders two drinks: a shot of vodka and a dirty martini, extra dirty.

She picks up the shot of vodka while he makes the martini, and fuck, she’s sexy. I watch her as she taps the shot glass on the bar, then tips it up to her lips. She sucks back the liquid, swallows without a flinch, and slams the glass back on the bar without even wiping her mouth.

“You know what I mean?” Grayson says. “Ash? Asher? You with me?”

I clear my throat as I tear my gaze from the woman and force it to my brother. “Huh?”

“Minicamp,” he says, as if I have any idea what he’s talking about.

“Oh, right.” I shake my head a little. “What about it, again?”

He laughs and slaps me on the back. “I was just saying how minicamp is the first impression of what this year’s team will look like.”

“Yes. Correct.” I nod as I try to focus on this conversation. “And it’s different without you in there, man.” I clap him on the shoulder.

I glance over for one more look at that gorgeous woman again, but she’s gone.

I look in front of us to try to spot her again, but the crowd is getting bigger, and it’s like she disappeared into thin air.

“Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? Is your golden jacket too tight?”

“What?”

He sighs.

“Sorry. That woman at the bar a second ago…do you know who she is?”

His brows dip. “What woman?”

“The one with the red hair.”

He shakes his head. “Sorry, man. I didn’t see her.”

I suck in a breath and force myself to pull it together and focus on my conversation with my brother. But the truth of the matter is that I haven’t found a woman who grabbed my interest immediately like that in a long, long time. Maybe ever.

It’s purely physical. That little peek of her skin under her tit was what snagged my attention. It’s been too long since I’ve had sex.

But tonight…maybe all that can change.