Chapter 10

I knewLiam wanted to be prepared and have answers and solutions to things, but the truth was, neither of us knew for sure what was going on with us. Neither of us knew how Annie would truly handle it if I told her I wanted to try dating her best friend. I had some idea of the comments she might come out with about it. My age and his, that I’d known him since childhood, wasn’t that a little creepy, and why did I have to pick her best friend. Some of those things had been through my own mind. Some of it I had answers for, some I wasn’t so sure about.

Age is but a number.

I didn’t pick Liam. It wasn’t something I set out to do.

Maybe it was a bit weird. But it wasn’t something I had thought about long-term. It wasn’t that I’d encouraged him in any way. Hell, I hadn’t given a single thought about him until that night in the garden the day they came back from uni. In my mind, that helped take the creepy off it, and I could only hope Annie believed me.

I considered the fact that Liam had thought about us breaking up before we’d had a chance to begin. Something in that really got to me. There was a pang in my chest at the notion of not being around him. It scared me a little. Was I already thinking of him that much? Was this already getting so full-on that after one kiss, the idea of breaking up something that wasn’t even a relationship yet pulled on my heartstrings?

It worried me. None of us knew what was going to happen, sure. We knew what we hoped would, but if my divorce had taught me anything, it was that nothing in life came with a guarantee. We were all here to do our thing and hope for the best. Add to that this was the first relationship I had even considered since my ex-wife. It all made me a little nervous that I was thinking about it more seriously than I should have been so early on.

“Penny for them?” Liam asked, sitting beside me on the sofa as he took a bite of the food I’d ordered from Wagamama.

Dismissing the thoughts, I shook my head. “Oh, just stuff and nonsense,” I replied with a smile.

Liam looked like he didn’t believe me. I wasn’t sure I would have believed me either. “Would you mind if I asked a random question?” he asked, wincing as though he wasn’t sure if he should be asking at all.

“Of course you can.”

“Did you ever want more kids than just Annie?”

I was a bit taken aback, and I wondered if he was thinking too far ahead, but it also gave me a warm feeling inside to know that kind of thing was on his mind. “I did. She didn’t. So, we had Annie and that was it. Why, are you thinking of having kids sometime soon?” I laughed a little.

Liam shrugged. “I would like all the things you’ve already done. I’d like the kids, and the wedding, and all of that. But I also appreciate it’s something you might not be interested in doing all over again.”

I shook my head. “No, I would absolutely do it again with the right person. I’m not that bloody old that I should be thinking of my retirement, you know.” I smirked.

A flash of something flickered across Liam’s face. Was he really thinking about me with all those things? And dear God, why did the thought of him considering all that with me make my heart flutter and give me butterflies in my stomach? We had kissed. Once. That was it. How the hell was I so damn invested in the could and might of everything a future with him as a partner would have?

“Sorry. I know that’s random and makes me seem insane to have it in my head right now, but it was something I had wondered about before all this.”

I touched his hand. “You don’t need to explain. Phillipa hadn’t wanted to have kids. The signs were all there, but then she found out she was pregnant with Annie, and we openly talked about the fact that she didn’t want children. Which was news to me because I wanted a whole house full with the woman I loved. Before we married, I thought that was what she wanted too. But she got into her career, and that seemed to be the focus of her life. By then, we were married, and I was still stupid, young, and hopeful things would change.”

“But they didn’t?”

“No. They got a lot worse. I don’t know why the divorce hit me as hard as it did because it wasn’t like she had been very invested in our marriage for years beforehand.”

“I didn’t know.”

“You were very young. How would it have been on your radar? It was just one of those things, I guess.”

“But it didn’t make you jaded about love?”

Talking about life, love, and everything else like this with Liam was refreshing. It was nice to talk to someone and not have to explain that I was a divorced man and how all that came about. Liam already knew the basics, and filling in the finer details didn’t bother me. I guess I hadn’t realised how much I had missed having someone be interested in me as a person and not just as a participant in a sex act.

“No, it didn’t. I guess I hadn’t thought much about it before now. I was happy enough with my status quo. What about you? You were pretty serious all through university. What happened there?”

He rolled his eyes with a sigh. “I was ‘just a phase’ while he was in university, not someone he would ever consider having any kind of actual life with, and that was the end of that.”

“What a prick.”

Liam smiled. “My thoughts exactly, once I got over the initial shock.”

I thought about Liam planning a future with someone, only to have it dashed when they announced they had other plans. It wasn’t unlike what happened with Phillipa. Sure, the finer details were different, but the basics were the same. We loved someone who hadn’t been on the same page as us and we didn’t know it properly until the end.

“I think, like you, I knew it wasn’t perfect, and he wasn’t all he claimed, but at the same time, to be told I was just his gay phase in uni was a bit of a kick in the balls. He fucked off with some tart he met on his gap year. They’re out there now ‘finding themselves’.” Liam groaned at the last part and surrounded the last two words with air quotes.

I grinned at him. “While I hate that he hurt you, I’m glad he decided he needed to go on without you.”

I touched his shoulder and he leaned in against my hand. Sparks ignited where his skin touched mine, and the desire that had been simmering underneath kicked into high gear. I slid my hand to the nape of his neck and pulled him closer to me, needing to claim his mouth.

Reading my intention, his hand went to my face, and he turned more towards me. The moment our lips touched, everything else faded into the background. It was just him and me and the burning desire between us. His tongue licked along mine, and I knew in that moment that this time I wouldn’t stop at a kiss. I wouldn’t stop until I had him crying out my name. I needed this man with an intensity I had never felt before, and I was damned if I was going to ignore it.

The ferocity of it all scared me a little, worried that something that burned so bright, so fast, perhaps wasn’t meant to last. Liam’s actions pushed all thoughts of that from my head as he moved on the sofa without breaking our connection and slid across my lap, straddling me.

The feeling of his hardness against mine, of this strapping example of maleness sitting in this position with me lit the touch paper of the emotions and lust that had bubbled since we had our first hint of what was to come that night in the kitchen.

My hands traced across his thighs before coming to rest on his hips, grabbing hungrily at his clothed flesh. He shifted his hips against me, and I moaned against his mouth. I cupped his arse and pulled him hard against me. The more our bodies connected, the greater the need to take this man to my bed grew. I needed more of him, I needed him naked, spread out for feasting on before me.

Breathlessly, we parted our kiss. “Jesus, Rich,” Liam panted.

“You okay?” I asked, my voice slightly raspy.

He licked his lips. “Oh, all good.” He leaned in closer again.

“You sure?” I smirked.

“Very sure.” He grinned before his mouth was on mine again.

Finding the hem of his T-shirt, I let my hands roam up over his back, my fingertips tracing over his skin. He rewarded me with a moan and rocked his hips against me. He was driving me insane with need, and I couldn’t take it anymore. Liam had clearly been reading my mind because he pried his mouth from mine and shifted away from me.

“Come on.” He stood and held his hand out to me. I didn’t hesitate to take his hand in mine and let him lead me wherever he wanted us to go. Silently, he led me to the stairs and started to go up.

As we got to the landing, close to my bedroom door, I paused. “Are you sure about this?” I needed to hear him say he wanted me too.

“Fuck, yes. I’ve been thinking about this for weeks.” A blush rose on his cheeks as I grinned and kissed him fiercely. My heart soared to think he had been fantasising about me at the same time I had been stroking my cock and thinking about him.