13. Cash

"Are you sure this is safe? What kind of risks are we looking at?"

Fern rolled her eyes at him. "Your sweet little birdie is perfectly safe in my very capable hands. But I need silence. Go wait in the other room with Liam, please."

She shooed him away, herding him with her hands and body and not actually giving him a choice. He backed out slowly, keeping his eyes on Ore for as long as possible. He didn't like the idea of leaving him alone. Things were unsettled between them, and he hated it, his panther getting even more possessive. It wasn't that he hadn't wanted him to start getting his memories back, but he wasn't ready. They'd been living in a bubble, neither one bringing up the future or talking about a plan, and now they were out of time.

His bird smiled at him. "It's going to be fine."

He even sounded like he believed it, but there was a thread of uneasiness in his scent that matched Cash's own. For better or for worse, with Fern's help, they were hopefully going to be getting Ore's full memory back. No more waiting. No more limbo where they played house together, ignoring the fact that everything was going to come crashing down eventually.

He closed the door behind him when Fern cleared her throat loudly. As soon as he did, he couldn't hear a single thing through it, not even their heartbeats. Scowling, he eyed the solid wood etched with runes. Sound blockers.

The room on the other side was half greenhouse, half meeting space their tiny coven used on the back side of Fern's house. He understood the need for privacy, but he didn't like not being able to at least hear if Ore called him for help. If he was in there with basically anyone other than the most powerful witch he knew, he'd storm back in and drag him out.

Cash took a couple of deep breaths to try and calm his panther and then made his way back to the front of the house, where Liam and Saint were both waiting in the living room. Liam because he wanted to know as soon as Ore remembered what had happened to him. And Saint because… Well, as he put it, it was his job as Cash's best friend to be there for him during hard times.

While he appreciated the sentiment, he didn't like the fact Saint was anticipating the worst.

He looked between the two of them where they sat on opposite ends of Fern's couch, both with their phones in their hands. He could tell from the way Liam was frowning that he was reading his emails, whereas Saint was grinning and tapping at the screen manically. Definitely playing a game.

"She said it might be a while," Cash let them know, lowering himself into a recliner near Saint. Fern had warned him and Ore that the process could be lengthy, depending on how much rebuilding Ore's brain had done on its own.

That's what she called it: rebuilding the bridge. She said she might have to do more work if it wasn't sturdy enough. He didn't really understand what that meant, but considering he barely understood half the things she did with magic, he didn't argue with her. He just prayed that once they finally knew the truth, it wouldn't devastate him and his little bird.

Hours passed without a single peep or sighting of Fern or Ore. At one point, one of Fern's mates, Matt, came into the room and offered them beverages and snacks, insisting on bringing them at least water when they all declined.

Every twenty minutes or so, Cash would get up and pace for a while until Liam growled at him in annoyance, and then he'd sit back down. He didn't take it personally. Saint couldn't stop fidgeting either—though for a different reason than Cash's anxiousness. He just couldn't handle sitting still for too long.

Cash wished he was in the room with Ore, maybe holding his hand or talking to him if he got scared, but Fern had made it very clear she needed to be able to completely concentrate if they didn't want her to possibly fuck up his brain. Which he definitely did not want. He wanted his little bird exactly the way that he was: sweet and loving and perfectly filthy.

"This is ridiculous," Saint finally said, almost three hours in. "How long can this possibly take? What is she doing to him back there?"

Cash shrugged. "Rebuilding the bridge."

Saint narrowed his eyes at him, like he wasn't sure if Cash was fucking with him or not. "I don't even know what that means."

"It means be patient," Liam cut in, typing something on his phone. "If anyone can do this, it's Fern."

Grunting, Saint sagged back against the couch, drumming his fingers on his thighs a second later.

Cash had to agree with Liam. She was not only powerful but clever, constantly coming up with new ways to do things to help their pack. When Jorge had first come across the idea of magically infused tattoos, she had helped him with the formula until he could start testing. Whenever he got stuck on something, she was the first person he turned to.

Cash glanced down at the symbol just below the inside of his left elbow. It was glowing faintly like it always did, but it was one he never used and prayed he'd never need to.

The others came in handy sometimes, even if just for fun with the cubs. There was a just beneath his collarbone that silenced his footsteps. He used it when he was pretend stalking the cubs through the woods, teaching them to use not just their ears but their eyes and noses.

Another could give him a boost of strength temporarily. And one on his thigh, that hurt like a bitch when he activated it, increased his healing capabilities—but at a price. That one left him exhausted after he used it, his body becoming whole but then passing out for twelve hours afterward.

So far, Jorge hadn't offered those tattoos to anybody else, but he'd concocted one for Riggs, a beta in the pack, and his human mate, Myles. After they'd bonded a few months ago, Myles had started looking for a way to fully bond with his mate without spontaneously growing fangs. Jorge's solution had been pretty ingenious, using a mixture of magic and Myles's blood to bind them together and giving Myles the same ability to feel Riggs's emotions that his mate had gained after biting him.

Jorge was still fiddling with the rune tattoos, wanting them to be perfect before offering them to other packmates. Once he tried them out on a few more volunteers, he could then start selling the service to those outside the pack. He'd confessed to Cash a while ago that he was worried about strangers having to come into their territory to get to his shop.

Considering how much business it would bring into their pack, Cash had told him that if anyone had a problem with it, he should send them to him, and Cash would tell them where to shove it.

The only other person Cash knew with tattoos like his was Liam's brother. Jorge hadn't done those; he'd only shared the initial concept with one of Quentin's witches. She'd been concerned that her very human leader was too vulnerable without some sort of magical protection. Cash was sure some of the spells she had come up with for him were similar, but he knew for a fact there were some on Quentin that Cash would never need.

Things that had grossed out Liam when his brother had let slip what some of his runes could do.

When Saint started getting more fidgety and Liam's jaw tense, Cash reached over and shoved at his knee. "You don't have to stay. I'll let you know once we know anything."

Saint leaned back, rubbing his palms against his thighs a few times. "No, I'm fine. I can hang with you guys."

He and Liam exchanged a look, and then their alpha turned to Saint. "Go make yourself useful somewhere else, please."

Saint sighed at them but pushed to his feet. "Fine, but text me as soon as she's done with him." He stopped next to Cash's chair, gripping the side of his neck and giving him a brief scenting. "It's going to be fine, brother."

Cash forced a smile and nodded. He wasn't so sure about that, but he knew the only way for things to be alright was for the man still patiently waiting with him to do something.

He waited until he was sure Saint was gone, and then he leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his knees and dropping his gaze to the floor between his feet. "I was hoping to talk to you about something."

Liam rustled around, shoving his phone in his pocket and scooting closer on the couch, then mimicked his pose, his loosely clasped hands coming into his line of sight. "Let's talk, then. What's going on?"

"Ore and I…" He wasn't sure how to finish that. What he was going to ask for wasn't something easy. Did he even have the right to ask?

Maybe not, but he had to anyway. He couldn't live without his little bird, and he'd rather stay with him and Pops. Luckily, he didn't have to try and figure out how to spit the words out.

"You're mates." It wasn't a question, and there wasn't a hint of surprise in Liam's voice or scent.

Cash nodded, squeezing his hands together until they ached. "Fated. I knew it the moment I saw him. Eventually, I just couldn't fight it anymore."

Liam didn't say anything, and Cash could only handle the silence for a few seconds before he had to glance up. Liam had a thoughtful look on his face, his eyes distant as he nodded slowly. His scent was fluctuating a lot, like Liam was working through some intense emotions.

"You want him to stay," he finally said, turning his azure eyes on Cash. "You want him to become a part of the pack."

"I do." Cash sat up straight. "I think he'd be a valuable member. He's smart and kind and generous?—"

Liam held up a hand, stopping him before he could continue to list the other hundred wonderful qualities his bird had. "I'm sure he is and more, but you know that isn't the issue."

Cash swallowed. "I know the issue, and I know you can change it." Liam's eyes sharpened, a thrum of power surging in the room, so Cash tacked on a belated "sir."

The crackling in the room eased back down as Liam sighed heavily and leaned against the couch, running a hand through his shoulder-length hair and looking tired in a way Cash rarely saw. "You know it isn't as easy as that."

Cash moved forward on his seat, eager to convince his alpha differently. "It can be though. You're the alpha. What you say goes."

"If I want to stay the alpha, then I can't run the pack that way," Liam reprimanded softly. "If I go too far too fast, people will leave, weakening us further. Or I could be forced out, maybe even killed in a challenge."

Cash doubted he'd actually be taken down by anyone in their pack. Whether as a human or a lion, Liam was fierce as hell and a well-trained fighter, unlike a lot of shifters who simply relied on their superhuman strength and speed. Liam had been taught from a young age how to fight, how to use all of his advantages to the best of his ability and how to mitigate any disadvantages he had.

The few times Cash had sparred with him, he'd gotten his ass kicked within minutes.

But he understood what Liam was trying to say. A lot of alphas were basically dictators, and what they said went. It often ended up killing a pack. Members left, and the ones that stayed didn't trust their alpha. That disconnect between alpha and pack weakened their bonds, which in turn weakened all of them, including the alpha. That was no way to be an effective leader.

"I think most people would be with you," Cash insisted, not willing to give up just yet.

"Maybe, but the loudest voices will be the Billy Mittins of the pack."

Cash scowled fiercely. "Then they can leave, and Billy can be the first out the fucking door. We don't need people like that here. If we open it up and allow non-cats to join, we could grow and thrive in a way we haven't in generations," Cash said vehemently, leaning forward. "You know I'm right. How many times have we talked about this, all of us in your office? I know we're waiting for the right moment, but maybe there isn't one."

"Cash…" Liam said softly.

"Please, just think about it. That's all I ask."

Liam stared at him, studying his tense body and face. Then, he nodded once. "I will. I'll think about it, but I can't make any promises. I can't even promise that if we do try and change pack law, there won't be… repercussions we can't anticipate."

Cash heard what he was saying. Forcing a radical change on the pack could have a backlash that put all of them in danger, maybe especially Ore. He could become a target as the "instigator" of change.

Jaw tightening, Cash glanced at the door blocking him from seeing or hearing his mate. He would never allow anything to happen to him, but he appreciated the warning.

"I understand. Thank you."

Cash wasn't sure if he'd convinced him or not, but he knew Liam would consider what he had said. He hadn't said he would just to placate him. That wasn't his style.

The question now became: if Liam decided not to change the pack law that would allow Ore to stay, would Cash stay? Or would he go?

Even contemplating staying behind while Ore went back to wherever he'd come from, felt like a knife to his gut. His panther scratched at the surface, furious at the idea. There was no way he could do it. He hadn't even fully claimed his little bird yet, and he was already fully consumed by him.

Just like his parents had been with each other.

But unlike them, Ore was the best person Cash had ever met. He brought out only the good in him. His protective instincts, his playfulness, his desire for a family.

The fear he'd had his whole life of turning into his parents seemed silly now. And like he should have known better. He'd seen other fated mates in his lifetime who hadn't destroyed each other and those around them.

So why had he been afraid for so long?

Not actually a difficult question to answer after all his years of therapy as a kid. His parents' abandonment had scarred him in a way he would never fully recover from. No matter how much logic and insight he gained as he grew older, a small, childlike part of him remained that felt like everyone he loved would leave him.

When Nan died, the idea had been reinforced. And as he'd watched Pops get older and more frail each year, the fear of being left all alone in the world had gripped him tight. Putting him in a stranglehold that only allowed him to focus on protecting those around him.

Then Ore had crashed into his life like the fiercest of windstorms, a tempest of feathers and shy smiles and pure temptation.

Suddenly, he could breathe again.

His fear didn't completely evaporate, but he could see past it now instead of drowning.

No matter what happened with his pack, he knew without a doubt that he and Ore would build a future together. He'd never have to be alone again.

Footsteps drew him out of his deep thoughts, his heart starting to race in his chest as Ore's floral scent hit him, excitement weaving through the notes. He didn't smell like pain or fear, which was good, and there was also no anger or disappointment.

Whatever happened next, at least his little bird was happy.

Ore skipped into the room, bubbling over with glee, and threw himself into Cash's lap. "I remember!"

Cash grunted at the landing, then wrapped his arms around Ore's body to hold him secure. "What do you remember, little bit?"

Liam set his phone next to him, all of his attention on Ore, but he didn't seem to notice their audience. He pressed in close and dragged his face up Cash's neck before shivering and releasing a soft sigh.

"My parents," he whispered, voice thick with emotions and the salt of his tears tickling Cash's nose. "I remember my parents. Can we call them?"