14. Blaise

Ilet myself into Toby's flat and immediately found my arms full of five foot-something of vampire.

"How was it?" He pressed against my chest, holding me tight. "Are you okay?"

"I'm good," I murmured into his hair, my arms automatically wrapping around him. It was funny how something that had been so foreign before I met Toby now felt so familiar. "It was…okay. Surprisingly so."

"I'm so glad." He pulled back, grinning up at me. "And I'm so fucking proud of you, Blaise."

For a second, I was caught in a trance. His lips were right there, mere inches from mine. I could taste the mint on his breath. So close. All I'd have to do was lean forward and…

Toby cleared his throat and took a delicate step back. "I ordered Chinese. Figured you deserved a treat after today."

Fuck. I couldn't believe how close I'd come to screwing up again. What about a hard limit was my brain struggling with?

Thankfully, Toby didn't call me on it, striding away to the table and pulling a chair out for me. "Come sit. I got you sweet and sour chicken, Hong Kong style, and egg fried rice."

My favourites. It had come up in conversation a few days ago, I couldn't believe he'd remembered. A small bowl of mushroom chow mein sat at his place. Unlike the popular myths, vampires could and did eat human food. It wasn't needed for sustenance, not in the same way blood was, but I'd noticed Toby generally joined me for meals.

I couldn't deny that I liked it. It felt…domestic. Homely. Something I'd been missing for a while, without even realising it.

Toby didn't ask any questions while we ate, which I was grateful for. I'd been afraid I'd walk in and he'd demand to know everything. I should've known better than to think Toby would do that. One thing I'd already learned was that he put my needs first.

When our plates were clear and loaded in the dishwasher, I turned to Toby and exhaled shakily. "I wanna talk about this, I just feel…"

"Unsettled?" Toby's eyes shone with understanding as I nodded. "It's okay, I can help with that."

Without another word, he led me to the living room. He shoved the coffee table to the side before pointing to the rug. I sank to my knees gracefully thanks to the practice I'd had over the past few weeks.

"Here." He pushed a colourful object into my hands. It was a series of connected coloured balls, each the size of a marble. Held together by an elastic, they were arranged in a circle. I'd seen things like these before, but they were always plastic. These ones were metal though.

A lump formed in my throat. Had Toby had these made just for me?

"While you talk, I want you to see how many shapes you can make with those. I don't want you to look away from them. Keep your attention on that while answering my questions. Okay?"

"Yes, Master."

His fingers twined through my hair, not pulling, just holding steady. "Good boy. Now, do you want to just talk? Or would you rather I ask questions?"

I twisted the balls into a spiral. "Questions."

"Great. Did Dr. Tyler make you feel comfortable?"

The balls clicked around as I untwisted the spiral. "Yes. He didn't force me to speak or push at all. He seemed genuinely interested in me."

Master stroked my scalp. "Because you are an interesting person, Blaise."

It was a good thing I had to keep my eyes on the toy, because if Master had spotted my eye-roll, I definitely would've earned myself a punishment.

"What did you find easiest to talk about?"

"You." The balls clicked into the shape of a square.

There was a pause before the next question. "And the hardest?"

The square became a circle. "Bailey."

His fingers twitched in my hair. "I'm so proud of you for bringing that up in the first session, Blaise."

The questions continued in that vein. With my master leading the conversation and the fidget to distract me, I found it surprisingly easy to open it up. With him in control, I didn't need to worry. All I had to do was obey.

After telling him what my homework was for the following week—to make a list of five things that made me happy—he moved his grip from my hair to the back of my neck. "And you're going to go back, yes?"

"If you're going to insist," I grumbled, twisting the balls into another spiral. I didn't know why I was bratting—it hadn't been as bad as I'd been expecting and I could see the benefits it'd have if I stuck with it. Something had me wanting to push a little though.

Master's tone was amused, like he knew exactly what I was doing. "Damn straight I'm going to insist, boy. Consider your attendance there officially added to your list of rules."

Before I could formulate a sassy response, he was reaching down and tugging the toy out of my hands.

"You did great, Blaise. Thank you for sharing all of that with me." When I didn't raise my head, he touched my chin. "Blaise? What's wrong?"

I frowned. "You didn't say I could look up."

There was a pause followed by a low groan. From the corner of my eye, I saw Toby adjust himself. "Fuck, boy. You can look at me now."

I was surprised by the heat of his gaze as it slammed into mine. "Did I do something wrong?"

Master's eyes were hooded. "No, the exact opposite. Your submission is a thing of beauty, and the things it does to me…" He shivered. "With that and going to therapy, you've more than earned yourself a reward. Question is, what do you want?"

That answer was easy. "To not decide."

"Goddess," he hissed, pressing against his erection. My own shaft was thickening, my arousal building at the visible effect I was having on my master. "What you do to me, boy."

I preened internally, thrilled at how easily I seemed to please him.

"So many options…" Master drawled, running his thumb over my lips. "Given how many times you've bought it up, how about a spanking?"

My dick twitched. "Not, like, a punishment though, right?"

He smirked. "No, definitely not like a punishment. It'll give you the release you've been craving, and I'll even allow you to come. This time."

"Fuck." I reached down to palm my erection. Before I could, Toby cleared his throat and I quickly stopped myself. Balls, I wasn't supposed to touch myself unless instructed. "Sorry, Master."

"That's okay, Blaise, I like seeing how excited you are." His tone was conversational as his hand gripped my throat and squeezed. "Remind me though, who does your cock belong to?"

"You," I choked out, turned on beyond belief. "It belongs to you."

I wish all of me belonged to you.

I did, I supposed, but only temporarily. That was something I couldn't let myself forget. It didn't matter how right this all felt. How much Toby had transformed my life for the better in such a short amount of time.

"Good boy," he purred. "Now take yourself into the bedroom and strip. I'll be there in a second."

I used the time it took me to do this to get my head back in the right space. The one where I didn't wish for things I couldn't have, and reminded myself to enjoy what I had before it was gone.

When Toby entered, he was naked and holding a small tube of cream. When I looked at it questioningly, he held it up. "Aloe vera. You'll heal quickly, but seeing as this is a reward, I don't want you to feel any discomfort afterwards."

I tilted my head curiously. "So, if it was a punishment, it'd be different?"

"Oh yes." He flashed his teeth at me. "If this was a punishment, I'd be making sure you couldn't sit down for hours after without feeling it. There'd be no coming for you, just a reminder that you'd broken the rules and why you shouldn't do it again."

I knew he hadn't meant to turn me on, but I couldn't stop the tremble in my hands at his words. I wanted that. I wanted to sit down and feel him still.

Toby chuckled, like he could read my mind. Sitting against the headboard, he patted his lap. "Don't worry, boy, I won't leave you wanting. You're going to get exactly what you need from this, I promise."

I knelt up on the bed beside him, feeling awkward as I was reminded of the size difference between us. How exactly was I supposed to drape myself over him?

Toby rolled his eyes and grabbed my shoulder. Before I could blink, he'd manoeuvred me into position. My elbows were on one side of him, leaning against the bed. My legs hung over the other side, feet dangling in the air.

And my cock? That was nestled between his naked thighs. The coarse hair on his legs created a delicious friction against the skin of my shaft.

"There." Toby's voice was full of satisfaction as he rubbed one of my cheeks. "Are you comfortable?"

I wriggled to check, happy I wasn't about to slip off. "Yep."

"Remember your safe words."

That was the only warning he gave me before his hand came down on my glutes. The hit wasn't hard, but the surprise of it had me crying out.

"That's it," he crooned, rubbing the skin with his hand. "Let me hear you, boy."

A resounding crack filled the air as he let another hit fly. They came in quick succession, and never in the same place. He moved around my backside in an indefinable pattern, even adding a few to the tops of my thighs.

Every now and then he'd pause to rub my skin gently. Then, just as my body started to relax, he'd switch back to delivering the hits.

I cried out with each contact, my hips thrusting forwards as my body tried to escape the pain. The movement had my dripping cock thrusting between Toby's thighs. I was caught in a never-ending cycle of pain and pleasure.

More than that, the sting of his hits seemed to be unlocking something in me, something I hadn't even realised was locked. Emotion was bubbling up in my chest, pushing at my throat, begging to be released. I fought against it. Refused to let it spill over.

Suddenly Toby stopped, his hand tilting my head to the side so he could see my face. He gave me a smile, one so full of heartache and understanding that it made my breath catch. "Let it go, Blaise. Stop fighting it."

My response was automatic, even if I wasn't certain I could do as he asked. "Yes, Master."

His hits resumed, and this time, I didn't think of anything except his hand striking my skin. I let go of it all, flying higher with every hit. It was like he was taking me apart and putting me back together. And the best part about it?

I just had to let him. Nothing was required of me except to feel.

My cheeks were wet before I realised I was crying. Even with my sobs filling the air, my hips were still thrusting forwards, chasing a release. It shouldn't have been within reach. Nothing about this should've been turning me on.

But it was. I craved my master's touch. His control. His focus.

I was flying so high. Everything was electric. Nothing else existed except him.

My orgasm hit without warning, my whole body tensing as I came.

I drifted in a fog as the waves faded away. My brain was humming happily, not bothered by the tears drying on my face or the ache in my rear. I was content, like Toby had wrapped my brain in a duvet and cuddled it in close. My mind searched for the right word, struggling to name what I'd never felt before.

Bliss. That's what I was feeling.

I was dimly aware of Toby massaging cream into my skin before nudging me onto my side. He disappeared from under me, and a warm cloth wiped over my abdomen.

"Sleep now, Blaise," he said gently, rolling me to the other side of the bed.

I reached out blindly, my chest loosening as I caught his arm. "Don't leave me."

Toby sighed before sliding in beside me and gathering me into his arms. "I'm not going anywhere."